After Life

by Jacquie Underdown

  Asher laughed. “Good luck convincing Theron of that. I’d say he thinks himself already invested.”

  ◆◆◆

  An hour later, a quiet knock came at the door—so soft she wasn’t sure she had heard it at first.

  Zoe rushed to her feet and opened the door wide. Theron was standing there in the dimly lit hall. When he lifted his head and allowed a slice of dull light to illuminate his face, she saw the swollen eye and blood.

  “Holy shit,” she said, urging him inside. “Are you okay?” Zoe didn’t wait for him to answer, instead took his hand and called back to Asher to get some ice.

  She locked the door behind him. Gesturing toward the lounge, she said, “Take a seat.”

  Asher brought over ice cubes in a clip seal bag and a tea towel. Zoe took them from her, wrapped the ice, and handed it to Theron. “Put this on your eye.”

  He winced as he rested the ice pack against his red and blue stained flesh.

  “What happened?” she asked, sitting next to him. “Daniel?”

  Theron’s mouth twisted. “I still can’t believe what he did. What he did to you.” He turned his big frame, so he was looking at Zoe and stroked a finger down her cheek. “Are you okay?”

  She nodded quickly. “I’ll get over it.”

  He fluttered fingertips across her forehead, stroked the hair from her face. He was frowning as he held her gaze. “I’m so sorry he did that. I didn’t know. If I did, I would’ve stopped—”

  “I know that.” She knew that now, and she felt aggrieved to have ever doubted his intentions in the past.

  “Do you?”

  She nodded. “I do.”

  Theron shook his head and groaned angrily. “I still can’t believe Daniel did that… And Rhianna. What the hell were they thinking?”

  Zoe sighed. “I honestly think it’s Rhianna. She likes you. She was jealous of us…” She caught herself short and rephrased, “of our friendship.”

  Theron’s forehead wrinkled. “So she thought acting like a complete psychopath was going to make me want her?”

  “I think the point was to humiliate me. Make me look unwantable.”

  “What kind of sick, twisted person is she?”

  “I’m starting to wonder that myself.” She shuddered as memories from the hospital came back.

  Noticing, Theron frowned “I’m so sorry.”

  She shook her head and waved his apology away. It wasn’t his fault. If it wasn't for him, she’d still be tied to the tree with that …

  Goosebumps sprung up across her limbs just thinking about the spirit. If she thought Rhianna and Daniel were evil, they were adorable spring rabbits compared to that presence.

  Asher hovered near them. “Do you want another cup of tea, Zoe? Anything I can get for you, Theron?”

  “I’m right,” Zoe said.

  Theron inclined his head to Asher. “A couple of paracetamol would be nice. Daniel’s got a right hook like a motherfucker.”

  Zoe placed her hand on Theron’s forearm. “I’m so sorry he hurt you.”

  He laughed sardonically. “He’s in worse shape than me. He just happened to get the first punch in. And it was a good one, unfortunately.”

  Zoe gasped. “How much worse?”

  “It doesn’t matter.”

  “He’s not going to the headmistress … or the cops, is he?”

  Theron shook his head. “I doubt it. And like I said, he threw the first punch.”

  Zoe stood and shook the nervous energy from her hands. Anxiety sat heavy and solid in her belly. She knew the ramifications of any violence between students, regardless of who threw the first punch: Theron and Daniel would both be expelled.

  “I’m so so so sorry to drag you into my mess.”

  “Hey, hey,” Theron said, placing his ice pack down and standing. He held her hips, turning her to face him. With a gentle finger under her chin, he tilted her head up until her apologetic gaze met his. “You’re not dragging me into anything. I want to be in your life. I like you, Zoe. A lot. More than a friend. You hear me?”

  Zoe peered up at his face, her eyes flicking between his eyes and lips. She nodded slowly but didn’t understand why he would like her. Someone who had trouble follow her everywhere. Someone who had some seriously messed up stuff happening.

  But, in the end, why he had feelings for her didn’t matter. What mattered was that he did. And she liked him too. But, with the way her world was right now, he couldn’t be a part of it—not in the way they both wanted.

  “Despite Rhianna’s attempts, this doesn’t change the way I feel about you,” he said.

  “Here are your painkillers,” Asher said.

  Theron grabbed the glass of water Asher was holding out and the two paracetamol. He swallowed them down. “Thanks.”

  Zoe rested the glass on the coffee table. She held his arm and led him back to the couch. His eye had almost swollen shut. “Take a seat.” She sat beside him and eased the ice pack against his eye. “You need to keep this on unless you want to look like a freak show tomorrow.”

  Asher laughed. “I’d say, by the look of his eye, it’s going to be one hell of a shiner, icepack or not.”

  Theron managed a smile. “Sure feels that way.”

  Asher sat beside Zoe on the lounge and leaned forward, her elbows resting on her knees. “You were pretty freaked out there tonight, Zoe.”

  Zoe nodded but didn’t say anything, unsure if she were capable of speaking about it without losing her composure.

  “I’ve never seen someone that frightened. I thought you were going to rip your feet off.”

  Zoe glanced down at her ankles, rubbed raw from the rope.

  “I’m sure Zoe wants to forget tonight ever happened,” Theron said, words clipped. But when he looked at Zoe, his expression and tone softened. “Unless you want to talk about it. If that will make you feel better.”

  Zoe closed her eyes while she blew out a long breath. “I don’t know what would make me feel better. Talking, though, in my experience, only makes spirits stronger.”

  Asher sat up taller. “Spirits? So you did see something up there?” That excited energy Zoe was familiar with now emanated from Asher. Zoe couldn’t be angry with Asher for feeling that way about something Zoe, herself, perceived as torment. That was Asher. She loved the paranormal, the occult, and the unexplained.

  Zoe, living right in the middle of that hell, abhorred it.

  She longed for one normal day.

  Just one.

  Zoe nodded slowly. “But I’m scared I’ll make the spirit stronger.”

  Theron placed his hand on her knee, his face moving closer to hers. “That’s what happens? They get stronger when you talk about them?”

  “When I talk about them or to them, when I look at them or think about them.”

  Theron frowned. “That’s why you were reluctant with Barkley.” Not a question, purely a statement of fact.

  Again she nodded.

  “Was this spirit at the hospital particularly bad?” Asher asked.

  “The worst I’ve ever felt. But I’m not saying anymore. I’ve already said enough. It knew I could sense it. It knew.” She gripped her fingers, trying to ease the tremble that had found its way to her hands.

  “You don’t have to say anymore.” Warning, directed at Asher, sat beneath Theron’s words.

  Asher went to stand but sighed instead. Running a hand through her black strands, she said, “Just one more thing.”

  Zoe felt Theron tense. His breathing grew heavier, but he didn’t stop Asher from continuing.

  “If confronting them—touching them, from what we saw happen with Barkley and your grandmother—gets rid of them, maybe that’s what you should do. No matter how scary they are. Wouldn’t that be the best outcome, rather than having them stay in your life?”

  “No. No. You don’t know what I’m dealing with at that hospital.” Zoe wrapped her arms around herself to stop the chill creeping over her flesh. “This is
not an eight-year-old boy or my loving nan. It was dangerous. I could feel it. Pure sin.”

  Asher stood taller, each movement fluttery. It seemed the more frightened Zoe became, the more enthusiastic Asher got. “But how harmful can an incorporeal entity be?”

  “Have you not seen Paranormal Activity? Or The Exorcist?” Theron demanded.

  Asher sat again on the couch. “They’re movies. I’ve been talking with people online who have experiences like this…I’ve been studying this since I was thirteen—”

  “Studying is not living it. Having a stupid fucking website about ghosts doesn’t mean anything. Zoe has lived this. I saw the interaction with my brother with my own eyes. You’ve not seen shit—”

  “I’ve seen more than you’d know,” Asher said, staring hard at Theron.

  Zoe’s arms sprung out, and she held both of their arms, as though the gesture would shush them as well as keep them apart.

  Asher sighed. “The last thing I want is for Zoe to get hurt. But I truly don’t think she will.”

  “Perhaps not physically, but there are other ways to be traumatised.”

  Zoe released her grip on them both. “I’m not confronting that spirit, Asher. No way. It’s bad enough I spent time with it already.”

  “Wouldn’t it be better to get rid of it? Theron and I could go with you. I’d like to record it. It may be a way of understanding more about what is happening with you.”

  Theron fell quiet.

  Zoe peered at Asher. She had a point. Perhaps confronting this spirit, and Asher using whatever tools she owned to record the interaction, may help them understand not only the paranormal more but also why Zoe could see ghosts.

  Deep down, second behind having this curse leave her completely, she wanted to know what was going on.

  But, if she had any say in matters, she was never going near that thing at the hospital again.

  “I see your point, Asher. I truly do. But I don’t have the courage to face that thing. My body and mind shut down even thinking about going back there. I’m not sure you understand what I felt up there, but I never want to experience that again.”

  Asher nodded, but disappointment was evident in her frown.

  “I’m sorry. I know you’ve lived your life for an opportunity like this, but I can’t.”

  She nodded again. “I get it. If I could see what you see, then, perhaps, I’d be reluctant too.”

  “You would be.”

  Asher tensed a smile. “Okay. No more pestering.”

  Zoe smiled back.

  “Well, I might head off to bed,” Asher said. “You don’t need anything before I go?”

  “No. I should be okay. Thanks.”

  She said goodnight and went to her room.

  Theron leaned over and kissed Zoe on her cheek. She soaked in his lingering heat and breathed in his closeness. “I better get going too.” His words held a certain meaning while his unstated intentions said quite another thing altogether.

  Zoe didn’t want him to go, but she made herself nod. It hurt her heart to do so, but as much as she liked Theron, she wasn’t that selfish as to ruin his life too. It was bad enough that her parents and brothers already suffered because of her.

  He met her gaze, speaking another unspoken desire.

  She glanced at her watch, groaned and rolled her eyes. “Would it be a risk sneaking out now or would it be safer in the morning—

  He shook his head. “I think it would be better if I—”

  “Stay,” she said.

  He arched a brow. “Are you sure?”

  She nodded.

  He patted the lounge. “I’ll sleep here. On the couch.”

  “No.”

  “No?”

  She shook her head, then looked away quickly, unable to meet his eyes. Afraid of what she might say if she did.

  Chapter 18

  Theron had spent the night in Zoe’s bed before. But that was before their feelings had matured or they had confessed said feelings to one another.

  How silly would it be, though, to now make him sleep on the couch? She was seventeen, not quite an adult, but also not an immature kid who couldn’t control herself. Yes, even when summoning that self-control would be the hardest thing in the world for her to do.

  And besides all that, she was not going to lead Theron into her trap of misery. She liked him too much for that. And wasn’t that the most completely frustrating, ridiculous part of all this?

  Zoe sat up in bed, crossing her legs under her when Theron entered the room.

  He smiled as best he could, considering half his face was bruised, swollen, and he was in obvious pain.

  Damn Daniel.

  “Can you please flick that main light off?”

  He flicked the switch leaving only the bedside lamp to illuminate the room in a warmer, subtler light, then climbed into bed. He lay back against the pillows with a gratified sigh as though the bed was the one and only need his body had at this moment.

  She understood—tonight had been tough. For all of them. She owed Theron and Asher so much.

  Unlike Zoe, Theron was a picture of ease, his hands clasped behind his head, chest rising and falling rhythmically. No tension emanated from him, even after all the drama. Not that the nervous energy rushing through Zoe’s limbs was because of anything that happened tonight, but rather because she had a gorgeous guy in her bed.

  Theron patted the space beside him. “Lie down.”

  She strained a smile while she stretched the nervous energy from her legs and rested back on her pillows. He rolled on his side to face her. She copied.

  “You’ve had a rough week.”

  Zoe grimaced. “Understatement of the century.”

  Theron chuckled quietly. “I was trying to be positive.”

  Zoe thought about the past week, starting with Nan, which made her heart beat out a hollow, aching rhythm. She missed her so much. How was she going to navigate her life now that Nan was gone?

  A tear spilled onto her cheek. Theron frowned and wiped the tear gently with his thumb.

  “My parents aren’t who they say they are. They are the two people in the world I rely on for the truth, and they’ve lied to me my entire life. Now everything else feels shaky. Like I don’t quite know what’s real anymore.” Another tear slid down her cheek.

  “Do they love you?”

  Zoe nodded. She couldn’t doubt that they loved her. All the hovering, her admission to hospital, checking up on her, was all because they loved her.

  “Love is the most real thing in the world,” Theron said. “If you have that, you don’t need anything else. You don’t need their blood to be the same as yours, or a piece of paper showing they’re your parents. They love you.”

  Zoe sighed, managed a watery smile. “And I love them too.”

  Theron stroked the tears from her cheeks and kissed the tip of her nose. “Then that’s all that matters. I’ve not told you, but I’ve lived with my aunt since I was eleven. Mum…well, she couldn’t stand the sight of me.”

  Groaning, Zoe scrubbed her hands over her face. How unbelievably horrible for him.

  “My aunt, she’s not my biological mother, but she has been more of a mum than my real one. She loves me. She raised me. To me, that’s all that matters. To you, that’s all that should matter too.”

  “I understand that. I think I’m just confused about who I am. Not because I don’t know who my real parents are but because of all this other business as well. I can’t decide what’s real or if I’m going insane.”

  Theron gripped her hand and pressed it to his chest. Her fingers rested against hard muscle and warmth. Beneath her palm, his heart beat steadily. “I’m real, Zoe. Remember that when nothing else feels as though it is.”

  Yes, he was real. The most real experience she had had for years—the way he made her feel, the emotions he conjured inside her. And being so close to him now, feeling his heart under her hand and his breath on her face, seeing the emotion in his
green eyes, made her realise she was falling fast for him.

  Her gaze dropped to his lips. She ached for him to kiss her again like he did that first night when she thought she had a chance at leading a normal life.

  Why couldn’t she be ordinary, so she could allow this wonderful, amazing guy into her life in all the ways her heart and body ached for?

  Theron pressed his face closer and kissed her cheek. “Goodnight.”

  She smiled. “Goodnight.”

  She yearned not to, but she forced herself to turn the lamp off and search for sleep.

  ◆◆◆

  Theron’s warmth seeped into Zoe’s dreams. It woke her—the bliss of his heat nestled against her. She rolled to face him, finding him already awake and smiling.

  “Good morning,” he said in a hoarse voice.

  She smiled too because his mouth was undeniably the best thing she’d ever woken to. “Good morning.” But her attention soon drifted to his eye—still swollen, and the black bruising had deepened.

  “Ouch,” she said, fluttering her fingers across his temple. “How do you feel?”

  “A couple of paracetamol would be welcomed.”

  Zoe shuffled away to grab her mobile from the bedside table. She checked the time—mid-morning. She should have known by the bright orange glow streaming in from behind the window blinds.

  With Theron beside her all night, she slept better than she had in her memory.

  “Come-on. I’ll make us a drink and find you some painkillers.”

  Asher was already awake or, by the looks of her, she hadn’t gone to bed. She was at the study nook, which was huddled behind a bookshelf between the lounge and the kitchenette.

  “Morning,” Zoe said as she passed, Theron trailing behind her.

  She spun quickly. “Oh, hey. You’re awake. How’d you sleep?”

  “Good. You?”

  “Haven’t.”

  Zoe crumpled her brow. “Um. Okay. Do we have any more paracetamol?”

  Asher’s gaze flickered to Theron, and she winced. “That eye looks sore. And you say Daniel’s in worse shape? I’d hate to see his face this morning.” She pointed to the small cabinet in the tinier kitchenette. “There’s some tablets in there.”