by Naima Simone
Doubtful, since the man didn’t have one.
“Not that it’s any of your business, but I need to speak to her. Last time we spoke, she made some...irrational accusations and threats. We need to clear this up. As a family,” he sneered.
Gideon arched an eyebrow. “Threats?” Pride and admiration warmed him. “There’s an interesting turn of events.”
“You would find it funny.” Trevor scowled. “She wasn’t like this before. I’m thinking it’s the company she’s been keeping.”
“Thank you.” Gideon dipped his head in acknowledgment. “And just for the record, your sister has always been strong. You were just too busy playing lord of the manor to recognize it. If you had, maybe you would’ve used her brilliance for the advantage of your family company instead of sticking her in some bullshit position. Then she might not have had to go form her own business, but could’ve helped yours grow.”
“You know nothing about Shay,” Trevor growled, shifting forward as if ready to leap over the desk. “Don’t pretend that your relationship,” he spat the word, “was real. She told me the truth about your blackmailing her into pretending you two were a couple. She also informed me about the file of lies you have on me.”
Shock reverberated through him. When she’d claimed she wouldn’t go one more day living a lie, had she been referring to confessing to her brother about their arrangement?
Flipping these new revelations over and over in his mind, Gideon returned his attention to Trevor. “You might have tried that argument with Shay, but don’t bother with me. Everything listed in that file is the least of your crimes. We both know who you are, Trevor. We both know what you’re capable of,” he growled. “You used my sister, then tossed her aside like she was something beneath your shoe. No, I take that back. You would’ve at least paused and scraped something off the bottom of your precious loafers. You didn’t even give her that courtesy. And for what? A grudge against me from high school? You broke her, and for you it was business as usual.”
“Like you broke my sister?” Trevor accused. “Eye for an eye? Don’t stand there and preach to me like you’re so self-righteous, when you turned around and did the same thing to Shay. You used her to get back at me. That doesn’t make you the hero in this story.”
“You’re right.”
Trevor’s mouth snapped closed, his eyes flaring in surprise at Gideon’s quick agreement, before narrowing. He was probably wondering what Gideon’s game was now. But there wasn’t any game. There wasn’t any trickery to slide another point home as if this was a contest to be won.
He’d used Shay. Oh yes, he’d justified it as righting a wrong against Olivia, as protecting future women from being hurt by Trevor. But the truth couldn’t be denied any longer. His actions hadn’t been noble—they’d been selfish, vengeful...and reprehensible. Maybe unforgivable.
Not because of Trevor. He still had zero fucks to give about Trevor. But because he’d dragged an innocent into it. As blameless as Olivia had been in Trevor’s schemes, Shay had been just as blameless. His mother’s warning haunted him, ringing in his head like a premonition that had come to pass. He had ended up hurting others. And the most important person he’d hurt was Shay. No, he wasn’t Trevor—could never deliberately deceive and devastate someone, then walk away from a child he’d created—but he’d also blackmailed, hurt, then turned his back on the woman he loved.
God. He loved her.
The force of the revelation struck him with the blow of a mallet to the chest. He sank to his chair, staring blindly ahead.
He loved Shay.
Somehow, despite every wall, every barrier and shield he’d thrown up, she’d wedged herself into his heart, his soul. No wonder he’d felt so empty these past days. The one who’d given him life again was gone. Because, yes, she’d resuscitated him, jolting his heart so it beat again. She’d given him more than work to be excited about—she’d given him her quiet humor, her defiance, her wit, her loyalty, her body...her love.
And what had he done? Thrown it back at her like it meant nothing.
Don’t feel guilty, Gideon. I’m used to not being enough for the men in my life.
Pain, razor sharp and searing hot, razed his chest. He gasped at the agony of it. Nothing—absolutely nothing—could be further from the truth. She was more than enough. She was everything. But he’d been willing to throw away a future with her for revenge.
“Gideon,” Trevor snapped, hauling Gideon out of the hell he’d plummeted into.
He jerked his head up, blinking. God, he’d forgotten all about this man standing in his office. And now he didn’t have time for him or the vendetta that had brought both of them low. Urgency spiraling through him, Gideon shot to his feet and strode across the room. Removing a large picture from the wall, he revealed the safe behind it and quickly punched in the code to open it. He withdrew the thick, brown file inside, then slammed the safe door shut, not bothering to replace the painting.
“Here.” He marched over to Trevor and shoved the dossier containing all his damning information into the other man’s chest. “Take it. There aren’t any more copies other than the one I gave your sister.”
“What?” Trevor gasped. He clutched the folder, glancing at it before his gaze whipped back to Gideon. “What’s your angle now? You can’t seriously just hand this over to me without wanting something in return.”
Gideon stepped back, shaking his head. “No angle. No ulterior motive. But you’re right. I do want something in return. Or rather, someone. I want Shay. More than that file or revenge against you. But that’s for me to fix, not you.”
How he’d go about doing that, he had no clue. Hell, by all rights, she shouldn’t forgive him. But he needed her. He loved her.
And he’d fight to have her. Harder than he’d ever fought to pay back Trevor.
Because winning Shay was more important than any battle he’d ever faced.
Nineteen
“Order up, babe.”
Shay turned around and rushed across the minimal space inside the food truck to grab the two cartons of larb served over thin noodles. Snatching up napkins and plastic utensils, she placed everything in a bag and handed it to the waiting customers through the window. Smiling and thanking them, she turned to the next person and took his order for green papaya salad.
Bridgette had called that morning, asking if she would help her out on the truck again. Though Shay suspected her friend had arranged this sudden lack of help to keep her busy and her mind off a certain person, she’d jumped at the chance to get out of her newly leased, empty Edgewater apartment. More specifically, she’d been eager to get out of her head.
In the almost two weeks since she’d walked away from Gideon, she’d found an apartment—despite Bridgette’s argument that she could stay with her as long as she wanted—located a small office space for Leida Investments, officially resigned from RemingtonNeal, opened a safe deposit box for the damning file on her brother and done more research on start-up companies that she could invest in.
Yes, her family and love life had exploded, but she refused to stop living. A gaping hole existed where her heart had once been, but that didn’t mean she would roll over and give in. She’d meant every word she’d uttered to Gideon.
This was her time. Her life. And no one but she was in control of it.
She might have lost the man she loved because he wanted revenge and hate rather than her, but for the first time in longer than she could remember, she loved herself. She valued herself. And she was demanding it from everyone in her life.
As Bridgette had put it, Shay was a boss.
Dammit, yeah, she was.
She’d learned something in the last couple weeks. She would’ve loved having Gideon in her life. But he wasn’t her life.
And she was okay with that.
“Have another order for the larb
, but by itself, without the noodles,” she called out to Bridgette over her shoulder before returning her attention to the window and the next customer. “Hi, how can I...” She trailed off, the sudden lurch of her heart to her throat preventing the rest of the words from escaping.
No.
No.
She stared into midnight eyes with stars and the scream inside her head increased in volume. It wasn’t fair. What the hell was he doing here? Telling him she loved him and having him reject her had been agonizing, humiliating. How did he not know that? Was he a sadist getting pleasure from her pain?
Well, screw that.
She schooled her features into the cool, polite mask she’d mastered since she’d been old enough to sit at the adult table. He wouldn’t get anything else from her. She didn’t have it in her to give.
“What are you doing here, Gideon?” she asked, proud when not so much as a tremor shook her voice.
Behind her, Bridgette appeared next to her elbow like a bodyguard. “What the hell is this?” she demanded, spatula still in hand.
“I got this,” Shay murmured to her friend. “We’re busy, as you can tell,” she said to Gideon. “And you and I don’t have anything left to say to each other.”
Again, she sounded calm even to her own ears. Sounded as if her fingertips didn’t tingle with the need to touch him.
But inside...
Inside she quaked. Love, hurt, yearning, desire—they all coalesced and swirled in her chest, leaving almost no room for air. She dragged in what little she could and waited.
“You don’t have to say anything, moonbeam. All I ask is for you to listen.”
“Don’t call me that,” she snapped, and silently cursed herself for betraying that much emotion. She shouldn’t care if he murmured that endearment. It shouldn’t affect her.
“Two minutes, Shay.” His dark gaze searched hers. “Please.”
Please.
Like before, it gave her pause.
“Two minutes. That’s it,” she agreed.
“Thank you,” he said, then hesitating, he dragged his hands over his head. Taken aback by the uncharacteristically nervous gesture, Shay narrowed her eyes on him. Noting for the first time the faint smudges under his eyes, the two-minutes-past-five-o’clock shadow that darkened his jaw. Where was the clean-cut, reserved man she’d known?
He gave a rough, abrupt chuckle. “Now that I’m here, I don’t know where to begin.” Sighing, he dropped his arm. “First, I should apologize. And I am sorry, Shay. I used you. There’s no getting around that fact. I rationalized and defended my actions by claiming I wanted justice for Olivia. That your brother had gotten away with hurting people long enough, and if no one else would make him pay, then I would. But what I didn’t want to admit is that I blamed myself.
“I hated myself as much as, if not more than, him. It was my job to protect my sister, and I failed. If I’d been a better brother, she would’ve felt free to tell me about the relationship with Trevor instead of keeping it a secret. And most of all, if not for me, she wouldn’t have even been on his radar. Me. It all came back to me, and I couldn’t bear the guilt, the shame and, God, yes, the anger. It was that anger that led me to do what I had judged him for—ruthlessly using you to get to him. I convinced myself I was more honorable than him, but in my rage, I’d become him. And worst of all, I hurt you. That, I will never forgive myself for.”
Soul-deep shock robbed her of speech. Even the long line of people behind him had stopped grumbling and were quiet. A few even had their phones out. She mentally winced. Gideon wouldn’t be happy to know he was probably live-streaming on social media.
“Gideon, you don’t have to—” she began, only to be cut off.
“Yes, I do. I’m desperate, Shay. I don’t have any pride left. Not when it comes to you. And I don’t want it. Don’t need it. Not when it kept me from telling you how important you are. God, baby, you’re vital. Nothing is the same without you in my world. Before you, work, family, money, success—those were priorities. Hell, they were everything. But since you walked away from me, I still have all of those, and aside from my mother and sister, they don’t fulfill me anymore.
“I can’t concentrate at work because I’m wondering where you are, what you’re doing...if you’re thinking about me. I could escape into all the things wealth buys, I could travel to the most exotic places on this earth, but I’d see nothing, appreciate nothing, because you wouldn’t be there with me. Success?” He held up his hands, palms out. “Until you, I measured success by how many clients I had, the profits, how many doors opened for me. But now? Success is how many times I can make you smile. How many times I can hear you say I love you. How many nights I can fall asleep beside you. How many ways I can prove to you that you’re loved. So far, I’ve been damn unsuccessful.”
“Wow,” Bridgette whispered beside her. Shay shot her friend a look, and she shrugged, smiling sheepishly. “I mean, bastard.”
Shaking her head, Shay returned her gaze to the man who’d captured her attention and that of an increasingly growing lunch crowd in Hyde Park. She blinked back the tears stinging her eyes, and her heart pounded thickly against her rib cage. Hope tried to rear its foolish head, but she slapped it back down. She’d been stupid enough to spin impossible dreams around this man once, even though he’d never made promises to her. And that was just it. She could no longer afford to pin nebulous hopes on a man who refused to put her first. No matter how lovely his speech.
“Thank you for the apology, Gideon. I really do appreciate it. But I can’t risk taking a chance on you. How long before you realize you’re sleeping with the enemy—literally—and resent me for it? I can’t live waiting for that day to happen.”
“You don’t get it, moonbeam,” he said, moving closer to the service window. And in spite of her resolve, she leaned forward, a part of her—the part that woke up aching for him every night, the part that refused to stop believing in fairy tales—desperate to hear what she didn’t get. “I love you. I don’t know when it happened. When I sat down across from you in that restaurant and you essentially told me to go to hell? When you refused to answer my phone call and cater to me because you were helping a friend? When I played my guitar for you? Maybe...” He hesitated, swallowed hard. Then whispered, “Maybe the first time I saw you as Camille.”
“Saw you as Camille? What kind of kink are y’all into?” Bridgette muttered from behind her.
Shay ignored her, latched on to every word falling from Gideon’s lips. Ensnared by those onyx eyes that she couldn’t tear herself away from.
“I don’t deserve you. But there’s no man on this earth who does. But that won’t stop me from fighting for you. From fighting for us. From begging you to not throw me away, even though I almost did. Moonbeam, you complete me in a way revenge never could. Without you as my conscience, my lover, my friend, I’m empty. I want to be full. I want to be found. Please, don’t leave me out there again. I love you, Shay Neal. Desperately. Completely. Finally. There’s no going back for me. There’s no one else.”
He gifted her with the words she’d given him. Only this time, he was the one standing on the ledge, hoping she would grasp his hand and pull him back to safety, to love. He’d pushed her over that night. And now, she could do the same. Pay him back. Turn away to a future that he wouldn’t be in, but would still be good. Or she could reach across, risk her heart again and jump off the edge, trusting him to catch her. And hold her forever.
There was no choice.
Running, she barreled out of the truck, but before she could round it, she crashed into Gideon. He hadn’t waited, but met her halfway. That’s what they would always do—meet each other. Never fail to be there for one another.
Dimly, she heard a roar of applause and cheers, but as his arms closed around her, and she wrapped hers around his neck, everything else ceased to exist. He captured
her mouth in a kiss that stole her breath and sent heat roaring through her. But most of all, it shattered every remnant of fear and doubt, promising her with the thrust of his tongue, the molding of his lips, that he would love her, cherish her, worship her. And she returned the vow.
“I love you,” she whispered, peppering his mouth, jaw and chin with kisses. “I love you so much.”
“I thought I’d never hear you say that again,” he rasped, pressing his forehead to hers.
“I promise you I’ll never stop telling you.” She took his mouth this time, leaving them shaking against each other. “I love you.”
“Forever?”
“Forever.”
Epilogue
One Year Later
“Mrs. Knight, your husband’s here to see you.”
Shay smiled, pressing the speaker button on her desk phone. God, she never tired of being called that. “Please send him in, Jackie.” Seconds later, her executive assistant opened the door, grinning as Gideon strode past her. Leida Investments was still small, but now Shay could afford a staff. Even if that staff was just Jackie. Still, the business was steadily growing, and Shay couldn’t be happier.
Well, she took that back, her smile warming as Gideon crossed the room and took her into his arms. With the news she’d just received not minutes ago, she could indeed be happier. And she was.
Her lips parted under his, and as always, his kiss kindled the desire that only he could stir within her. She tilted her head back farther, opened her mouth wider, and he dived deeper. By the time he lifted his head, their rough breaths echoed in the office.
“I’m supposed to be taking you to lunch,” he reminded her with a sensual smile that was reflected in his eyes. “But with you kissing me like that, hell, moonbeam, you might be lunch.”
She chuckled. “You’re bad. And I refuse to keep your mother and sister waiting. I had to twist Bridgette’s arm to let me have Olivia for an afternoon, so nope, not missing lunch.”
