Before she could think of something to say, Jake appeared, a scowl still on his face. “Merry Christmas, you two. Have you been enjoying your morning?”
“Yes, we’ve been chatting away,” Thalia replied, smoothing her slender hands over the book she’d been reading when Lily came in.
“I see Lily has been schooling you on her favorite subject. She is quite the expert on both pride and prejudice.”
Lily furrowed her brow, only then noticing his grandmother had been reading a copy of Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice. She rolled her eyes at his attempt at sarcasm.
“It’s too bad you weren’t reading Sense and Sensibility, Thalia. Sometimes Jake could use a bit of both.”
Thalia laughed as Jake’s scowl deepened. “I think perhaps you both could use a little Persuasion. Anything to get you in a festive mood before tonight.”
Jake’s harsh demeanor lifted. “The two of you have decided to band together. How am I supposed to compete with that?”
“You’re not, darling.” Thalia smiled up at him, adoration evident in her gaze. “Just appreciate that we get on so well. I can’t wait to introduce her to everyone.”
“What happens tonight?” Lily asked.
“My grandmother invites everyone she knows to dinner and tells them how wonderful I am. It’s the highlight of her year, isn’t it?”
“I’m not as bad as all that usually, but this year you’ll have to forgive me. My grandson is getting married, and I’m thrilled.” She folded her hands in her lap and turned to Lily. “We’ll exchange our gifts before everyone else arrives. In fact, with so much to look forward to, I think I’ll have a rest now. I want to be fresh for tonight.”
“Would you like me to help you?” Lily asked, concerned since the nurse was absent.
“No need, dear.” She accepted Jake’s arm as she stood and then smiled at them both. “Besides, I think the two of you need some time to yourselves.”
Lily forced a smile, knowing what she wanted was anything but time alone with Jake, especially with her mind so muddled.
…
“I’m going to check out a few properties on a neighboring island tomorrow, and we’ll fly home the next day. I’m sure you’re in a hurry to get away.” Jake wrapped his hands on the railing and looked out without seeing anything. His mind hadn’t stopped working since last night, and he was still no closer to a solution. He’d hoped looking in on the families that kept an eye on his grandmother might shine a light on his own problems, but they’d only darkened his mood.
“There’s no need to rush back on my account. Unless there’s something you need to do, someone you need to see.”
He turned around, pinning her to the chair with his gaze. “Is there something you want to ask me, Lily? Or would you rather be cool and flippant? I suppose it doesn’t matter since you make up your own story anyway.”
“What would you have me do? Live in the dark? You obviously don’t trust me with the truth.”
“You don’t trust me at all, so I suppose that makes us even.”
“Yes, we do seem to be equally miserable, don’t we?” She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth in a gesture he’d come to learn meant she had more to say, so he waited until she spoke again.
“Your grandmother told me about your father.”
He nodded and narrowed his eyes. “Is that why you were sitting with her, pumping her for information so you could be justified in thinking me beneath your notice? I told you he was a troll. Did you need more details than that?”
“Would you stop putting words in my mouth? I’m not some elitist using that as an excuse not to marry you. You don’t love me, and you never will. It’s as simple as that.” Lily stood, smoothing the wrinkles from her white slacks. “I was merely going to ask why you feel responsible for so many. I don’t understand why you hold yourself accountable for others.”
Jake watched her as she stood perfectly still and poised, as if she hadn’t asked the hardest question he’d ever had to answer. “What exactly did my grandmother tell you?”
“Enough so that I know you only tell me what suits you. I do find it strange that you can rail at me for acting jealous about Mikayla and then turn around and instigate it by saying you’re going out with her.”
“I did—”
“Drive her to her parents’ house? Really, Jake, your definition of the truth needs a little work. You said you would always be honest with me, but can you even count the number of times you’ve lied?”
He shook his head. “I’ve never lied to you. Some of your invented stories have been so ridiculous they didn’t deserve a rebuttal. It’s not my fault if you believe your own fiction.”
“I suppose the blame is all mine. I’ve known better from the beginning. I think your grandmother had the right idea. I’d like to rest before the party tonight.”
She walked past him, and he fought the urge to grab her, to communicate with her on the one level they always connected on. But he couldn’t, not trusting himself to stop before it went too far.
“Jake?” He looked up at Lily as she stood, one hand on the glass door leading inside. “I need to know how to act at the party. Will we be pretending to be in love tonight?”
For the first time in over a decade, he felt a pressure behind his eyes and a betraying tightness in his throat. Instead of speaking, he shook his head and turned around, wondering just how he could have allowed one small woman to bring him so low.
…
Lily watched the sun bounce on the surface of the sea, looking for answers she knew she’d never find. Jake Tolliver was an enigma, and trying to understand him or how she felt about him only led to a headache. And heartbreak.
She turned back to the room, checking her reflection in the full-length mirror angled against one wall. The cream pleated chiffon of her dress swirled to mid-thigh, a black satin bow highlighting the empire waist. Even with her hair twisted to one side, she thought she looked too young. Youth could be an asset, but it seemed to make Jake’s women dismiss her on sight. Really, what she needed was a tight red number, but spending money on clothes was out of the question right now. Besides, Hawaii was more casual than most places, and she was here to meet his grandmother, after all.
She didn’t need to worry about Jake’s women dismissing her. He seemed to have done that himself. It cut like a knife, but she knew it was for the best for them both. Now that she knew more about his past, she knew he’d never be able to give up the others, never be able to commit himself fully to one person.
Jake had never had a single person to trust, had never been shown how to rely on anyone but himself, while she’d spent a lifetime trusting others to care for her and indulging herself. The last few months had turned that on its ear, but she was an intrinsically trusting person. So much so she sometimes forgot to protect herself from what she felt for Jake.
Not that it would matter now. He’d given up his relentless pursuit. Lily walked to the bed where she’d laid out the gifts she’d brought, her mind falling back to the thoughtful gifts Jake had bought her in the past. This was the first time she’d ever had anything to give him in return.
Laughter in the other room caught her attention. Mikayla’s trill laugh wafted through the walls, and Lily steeled herself against the night. She knew how to do this, mingle at parties and pretend to be having the time of her life. What she was unsure of as she gathered the gifts was how to keep Jake believing she was as indifferent to him as he thought while Mikayla wrapped herself around him.
Lord help her, she was jealous. And in love. A feeling as unknown and exhilarating as it was dangerous. She was about to act the part for the world, while maintaining her indifference to the man she loved. An actress with a shelf of awards would probably be just as nervous as she made her way to the great room.
Of course, Mikayla stood next to Jake, her hand on his arm as she posed in an exquisite emerald gown. To his credit, he excused himself from the situation and was by Lily’s side
with a glass of champagne by the time she’d set her gifts next to the others on the table.
“We should have a toast before the crowd arrives.” The resignation in his voice rang oddly in her ears. She took the glass from him, her fingers tingling where they touched.
“It’s not a crowd, Jakob. Just my closest friends.” Thalia grinned from her chair.
“You have over a hundred close friends, and those are just the ones coming tonight.” He pasted on an indulgent smile, but Lily could tell it was forced.
“Really, Jakob. You’re going to scare Lilianna.”
The corner of his mouth twitched. “Lily doesn’t scare easily. She may look slight, but she can work a crowd of socialites better than both of us combined. Too bad it’s Christmas, or you could have had her bleeding the wallets of everyone for your literacy project.”
Lily pursed her lips together, unsure what to make of the backhanded compliment. “I don’t make anyone’s wallet bleed.”
His gaze dripped over her from head to toe, making her squirm in her kitten heels. “You make people think huge donations are their idea, so I’m sure they don’t notice. At least the husbands don’t.”
Thalia laughed, cutting the tension. “A fool and his money are soon parted, right dear? Especially when the man has enough money to do some good. It’s one of the finer points of fundraising.”
Jake looked from his grandmother to Lily and smiled, a true one this time. “I’m never going to win between the two of you, am I? All right then, we’ll drink to that. Lily, what was the toast your father did?”
Her throat thickened as the image of her father looking down from the staircase on their guests at last year’s party flashed in her mind. She put the staggering wave of emotion aside and lifted her glass.
“May you never forget what is worth remembering, and never remember what is best forgotten.” They all took a sip, which gave Lily a chance to step out of her grief.
“Now for my favorite part,” Thalia said. “The presents.”
“I think that is everyone’s favorite part of Christmas.” Lily passed out her gifts as everyone took a seat on the sofas. When Thalia opened the package, her eyes welled up as she stared at the silver frame.
“How did you manage such a lovely portrait? Jakob hates to have his picture taken.”
Lily grinned, watching as Jake stretched to see the picture she’d given his grandmother. “It’s from a benefit ball last year. I don’t think he knew it was being taken.”
“I didn’t.” He leaned back in the seat next to her and lowered his voice. “I was too busy looking at you.”
Her cheeks heated at the insinuation. Lily took the last of her gifts from the table and handed the oblong package to him.
“You got me something?” Jake said under his breath.
“It’s about time, don’t you think?” she whispered back.
He stared at her with a bewildered expression that shamed her to her core. After all he’d been through, having been so coldly treated by her in the past had to have been an icy slap in the face. She hadn’t known, and she couldn’t take it back, but she wanted to all the same.
He peeled back the silver paper with precision. Each second was torturous as she waited to see if she’d done the right thing. Jake lifted the stacked frames from the paper and set them side by side on his lap, never saying a word.
Finally, Lily couldn’t take it anymore. “It’s just a print. I didn’t damage the original. I promise.”
“What is it, Jakob?” Thalia asked, leaning forward. Mikayla followed suit.
Jake turned the frames to face the other women. “It’s the floor plans and renderings of the house, the originals on one, and a remodel idea I had on the other.”
“That house is huge,” Mikayla exclaimed. If Lily hadn’t been so worried by Jake’s reaction, she might have smiled.
“It’s gorgeous.” Thalia reached out for the frames, so he set them in front of her. “Why are you changing it?”
He opened his mouth to respond but shut it again and turned, his gaze piercing through Lily. “The house isn’t set up for a family, so one day I played with moving the master suite upstairs. Where did you find the plans?”
“In your desk at the penthouse. Planning needed the River House designs, and I knew you’d taken them home, so I had to go find them and came across these at the same time.” She pressed her fingernails into her palms, trying not to panic. Even if he were truly angry at the intrusion, he wouldn’t yell at her in front of his grandmother. Would he? “I thought you could hang these at the penthouse so you could think of the house while you’re in town during the week.”
“Do you like the changes?” There was a pensive gleam to his eyes, an anxiety in his tone she never would have imagined him capable of if she hadn’t witnessed it.
Lily raised one shoulder. “I’m used to my bedroom the way it is, but you do have a point. It was fine for me because Emmaline slept upstairs when I was younger, but without a nanny, it could be quite the hassle.”
“Yes. You’d wind up staying upstairs with the baby, and I’d be alone.”
Lily opened her mouth in shock, taken aback as Jake covered her mouth with his own. The gentleness of his lips on hers was an equal surprise. She didn’t mind a bit that he’d done it in front of Mikayla, but she worried about what his grandmother might think. The restraint in the kiss made her want to deepen it and relieve the hostility between them, but she didn’t dare for more reasons than she could count.
Still reeling from the kiss, she barely noticed what the others gave or received. Thalia’s gift of a bracelet linked with gold Plumeria blossoms touched her heart, and would always help her remember Hawaii. Jake gave her earrings that matched the diamond necklace.
Guests began to arrive before she got her head together. Thalia kept her close, introducing her to more people than she’d ever be able to remember. The Christmas gathering became a celebration of the engagement that wasn’t real, and if she hadn’t been so busy, she might have rued the bittersweet event. As it was, the activity was just the cure for her emotional day. She was too busy trying to make conversation and remember how the families fit together to worry about how she felt about missing her parents, Jake’s kiss, or how life would change when she went home.
Her feet were aching by the time she felt Jake’s hand on her arm propelling her to the secluded lanai. Lily was thankful for the fresh air and the chance to sit in quiet for a moment. Jake’s intent stare made her nervous, so she didn’t want to indulge for too long.
“We should get back inside. People will wonder what happened to us.” She watched him warily as he sat down beside her.
“No, they won’t. We just announced our engagement. Disappearing together is par for the course.” The grin on his face aroused old fears and insecurities. She’d thought him too angry to continue pursuing her, but his actions tonight seemed more genuine than forced. Really, she’d never know where she stood with him until they were miles apart.
“The engagement is to make Thalia happy, so we should go in and do that.” Lily tried to get up, but he stopped her with a hand on her thigh.
“I’m having a hard time with it. I need another minute.”
Maybe he didn’t lie as smoothly as she thought. “We can tell her the truth after they all leave if it’s bothering you. That way it will be in person.”
He narrowed his eyes. “Not that. I don’t like the way men look at you. I honestly thought a ring on your finger would help.”
“You did?” Her voice rose in surprise.
“I know men aren’t always the most scrupulous, but, yes, I thought it would get rid of this feeling.” He rolled his shoulders and stretched his long legs in front of him, as if he could release his discomfort like a tight muscle.
“What feeling is that?” Lily asked, truly confused now.
“Like I need to put myself between you and every other man in the room.” His voice was gruff, as if he were disgusted with h
imself.
“It’s probably your own guilt you’re feeling.” Lily picked at the pleats of her dress.
“I don’t have anything to feel guilty for.”
“Your conscience seems to think otherwise.” She smiled, hoping she didn’t sound chastising. She understood now why he’d never be able to put all his faith in one person, but that didn’t mean she approved. “I don’t want to fight about this today. Christmas is a holiday, and I think we should take a break from bickering as well.”
“Agreed.” Jake smoothed his hand along her temple and around the back of her head.
Her instinct was to pull away, but her side-swept hair was only held in place by two combs. She’d have to walk back through the house disheveled if he undid it, and since that was probably what he wanted, she stayed still.
“I’m going to be very rude, and you’re going to have to get over it.”
“Am I really?”
He cleared his throat. “How did you afford Christmas gifts?”
She blinked at his bluntness and squared her shoulders. “I have a job. I didn’t steal them if that’s what you’re thinking.”
He loomed over her in the moonlight, his shadow covering her completely. “Of course you didn’t. But you haven’t paid your tuition completely, and they’re holding your diploma until you do. I paid you enough to cover it. I expected you to use the credit card I gave you for everything else.”
“You have no right to be looking into my account with the university.” She tried to bat away the hand that held her, but he caught her attempt with his free one.
“You earned that degree, and I’m not going to let something as trivial as money stand in the way of it.”
“I have it taken care of.”
“How?” His direct gaze showed her neither of them was moving until he got his answer.
“I’m going to sell some of my jewelry to pay it off. I don’t need all of it, so downsizing is in order anyway. I should get enough to pay tuition and get an apartment.”
The Billionaire's Reluctant Fiancee (Invested in Love) Page 14
