Nevertheless

by Ailisa Madrone

  "Yes, they are,'' Yelsew's mouth twisted in irony. ''Especially when they are able to beat you in a fight."

  Sven expression has changed. "She just got lucky that day. I am the most prepared soldier who have ever stepped on that training camp; it is humanly impossible that girl can win a second time."

  Yelsew smiled. "Of course."

  Navi looked at the door, feeling guilty for having used that tone with her. He should have been more patient, he shouldn't have lost his mind, and he should have been more clever when trying to solve this new problem. But how could he treat her any different if she has made the biggest mistake of her life?

  "What are we going to do about her?" The commander asked, bringing Navi's attention back to the table. "It's not as if a girl could join us all the way to Turilessa. And…"

  Vilanis leaned on the table when the commander stopped in mid-sentence, his eyes were full of curiosity. "And?"

  "The king of Turilessa," The commander said in response to Vilanis. "Behrooz is known for his fascination with women. He married two women on the same day and took both to bed on their wedding night. Later on, the two women were no longer enough to content him, and I dare to say that nowadays he is the man who has more women in our country. He is a king of voracious appetite, and also extravagant. He once held a feast that lasted thirty days."

  "Thirty days"? Vilanis' eyes shone with enchantment, his voice was stammering. He was shorter than Sven and Yelsew, redhead, with curly hair and freckles under his eyes and nose. A little too young and naive to be part of a militia.

  "I'm sorry," Yelsew entered the conversation. "But what do the king's women have to do with Mabel?"

  "I vote for her to stay here." The commander replied. "What if the king puts his eyes on her and decides he wants her? Mabel is not a lovely girl, but you have to agree with me that she is not unbearable."

  "Well," Sven said, liking the idea. "I pray they want her then."

  "This would solve most of my problems." Navi muttered to himself. He had a kingdom to look after and a father. And now he had a girl there, and that was the most difficult task of all.

  "What did you say?"

  "I said that I vote for her to stay here too." Navi answered to the commander, even though that wasn't what he had said before.

  The commander nodded, satisfied with Navi's answer: "And about you, Vilanis?"

  "I don't think she should stay here." He replied. "I think we should take her with us."

  "Since when did it stop being a casual conversation and turned into a voting?" Yelsew said.

  "Taking advantage of your comment, how about you?"

  "It shouldn't even be in question, but I agree with Vilanis. It wouldn't be safe for her to come with us, but it would be even less safe if she stayed here."

  The commander's head swayed to the side. "It looks like we have a tie. Sven?"

  "Well, we don't want a girl following us all the way, do we?"

  Navi and his men didn't stay too long in there; they had a long way to go. The door opened unexpectedly, scaring Mabel out there. Navi went out the door, always ahead. Vilanis came right behind him, tearing apart a roast thigh of some animal. That's how the general was like: he would never allow them to take a break. It was always at his own time; it was always his way.

  Mabel got up, not bothered to clean up the dirt on her clothes. "Are we going already?" No one answered. It was as if she was a lost soul roaming around and no one was listening.

  The squire was preparing the horses while the soldiers adjusted their armor and put on their helmets. "I'm going to get my stuff." As they haven't heard her before, Mabel thought they wouldn't hear her again. As she walked to the door, the general's voice echoed behind her:

  "Your sword is here, Mabel."

  She walked back towards him. She took the sword of his hand, and she noticed that was all Navi was holding. "Where is my helmet?"

  "You're not coming with us. And when we go back home, you'll not be part of my army. You have to understand that things are not supposed to be how you want them to be. There is a consequence for everything you do."

  "You can't do that!"

  Navi took a gold and silver knife from inside his boot and gave it to her. "Stay in the room, and you will be safe."

  "For three days? Are you serious?"

  "Don't open the door to anyone." He kept talking, ignoring her. "If you are in danger, use that. Do you know how to use a knife, don't you?"

  "You can't lock me in a room and expect me to wait for your return, as any girl was taught to do."

  "That's the best for everyone." Navi said, though it didn't sound like he believed it as much as he wanted to.

  The tavern's stableman brought the horses out, at the same time each of them got up on their horses. Mabel watched them climb onto the horse and settle into the saddle. After one lap they departed, not caring about what they were leaving behind.

  Mabel stood there, her eyes focused on where they were going. Instead of confessing she was shaken about her friends leaving her behind, she preferred to focus her eyes along the path the horses were going through in order to repeat it shortly thereafter. But, not without her helmet.

  Mabel didn't face anyone when she got in the tavern; she didn't want them to see her weakness. She went to the table where her friends had been, there was some food left on the table. Her helmet was in the same spot she had been sitting, and when she got it she lifted her eyes.

  She looked at all those men, at each one of them, and she felt embarrassed for them knowing she was now on her own. She pressed her hands around the helmet, trying to focus her frustration on that piece of metal instead of showing how helpless she was feeling. On the outside, she wanted to look safe and unshakable. That's not how she was feeling though.

  How could they abandon her? That wasn't something she would ever do. So why did they do it?

  "I'm looking for Gael." Mabel said to the counter man. As he constantly saw strange faces coming in and out that door, maybe he was the only one who could help her. She had hope. "He must be a bit younger than you, and he should have a bit more hair than you, skinnier and probably taller than you as well. Maybe looks like me. Did you see someone like that around here?"

  "I don't know him."

  "He was exiled from Navon a long time ago. I don't know anything about him, except he is good with knives. And he must fight very well. I need to find him, so if you know anything, please tell me."

  "I said I don't know him."

  "Are you sure?"

  Mabel felt the environment getting hostile by her insistence, and she was smart enough to know the right time to give up. These men are not used to giving information on anyone to people who are part of the King's Army. If it wasn't for that, maybe she would have been more successful on her goal.

  "Beware of the forest." Someone said to Mabel as she walked towards the exit. "It's dangerous for lonely girls like you."

  Their laughter went on as Mabel closed the door behind her. She left the tavern and took her horse with the stableman, all very fast. At the same time, a group of men came out of the tavern as well and took their horses for a last minute departure.

  Going through the road has become a slow walk, rather than having the horses trot with intensity and violence towards Turilessa's kingdom. Sometimes, one or two of Navi's men looked back, facing the way they were leaving behind.

  Still, Vilanis asked with his eyes for Sven to do something. He returned the look that meant "why don't you do that?" Yelsew watched the dark spots around his nail with a smile in his eyes as if he knew something they didn't know about, and the commander was walking too close to the general to have noticed any moves on his back.

  Only a few people can predict what will happen to them. Navi was too honorable to have the guts to abandon Mabel, although he wanted to leave her in that place to teach her a lesson of never following troops around.

  Navi suddenly stopped the horse, the other horses behind his almost hitt
ing each other. "That girl is crazy, and I'm also going crazy". Navi understood why his father chose her, after all. They were very similar. It was like his father's life was to keep him busy, preoccupied, and involved. And since Mabel came into his life, it has become her role to do so as well.

  Navi turned to his men. Who would he send to go back and stay with Mabel? Not Sven; he could kill her on the way. The commander was not an expert for this job, and Yelsew was too careless to handle a girl. Vilanis was good and friendly enough to stay with her. "Go back to the tavern and take care of Mabel, Vilanis. It will be just us four from here."

  Vilanis didn't wait for any further recommendation, and turned around.

  XIII

  "She doesn't hear her parents call her."

  The Ballad of Mulan

  ◊

  Mabel's intention was to follow the general's group of men, but she wasn't sure she could do it. She had to be alive for that, and that wouldn't happen if the men who stared at her outside the tavern reached her.

  It all happened suddenly. At one point, a group of six men managed to reach her. One of them stopped his horse right next to Mabel's and pushed her out of it, making her fall on her arm. For a few seconds she was unable to move while watching them dismount from their horses, surrounding her as a helpless prey.

  She struggled to get up and, although she was terrified, she ignored the pain in her arm. She knew that if she didn't do it, she would feel even stronger pain later. While she watched them move, her intact hand slowly reached the quiver on her back to take a sword out. It belonged to her father, but now it was hers.

  The men were laughing, and Mabel thought that in that context it could seem funny to see a girl drawing a sword, thinking she could actually pierce something. Maybe she was capable of it, and that was her advantage as they would never expect it from her.

  Why would they think they had the right to have any woman they laid their eyes on? This wasn't happening because she didn't stay in the room or because she was outside. It wouldn't make any difference. The world is not a safe place for women; were the smartest words her mother ever told her. She never hurt anyone before, and while she saw them approaching, she wondered if that would be the first time.

  The first man who approached her didn't anticipate her boost in his direction, and she hit the sword handle right on his nose. It wasn't intentional; he was just in the way. She thought it was broken, because a man that big shouldn't moan like that.

  He was angry. Well, anyone would be. The other men shortened the circle, but the big man, with a hand gesture he prevented them from moving any further. In silence, he told them he would take care of it. From a group crime, it became a personal situation.

  Mabel kept telling herself she had to be strong, because if she couldn't take care of it, how could she even defend her town? She didn't hesitate. Her hands were firm holding the sword, her legs didn't shake and her eyes didn't falter. This will be easy; she's done something like this before. She just had to keep the sword still in her hand and protect her belly, face and legs, keeping him away from vulnerable spots.

  "Just keep him away from vulnerable spots," Her father told her once. She could almost hear him talking to her, and it was painful that she had not been there that night for them.

  "You don't look brave now," The man told provocatively. "Unlike how you looked at the tavern when you were just some walls away from your friends."

  "Even after I hit your nose, do you still think I'm scared?"

  The man approached her, and when he was close enough, he raised his right arm and tried to punch her. She moved away, and he got so frustrated for having punched the air that he tried to punch her with his other hand, but Mabel was faster than him again. He looked like a big bully boy that couldn't think. When he passed his hand over Mabel's head trying to hit her, with the strength of her both hands she sank her fists on his belly, and then put her hands up to hit his chin. While he was dizzy, she punched his belly once again with both hands, but the intensity was higher this time, pushing him further back.

  A man who wasn't in the fight kicked Mabel's ankle so hard she dragged her leg in pain. He should have been nervous that his pal was losing the fight, so he decided to act that cowardly?

  The other man from before came back and pushed the other away, to get him out of his way. He approached her and hit his elbow on her back, and when she gave in on the ground in pain, he punched her in the stomach. A punch in a girl's belly can destroy her inside, Mabel found out on that day. Then he kicked her face with his knee, making her fall to the ground.

  After a moment, the man turned Mabel's back to the ground and she saw a man lying on top of her, pressing her back against the pointy and invasive pebbles on the ground. She tried to hit him, but he locked her hands between his knees; and when she tried to kick him, he locked her legs between his legs once he was thirty pounds heavier than she was. She spat on him in an attempt to make him stop, but he was a very disgusting man. He started to undress her, his awkward and disgusting hand going under her blouse while the other hand tried to open her trousers.

  He did all this while the other men were around, armed with knives, swords and crossbows. He only stopped because some men arrived, and Mabel didn't think they were there to help them. The man stopped. They all stopped.

  The men jumped quickly out of their horses, as if they were used to it. As if that's what they usually did; going to the rescue young helpless ladies all the time. Whoever they were, Mabel couldn't remain in that vulnerable position on the ground, so she made an effort to reach the sword even though her ribs were aching.

  "It's okay," One of them told her. "You won't need to use it today anymore."

  There was a certainty in his face and a calm in his look giving her confidence. And even though she believed in him, she didn't drop the sword.

  The man turned to the others. "Get the hell out of here all of you, if you want live."

  Mabel thought those bastards wouldn't accept the fact they were being sent away, but that didn't happen. They each got up on their horse to go away, as animals that lost their courage in the presence of a bigger opponent. And that wasn't really a relief for her, she was still terrified as those guys sent the other group away effortlessly.

  "And if this happens again," A guy said while those men left. "We won't spare you a third time!"

  Now there was only the new invaders and Mabel left. While they were looking at each other, a bird somewhere squeaked in a silent forest. "Thank you," Mabel decided to thank them, choosing to be the first to say something. "But if you guys had arrived a little later I would have been able to take care of them."

  "Of course," The first man replied, looking at her with the eyes full of irony. Mabel felt so humiliated. Why this had to be the only depressing way to punish a girl?

  "You had a disadvantage," The leader said, in a carefree tone. "There's no shame in admitting defeat. Unless you have a chance to win a fight and don't make enough effort; then you have the right to feel miserable."

  Mabel's eyes blinked with broken pride. They left a mess in her face, in her ribs and in her clothes; in her honor. She would have been fine if they had only beaten her up and not tried to do the rest. She wasn't ready for that. Her father never prepared her for a situation like that.

  "We should have killed them on the first time, so this would not happen a third time." The man said to the guy who seemed to be the leader.

  "We can't kill every man who tries to do that. There would be no one left." The leader was a boy, maybe a difference of ten years to the other man. He wasn't black or white. He had mixed blood, a half-breed. It was just how people called them. The strands of his hair were black like amber-dark, just like his full eyebrows, his hair was silkier and softer than anything you could run down your fingers on. He had a face difficult to forget.

  Mabel didn't know where these strange men came from, but they had just saved her life. "Who are you guys?"

  "I am Gaspar, at
your service Ma'am." Her savior said. He was taller than the leader and bigger too, but not because he was strong; his head was small for his broad shoulders and stocky body. He had wrinkles around his eyes, like someone who was experienced, and if he tried to frown, he could raise his forehead in a way that would intimidate any opponent. But if he smiled, the combination of the beard and short hair would make him look naive.

  "We are here to help you. We saw when they followed you from the tavern. These are my brothers," The leader said, pointing to the bunch. "And we'll escort you back."

  They are brothers? Because they were a gang; it wasn't possible that they were all brothers. Even if they were, they didn't look like. Some of them were robust and others weren't; some of them were good-looking and others weren't. Some of them seemed sober, and others didn't.

  "Thanks again," Mabel said. "But I'm going somewhere else."

  "Where?"

  "Why are you interested?" Mabel's voice was a little croaky. She cleared her throat, but even that effort hurt her rib.

  The leader's hair was messy, which seemed odd as Navi never left a strand out of place. His eyes were as cold as a hawk. He was handsome in a sloppy way, effortlessly. And she didn't think that someone who can have any woman he wanted had to use force to get something that could be given to him voluntarily. Someone with a face like that didn't need that.

  "We're worried about you since you'll be alone out there."

  Mabel could see beyond them, and as a soldier should keep their word, these men could do it too. Besides, they just saved her life. If they wanted to hurt her, they would have done. It never hurts to have someone who you can trust.

  She found her voice again. "I'm looking for someone."

  "Your brother? I heard you in the tavern." The leader watched her for a moment. "Why is it so important? After all, you're not in your home more. You are risking yourself for someone who may not even be alive anymore."