Buck Cowboys

by Elle Thorpe

  Hallie stood as she saw me and held a hand out when I reached her.

  I linked my fingers through hers, reassured by her warmth and touch. “Sorry,” I mouthed to her. “Work.”

  She nodded, and we strolled to toward the elevators.

  “What’s up that couldn’t wait until tomorrow?” I asked Brad.

  “You haven’t heard the news then?”

  “World news or bull riding news? Been kinda busy so I haven’t really been keeping up with either to be honest.”

  “Jorge Kinsaya just pulled out of the competition.”

  I froze. “What? Why?”

  Jorge was a hotshot from Brazil, who had dominated the competition for the past five years. None of us had even come close to touching him on the scoreboard.

  “Wrecked his ACL on a practice ride yesterday. Isn’t that great?”

  I frowned at Brad’s callous words, though this was nothing new, coming from him. The man liked his riders to win, he always had. And he was cutthroat about getting them, and in turn, himself, the glory. “No, not really. Is he okay?”

  “He’s completely done until he recovers from surgery. Which puts him out until the new season, thus opening a path for you.”

  Shit. He was right. No matter how bad I felt for Jorge, him being out of the competition left it wide open for the rest of us. I was clustered in a group that had been well below Jorge’s rank, but with him gone, it was anybody’s title to take. A flicker of excitement lit up in my chest.

  “This is your chance to make your mark, and it couldn’t have come at a better time. We’re going to hit the ground running once we pick you up tomorrow. We’ve got a heap of press booked, and even that Today show wants to talk to you.”

  I blinked. “What? Since when does the mainstream media care about bull riders?”

  “Since I spun them your story and told them you were in prime position to be our next superstar.”

  A little thrill of pride shot through all the overwhelm. I might not have particularly liked Brad as a person, but he knew bulls. He knew cowboys. And if he said I had a shot, then hell, maybe I did?

  “Sleep well tonight, kid. Tomorrow starts a whole new phase in your career. Be ready for it.”

  He hung up before I could even say goodbye.

  “Something happen?” Hallie asked, as we stepped onto the elevator.

  I looked down at her and felt that same familiar tug that happened every time I thought about leaving her. The doors slid shut, and the elevator lurched to life, dropping down a floor. “Yeah, that was my boss—”

  A screeching sound pierced the air, right as the elevator slammed to a halt and plunged us into complete darkness.

  21

  Hallie

  Completely blind, I fell back against the mirrored walls of the elevator, grasping for something to hold on to, with my heart slamming against my ribcage.

  “Fuck,” Nate swore into the darkness. “Are you okay?”

  Apart from nearly having an instant heart attack? “Yeah, I’m fine. Are we stuck?”

  The control panel randomly lit up every button with a green glow that cast an eerie light around the small space, before going dark again. But it was enough for Nate to locate the intercom to call for assistance.

  “Hello?” Nate asked the crackle that came down the line.

  A gruff, bored-sounding voice answered, identifying himself as building maintenance.

  “We seem to be stuck in the elevator.”

  There was a string of muttered curse words. “How many people you got in there with you?”

  “Just the two of us.”

  The guy sighed. “Either of you claustrophobic?”

  I didn’t like the sound of that. “I’m not exactly thrilled by the idea of being in here, but I’m not claustrophobic.”

  “Me neither,” Nate confirmed.

  “Good. Because you’re going to be in there for a while. Probably a couple of hours.”

  “Hours!” Nate and I yelped in unison.

  “Yeah, sorry folks. This happened last week, too. I need to get the elevator company out. This isn’t something building maintenance can fix.”

  I slid down the wall to sit on the floor. “Well, that’s just great.”

  Nate sat beside me. “Could be worse.”

  “How? This is your last night here, and we’re spending it stuck in an elevator that smells of fake lemon and bleach.”

  Nate’s head clunked back against the mirror. “You have a point. I had plans for tonight, too.”

  “Yeah? Like what?”

  “I wanted to take you to this spot out on the lake. I was going to feed you, then convince you to go skinny-dipping with me.”

  I smiled into the darkness. “It wouldn’t have taken much convincing.”

  “Yeah?”

  I shrugged even though he wouldn’t see it. “Watching you get your gear off is kind of my idea of a good time, you know.”

  “Right back at ya.”

  The intercom crackled with static. “Sorry, folks. The repair company is on their way, but like I said, it’s not going to be quick. They have to come from Masonville. Don’t freak out, though, those elevators aren’t airtight, so you’ll still be able to breathe.”

  “Well, that’s reassuring,” Nate muttered sarcastically.

  But my chest tightened at the thought of being in here for an extended period of time. “Tell me more about this night you had planned. Out on the lake, in the fresh air.”

  Nate pressed his fingers into my thigh. “Are you okay?”

  I shook my head. Then changed my mind and nodded. “I am, as long as I don’t think about being in here. Distract me.”

  Nate’s voice sounded slightly huskier when he answered. “I can do that.” His fingers traced a path up my thigh.

  Even through my jeans, it felt delicious, and was exactly what I needed. His fingers massaging into the tight muscle drew my attention away from the fact we were stuck in a tiny metal box and unlikely to escape any time soon.

  “I would have started just like this.” He leaned in and kissed the side of my neck. “And then like this.” His kisses trailed up my neck, to the sensitive spot by my ear. They turned open-mouthed, sucking, and biting, until my head fell to the side and I closed my eyes.

  I gave in to the sensation. Every kiss had me a little less worried about our predicament, both the elevator, and the fact his bus would be here at nine tomorrow morning. When he tilted my face to claim my lips, and his tongue plunged inside my mouth, I forgot entirely.

  “Then I would have pulled you to your feet…” He stood, hauling me up by my hands and wrapping his arms around me. “Then kissed you some more.”

  His kisses were long, and slow, drugging kisses that made me weak at the knees. And wet between my thighs.

  “Then I would have undone these buttons…” His fingers slipped the buttons on my shirt from their holes, and he kissed his way down across my collarbone and the swell of my breasts. He pushed my shirt off my shoulder and bit me there, not hard enough to hurt, but plenty hard enough to send a jolt through my system. It woke my entire body up and I realized what we were doing.

  “Nate, we’re in an elevator!”

  He bared my other shoulder and nipped his way across to it, shoving my shirt down my arms with his palms, leaving me in just my jeans and a bra.

  “We’re at the lake,” he mumbled against my skin.

  “Nate…”

  He chuckled. “Fine. We’re in an elevator, but we’re stuck here in blackness, for God knows how long. You wanted me to distract you, so that’s what I’m doing.”

  “And if someone walks in?”

  He licked his way down between my boobs and cupped them both through my bra. “Isn’t that half the fun? That we could get caught?”

  My core throbbed. “Keep talking.”

  “I want to get you naked, knowing the repair guys could get here at any moment.”

  “What if there’s a camera?” />
  “It’s zero visibility in here. Ain’t nobody seeing you naked but me, Hallie.” He practically growled the last part. “And I want you.”

  His tongue plunged inside my mouth again, and I dug my fingers into his biceps to keep myself upright. I wanted him, too. So bad. And the thought of doing this with him, in a public place, was something I’d thought about for years. This was his last night. My last chance to be wild and crazy with him. He’d be back out on the road tomorrow, and then I’d have nothing but my memories of him. Did I want a memory of sitting in an elevator shaft, panicking about dying? Or did I want this memory to be of me and him, completely naked in the dark, our bodies joining, and him blowing my mind?

  There was no contest.

  I grabbed his shirt and yanked it over his head. In a frantic rush he undid my jeans, yanking them down my legs, while I wriggled out of my bra. His jeans were next, until we stood naked in the darkness, both of us breathing hard, as if we’d just run a marathon.

  “Quick,” I said, lunging for his cock.

  But he caught my hand and walked me backward until I hit the mirrors. The cool, smooth surface was a shock against my bare skin, but then Nate followed me in, putting his warm body to my front, his hot, thick erection between us.

  “Not having a quickie with you, babe. I want to make you writhe, while you’re thinking about someone walking in here and catching us. I want you so lost to the orgasm that you don’t even care. I want to get you there.” His hand slipped between my legs.

  “Oh God,” I whispered.

  His first touch of my clit had me groaning. He rubbed me slowly, like he had all the time in the world, pinching and squeezing the tiny bundle of nerves until sensation built at the base of my spine. I closed my eyes and leaned my head onto his chest, widening my stance.

  His fingers found my opening, wet and needy, and he wasted no more time thrusting two up inside me. Crooking them so he’d hit my G-spot, he worked me until I was trembling and panting.

  He dropped to the floor, lifting one of my knees over his shoulder, opening me up to him fully. His mouth landed on my clit, pressing sexy, dirty, open-mouthed kisses between my folds and licking his way up inside me.

  I moaned loudly, my nipples beading. I let go of him to cup my breasts, squeezing my nipples between my thumbs and forefingers, rolling them in time with the way I rolled my hips against Nate’s tongue. “Nate,” I groaned. “Fuck me. Please.”

  Right on the edge, he stood and pressed his erection to my core, slamming up inside me. I shuddered with desire. I needed him hard and fast, but he was true to his word, slowing the pace and gliding into me like this was a Sunday stroll and not a quick and dirty screw in a public place.

  In that moment, it felt like we did have nothing but time. Everything else fell away, and it was just me, held by the man I loved, as he took my mouth with his own and worshipped my body in the way only he knew how.

  Tiny whimpers of ecstasy fell from my mouth that quickly turned into cries and pleading.

  “I know what you need, Hallie. Let me give it to you.”

  His fingers reached between us, finding my clit, and that was it. Pleasure spiraled out from the base of my spine, spreading through my body and culminating inside my core. I screamed out my release, muffling it with my mouth fitted against Nate’s collarbone, while he pistoned his hips, screwing me so perfectly and so thoroughly that I knew in that moment, he’d ruined me for all other men.

  There was no one else. There never would be. It was me and him. And if I couldn’t have him, then that was all there was for me.

  Jasmine’s words urged me on, but it was my heart that opened, finally breaking down the last of the walls I’d erected that night after prom.

  “I love you, Nate,” I whispered as he came inside me. “I love you so much.”

  Silently in my head, I added, “And I know it’s selfish, but I don’t want you to go.”

  He groaned, stilling inside me, and then freezing, as if he’d only just registered the enormity of my words.

  I held my breath.

  Then he kissed me. A deep, soul-searing kiss I felt right to my toes. A kiss that spoke volumes to my wide-open heart, encouraging it, filling it with hope.

  But when he pulled away, he didn’t say a word.

  He didn’t say it back.

  He didn’t say he would stay.

  22

  Hallie

  Nate and I were both fully dressed and quiet when we were rescued from the elevator. It was a relief to finally be out of the dark, but in the cold light that flooded the elevator, my whispered words of love that he hadn’t returned hung in the air between us.

  We rode back to his place, where I’d left my car, and I hovered, unsure whether I should stay or go.

  He answered that unspoken question by leading me to his bedroom, stripping me of my clothes, and putting me into his bed.

  We hadn’t even eaten, but neither of us mentioned it. He tucked himself in behind me, and though we were both very naked, neither of us made a move to take things further.

  I stared at the navy blue walls of his bedroom, with Nate’s arms tight around me, and replayed the moment in the elevator over and over. His breathing slowed into the peacefulness of sleep, while my brain wouldn’t shut up. I’d done it again. Laid myself bare for him, though this time it had been emotionally, not physically.

  And he’d rejected it.

  I couldn’t make this man love me. But I refused to be ashamed of how I felt. I wasn’t that seventeen-year-old girl anymore. I wasn’t going to run and hide or be angry that he didn’t want me the way I wanted him.

  I loved him. That was all there was to it. And when I put him on that bus tomorrow, I’d kiss him goodbye, and my heart would break.

  I’d taken a chance. At least I could go on with my life, without wondering about the what-ifs.

  I barely slept. I heard Molly every time she woke up, and the lullabies Shep’s mom sang as she put her back to sleep. I counted Nate’s trophies, all forty-six of them, lined up on rows of shelves, his true passion right there like a blinding light I couldn’t turn off. I braced myself for the morning, willing the time to slow down so I could stay in the warmth of his embrace.

  Dawn still came too soon. I dressed slowly in the clothes I’d worn yesterday, and perched on the end of Nate’s bed while he threw his handful of belongings into the single bag he took on tour.

  “Yesterday, before we got on the elevator, it was my boss on the phone.” He tugged at the zipper on his bag without looking at me. “One of the other guys is out with an injury. It puts me in a great position to take his place on the leaderboard. I could win the entire season.”

  “That’s great. I mean, not about the injury…but about taking the lead.”

  He nodded. “Yeah, I guess. They’ve booked a bunch of press for me to do. One of the morning TV shows and everything.”

  True happiness filled me. I wanted this for him. I wanted him to fulfill his dreams. This could be his big break. “Make sure you text me and let me know when it’s on. I’ll be watching.”

  He bit his lip. “Yeah, okay.” His gaze strayed to the time on his phone. “I need to go. The bus will be at the stop in twenty minutes.”

  I stood with a nod and followed him out to the living room. I watched while he said goodbye to Shep’s parents, kissing Mrs. Shepherd on the cheek and shaking hands with her husband. My heart damn near exploded as he picked up Molly, who gave him a wide smile.

  “Gonna miss your squishy face, little girl. You’ll probably be huge by the time I get home again.”

  Molly leaned in toward him with her mouth wide open and planted it on his cheek. Her chubby hands patted his nose and the side of his head.

  He grinned at her. “You finally like me enough for kisses, right as I’m leaving?”

  She just laughed at him.

  Shep’s parents did, too, but I could only smile weakly. Watching Nate hold Molly like that was like my future being
dangled in front of me, then cruelly ripped away. It was all I could do to remain on my feet and not run crying from the house.

  Nate passed the baby back to her grandparents and loaded his bag into the back of my car. I slid behind the wheel, blinking rapidly to keep the tears at bay, and managed to smile brightly when he got into the passenger seat beside me.

  “One trip to the bus stop, coming up.” I completely overdid it on the fake cheerfulness.

  Nate noticed and glanced over at me unhappily. “Hallie…”

  I couldn’t look at him anymore. “Yeah?”

  He sighed. “I want to be selfish and ask you to do the long-distance thing. But I also know it wouldn’t be fair. I might be on the road for years. And you have a life here. A beautiful, big life, full of your friends, and that amazing house that will be a huge success. I don’t want to be the weight that drags you down.”

  I shook my head rapidly. “You wouldn’t be. We could FaceTime. And I could fly out sometimes…”

  But even as I said it, we both knew it wouldn’t work. Not when there was no light at the end of the tunnel. If he’d only had a year or two left, then maybe. But his career was indefinite at this point. And there was no sign of him settling down anytime in the near future.

  That wasn’t any way to live, no matter how much I loved him.

  I pulled up at the bus stop, the tires of my old green Volkswagen kicking up the dust at the side of the road. Nate got out to get his bag, and I followed slowly. I eyed the highway that led into town, and my stomach lurched when in the distance, a hulking silver bus trundled toward us.

  We both just stood there and watched it get closer with every passing second. I couldn’t take my eyes off it, until it stopped right in front of us. Windows opened, and Nate’s friends stuck their heads out, hooting and hollering.

  Nate grinned, waving them back inside the bus.

  He picked up his bag and slung it over his shoulder. “Hallie, look at me.”

  I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to show him the raw hurt and devastation in my eyes. But I couldn’t deny him. I gazed up at him, letting him see it all.