Ruin

by Lila Rose

  “You would have been young when you lived there, yeah?”

  “I was, but Mother always went back to see her family and took Taro and me with her.”

  “How is your mum?”

  Mimi shrugged. “I haven’t seen her yet.”

  I dipped my brows, confused over why that wouldn’t have been the first thing she’d done. They’d been close, right? Hell, if I hadn’t been home in ages, I’d head straight to my mum.

  “How come?”

  “I didn’t want to interrupt her praying.” She took a sip of her drink and whispered, “I worry she won’t want to see me.”

  “Babe. She will. You’re a cool chick. I’m sure your mum has missed you.”

  She smiled softly. “A cool chick?”

  “Yeah.”

  I glanced down at her hands as she wrapped them around her glass and sucked in a deep breath. “I’m sorry for how I acted after….”

  “It’s fine, honey.”

  She shook her head. “It wasn’t. I didn’t know what it was back then, but I have a feeling now that I looked to you for comfort and… I didn’t want to lose that after we’d slept together, because I worried I wouldn’t keep that comfort if we didn’t keep sleeping together. I also realised recently it was more leaving the compound that I worried about. I felt safe there.”

  “You’ll always be a part of Hawks, babe. Even if you don’t sleep with any members. Hell, Mouth could get you a job in there cleaning or working the bar to pay for your room. Never think we’d kick you out because you don’t have one of our cocks between your legs.”

  A blush hit her cheeks. “You and… Cowboy were the only ones I’d slept with.”

  “Cowboy, hey?”

  The blush deepened. Shit, if I had to guess, someone had a crush.

  “Yes.” She shook her head. “Anyway, I also wanted to thank you for coming here with me. I didn’t think it could be like this between us.”

  “It’s nice. Now that you don’t hate me.”

  She laughed. “Yes. Though, I never hated you. You annoyed me, a lot, with your cocky ways, but more in a brother way.”

  “Babe,” I drew out. “Never call me a brother, since we fucked.”

  I drew another laugh from her. “You’re right. If anyone heard, it would be weird.” She rested her hand on my arm and looked up at me, suddenly serious. “Honestly, I must thank you for coming. Having you here… it helps knowing I’m not alone in this.” She shook her head. “I know I have my brother and mother here, but it’s been so long since I’ve seen them, and Hawks has become a part of my life.”

  I placed my hand over hers. “We’re your family also, Mimi. Always.”

  She smiled softly up at me.

  “Say, can you tell me what that situation was with the woman hangin’ all over Wolf? I had a feelin’ I missed somethin’.”

  “You did. He only had her there to distract the family from my arrival.”

  Shit. “Then I fucked it up.”

  Mimi shook her head. “You didn’t. He would have sent her on her way in the end anyway.”

  “Back to his room. I thought your brother was gay.”

  “She’s an old friend of Taro’s and would have known to leave and not enter his room. Taro’s only into men. But if Taro had a man draped over him, a war would have started.”

  I snorted. “Yeah, I could see that happenin’.”

  Bigoted fucks.

  “Am I interrupting something?”

  We jolted apart like we’d been caught making out by our parents. Only it was Wolf standing in the library doorway, glaring at us.

  “No, you’re not,” Mimi said with a grin. “Come join us for a drink, aniki.”

  His eyes softened. “Of course.” He stepped into the room and made his way over to the bar. His gaze dropped to Mimi’s hand on my arm and how mine still covered hers. Was he worried his sister and I would start things back up again, and he didn’t like it?

  Wolf curled his arm across Mimi’s chest and pulled her back into his arms, kissing her temple. “It is good to see you in this house again, shisutā.”

  Her hands lifted to grip his arm. “It’s good to be here, with you.”

  “What’s that you call each other?”

  “Aniki and shisutā?” Wolf asked.

  “Yeah.”

  “Brother and sister.”

  I nodded. “Sounds cool when you say it.”

  “Who, me or my sister?” Wolf asked, a smirk playing on his lips.

  Rolling my eyes, I replied, “Never mind.”

  “What about if I speak to you in Japanese, will it turn you on?”

  I snorted. “No. Again, I ain’t into guys.”

  Mimi slapped her brother’s arm. “Stop teasing.”

  “Shikashi watashi wa sore ga sukidesu.”

  I didn’t know what he said, and I’d never admit it to him, but it sounded good. Instead, I kept his gaze and took a sip of my drink.

  Wolf laughed as he nodded to my glass. “Can I have a sip?”

  I scowled. “Get your own.”

  “But your mouth hasn’t been on any of those.”

  What the fuck?

  “Shall I leave the two of you alone?” Mimi asked teasingly.

  “No,” I blurted.

  “Yes,” Wolf said.

  “No,” I clipped.

  “Yes. I could go all night. Just ask me.” Wolf winked.

  “Can we go back to when you were threatening me?” I suggested. It was easier then. I didn’t know if he found me attractive and wanted me. Because seriously, the guy flirted like it was his own language. If I was into guys, his flirting could have worked; instead, it just twisted my gut, since he wasn’t getting the hint I wasn’t into it.

  I didn’t do dicks. I liked sliding into warm, tight wetness.

  That’s what arseholes are for. With added lube.

  Jesus, shut up, brain.

  Yes, anal was good, but a vag was better because along with it, there were curves, breasts, hair. Okay, the dude before me had hair. Long, dark hair that was draped around his shoulders. When did he take it out from the tie?

  Nope. I didn’t care. Where the fuck was I going with that thought?

  Wolf kissed Mimi’s temple again and moved to make himself a drink. “If you like threats, Ruin, I can give you some.”

  Shit, where was he going with this? My gut twisted again.

  He smirked. “Depends how kinky you are—”

  Groaning, I announced, “I’m out.” I put my glass on the bar, making my way towards the door. Both those fuckers behind me laughed.

  “I’m only teasing, Ruin. Come back.”

  I shook my head. “Nope. I need sleep anyway.” As soon as I said it, I winced.

  “Is that an invite?” Wolf asked.

  I shot the middle finger over my shoulder.

  “Very well, I get the hint. Mimi dear, Mother has been asking for you.”

  I stopped at the door and looked back. I caught Mimi’s gaze. “You good?”

  She smiled and nodded. “I am, thanks. Get some rest. Wolf will go with me.”

  “I will.”

  I gave them a chin lift and walked out the library before Wolf could say anything more.

  When I’d first met him, he’d seemed closed off, cold. I never would have expected a goddamn flirt lay underneath. The things he’d said… Christ, I didn’t know how to take them, and you’d think I would, since I was brought up around Julian.

  Julian was an over-the-top flamboyant gay man related to the Marcus family by being Zara’s brother’s man. The things that would come out of his mouth were surprising but fucking funny. Especially when he’d give the old brothers in the club hell. He meant nothing by it, because he was completely devoted to Mattie, and they had a daughter together. So maybe Wolf was like Julian, though not as flamboyant, but all talk and no action, meaning he didn’t mean anything he said to me.

  Yeah, that was it.

  He was just messing with m
e.

  Hell, I could let the flirting happen and think nothing of it. If only my gut would quit twisting in a way I didn’t understand every time he said something or looked at me with interest. Shit, was I a homophobic prick? Well, not in general, because I didn’t care where people got their love from, as long as they were happy. Like Beast and Knife, Julian and Mattie. Even Pick and Billy who were with Josie; but was my gut reacting in a way where it didn’t like what Wolf was doing?

  Scrubbing a hand over my face, I groaned because I didn’t have a fucking clue.

  Guess I’d see with time.

  Then again, we may not be around for much longer, so I wouldn’t see Wolf again. Probably for the best. The guy was all right enough, ran his family well, but there was still something about him I wasn’t sure about.

  His dark eyes flashed into my mind. Was that it? Something in them I didn’t trust?

  Opening the door to my bedroom, I beelined for the bed and stripped out of my clothes. I needed sleep, desperately. Maybe my head would be clearer in the morning, and Wolf’s ways wouldn’t get to me so much.

  Chapter Five

  Ruin

  Early in the morning a few days later, I stood outside the door to the master suite. Mimi had been woken to see her father while he was lucid. If I had my way, I wouldn’t be there, but Mimi had barged into my room and asked me to come along, to wait until she spoke with him. She needed support, and I would give it to her. I’d give her anything she asked for because I’d come to care for her like a sister. Wolf was with her, along with their mother. She had her family at her back, but I could understand wanting more from me. If I was in her situation, I’d want a person around who I was used to.

  Since I’d fucked up, we weren’t that close, but I was her comfort blanket from home, and she did see Ballarat as her home. I knew that much.

  Voices rose from behind the closed door, and I fisted my hands when I heard roared, “You disgust me. You are no child of mine.”

  Fuck.

  Other voices intervened, and the tone went lower where I couldn’t hear what was being said. Still, I wanted to march in there and tell this fucker to stop being a bitch to his own daughter. Mimi didn’t need this. Not the hate when all she wanted to do was reconcile things before he died.

  I caught the guards’ gazes from across the hallway. Five of them. Ryo, who waited for Wolf as his personal guard, another one was there to watch over the dad, and two waited for Wolf’s mum and Mimi. The last I’d seen around a lot when I’d wandered around the place because he’d been not far behind me every time I moved out of my room. When I asked about the guard on the walk to the room, Wolf informed me that Botan was my personal guard while I stayed under his roof.

  Through clenched teeth, I’d informed him, “I can take care of myself.”

  Wolf had winked and said, “He’s there as a just-in-case scenario. I wouldn’t want anything to happen to you from someone on my side.”

  “Again, I can take care of myself.”

  When his gaze scanned my body, my gut had twisted. Wolf then smirked. “I know.” And that was all he said before we stopped outside the suite and they went in.

  Botan stared back now, and I wanted to ask him if he was there to protect me—scoff—or to keep an eye on me because they didn’t trust me. If it was the second thing, I couldn’t blame him. I was a stranger in their house at a time when even I wouldn’t want an outsider around. Although, if it was because he didn’t trust me, why not just say it instead of implying I couldn’t take care of myself?

  Fuck me.

  I was overthinking again.

  Whatever it was, I couldn’t complain because it wasn’t my place. I was there for Mimi, to protect her, and I really wanted to protect her against her father as his voice rose once again with more harsh words.

  When I turned towards the door, Ryo called, “Don’t.”

  Facing him, I crossed my arms over my chest. “Why the fuck not?” I waved a hand at the door. “He’s cutting her with each fuckin’ word. I’m here to protect her, even from shit like that.”

  It was then Wolf’s voice rose from within the suite. “Silence. If this is the last time you speak with your own daughter, is this how you want her to remember you? A heartless bastard ruled by work?”

  “That is why,” Ryo said. “You are an outsider. Walking in there would have been the worst you could have done for Mimi. You don’t know him enough, but Wolf will protect his sister, even from her father and his words.”

  “He took his damn time,” I grumbled because I didn’t want to see Wolf as a good guy.

  “He knows when to intervene. He did not rule this family because of inheritance. Even his father saw how cutthroat he could be. He plays it smart when needed.”

  “He is a good sama,” Botan commented with a glare my way.

  The doors behind me opened with a rush, and in the next second, I had a crying woman in my arms.

  “Fuck, babe. You’re okay. I got you.”

  Mimi’s whole body shook as she gripped the back of my tee. I lifted my gaze as an older version of Mimi stepped through the doors before Wolf closed them with him still inside. His gaze hard, his jaw clenched. My guess, he’d be having more words with his father.

  “I t-tried to get him to understand.” She sobbed into my chest. With a hand to her waist, I rested my other one at the back of her head, gently holding her to me.

  “Understand what?”

  “T-That the man h-he bargained me with sold his women to other men to use. T-That he b-beat them.”

  Christ. Motherfucking Christ. The fucker still didn’t listen to reason about why she ran, even after knowing what would have happened to his own daughter if they went ahead with the trade.

  Anger boiled my blood. My body twitched. I wanted to go in there and end his life for him, in a bloody mess.

  “Musume,” the mum uttered, resting her hands on Mimi’s shoulders. Mimi turned abruptly and pushed her face into her mum’s shoulder. “My sweet girl, let’s go to your room.” I caught Mimi nod into her shoulder. “Ryo?”

  “Your guards will follow. I’ll inform Wolf when he’s out.”

  “Mimi?” I asked, not sure if I followed or not.

  Mimi lifted her face, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I’ll see you soon?”

  It meant she wanted time with her mum, and I completely understood. I nodded. “You got it.”

  They started down the hall, and I faced Ryo. With a snarl, I asked, “There a gym in here?”

  “Botan will show you.”

  Good. I needed to work off some of this aggression, or I would go in that room and kill the cunt. I didn’t give a shit that he was dying already. Not when he was breaking Mimi’s heart all over again.

  My gut grumbled again. I rubbed at it as I walked into the kitchen, having missed breakfast. I was happy to help myself, because I’d needed that workout and a shower more than food.

  Botan stepped into the kitchen when I got to the refrigerator and opened it.

  “Want anythin’?”

  “No.”

  It was fine with me, since the guy annoyed me for even being there in the first place. Guess I could stop being polite. I pulled out leftovers and found a plate after searching through too many damn cupboards, all without the help of Botan. I didn’t have a clue what the foods were, but they smelled fantastic, and as soon as I got it heated and in my mouth, my gut thanked me.

  I stood at the sink, eyes out the window to the overcast day, and wondered if Mimi could use a day out instead of sticking around here. I knew I could, and I’d been meaning to go to the Caroline Springs charter since arriving.

  I’d been in contact with brothers from the charter, and all kept asking when I was going to drop in. Could be a good distraction for Mimi this afternoon.

  Hands at my waist had me dropping the plate to the counter with a clatter, jumping around, and hitting my arse against the counter. Wolf’s eyes lit with humour as he took a step forward.
I glanced over his shoulder as my gut twisted.

  “I sent him away,” Wolf said softly, and before I could react, his body heat rested against my front, his hands back on my waist, and his lips moved to my neck where he kissed.

  I froze.

  Fucking froze except for my eyes shooting wide. “What are you doin’?”

  I felt his lips smile against my skin. “Giving you a good morning kiss.”

  Pressing my hands to his shoulders, I shoved him back. “Fuck off,” I clipped, screwing my nose up.

  Wolf straightened, lips thinned, and he took a step back while he studied me. I knew he’d see my chest rising and falling rapidly, but it was because he’d scared the hell out of me—the silent ninja prick.

  It had nothing to do with my skin still burning where his lips had been.

  Nothing.

  Wolf’s expression blanked, and he walked to the coffee machine. “Relax, Ruin. I was messing with you.”

  I didn’t know what to say, because now I felt like a prick for telling him to fuck off. The blank expression didn’t sit well with me, which was strange. Why did I care? I didn’t know the guy. Yet even when it didn’t sit well, I couldn’t bring myself to say or do anything for his coldness to stop.

  He didn’t say anything more either. I picked up my plate, finished the food on it, and watched as he made his coffee. He then walked out of the room without saying another word.

  Botan stood in the kitchen doorway in the next moment, and there was an extra edge to his glare at me.

  I returned it because I hadn’t done anything wrong. Wolf had scared me, I’d reacted, but who gave the guy the right to do that in the first place? I’d said I wasn’t into guys, yet there was Wolf all up in my grill, touching me, kissing my skin, like I was something to him.

  That was… wrong.

  I wasn’t anything to him.

  I didn’t want to be anything to him.