“Yes, and?”
“Tiff, you don’t understand. All I want to do is kiss her, to be with her, but I know she doesn’t want that.”
“You saw the cottage before she came home. You know she still loves you.”
“Yes, but she doesn’t want to love me. That place was a shrine to the life we had before. We’re not the same people anymore. I just need a day or two to get my feelings under control and then I’ll be back. I need to pack up my apartment anyway.” She also needed to sell her car. Molly hadn’t asked yet, but surely she knew it took longer than a week to sell something like that. If she found out Jac had used her own money to bring her home and set up the cottage, Molly would go spare. “I have no intention of not coming back. I just need some time.”
Tiffany glanced away, hands on hips. “You two are seriously ruining my dating life. Fine. I’ll go see her after I finish work.”
“No, you can’t wait until then. She’s had a pain pill, but they only knock her out for an hour or two. If she wakes up and I’m not there she’ll be worried.”
“Wait. She doesn’t know you’re going?”
Jac looked away, shame washing over her. “No.”
“For fuck’s sake, Jac.”
“I know, but I couldn’t stay there a minute longer. If I do I’ll end up doing something stupid, like kissing her, and then she’ll hate me.”
“Do you really think a few days away will quash that impulse?”
“I can hope, can’t I?”
“Just go. But don’t be surprised if she’s pissed when she finds out.”
Jac pulled Tiffany into a quick hug, whispering into her ear, “Thank you.” She pulled back. “Tell her I’ll call her tonight, but don’t tell her why I left.”
“I really don’t like all these secrets.”
“You’re the best, Tiff.” Jac sprinted off into the direction of the carpark, ignoring the voice in her head screaming at her that she was making a terrible mistake.
Chapter Sixteen
Molly gradually came awake, the smell of mud and water making her nose twitch. She recognised the smell, she had smelled it from the first day they opened Bloomin’ Butterfly. She opened her eyes seeing Tiffany scrolling through her mobile sitting on the footstool, a sly grin on her face.
“Tiffany?” Tiffany’s head shot up, her cheeks flushing. “Boyfriend?” Molly indicated the phone.
“It was Craig. I had to rearrange our date tonight, again, and I was just letting him know.”
“Oh no. Is there a problem on the farm?” Molly hoped not. She wasn’t exactly in the best place to be helping out. It wasn’t fair for Tiffany to be overseeing everything but they didn’t really have a choice. Tiffany’s blush deepened and she glanced away. “What is it, Tiff? And where’s Jac?” she asked looking around the room as if she expected Jac to appear.
“The farm is fine. Everything is going to plan.”
“Then why do you look so shifty?”
Tiffany stood, shoving her phone into her pocket. Her hand went to her hips and she glared at Molly. “You know, we’re all approaching our forties. Don’t you think it’s time you both start acting like grown-ups and admit how you feel about each other?”
“What are you talking about?” Jac is who she’s talking about, but why? “I’m too tired for your cryptic ramblings. Just get on with it.”
“Jac’s gone back to London for a couple of days.” Tiffany sat back on the stool, crossing her ankles and folding her hands in her lap. She looked directly at Molly. “I’m not supposed to tell you this but I’m tired of being your go-between. Jac is still in love with you and she has gotten overwhelmed being so close to you. Seems she can’t control her urges and wants to kiss you all the time.”
“Oh.” Molly blinked, unsure of what to say. Of course she knew Jac was still in love with her, she had told Molly that in the hospital, but she had no idea about her urges. Yeah, she thought Jac wanted to kiss her last night, but Molly hoped that was a one-time thing. “Why didn’t she tell me she needed space?”
“She thinks you’ll be angry with her for not letting you go and hoping for a reconciliation.”
“So she just left?”
“Yep. She said she’ll call you later tonight and for me to babysit you.” At Molly’s raised eyebrows she rushed on. “Well, she didn’t actually say babysit, more like keep an eye on you until she comes back. Now, what are we going to do about getting you both back together?”
“I told you I wasn’t ready for that.”
“And I call bullshit.” She stood again and paced in the small space. “I’ve spoken to you both. She loves you and you love her. Stop pussy-footing around and getting me involved. I’ve got my own love life to take care of.”
Molly worried the skin on the side of her thumb as she thought. Could she really just jump back in with Jac? To tell her how she feels? She was being a wuss and she knew it. As Tiffany said, they were adults, no reason they couldn’t have a proper adult conversation about their feelings.
“She knows about the boxes.”
“What?” Molly wasn’t sure she heard right. Tiffany stopped pacing and grinned at Molly.
“Yeah. She came by the evening I was clearing it all out to build the ramp out front. Thought a burglar was in here or something. She saw everything. I told her your request and she helped me pack it all up.”
No, it can’t be. “Why didn’t she say anything?” Molly didn’t think her heart could beat any faster. This was all too much. The pain pill was wearing off faster than she would have liked and her leg and knee throbbed in time to her pulse.
“She wanted you to tell her in your own time. Personally, I think she’s just as much a chicken as you.” Tiffany went to Molly, her gaze softening as she took her hand. “She wants you, Molly, but she knows you need to make the first move. So, what are we going to do for when she gets back?”
Molly’s mind scrambled with possibilities. Tiffany was right, it was time to show Jac just how much she meant to her and to stop lying to herself that she wasn’t still in love with her. She wasn’t ready to jump straight back into a relationship yet, all the things going on with the farm and her healing still needed to be taken care of first, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t make a start on rebuilding the connection between them.
“I have a plan,” Molly said, smiling widely as she thought of just the perfect way to show Jac her feelings for her.
***
Jac couldn’t get hold of Molly the night before, she assumed she was too exhausted and hadn’t heard the phone ring. Tiffany had assured her Molly was fine, just tired, and she would see her when she got back. Jac hoped she wasn’t angry with her for leaving but she knew she would be. Running away had been a terrible idea, but at least she had managed to pack her things from the apartment and put them in storage. She hadn’t been able to sell the car though. Thoughts of her father making it too hard to let it go. She would keep it in the garage and eventually tell Molly she wasn’t able to part with it.
With everything done she didn’t really have any more reason to stay away from Molly. All the distance had done was make her heartache the way it did when they broke up. She would just need to learn to live with the fact Molly didn’t want a romantic relationship with her, and stuff her feelings deep inside. She had done it before, she could do it again, no matter how much it hurt.
She had texted Molly telling her she would be back by seven that evening and not to worry if she was a little late, she was definitely coming home. Now, at close to seven-thirty, the sign for Bloomin’ Butterfly came into view. She drove carefully down the dirt track that led to Molly’s cottage and pulled up to a stop outside. No lights were visible inside and the blinds were drawn. Knowing Molly was probably asleep, Jac quietly opened the front door and clicked it shut behind her. The sound of a piano wafted down the hallway from the direction of Molly’s office. Jac bent to take off her boots and noticed rose petals leading from the front door to the same directi
on of the music. She frowned, unsure what was going on. She took a few steps forward and peeked into the lounge, mildly alarmed when she saw the bed was empty. As a coil of tension settled in her gut she followed the petals. When she opened the office door Jac thought she would drop dead where she stood from shock. Candles flickered around the room and the smell of garlic permeated the air. A small table for two had been set up in the centre of the room, crystal glasses, linen napkins, and a vase of roses adorned the plum coloured table cloth. Jac took all this in in a milli-second, what captured her attention was Molly sitting behind the table. Her hair was stylishly pinned up, revealing her glorious neck. Subtle make-up highlighted her eyes and cheeks, lipstick the colour of peaches graced her lips. Jac’s gaze dropped to Molly’s chest. She wore a deep red silk blouse, the top three buttons undone with a hint of cleavage showing.
“Welcome home,” Molly said. Her tongue peeked out and moistened her lips. “We need to talk.”
“What are you doing out of bed? Your legs must be killing you.” Not the smartest thing to say. Molly had obviously gone through a lot of trouble for her and she had just pissed all over it. She winced when Molly frowned and looked away. “Shit. I’m sorry. I’m just a little stunned.” She rushed to Molly’s side, dismayed when a tear slipped from her eye.
“I wanted to do something nice for you. To tell you what you mean to me. It was stupid.” Molly grabbed the wheels of her chair, rolling them backward. “You’re right, I’m a little sore. Do you think you can help me get back into bed?”
Jac stopped her progress, feeling like a dick. Molly had planned something special for her and she needed to rescue the evening. “Wait, please. Let’s start again. I’m sorry.”
Molly shook her head. “We seem to be starting again a lot recently, and I’m not sure I can keep doing it. This was a mistake. I’ve made a fool out of myself and I just want to go to bed.”
Knowing that the evening was well and truly ruined Jac grasped the handles and wheeled Molly back to the lounge. She got Molly settled on the bed and then passed her her nightshirt. Molly hadn’t looked at her once through the whole ordeal and Jac could only imagine how embarrassed she must be feeling. She turned her back so Molly could change tops, then placed the blouse onto the footstool.
“I’m glad you’re home, Jac. Goodnight.”
Molly turned her head away, still refusing to look at her, so Jac left and went back to the office. She extinguished the candles and turned off the music. Flopping into the chair in the dark she hung her head, not believing how she had messed this all up. Anyone could see Molly was attempting to court her. The whole place was done up like a fancy restaurant like they would be on a date. And what had Jac done? Fucking stomped all over her advances, that’s what. Wasn’t this what Jac had been waiting for all this time? For Molly to finally admit her true feelings for her? But Jac just had to go and fuck it all up. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
She sat in the dark for long while thinking about what to do next, how she could repair the damage she had caused yet again. There would be no point in talking about it. Molly would only be more embarrassed by it all. No, there was only one thing to do. Take action. Jac stood from the chair and strode into the lounge, not stopping until she was next to the bed and leaning over Molly.
“Jac? What are you doing?”
“I’m sorry if this upsets you, but I can’t wait any longer.” She dipped her head and silenced Molly’s next question with the press of her lips. Molly tried to jerk away but Jac followed, not allowing Molly any room to escape her. She cupped her cheek with a trembling hand and kissed her again, thrilled when Molly kissed her back, opening her lips to allow Jac entry with her tongue. It was like the last five years hadn’t happened. The taste and feel of Molly was so exquisite, so sweet that Jac never wanted to move. Molly’s fingers trailed up her arm and into her hair, holding her closer, moaning into Jac’s mouth.
“Ow, shit,” Molly said breaking away from Jac.
“Did I hurt you?” Instantly alarmed Jac searched Molly’s lips, thinking she might have bitten her in her frenzy.
“No, I just jerked my leg without thinking. It’s okay, the pain is fading now.”
She leaned toward Jac again, trying to kiss her, but Jac moved back. “When did you last have a pill?”
“This morning. I didn’t want to be doped up when you got here.”
“I’ll get you one now.” She didn’t’ really want Molly to fall asleep, she wanted to continue kissing her, but Molly being in pain wasn’t something she would allow. She fetched a tablet and a glass of water, handing them over to Molly. Molly took the items whilst glaring at her.
“I don’t want to take it. It’ll make me sleepy.”
“You need to.”
“But I want you to kiss me again.” Molly’s lips pouted in the most adorable way and it was nearly Jac’s undoing.
“We can do more of that tomorrow, but tonight you need to rest.” Jac couldn’t resist one more quick kiss. Pulling back she said, “We do need to talk, but I’m guessing after earlier and just now, you’re open to there being an us again?”
“I want to try.”
“Then we’ll continue this tomorrow. Take your pill. And go to sleep.”
“Yes, boss.” Molly swallowed the tablet and handed the glass back. Jac tucked her in, kissing her forehead. “Before this takes effect you need to know I love you.”
“I love you, too. Now go to sleep.”
Jac waited until Molly drifted off then headed into the bedroom. She laid on the bed fully clothed, the biggest smile on her face. All her dreams had come true tonight with just one kiss. One kiss from the only woman for her, her soul mate. Sure, they still had things they needed to talk about, but for tonight at least, Jac could go to sleep without the heavy weight of guilt and grief holding her down. Tonight she would sleep with the lightest heart she had had for a very long time.
Chapter Seventeen
Jac was up early the next morning, standing in the kitchen making bacon and eggs. She hummed softly, not wanting to make too much noise and wake Molly yet. The images from last night kept her from falling into a deep sleep, but she didn’t mind, kissing Molly was the greatest experience ever, and one she hoped to repeat soon.
“Jac?” Molly’s sleep filled voice called from the living room, the tone making Jac smile. It always took her a long time to fully wake up and in those moments she was adorable. Puffy eyed and mussed hair. She was always beautiful to Jac, but even more so in those unguarded moments.
She turned the heat down on the cooker to stop the bacon burning and went into the lounge. “Good morning, sleepyhead.” Her natural instinct would be to kiss Molly hello, but a wave of nerves hit her. She gazed into Molly’s eyes and saw the invitation in them. She leaned over and kissed her tenderly on the lips. Molly tried to deepen the kiss but Jac pulled back. “I have breakfast cooking.”
“Hmm, I know. The smell woke me.”
“Did you sleep okay?” Jac twilled a lock of her hair, relishing the softness.
“Perfectly. I had the most wonderful dream.” Molly’s hand snaked up Jac’s arm and settled under the shirt sleeve of her T-shirt, stroking her shoulder. “I’m so happy you came home last night.”
“Me too. More than you know.” Jac glanced away for a second. “I’m sorry I messed things up when I came in the door. I wasn’t expecting you to do any of that. It threw me for a second.”
“But you didn’t mind?”
“Oh no, I loved it. I’m just sorry I ruined your evening.”
“Well, you redeemed yourself by lights out.”
Jac smiled and pecked her on the lips. “Now, let’s get you sorted and then I’ll serve breakfast. Molly used the bedpan and brushed her teeth, after that was all taken care of, Jac finished off the bacon and eggs and handed one plate to Molly. Jac took her customary seat on the footstool. She watched as Molly tried cutting into her bacon, grimacing when the knife wouldn’t go through. Molly drew her brows do
wn and then picked the bacon up with her fingers, trying to dip it into her egg; which was way overcooked.
“Um, Jac?”
“Yeah?”
“I don’t suppose we have any cereal?”
Jac laughed loudly. She really was a terrible cook, but she thought she could at least do something as easy as bacon and eggs. She returned the plates to the kitchen, coming back with a bowl of corn flakes for each of them. “Perhaps we should hire a cook.”
“Nah, it’s okay. Hopefully, I’ll be up and about soon and can take care of cooking.”
Jac didn’t want to dampen Molly’s good mood so she nodded. In between mouthfuls, she asked, “How did you manage to do all that last night?”
“Tiffany cooked for me while I did my hair and make-up. She got me into the chair and I did the candles and stuff.”
“It really was a nice thing to come home to.” She looked at Molly shyly. “Maybe we can do it again sometime.”
Molly smiled widely. “I’d like that.”
“You can’t go in there, Barry.” Jac looked toward the hall when she heard Tiffany’s voice calling from the front door.
“It’s my house, I can do what I want,” Barry shouted as he burst through the door without knocking.
Jac stood from the stool rushing to intercept Barry before he came into the lounge. “What do you think you’re doing?”
Barry glared up at her, a smirk stretching across his ruddy face. “I have an eviction notice for you.” He thrust out a piece of paper, forcing Jac to take it. “Ms. Fisher is trespassing on my property and I want her out.”
“What are you talking about? She has a lease for the farm, and you signed the agreement giving us four months to vacate.” Jac scanned the document, not liking what she saw.
“The lease if for the land Bloomin’ Butterfly is on. This cottage isn’t on that land. It’s my own private cottage that I kindly allowed Ms. Fisher to stay in. Rent-free might I add. Now I want it back.”
Butterfly Kisses Page 11
