Men In Control (Smith Brothers Complete Series)

by Brenda Ford

  “But it’s too soon, isn’t it? Too soon for me to feel that way about him. Him too.”

  “Who said?” Ruby shrugs, totally unbothered by this suggestion. “Who makes the rules?”

  “I don’t know, it’s just… it’s quick, isn’t it? Maybe this is just because we haven’t had a proper honeymoon phase. We haven’t been allowed to have that, so maybe that’s why. Our feelings are all mixed up.”

  “Is that really what you think?” Ruby cocks an eyebrow at me. “Or not? That’s what you need to work out.”

  I sigh loudly. “I think I meant it; you know. When I said it. I think I do love him, whether it’s too soon or not. I definitely meant it. I have fallen in love with him. This isn’t anything like what I had with Daniel. It’s so much better. But that’s not to say that it doesn’t scare the living shit out of me.”

  “Honey, it scared the living shit out of me when I fell in love as well. But I didn’t let that stop me and it turned out to be the best thing that I ever let happen to me. Now, I’m happy as anything.”

  She’s right, but her situation was so much different to mine. She isn’t in something complicated. Her love story is a nice and straight forward, and it will probably continue to be so forever.

  “I don’t know if Brad feels the same way for real though, and I think that’s why I’m so hesitant. Can you imagine how embarrassing that it would be if he doesn’t and I do?”

  “He might be worried about the same thing, you know. If he’s even awake now.”

  He’s been waking up over and over again, but only a little bit. Not enough to get any real communication for him, which I suppose is a good thing really. I wouldn’t know what to say to him right now.

  “Oh, hold on.” As if I have conjured him up just by thinking about him in that hospital, my cell phone rings. “It’s Angelo. He might be about to tell me that Brad is up now.” I hit answer. “Hello?”

  “Hey, Tami, are you all done with your police interview now?” I make an agreeable sound. “Good, I hope it all went okay. Erm, Brad is awake now and he’s worried about you. I’m just calling to confirm to you that everything is okay. He’s panicked because he doesn’t like you being out there alone.”

  My chest tightens, I feel a bit sick about the whole thing. I’m hardly surprised that Brad is worried because he was with me throughout it all. But hearing those words only reminds me how serious this is.

  “Yeah, well I’m with Ruby, aren’t I? So, you can tell him that I’m fine. There’s nothing to worry about.”

  “Are you going to come here? I’m sure he would love to see you right now.”

  The urge to see him too claws at me, it gnaws painfully in my stomach. I would love to hold his hand, to touch his skin, to hear his loving voice. But I’m so scared of how it might go. What if he tells me that he regrets everything that he said? Then I will be absolutely gutted and humiliated. I don’t know if I can face this in my current emotional state. I’m not in the right frame of mind for it.

  “I’m shattered, Angelo, I think… if it’s okay with you guys, that while Brad has his brothers around him, I might head home and get some sleep. I really… yeah, I really do need to have a rest.”

  That’s actually true. I am absolutely exhausted, so at least this isn’t a total lie.

  “Are you allowed back home? What with all the evidence being there…”

  “The police said that I can. I think they have taken everything that they need. It might be a big mess though…”

  Urgh, I cannot think about that right now, it might crush me. It’s not that I care so much about my stuff being destroyed. It sucks, but at least I’m alive. I just don’t like the idea of the memories. It sends a shiver up and down my spine… yet, it’s still much less terrifying than the idea of facing Brad.

  “We will stay here,” Angelo replies. “You don’t need to worry about Brad being alone. But remember, I am here for you too. I can help you if you want me around. Anything…”

  “You’re a good person, Angelo. I appreciate that a lot. I will let you know.”

  We say our goodbyes and hang up the phone, before I turn to see the strange expression on Ruby’s face.

  “You don’t want to go and see Brad?” she asks. “That seems a little… weird.”

  “I just want to go home. To get my life back on track. To get my apartment back and to forget that this ever happened. I also want to get some sleep; I wasn’t lying about that. I’m shattered.”

  “Well, I will come with you,” Ruby insists. “I will help you tidy the place up.”

  I haven’t got the energy to argue with her, so I simply nod. I allow her to take me back home and check the place out, and as soon as we step inside, I’m glad. Despite the cops taking the evidence that they need, it’s a mess. It looks like a tornado has ripped through here which makes me weep seriously hard. I practically collapse at the state of it. Luckily, I have Ruby to lean against and I’m not by myself. She can hold me upright.

  “It’s okay, I’m here for you,” she shushes me. “We can get this done together, okay?”

  I nod and agree with her, but deep down I can feel something sliding over me. The realization of just how intense this is. This is the sort of shit from movies and books, not real life, and sure as hell not my life. Yet here I am, facing just this. My life in God damn danger because I fell in love with the wrong person.

  “There we are,” Ruby says quietly as she tucks me into bed like a child. “Are you okay?”

  “I think so.” My eyes blink hard. The sleepiness is really coming for me now. “I’m so exhausted though.”

  “I know, I know, you must be,” she coos sympathetically. “But at least we got your apartment done. I don’t think that you would be able to relax if you had to face that in the morning. If anyone needs sleep right now, it’s you.” She cocks her head to one side and gives me a curious look. “Are you sure you don’t want me to stay?”

  “No, no you don’t have to do that. You have already done so much for me. You need to get home.”

  She doesn’t like it; I know she doesn’t. Ruby is desperate not to let me be here alone, but I don’t want to start being looked after all the time. If Maria is never caught, then I can’t spend my whole life being paranoid. She would have to be seriously crazy to come back here again when the police are after her…

  “Please, Ruby, it’s fine. You don’t have to worry. I am going to be okay.”

  “I can just sleep on the couch, that’s all. It won’t be an issue.”

  “Ruby, I am fine. I’m just going to sleep, that’s all. I will call you as soon as I wake up in the morning. Then you can come and look after me then if you still want to.”

  “Maybe we will go to the hospital then?” she asks. “If I come with you?”

  My smile thins because I’m really not sure what to do with this. “Maybe. We’ll see how I feel.”

  “Of course. Whatever you want. I don’t want to push you into anything. I just want you to be happy.”

  I stare up at the ceiling, unsatisfied as she leaves, no longer quite so able to just drift off anymore. I need to work out just what I’m going to do with me and Brad. We could be a happy ever after, the potential is there, but if the rest of the world isn’t going to let us, then how can we keep fighting? It isn’t like this for other people. Ruby and Chelsea have it easy. It isn’t supposed to be this way.

  This needs to be the turning point of us. I need to really decide whether it’s worth carrying on fighting for us or if I want a normal life. If I chose against, I guess I will have to go for another job as well because I can’t remain working with him, but I will cross that bridge when I come to it.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Brad

  Hospitals are loud at night. That’s the one thing to really hit me. There is always a lot of activity going on. Almost as much as during the day. Nurses, milling about, doctors, chatting to patients, patients, suffering dramas… it’s damn near impossible to
get any sleep. All I can do is stare at the ceiling and wait. I don’t know what I’m waiting for really. Morning, to get out of here, for news? I don’t know.

  I huff with irritation. It’s claustrophobic in here. I want to be out in the world finding out what’s going on. I don’t know what is happening with Tami and that scares the shit out of me. But the doctors aren’t ready for me to leave right now. They say I am not quite stable enough for them to be sure.

  I sent all of my brothers away because their chattering was getting too much for me. I wanted some silence, but now the silence is too much for me. I need some noise to calm me the hell down. Why hasn’t Tami come in to see me yet? That’s what I find really troubling. There’s a reason for it. If it were the other way around, I would be absolutely desperate to see her. Nothing would keep me away.

  I turn on to my side and stare at the wall, just for a change of scenery. I think a nurse will be in to see me soon, so there isn’t any point in even trying to get to sleep now. I might as well just remain with my eyes open.

  “Brad?” A female whisper makes me jump. It could be a nurse, but they are more likely to call me Mr. Smith, so my mind immediately jumps elsewhere. It could be Tami, coming to see me at last. “You awake?”

  I turn over to the other side with a giant smile on my face, expecting to find myself looking at a beautiful blonde, but instead it’s a red head. The one red head I never want to see again.

  “Maria,” I hiss angrily while pushing myself in to a sitting position. I don’t like being vulnerable around her. It scares the living shit out of me. “What the fuck are you doing here? Aren’t the cops after you?”

  She smirks, proud of herself. “I’m too smart for the police. Haven’t you worked that out by now?”

  “Not really, since you have come here, basically to the scene of the crime.”

  She rolls her eyes and snorts. “There aren’t any crimes here, Brad. Just love.”

  “Are you seriously still saying this? You really think love looks like this? Give it up, Maria. In fact, I am pressing the call button right now and getting a nurse in here.”

  “You want someone else to wind up hurt?” Those words are the only things that can stop me. She has shown that she is more than capable of harming people who she considers in her way. “That’s what I thought. Now, I don’t want to be here talking about what happened or any other people, I am here to discuss me and you.” She perches on the edge of the bed. It takes everything that I have not to lash out and kick her. “What happened was regrettable, I have to admit that. I’m sorry for what happened at that girl’s apartment…”

  “Which part?” I interrupt coldly. “Stabbing me? Hurting Tami? Running away?”

  “Hurting you, of course. I don’t mind hurting that other chick because I didn’t do her any real damage and she needed to learn that so she can keep away from you, allowing us to be together. And I didn’t have any choice but to run away from the cops either. Otherwise they would have locked me up, just like you said. I don’t know how long they would put me in jail for and who knows how many skanks will come between me and you then?”

  Just as I’m about to give her some shit for acting like a crazy bitch again, she bursts into tears. Thick, sobbing tears like nothing I have ever seen from her before. I have seen the sultry version, the hard ass version, the stalker version… but no emotion like this. This is something else from Maria.

  “I just want to be with you, Brad, that’s all,” she bursts out. “That’s all I have wanted ever since that magical night we first met. I just… I want to be yours, that’s all. I keep trying and trying to show you that, but I can’t make it happen. You won’t seem to see what there is between us. Me and you… we’re destiny. We’re supposed to be special. I am your happy ever after. Not her, not any of the others.”

  “Maria, I feel a bit shitty saying this to you when you’re crying, but I have said it over and over again. Me and you aren’t anything. We never were and we certainly never will be. There isn’t anyone in our way.”

  “You!” she yells. “You are in our way. You are the problem.”

  I lean under the bed to try and reach for the call button to alert someone now. I’m not remaining stuck with this woman anymore. But before I manage to grab it, Maria notes what I’m doing, and she lurches towards me. She grabs my face in to her hands and stares intently in my eyes. Her gaze flashes with all kinds of emotions which leaves me very concerned. I’m in a position where she could really hurt me again.

  “If I could just get you out of your head, then you would see… you would finally understand that me and you are meant to be. That’s all this has been. Me trying to ensure that you’re getting out of your own way. This is happiness that I’m offering you. A real future. Marriage, babies, the lot. It could be incredible.”

  She tugs my face towards her and crashes her lips to mine, trying to seal my fate. Instantly, I’m so disgusted that I can’t even pretend to save my life. I snatch myself back and make a loud grossed out noise. Even though she still has hold of my face, I wipe her salvia off my face and give her a horror struck look.

  “Maria, what the fuck? You will not let it go, will you? You will not just leave me alone.”

  “You are completely obsessed with her, aren’t you?” Maria growls while taking a step back from me. Her expression is all twisted up and angry. “She is the one in our way. I tried to tell you.”

  “No one is in our way because we are not a thing. I keep telling you.”

  “We will be. I’m going to make sure there isn’t any other option for you than to be with me.”

  That’s a chilling and sinister comment if ever I have heard one. “What are you planning?”

  “It doesn’t matter to you what I’m planning. It isn’t like you’re going to be able to stop me from where you are. Look at the state of you. You’re completely stuck there. Pinned to the bed like a dog in a fucking cage.”

  “What are you doing?” I ask with more desperation this time. “What are you talking about?”

  She tosses her head back and laughs nastily. “Oh, wouldn’t you like to know, Brad?”

  “Yes. I would. That’s why I am asking you. I don’t want you to do anything stupid.”

  The smile that she gives me is too sinister for words. It’s freaky as hell, she looks like a doll in a horror movie or something. I almost want to throw up at the sight of her. My nose screws up in disgust, I can’t believe I ever hooked up with this woman. Her ugly insides now make her much less attractive to me.

  “Maria, just go to the police. Hand yourself in. Apologize for what you have done then they will help you. The best thing you can do is move on from this. That’s all any of us want.”

  “Oh, I will never be able to move on from this, and I’m going to make sure that you can’t either.” She nods frantically. “I will make sure that you are never able to forget me, Brad Smith.”

  “What are you talking about?” I yell after her as she heads towards the door. “Maria, what do you mean? You don’t think I am already completely unable to forget all of this? Are you kidding me?”

  Fuck. She’s gone. She’s left. Going to do whatever it is that she’s planning. And she’s right. There isn’t anything that I can do while I’m here stuck in this fucking bed. I need the help of someone else. Anyone. Right now, the only people I can get hold of are the medical staff working here. They might have enough going on, but this is serious. This is potentially life threatening. I lean down and find the button before pressing it frantically. My heart hammers in my chest as I wait impatiently for someone to join me.

  “Did you just see someone leave here?” I blurt out the moment a nurse comes in. “A red haired woman?”

  “Er no.” She furrows her eyebrows at me. “No one shouldn’t be in here at this time. Visiting hours are over.”

  “I know, but somehow she got in anyway. She was just here a moment ago. She threatened me and now she is threatening my girlfriend. The police ar
e looking for her, they need to find her, she is the one who put me in here.” This isn’t a nurse who I have seen before so I guess she might not know my story. “I need to stop her. Can I leave? If you take all of these needles out of me now, then I can chase after her and stop her.”

  “I really don’t think that’s a good idea…” the nurse offers unhelpfully. “You need to be in here…”

  “I know you don’t understand, but I can’t just let her go. Can you stop her? The police need her…”

  “I…” She glances behind her in shock. “I will go and see what I can do. Try and stop this woman.”

  I’m not reassured at all. “She has red hair and a white top on. The police need to know. This is serious.”

  “Okay, well I will call them. I will make sure they get here now if it’s that serious.”

  “Right, well make sure that they get here quickly. I don’t want her to escape again.”

  She nods and backs away from me, her eyes wide with shock. I think she assumes that I might have lost my damn mind. I kinda feel like I have with all of this. How can Maria have gotten to me twice and escaped it? It isn’t right. They are supposed to be looking for her, making sure that she is locked away. They should be here watching because it’s pretty damn obvious that she might come back to me. Or perhaps they thought that was too dumb too.

  “Fuck.” I grab on to my forehead, a brand new aching there. “Fucking hell. That’s just…”

  “Oh, I will never be able to move on from this, and I’m going to make sure that you can’t either.”

  Those are basically the words that Maria left me on which isn’t great. It doesn’t bode well for my family or Tami at all. And she is right about something else as well. I am stuck here, pinned to the bed like a fucking dog, unable to escape. She is out there doing whatever the hell she wants, and I can’t stop her. I want to scream, to yell, to fucking destroy everything. I want to do something, anything to stop this. But I can’t. I’m just stuck here waiting… waiting… and dying inside.