Destiny

by Amanda Lynn Petrin

  “It was a long recovery. Eventually everything healed, although the black remained.”

  “They say that eyes are the windows to the soul.” I don’t know why she said it, but the idea seemed to intrigue him.

  “And what do you see in mine?” he said it low, like a whisper, only there was something excitingly dangerous in it.

  She looked carefully before admitting, “All I see is myself.” She laughed, but he looked happy with her answer.

  “And I pray that is how it always will be.”

  I woke up from another memory dream and couldn’t get back to sleep. It was earlier than the teenager in me on summer vacation wanted to, but it was hopefully early enough that I could talk to Embry about the memory I saw yesterday.

  He was alone at the kitchen table, sipping an espresso. There were two slices of toast with peanut butter and sliced bananas at the spot beside him. But Embry hated bananas.

  “I heard you getting dressed,” he told my confused look.

  “You knew I was coming?” I sat down and took a bite, savoring my toast and discovering a hint of cinnamon.

  “I wondered what you would see once we got here. It’s one of the main reasons I chose it, but I knew you would eventually see other things as well.”

  “I don’t only see them,” I reminded him.

  “Hence the apology breakfast,” he told me, getting a smile. I could tell he was hesitating to ask, possibly not wanting to scar me any further, but he also wanted to know.

  “It was your anniversary,” I shared, making his eyes go wide.

  “Which one?” he asked. Part of me wanted to know what elaborate plans he put into action over the years, but I did not want to live through them, so I didn’t ask.

  “Fifth.” I picked up the second toast.

  For a moment he was lost in the memory, then he smiled. “Helen had a nightmare and slept in the bed with us.” He got up to make himself another espresso, relieved.

  “Which is the only reason I can still sit here beside you and look you in the eyes.”

  “How is it when it happens? Do you hear their thoughts and know all their secrets, or…”

  “It’s weird,” I tried to find a way to explain it. “I don’t have access to all of their thoughts and memories, just from those moments. I’m still me, but I see what they’re seeing, and feel what they feel...”

  “I’m sorry…”

  “That too, but I meant emotions. Like I didn’t know who she was waiting for in the closet, but I knew she was excited to see them more than annoyed that they were taking so long, and that whoever it was, she loved them. With all her heart. I haven’t seen any of them that happy yet.”

  “Thank you,” he said like it meant a lot, but I don’t think he needed me to tell him how she felt. I looked at him expectantly, but he was satisfied with the conversation and ready to move on. “What?” he asked when I looked at him with a mix of guilt and curiosity.

  “I didn’t see you naked, but I still have a million questions.”

  He nearly choked on his coffee before looking at me with a huge smile, “I forgot about that part.”

  “The part where you never told me you were married to Beth?” I put it plainly.

  “Keep it down,” he warned.

  I looked at him with confusion before I realized, “Gabriel doesn’t know?”

  “He might suspect there was something. He knows we were close, but no, he does not know the full extent of our relationship.”

  “Five years,” I pointed out.

  “When Beth’s husband, David, died, we both came to the funeral. Gabriel stayed a couple of weeks, but it was his turn to be the guardian of the new safe house. I offered to stay and help her get things settled, and…we fell in love. When Gabriel came back to check on her, I was still there, so he stayed away.”

  “You guys are ridiculous. Do you even know why you’re fighting?”

  “Time heals things when you move on, not when you spend your life being reminded of it and waiting for her to come back.” There was a sadness to him as he said it, but he wasn’t talking about himself.

  I could tell he didn’t want me to push, so I moved on to the big question I was holding back, ever since I saw the memory of Beth discovering the Prophecy. “I saw something else a while ago that I didn’t know how to bring up, but…”

  “What is it?” he reassured me that I could ask him anything, but I knew my question would break his heart, whether it was his baby or not.

  “In the memory that made me fall out of the tree, Beth…”

  “Did you tell her?” Gabriel walked into the kitchen and silenced me. My heart stopped, wondering how much he heard.

  “Tell me what?” I asked once I realized he was talking to Embry about something completely unrelated. Embry looked guilty instead of relieved as I would have expected.

  “We discussed it, and since you don’t want to be left behind, we’re going to train you,” Gabriel shared.

  “Really?” I perked up and finished my toast.

  “Don’t get too excited,” Embry warned.

  “I don’t know what happened in the washroom,” I caught on.

  “Annabelle could do magic,” Gabriel admitted, looking at me with guilt in his eyes.

  “She was a witch?” I tried to remember exactly what he told me at the plantation. “You said she was burnt at the stake, but she was innocent.”

  “Of the crimes they were accusing her of. Not necessarily of witchcraft,” he used a technicality, but it was still a lie. “The night before she died, she did a spell to track the men who were after her, to see how close they were to finding us.”

  “And…” I wondered if she fought them with her supposed powers, but Embry was looking at Gabriel as expectantly as I was.

  “They were close, so she turned herself in,” Gabriel said like that was the end of it.

  “One spell doesn’t mean anything,” I decided. “Have any of the Bearers since Annabelle demonstrated any kind of magical ability?”

  “No one has tried,” Gabriel gave me a look. He wasn’t mentioning it, but we both knew what happened in the washroom either meant I was Gifted or a witch. Since I didn’t die, the obvious answer was that I take after Annabelle in the magic department.

  “I don’t want to try either,” I turned them down. “Why don’t you teach me how to fight with weapons, and then we can see how it goes?” I offered.

  “You feel more comfortable getting close to people with weapons?” Embry asked, surprised.

  “I can control the weapons.” I couldn’t say as much for my hands.

  “You can learn to control the magic too.” Embry put his hand on mine, showing me he didn’t fear them like I did. “We’re no match for the people that are hunting you, but if you can control your powers, you might be.”

  I did want to learn to fight back against Donovan and his master, to make sure they couldn’t hurt anyone else the way they hurt Sam, but I couldn’t imagine I would be a match for them. “Are you going to teach me?” I raised my eyebrows at Embry.

  “I can show you how Annabelle did her tracking spell, but we don’t have that kind of magic.” Gabriel handed me a book he’d brought from upstairs. “But that is why we have her Shadow Book.”

  “Book of Shadows,” Embry corrected, but I focused on Gabriel.

  “If you’re uncomfortable, we can stop, but there has to be a reason you have this, and wouldn’t you rather be able to control it next time?” He kept his eyes locked on mine in earnest, until I had to look away.

  “Okay,” I reluctantly agreed. I never wanted my hands to betray me like that again. It would also be nice to get ahead of the bad guys for once. To actually stand a chance at defeating them without losing even more people.

  “We can go out into the yard and try some easy, simple spells. Work our way up, okay?” Gabriel offered.

  “Okay,” I repeated, following him when he got up and headed for the patio doors. “You’re not comin
g?” I asked Embry when he stayed back, bringing our dirty plates to the sink.

  “He has even less experience with it than I do,” Gabriel assured me with an encouraging smile, but nothing about that statement made me feel better.

  “I’ll be around,” Embry nodded for me to go.

  “What exactly am I doing?” I asked Gabriel when we got to a blanket on the grass. It was like a picnic, only there were maps, crystals and a book instead of food and wine.

  “I saw her doing a tracking spell, so I figured we could start with that.” He sat down cross-legged and took out a map.

  “Who am I looking for?” I asked.

  “We could look for Donovan to make sure he isn’t anywhere near us,” he suggested.

  “Would that mean he could track me?” I was not a fan of that scenario.

  “According to Annabelle, there’s map tracking and essence tracking. As long as we only do map tracking, you’ll be fine.”

  “Couldn’t Donovan trick a tracking spell? With a cloaking spell?” I asked.

  “Is that something you read in the books? Or saw on TV?” he was amused by the question.

  “There’s no magic in the Chronicles and I haven’t read the Book of Shadows,” I gave him the answer. “Even if it was on TV, it still makes sense.”

  “I’m sure you can, but I doubt they would be using one. We have never hunted them back, or posed any kind of threat,” he pointed out.

  “You think this will work?” I asked, eying the candles he lit and placed around a map of the world. “Even if I have no skills whatsoever?”

  “The way Annabelle explained it, magic wasn’t a skill she had to practice or cultivate to use. If you had it in you and did the right thing, or said the right words, something would happen.” As he spoke, he took a piece of paper and started drawing on it with a pencil, fast strokes with a sure hand. It wasn’t until he handed it to me that I saw it was of Donovan, accurate enough to give me chills.

  “Don’t get your hopes up,” I warned, following the book’s instructions by tying a string around one of the crystals and holding it in my right hand. The roughly drawn sketch of Donovan’s face was on my left palm. “Inveniet Donovan.”

  I closed my eyes and repeated the words, picturing him in my head and feeling the hairs on the back of my neck tense up. I felt like an absolute idiot and was terrified of what I might find out.

  “It’s okay, relax your mind and think of Donovan,” Gabriel encouraged. He sounded supportive, not at all upset it wasn’t working, but I did not have his confidence.

  I tried to clear my mind, but every time I pictured Donovan, I either saw him giving the order for his man to slit Sam’s throat, or threatening to cut off every one of Clara’s freckles…one time I saw Donovan, surrounded by darkness, but he had such an ominous look that I completely shut down and needed to start all over again.

  After at least a half an hour of trying with no success, Gabriel decided we should attempt a different spell, and flipped to one of the first pages in the book. The entire spread was covered in writing on how to make objects float.

  “Can I have a water break?” I asked, feeling overwhelmed. I wasn’t used to being bad at learning things, or to accepting magic as a real thing.

  “I’ll go get you a glass. Try and relax. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself,” he gave me an encouraging smile before going to the house.

  “How’s it going?” Embry came over from the stables, where he’d been watching us from for the last fifteen minutes.

  “Terrible. I think we made a mistake and it wasn’t actually me who made her disappear.”

  “Or it came to you when you needed it, but you haven’t figured out how to get it when you want it,” he argued. “Unless you don’t want it?”

  “No, I love turning someone’s grandmother into a pile of ash during their Sunday brunch,” I hid behind sarcasm. He raised an eyebrow when I said grandmother, but otherwise saw right through me.

  “I know it’s scary. Beth told me she was terrified the first time it happened to her,” he shared, expecting my shocked reaction.

  “Did she ever figure it out?” I asked. It made sense that free-spirited Beth who wrote of superstitions and lived in New Orleans would have inherited the magic as well.

  “Of course. You will too,” he nodded to reassure me.

  “What did she do?”

  “Lots of research,” he gave me a smile. “Once she was making things happen rather than having things happen to her, it was a lot less scary.”

  “This isn’t something I can read a book to solve,” I argued with his logic.

  “Maybe not any book, but the Book of Shadows can definitely help. It will teach you spells that you can master, to help you control your magic instead of it controlling you.”

  “Mind over matter?” I brought my hand to my head, applying pressure to relieve the beginning of a headache.

  “Or practice makes perfect.”

  “I’m trying to practice but nothing’s happening.”

  “It helps if you’re not convincing yourself you can’t do it.”

  “I’m not convincing myself; my incapability is convincing me,” I argued. He raised an eyebrow at me and waited. “I also don’t want to find him. When I think of him…all I feel is fear, and then I think of Sam, and I have to get out of there.”

  “Maybe you should try finding someone you actually want to find,” he suggested. “And believe you can do it. I do.”

  “Gabriel is taking over because Annabelle kept her powers from you, and he saw her do one spell...but I feel like you’re sitting on a lot more experience,” I eyed him expectantly.

  “We didn’t have secrets from each other. And she didn’t just dabble when she was in trouble. It was a way of life in the Quarter.”

  “She was a full-blown witch?” I asked.

  “She helped people,” he didn’t label it.

  “About the other memory…”

  “It’s okay,” he assured me, as I struggled over not wanting to hurt him, but needing to know.

  “Beth was pregnant,” I shared. “I thought it was with Helen, but she was there too.”

  “Our son, Jackson,” he gave me a smile, but his eyes were focused on a memory from the past, not on me.

  I had a million more questions, but Gabriel came back, so Embry retreated to the stables.

  “Ready?” Gabriel handed me the water.

  “I want to try the tracking spell one more time first,” I told him, taking a sip.

  “Of course,” he set everything up for me.

  Instead of Donovan, I pictured Clara laughing and smiling, running around the orchard. I said the words to myself, with my heart yearning to see her and take her in my arms and protect her from all the bad things I brought into her life. The hand that wasn’t holding the string rubbed the plastic ring she gave me for my last birthday.

  All of a sudden, the string tensed so the crystal was no longer dangling, but pointing at a specific location. I looked up from the map, that showed Cape Cod, and saw the horror in Gabriel’s eyes.

  “I have people there, but I’ll send word…” I could see him struggling to find a way to protect them without putting me at risk and realized I should have filled him in on my plans beforehand.

  “It’s okay,” I put my hand on his. “Part of my problem is that I don’t want to see Donovan, so I looked for Clara.”

  “Clara’s the one on the east coast, at the Beach House?” He verified.

  “Looks like.” I couldn’t help but smile that it worked.

  “Not Donovan,” he relaxed a little.

  “I don’t know where he is, but hopefully not.”

  “That’s really smart,” he beamed at me.

  “I had help.” He followed my gaze and saw Embry looking over at us.

  “He does get you,” Gabriel said.

  “I think he might also get this stuff more than you give him credit for.” I was hoping that somewhere along the way
, the two of them would be able to put their differences, or similarities, aside and forgive each other.

  “That’s often the case,” he surprised me. “Don’t get excited,” he warned, noticing the smile that was spreading on my face before I understood he was just stating a fact.

  “Unbelievable,” I shook my head.

  “A three-hundred-year-old habit is hard to break,” he defended himself.

  “Are you even trying?” I brought my palm to my forehead and ran my fingers back through my hair, sighing out my frustration.

  “I’m here, aren’t I?”

  “Because you have to be.”

  “You should have seen us with Rosie.” A shadow passed his face, but was gone as fast as it came. “And Cassie, before she sat us down and gave us a severe talking to,” he smiled at the memory.

  “But it didn’t change anything?”

  “We have been incredibly civil ever since,” he assured me.

  “Maybe try nice and friendly from now on. See how that goes?”

  “I can try,” he said with a shrug.

  “He’s pretty awesome,” I looked over to Embry, who was now sitting on a bushel of hay with Charlie, both of them laughing.

  “I remember,” Gabriel said with a smile, but I could see a hint of sadness over what he lost.

  I rolled my eyes before we worked some more on my tracking spells. We went through all the people I wanted to see, finding them exactly where they were supposed to be, before I finally tried Donovan again. I still didn’t want to see him, but at least I knew it would work if I put myself through the fear.

  I kept my eyes closed, even after the crystal moved.

  “California,” Gabriel checked the map.

  “Then he isn’t coming after us,” I breathed a sigh of relief.

  “Not yet,” he said with an edge. It was only a matter of time.

  Chapter Seven

  Working on spells left me exhausted by the time I got to bed every night, but at least I felt like I was accomplishing things. I couldn’t spend my days reading the Chronicles anymore, so I tried to wake up early and read them over breakfast.