Jardin's Gamble (Haven, Texas Book 9)
Page 15
Scary. Intriguing. Safe.
She’d bet anyone he cared about was kept under close watch. Jardin was an intense guy. Having all his focus on her might be almost too much. She wasn’t sure she was strong enough to take it. Not without someone else to even him out.
What? Like Carrick?
Okay, ever since he’d mentioned the fact they’d been in a relationship before with someone else, she hadn’t been able to think of anything else.
What would it be like to be theirs?
“What exactly are you sorry for?” he asked in that low drawl of his.
She wished she could get up and leave. Escape. But she owed this to him. An explanation. Of sorts. Because she couldn’t exactly tell him everything.
“I’m sorry I didn’t help you after promising to. And for ignoring your calls and text messages.”
He nodded. “You’re forgiven on one condition.”
“What’s that?
“You tell me why.”
Fuck a duck. She couldn’t tell him the truth. She licked her dry lips. “I have a lot going on in my life. This job and my brothers take up all my time. I didn’t think it was fair to you to continue things when I couldn’t give you much.”
There. That sounded plausible.
“I understand.”
She nearly heaved out a sigh of relief.
“Too bad I don’t believe a word of it.”
Fuck. Shit.
She gaped at him. “What do you mean? It’s the truth.”
“Oh, I’m sure your job and brothers take a lot of your time. Can’t be easy to be a sole parent to two young boys because your father is a useless prick. However, if that were the reason you ghosted me, you would have just told me. Likely you wouldn’t have come on that date with me in the first place. Or offered to help me with my mess of an office. Now, I thought maybe I’d done something to scare you off. But, again, you would have given me a reason. No, I think something else entirely happened to you. What aren’t you telling me, Thea?”
“There’s nothing else. You’re imagining things. I simply don’t want a relationship with you. I’m not interested.”
He snorted out a laugh. “Now you are getting desperate for excuses. I know it’s definitely not that by the way you reacted to me.” He leaned forward. “And just so you know, once we’re in a relationship together, you’re getting your butt spanked for all the lying. If you’re lucky, I’ll do it. If you’re unlucky, he will.”
Carrick nodded over to Jardin’s office.
Her pulse raced. She should have been outraged at his words. Definitely should have gotten up and told him the conversation was over. Instead she sat there, stunned, her clit throbbing at the thought of being spanked by them both.
You’ve got problems, Thea.
This is all Maddox’s fault. He started her thinking about ménages and spanking and . . . shit. She’d gone too long without saying something and the look on Carrick’s face could only be described as smug.
“You can’t threaten to spank me!”
“Not the first time I have.”
“No . . . but . . .” Back then she’d thought there was a chance for them.
“You know much about BDSM, Thea?” Carrick asked, studying her closely. As though he could read all her secrets.
Holy. Shit.
“A bit,” she rasped. “Are you saying that you’re a . . .”
“Dom? Yeah, I am. Although there are times I enjoy a bit of pain too. So maybe I’m more of a switch. Although, I don’t think I could bottom for anyone except the man in there. Just like I’m the only man for him.”
“You and he are . . .”
“Together. Yep. It’s still new but we know each other well. It fits. You just know when it works, right?”
She nodded. She wouldn’t know.
“You ever played?”
“I’m not a-a submissive or a Domme.”
“Rocket, I know you’re not a Domme. But you could enjoy submitting. To the right person. You certainly enjoy the idea of being spanked.”
Earth swallow me up now.
“We shouldn’t be talking about this,” she whispered. Her nipples had hardened to points and her panties were getting wet with how turned on she was. “He’s my boss and you’re—”
“A friend. A friend who’s attracted to you and who wants to get to know you better. Who’s worried about you.” The sincerity in his face struck her hard.
“You don’t need to worry about me. You shouldn’t. Yesterday—”
“Yesterday, I overreacted. Felt like I’d gotten the dirty end of the stick. But I have to say, I’ve never been more grateful for having to meet with my accountant.”
“Because of Jardin?”
“And you.”
“You seemed to think that I’d . . . that he and I . . . I didn’t know who you were!”
“I know, rocket. Jardin and I have a past. One where we both made mistakes and got hurt. I’m sorry for scaring you yesterday. I’m sorrier for hurting you. How’s your wrist?”
She looked down at her wrist, trying to figure out what he was talking about. Oh, right, when he’d grabbed her.
“Can I have a look at it, please?”
“It’s fine,” she dismissed. “It had a bruise from the other day. Banged it while I was doing some stuff around the house. That’s all.”
“Then there’s no reason I can’t check it. It would make me feel better.”
“Maybe you should go wait in Jardin’s office.”
“And disturb the bear while he’s working? I don’t think so.”
“I have a lot of work to do.”
“And I’m interrupting.”
She gave an abrupt nod and expected him to move away. Instead he leaned back in his chair to study her. “Jardin told you we used to share a woman?”
“I’m not sure how this is any of my business.” Hadn’t he shared enough personal information? She was already reeling over the fact that both he and Jardin were into BDSM, that they were Doms. Well, Carrick might be a switch. Holy. Shit.
If things were different, she might be all over that. She’d always been curious. One of her past sexual partners had been willing to get a bit kinky in the bedroom. She’d loved being restrained. She wasn’t so sure about all the protocol stuff though.
“You’re not? Huh, he really did make a mess of things this morning.”
“What?” she asked.
“Jardin and I used to be best friends,” he continued on as though she hadn’t spoken. “We shared a partner, Sally. I thought she wanted us both. Also thought that sharing her was the only way I could be close to Jardin.”
“You mean the two of you weren’t—” she broke off with a blush. “Sorry, that’s none of my business.”
“You can ask as many questions as you like, rocket. I brought this up. Nothing’s off-limits to you.”
Was he serious? Why would he want to talk to her about it? She was nothing to either of them. It was so confusing.
“We weren’t together like that back then. I came out as bisexual years ago. I would have told you that, had our relationship gone beyond one date.”
Shame flooded her.
“Does that worry you?” he asked, his face shutting down.
She frowned slightly. “Should it?”
He shrugged. “Lots of people don’t get it. I’ve had partners who were intimidated by it for some reason. Had a fallout with my family over it. They wanted me to pick a side.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah and they wanted me to pick the female side. I refused. Haven’t spoken to them in close to eighteen years.”
That was so sad.
“I’m so sorry.”
“Truth is, rocket, I’m better off without them. I met Jardin about seven years later. I was attracted to him, but he was my closest friend and he wasn’t bi or gay. Or at least I didn’t think he was. We were best friends for years before we met Sally, and she got involved with both of us. I
thought she wanted both of us. Turns out, she just wanted to be the next Mrs. Jardin Malone. In the beginning I think she got off on having two dicks to lead around. Course, nobody leads Jardin around. He’s a workaholic, and I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how, uh, abrupt and arrogant he can be.”
She actually smiled at that description.
“Sally wasn’t enamored of the fact he wasn’t willing to kiss the ground she walked on, so she tried to get me to be her little slave. I wasn’t going for that either. Things started to unravel for the three of us. I knew she didn’t want me. I felt like a third wheel. I never told Jardin though and that’s on me. Thought I’d lose him to her. Turns out, he was starting to see her true colors. The drinking. The bitching. The way she treated me. He confronted her, told her it was over. That night she drank too much and drowned.”
“Oh, God.”
“I was at home. I should have been watching her. I had the music up loud. I was avoiding her. Was just sitting there while she drowned.”
“Oh, Carrick, you couldn’t have known.” She got up and walked around to his chair, kneeling on the floor in front of him. She reached up and took his hand in hers. “It wasn’t anyone’s fault.”
“I blamed him, though,” a deep voice said from the doorway. She started, her eyes rising to Jardin, who had his hands in his pockets as he leaned against the frame. His gaze was intense as he looked down at her. “I was an idiot and lashed out, said things I didn’t mean. And I lost him for two years.”
“And now you’ve found each other again.” That was so romantic.
“Finally got the chance to tell Carrick how I feel about him. How I’ve always felt about him.”
“You left it so long . . .” she trailed off, hoping Jardin didn’t see that as a criticism.
“I was an idiot. When I tracked him down, I saw him with someone and thought he was happy.”
“Short story is, I wasn’t happy,” Carrick told her. “And now I know that Jardin has the same feelings for me as I do for him.”
The way they stared at each other made her heart hurt. She wished she had that. Desperately.
“So now you have a happy ever after.”
“Not yet. But we’re planning on getting there,” Jardin told her. “Just need to find the perfect third.”
“You want a ménage again?”
Shit. Should she really ask something so personal? But why were they telling her?
“This is probably not a conversation we should be having.” She quickly stood and Carrick stood as well.
“Not here, no,” Jardin agreed. “Would you like to come to dinner with us, Thea?”
He wanted her to go to dinner with them? Why? Not that she could, but they didn’t mean they wanted her to be their third?
She shook off the thought as ridiculous.
Yeah? Then why was Carrick talking to you about BDSM? About being a sub? Why did he watch you with hungry eyes?
But what about Jardin? He was harder to read.
“I can’t. I have to pick up the boys,” she said quickly.
“Can you arrange a babysitter for this weekend? Maybe we could take you out to dinner on Friday night?” Carrick asked. “Then we could be on our own.”
“And you can tell us what’s going on with you,” Jardin told her.
Oh. So that’s why they wanted to get her alone. They wanted to know what was going on with her.
Disappointment flooded her.
You’re an idiot, Thea.
Well, that wasn’t happening.
“I don’t . . . I’m not sure why you’re asking me out to dinner. But I’m really sorry . . . I can’t . . . I have to go,” she said abruptly.
She walked around her desk to grab her handbag.
“Thea, wait,” Carrick said.
“I’m really sorry for the way I treated you,” she said hastily. “I hope you two will be happy.”
Jardin scowled. “Thea, what—”
She raced out of the room before either of them could detain her. And although Jardin’s voice was filled with clear command when he told her to stop, she paid him no heed.
It was better this way. She could have agreed to dinner, knowing she wouldn’t turn up but that didn’t feel right. And she couldn’t tell them what was going on without endangering them as well.
No, getting away was the right option.
* * *
Carrick ran his hand down his face. “Shit.”
“I should have stayed in my office.”
He looked over at Jardin and shook his head. “Not your fault. She wasn’t gonna open up to me.”
“I pushed too hard with the dinner suggestion.” Jardin looked unsure. It wasn’t a usual look for him.
“Not sure how we’re going to get her to open up to us when she won’t even give us a few hours of time,” Carrick said with frustration.
“We’ll get to her,” Jardin said. “Even if we have to kidnap her.”
“Finally some decent food.” Maddox stared at the burger on his plate like it was a gold nugget.
Carrick had to grin. Maddox Malone was just as he remembered him. Outspoken, outrageous and funny as hell.
Maddox picked up the burger and took a huge bite. “Yeah, this is the shit.” He didn’t bother to swallow before he spoke.
Jardin sighed, grimacing.
They’d ended up at a steak house for dinner. Not somewhere Jardin would usually eat and he looked out of place in his suit. Not that he seemed to care.
“Could you swallow before you speak?” Jardin said coolly, cutting up his steak.
“Hmm, nope. I’m starving. Jeeves hates me.”
“His name is Gerald not Jeeves.”
Maddox took a few gulps of beer then flagged down the waitress. “Another beer thanks, darlin’.”
The waitress smiled at him, leaning over him to grab the extra glass. “Sure thing, sweetie.”
Carrick shook his head as Maddox watched her walk away. “You haven’t changed.”
Maddox grinned. “Sure as shit hope not.”
“So what did you want to talk to me about?” Jardin asked after the waitress brought back a new beer for Maddox.
“Oh, now he wants to talk.”
“Maddox,” Jardin said warningly.
“How is that cute PA of yours?” Maddox asked slyly.
Jardin tapped his fingers on the table, clearly losing his patience. “We’re not here to discuss Thea.”
“Sore spot, is she?”
“Maddox, you came to me for help. This is not the way to get it. You guys have never wanted me to visit before so why are you in an all-fire hurry to get me there nos?”
Maddox placed his hand over his chest dramatically. “Jardin, you wound me. You’re family. Our house is your house.”
“Right, that’s why Tanner takes great joy in using my car as target practice.”
“Well, now, that’s just our way of saying we care.”
Jardin let out a breath. “What do you want?”
A serious look crossed Maddox’s face, surprising Carrick. “There’s this big corporate company. They’ve been trying to buy up some land in Haven. They’re putting pressure on a number of locals. They want to build a big ugly strip mall. We need to stop them. And we need your help.”
Jardin pinched the top of his nose. “You do realize I’m a family lawyer. This isn’t my area of expertise.”
“So you won’t help.”
Jardin shared a look with Carrick. “I didn’t say that. I’ll look into it. I can probably come to Haven in about a week’s time.”
“Awesome. Make sure you bring Thea with you. She might like the place so much that she’ll stay.”
Jardin shot him a quelling look.
“What? She’d fit in well in Haven. Somebody would snatch her up real quick.”
Both Carrick and Jardin glared at Maddox. He just grinned. “Like that, is it?”
“Thea is ours,” Jardin told him.
Maddox hit hi
s cousin on the back. “Congratulations on pulling your head out of your ass, cousin. Isn’t the air fresher out here?”
Jardin just groaned.
Yep, Maddox hadn’t changed one bit.
18
Thea wasn’t really listening to her brothers as she drove up into the driveway. She’d picked them up after soccer practice.
Maybe she shouldn’t have run away from Carrick and Jardin like she had.
Had she made a mistake? Perhaps she should have told them what was going on. But, no, she couldn’t risk something happening to Keir and Ace if she said something. This was her problem to solve.
Fuck. Shit. She was so scared.
“Why’s the door open?” Ace asked, interrupting her thoughts.
“Did you forget to lock it, Thea?” Keir glared at her. God, he was nine going on fifty.
“No, I didn’t forget to lock it.” She frowned as she viewed the open door. It looked fine. No signs of forced entry.
“Do you think Dad’s here?” Ace whispered.
“Why don’t the two of you leave your bags and go see Diego?” she suggested.
Ace gave a happy grin. Always so carefree and innocent. She wanted him to stay that way for as long as possible.
Keir scowled again. “We should stay with you.”
“I’ll be fine.” Her pulse pounded. Was it her father? Wasn’t he with Silvers? But if not him then who? “Go on, leave your bags.”
Keir hesitated again.
“Keir. Go.” She gave him a firm look.
“Fine,” he muttered. “But he better not hurt you again.”
Ace’s smile faltered.
“Keir,” she warned.
“Come on, Ace, let’s go.” Keir tugged his brother away and Thea took a deep breath. She opened the door cautiously. The inside was as dark and dingy as usual.
But there was an air of evil that was new.
Jesus, Thea. Your imagination is working overtime.
Then she saw him, standing in the middle of the room.
Unfortunately, not her imagination then.
“Mr. Silvers.”
“Now, now, my dear. I rather think we’re on a first-name basis now, don’t you?” he said in that oily voice. “Call me Derrick, I insist.”