An uneasy silence settled between them. Julianne drew in a deep breath and turned her attention to the portrait beside the casket.
“I took that picture of him. I’d just found out that I was pregnant with you. I don’t even think I’d told him yet.” A sad smile played on her lips. “He was so excited when I did. All he’d ever wanted was to be a father. If it were up to him, we would have had ten more after you.”
Alec tried to swallow the lump that was forming in his throat. “But if it were up to you, you wouldn’t have even had me, right?”
Julianne met his gaze again. “I don’t expect you to forgive me for what I did to your father. The truth is that I’ve never forgiven myself. But I want you to know that I tried, Alec. I honestly tried to be the wife and the mother that the two of you deserved. But I wasn’t. I knew I never could be. So yes, I took the easy way out, and there isn’t a day that’s gone by that I haven’t regretted it.”
She nodded over his shoulder at Rebecca and Shania. “You have people in your life that care about you, people you can rely on. You have that because you’re just like your father. He always thought of others first. I never did, and you see where that’s gotten me. The only family I have left is a son who wants nothing to do with me, and I don’t blame you for that. I have no one to blame but myself.”
Alec was startled when she abruptly turned away. He almost let her go, but he thought better of it. He couldn’t let those be the last words they exchanged. Not on a day like this.
“Mom?” he called.
Julianne stopped and turned back to him. “What is it, Alec?”
“I’m sorry for your loss.”
She gave a little nod. “And I’m sorry for yours.”
Chapter 46
“So we’ll see you back at our place, then?” Jeff asked as he and Rebecca exited the foyer.
“Yeah. But tell Alli not to stress about making a big dinner. I doubt either of us will eat very much.”
“I’ll remind her.” He leaned over and kissed her cheek. “Hang in there, sis. We’ll see you soon.”
Rebecca waved goodbye to her family as they climbed into Allison’s car. The entire week had been an endless blur of phone calls and paperwork and, more than anything else, looking out for her husband. She’d been so wrapped up in dealing with his grief that she hadn’t even stopped to consider her own yet.
She stepped back into the parlor and managed a half-hearted smile when Shania approached her. She’d cried on the phone when Rebecca gave her the news, and she’d obviously cried during the service, too. Shania mirrored her smile now, but there was no hiding the sorrow in her eyes.
Walter had obviously been as much of a father to her as he’d been to Rebecca.
“Glad you could make it,” she said.
“Thank you for letting me know.” The girls embraced for a moment before Shania pulled back. “How are you holding up?”
Rebecca shrugged. “I’ll be alright. It’s Alec I’m worried about. He’s barely slept. And it’s all I can do to get him to eat something.”
“It was always going to be a terrible time. There wasn’t any way around it.”
“I know.” Her eyes drifted over to Alec, who was conversing with his mother beside the casket. “I just wish there was something more I could do.”
Shania followed her gaze and let out a quiet sigh. “I really hope I’m wrong, Rebecca. I mean…I’d like to think that he’s changed since he’s met you, but…”
Rebecca frowned when her voice trailed off. “You think he’s going to shut me out?”
Shania looked back at her. “Like I said, I hope I’m wrong. But I wouldn’t be surprised if he does. It’s the only way he knows to cope. And he won’t mean to hurt you, but he won’t even realize that he’s doing it. That’s probably the most painful part of all.”
Rebecca knew that she was speaking from personal experience. And as much as she could try to convince herself that Alec would never do the same thing to her, deep down she couldn’t help but wonder if history was about to repeat itself.
“I know,” she admitted. “That’s exactly what I’m afraid of.”
*
By the following day, the cold front had passed, leaving a fresh dusting of snow in its wake. Most of it melted off when the sun came up, although a white layer remained on the very tops of the Tetons.
Their friends had offered to come to the burial, of course, but Alec wanted it to be just him and his wife. The way he saw it, burying his father was a private event, something that should be reserved for the family.
He and Rebecca stood together now at the freshly dug gravesite to say goodbye to the man who’d brought them together. The plot rested at the top of the hill behind the farmhouse, nestled in the center of a small aspen grove. Walter’s parents and grandparents had long ago been laid to rest here, becoming a permanent part of the land they’d cherished. One day, Alec supposed, he and Rebecca would join them.
He couldn’t help but notice how displaced the new headstone looked amongst the older ones. They were starting to crack and fade from exposure to the harsh Wyoming elements, but Walter’s glistened in the midday sun. Alec wondered how long it would be before his headstone, too, looked like it belonged here.
Never, he decided. People could argue it all they wanted, but death was the most unnatural event in the natural world.
It would never belong.
Alec took a seat in the grass, which still held the chill of the melted snow. Rebecca leaned over and wrapped her arms around his neck, gently hugging him from behind. He curled his hands around hers, and they stayed that way for several minutes before she spoke.
“Would you like to be alone?”
He gave a little nod. “I’ll be home soon.”
Rebecca held him for another moment before she stepped back. “Take your time.”
He watched her as she weaved through the trees and disappeared down the hill. Then he turned his eyes upward, studying the way the light filtered through the remaining leaves of the aspens. Their white bark was covered with prominent black markings, eerily shaped like human eyes.
What those eyes must have witnessed, Alec thought.
The grove was likely centuries old, standing in this spot long before his family purchased this land. He thought of the tribes that once inhabited this area–the Shoshone, the Cheyenne, and the Crow. How many of them had slept beneath these same trees? How many of them had lived here, loved here, and died here…their legacies long since forgotten? How many generations of his own family would eventually end up here? And how long would it be before no one remembered their names, either?
Walter was right. Life truly was precious because of how fleeting it was.
A breeze ruffled through the trees just then, bringing with it an unexpected tinge of warmth. He turned his eyes to the horizon and saw a reddish haze drifting in across the plains. In spite of himself, Alec managed to smile. It looked like Walter would get his Indian summer, after all.
Eventually he stood and gazed out over his land. With his father’s death, it truly was his land now. From here, he could see everything. He could see the farmhouse that had stood for nearly a hundred years. He could see the site of the original barn and storage shed that his great-grandfather had constructed with his bare hands. Alec could also see the work of his own making–the lodge, the modern barns, the guest cabins, and the staff quarters.
Everything that he’d built and everything that he’d accomplished…all of it had been for his father.
And now his father was gone.
“Well, Pop,” he said aloud. “What am I supposed to do now?”
The End
About the Author
Writing has always been my passion. I was hooked from the time I won the third-grade writing contest for my story about Nita, a very sophisticated and well-traveled peacock. By high school, my stories had developed into murder mysteries starring my (mostly!) understanding classmates. These days, my writing focuses on relationships
and explores the endless intricacies of family, loyalty, and love.
I was born and raised in the tropical sprawl of south Florida, surrounded by beaches, horses, and lots of sunshine. Before becoming a full-time writer, I worked as a bartender and a massage therapist. In recent years, my wanderlust has taken me all over the world, and I've traveled extensively throughout the Americas, Europe, Asia, and Oceania. When I'm not busy writing, I spend my time horseback riding, hanging out with my husband, or planning our next voyage abroad.
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Also by Amy Elizabeth:
Dead Heat
Cut and Run (Aspen Eyes #1)
Indian Summer (Aspen Eyes #2)
Showdown (Aspen Eyes #3)
Singled Out (Breaking Pointe #1)
Read on for a sneak peek at the final book in the Aspen Eyes Series, Showdown…
Showdown
Alec’s life is at a stand-still. In the wake of his father’s death, he has withdrawn from everything and everyone around him. It’s all he can do to get out of bed each morning, let alone focus his energy on his wife, his business, or his best friend’s upcoming wedding. But his grief isn’t the only thing keeping him down. He’s also struggling to make a weighty decision…undoubtedly the most difficult decision he’s ever faced.
Rebecca thought she was doing the right thing by giving Alec his space. She’d hoped that once he worked through the pain of his loss, their marriage would be stronger than ever. But the more she tries to reestablish their connection, the more he seems to pull away from her. When he finally reveals what’s on his mind–a vision of their future that couldn’t be more different than hers–Rebecca realizes that she has her own choice to make.
The only thing that’s certain is that everything on the Flying W is about to change. Especially since the greatest test of their relationship is still to come, from a source neither of them would have ever imagined…
Indian Summer Page 31