by Blair Young
“Screw off, Molly,” I shot back. “He was the one who pushed himself on me, if you must know, and I wasn’t the one to go to the police about it anyway. Someone else did that. Now, you can think what you want, but I’ve got better things to do than try to explain to you or anyone else why I’m innocent.”
“You’re not innocent, you’re a whore,” Molly remarked in her snide tone. I nearly threw my fist right in her face. Few things made me angrier than when someone called me such a thing, and she knew it. I wasn’t a whore, and I hated it when she would take such a low blow.
To make matters worse, I knew she did it just because she knew how much it hurt me when she did. Whether she really thought I was lying or not, the fact of the matter remained the same. She knew that it hurt me, and she had done it just to make me mad.
And it worked. The impulse to fight her rose quickly, but I fought it back down. I used every ounce of self control I had in my body not to go after her and tell her just what I really felt about the entire situation – including her and her bogus apology.
She wasn’t sorry for what she had done to me before, and the fact that she was so quick to buy into the rumors now and come at me like that showed that she didn’t change one bit.
And I wanted to prove to her that I had. I wasn’t going to just sit back and take her abuse of me anymore. But then, I thought once more about the bigger and better things I wanted to move on toward. I didn’t want to get in another fight with Molly for the pure and simple fact I knew it would almost certainly end in another suspension for me.
And, the fact of the matter was, I didn’t want that to hurt my college endeavors. It had nothing to do with Molly herself, it had nothing to do with the fact that I really wanted to put her back in her place, and it had nothing to do with what Susan or Dean would think.
But, I didn’t want to do anything to her that would make it harder for me to get into Harvard when I started filling out applications and asking for letters of recommendation from the teachers. No, I could put up with Molly and her crap for a few more months. It would be just a short while in the big picture.
I’d get past her, and I would move on. I would move on from all of this, and I would rise to the top. Molly might have privilege on her side, but I was determined to make something out of my life. I didn’t care how popular I was, all I cared about was the fact that I wanted to be someone.
And I would. Let her and the rest of the kids say what they wanted, speculate however much they wanted, and do what they wanted, I was going to stand my ground, refuse to get angry, and just keep my head low as I got through the rest of the year.
Let them watch me succeed and realize they were the idiots who tried to hold me back all along. It wasn’t going to work. I would move on from this, all of this, and I would make something of myself.
I’d show them. I’d show them all.
Chapter 20
Damon
I punched the air a few times, breathing along with the motion of my swings. I was eager to get through the night, get over with the fight, and move on with my life.
My debtors had tried to tell me that this wasn’t going to be the last, and there would be yet another when I was done with this one, but I was over it. I had gone the calculations in my mind, on paper, and in every way that I could spin the situation, and the fact of the matter was that I paid them back with the last fight, and the interest that they slapped onto the loan was more than they said it would be.
But, this time, I would finish strong, and I would give them all that they wanted – and that was the end. I wasn’t going to keep going back for more and more. And I wasn’t going to keep letting them control me. I was done with this life, and I was ready to start thinking seriously about the future.
I liked Massachusetts, and the fact that Sutton was so happy with the college was even greater motivation to move forward and see where life would take us. I wanted to get out of Secret Bay, and after what happened with Chad at school, I wanted more than ever to prove to her that I was really on her side.
I wasn’t going to let the other kids bully her over and of this, and I didn’t want her to ever feel like she was alone. I was there for her, and I would stay by her side through everything, no matter what. I would be there.
A knock at my door brought my attention back to the moment, and I took a deep breath. I hoped it would be Sutton in the hall, but I had a feeling it would be Susan. She knew that the last fight I had was supposed to be the very last of them all, and I knew it was going to turn into another argument when she saw I was getting ready to do it again.
But, this time was the last time, and I could deal with one more argument if it meant that I never had to do it again. She made it clear more than once she wasn’t happy with this career path I’d chosen, and I respected her opinion, but like so many other things in my life, I was going to make my own decisions and do what I felt was right.
I pulled open the door, surprised to see it was actually Dean in the hall.
“You have a fight tonight?” he asked in surprise. “I thought you were done with that?”
“I was, but I guess there’s another thing I have to do before I’m really done,” I said. “What’s up?”
He and I hadn’t been spending nearly as much time together since he and Susan were fighting so much. Though I wasn’t particularly close to Susan, I hated the tension that was in the house, and I knew Sutton really hated all the fights that went on.
“I just came to tell you how proud I am over what you did,” he said. “I heard about what happened to Chad, and you should know that you did the right thing. I know it wasn’t easy for you to go through with making the report, but there’s times in life when you have to do the harder thing to do the right thing, and this was one of those times.”
“I’m not really happy with how it all turned out, to be honest,” I said. “I don’t think it was handled properly.”
“Well, there are some things that are out of our control, and I know you did the right thing as far as what you could handle. I mean, this was a crime, and it was serious. Like I said, who knows how far it could have gotten out of hand if you didn’t nip it right in the bud where it was now?” Dean said. “You could have saved a lot of other women from going through the same thing.”
Somehow, I didn’t get the impression he was worried about Sutton, or doing the right thing. In fact, I got the stronger impression Dean was more hoping that this would drive me and Sutton apart. He knew that we had dated briefly before, but that Susan had made us break up. It was one of the biggest things that brought him and I back together after he’d moved out of the house.
We had bonded over the fact that he had managed to win back Susan, and I had managed to get Sutton back in my life. But, I knew there was an underlying tension to his and Sutton’s relationship, and I knew that he wouldn’t be disappointed if the two of us broke up again.
It didn’t help that Susan was doing everything she could to get on Sutton’s good side, or that she was arguing with Dean about many of the things that would really help Sutton out. But, I wasn’t going to get in the middle of that. I supported Sutton, and I was glad Susan wanted to help her get a good start in life.
And, for as much as I respected Dean as a father figure in my own life, the fact of the matter was that he wasn’t my real father, and the more I found out about his shadiness and the way he treated both Susan and Sutton, the less respect I had for him myself.
I didn’t want to look up to someone who was always fighting with their life partner, and though Susan wasn’t his wife, there were times when I thought they were going to get married. But, he treated her more and more like she was nothing more than just a maid in the house, meant to keep things going, pay most of the bills, and take care of him and me and Sutton. Though I tried to stay out of their arguments as much as possible, I didn’t like the way he was treating her.
And Sutton really hated it.
“Well, it’s over now, and
I really don’t plan to get involved in any more of what goes down with Chad,” I said. “I did my part, now I want to just stay out of it and let the law handle it the best way they think it needs to be handled.”
“That’s smart,” Dean said with a nod. He sat on the side of my bed, but I really just wanted him to leave. “And I think it would be smart of you to start thinking seriously about your own future. Think about what you want to do with your life, and who you want to spend your time with. You’ve been through a lot here in high school, but I think it’s time you seriously think about how these people are going to affect your life in the long run.”
“I don’t plan on being friends with most of the people who are still in school now,” I said with a shrug. “Don’t worry about that.”
Dean smiled. “You might benefit greatly from a clean start. Some people are more trouble than what they’re worth.”
He rose from the bed and gave me another squeeze on the shoulder. “But I’m really proud of you, and I know you’re going to make the right decision.”
Before I had the chance to reply, he walked back out of the room, pulling the door closed behind him. Somehow, the conversation left a bad taste in my mouth. He might have been in there to tell me he thought I’d done the right thing, but I got the impression he was insinuating that I should break up with Sutton.
And that made me mad. Sutton was the best thing that had ever happened to me, and I had no intention of ever breaking up with her. I would do anything to see her happy, and I meant it.
But, I couldn’t worry about that right now. Right now, I had to get down to the sports bar. The crowd would already be gathered, and they would be waiting for the fight.
And it was a fight I knew I’d win.
Although the last fight hadn’t gone well, this one was much easier. Perhaps it was the fact that I let loose all the anger that had built up in my body since the last fight. All the frustration and tension that I felt over so much of my life came bursting forth, and I had my opponent on the ground in a heartbeat.
The ref had to step in to make sure I didn’t take things too far, but I felt good. He didn’t get up quickly, and even if the ref hadn’t stepped in, I had a feeling the fight was all but over. The ref held my hand high in victory, and I looked over the crowd.
Part of me wished that Sutton was there to see my last victory. But then, I knew she was eager for me to get out of this life, and after she had been accosted by my debtors on the beach, she really didn’t want to come anywhere near the ring or where they could be lurking.
It was another reason I was so angry, which might have led to me winning the fight. But, whatever the reason, I was glad when it was finally done, and I was even happier when I had the money in my hand. So many people were betting on me these days, I wondered what the payout would be to the person who actually beat me.
If that were to ever happen, that is.
Now that I was done with the fighting, I was essentially quitting while I was ahead. I would be forever talked about around the basement of Louie’s as the champion who rose to the top and walked away before I could fall. And I was okay with that.
I headed to the bathroom to clean up and wrap my cuts as best I could, then I immediately went to find the debtors. I didn’t want to deal with them at all, so I planned on keeping the whole thing as short and blunt as possible.
The three of them were in the alley, just as I thought they would be. Jace, the spokesman for the three, had a cigarette in his hand.
“You cheated,” he said when I slapped the envelope in his hand. “I watched the whole thing, and you cheated.”
“I didn’t,” I said. “That was a fair win in front of everyone. Here’s your money. Now get out of my face.”
“Not so fast,” Jace said. “You still owe us.”
“Nice try,” I said with a laugh. I pulled out another piece of paper from the pocket of my jeans and slapped that into his hand as well. “You’ll see all the records of the payments, what I owed in the first place, and even this extra that you’ve put on me. I’m done with this fighting, and I’m not going to deal with any of you anymore. You got your money, and that’s the end of it.”
Jace laughed, and I bristled. “If you want to put me to the test, then you and I can go at this now. Man to man. You saw what I can do in there. Do you really think I cheated? Then let’s have it!”
I’d never challenged him like that before, but his face changed. I could see that he was angry enough he wanted to get in a fight with me, but he knew better. I was the fighter, not him, and even with his two cronies at his back, I could do a lot of damage even if they did end up getting the best of me.
“Get out of here, Loser,” he said. “I’m done with you.”
“That’s all I wanted to hear,” I smirked. I slung my bag over my shoulder and shoved my hands in my pockets, turning and walking up the alley with a quiet whistle emitting from my lips. I was done with them. I was done with all of them, and I didn’t care if Jace called me a loser now.
I wanted nothing more to do with them, and I didn’t want them to come anywhere near me or Sutton ever again. Now that they had their money, they could go on and find some other guy to make their slave for a couple years. But, I was free, and I intended to stay that way.
I was almost done with school, and I would be leaving this town with Sutton. We’d be gone for good, and I was already looking forward to it more than I could say. It was the best feeling in the world to know that I never had to do another fight.
It was over. I was done.
And I felt like a king.
Chapter 21
Sutton
Just when I thought things were changed in my life for the better – and that they were going to stay that way – I found myself launched right back in the middle of Hell.
I knew the news about Chad’s arrest was going to be the hot topic in the halls for a while, but I didn’t know it was going to turn into such a big deal, or that it was going to be turned so strongly against me. Of course, I knew I shouldn’t have been surprised. Because of his status with Peter and Damon, Chad had been one of the most popular guys in school.
I’d always gotten the impression he had a hard time getting dates, and that was part of the reason why he had come onto me so strongly. But, the more I heard the gossip in the halls, the more it seemed the girls in school were idolizing him and demonizing me.
Perhaps Molly had something to do with it. It was no secret she hated me again, and I knew she and Chad were friends. There was a time, right after he tried to assault me in my bedroom and Molly and Damon broke up, I was pretty convinced the two of them were dating.
Nothing seemed to really come of it, but there was a good chance in my mind the two of them really were sleeping together. But then, Molly was pretty loose with the guys she thought were attractive, and I had a feeling there were quite a few in school she had slept with at one point or another.
But, I didn’t want to be caught up in the web of gossip and rumors that were once again all over the school, and I was hurt and surprised that I was once again the butt of so many jokes, and the one who had to endure the snide remarks that came from other students when I walked down the hall.
So many times I wanted to lash out at them, telling them they didn’t know me. They were right there to make fun of me whenever the chance came, but they weren’t my friends, and they didn’t know anything about me. They just jumped on the band wagon whenever something like this happened, and I was made to deal with it on my own.
Abby and Peter did their best to stop any of the rumors they heard, and Damon, well, he was right there with me, threatening any of the kids who dared to make fun of me when he was around. It didn’t seem like anyone was off limits when it came to what he said.
And, while I felt good for the support from my true friends, the fact of the matter was that I still felt largely alone. I was the one who was blamed for what happened to Chad even though he was the one who at
tacked me. I was the one who was blamed for him getting arrested even though Damon was the one who had gone to the cops and Susan and Dean were the two who forced his hand.
It didn’t make any sense to me, but then, there were plenty of times in my life when I felt like I was the one who was meant to take the blame for anything that went wrong, no matter what it was. I was the one who was the easy target. I was the one who was suicidal in the sixth grade, so I might as well take the brunt of the abuse now.
Even the school addressed me personally over what happened. The counselor called me into her office – not to talk about what Chad had done to me and how I was coping with that, but for the fact that the allegation that I had against him was a very serious offense, and she wanted to make sure I was serious about making it.
“I know there are times when girls feel frustrated with guys because of one thing or another, and it can be easy to say something like this because you are hurt or angry,” she said.
I stared at her in utter shock. “You think that I’m mad at Chad so I said that he sexually assaulted me in my own bedroom?”
“I’m not accusing you of lying, no,” she said, though that was very much what she had just done. “I’m just telling you that you need to be careful of some of the things that you say if they aren’t true. We’ve had Chad at this school for his entire life, and I can tell you, this is the first time that we’ve ever heard of such serious accusations against him. He comes from a very good family, he’s a good student, and he’s popular with the kids. So are you sure that’s what happened?”
I wanted to laugh, or cry, or both. I gave her a hard stare. “Yes, I’m sure he tried to force me to sleep with him when I made it very clear that I didn’t want any of it. Damon was the one who had to come into the room and break the whole thing up, or I’m not sure how far it would have gone. Thank God Damon was there, or I’m sure it would be a lot more serious than an allegation against a popular student.”
