“Well, I don’t know anything about therapy, but there’s Barney. He’s a good old pony, good with kids. Have you thought about riding lessons? How old is she?”
“Five,” Jason said and made a note to talk to his brother about getting Jess riding lessons. Come to think of it, she’d be about the same age as Annette’s boys. “I’ll keep it in mind, and I know you’ll give us a deal when you see what a sweetheart she is.”
“I’m full of surprises, kid,” she said with another knowing smile. “I have got to get going, but don’t be surprised if I stop in later for a bite.” Annette winked as she slid off her stool. She said goodbye to Seth’s torso - head still up in the cabinets, and he gave a brief wave and muffled “Nice to meet you!” Jason watched Annette nearly skip back out to the parking lot. What was she up to?
ANNETTE HAD PICKED up Olivia just after Nan had left for bridge, running up to the porch and embracing her in a warm, intimate hug, like Olivia hadn’t ignored her best friend for the last eight years. What did she do to deserve a friend like that? She let Annette guide her to an old station wagon and now they were seated, drinking coffee at the Waveland Cafe and chatting like old friends. Nan had been right- it was great reconnecting with Annette. It had been almost an hour and Olivia had resisted every urge to ask about Jason, focusing on learning everything she had missed about town and Annette since she’d been gone. Still, Olivia felt it was a bit, improbable that nothing about him ever came up. Maybe he had moved. If Annette wasn’t going to bring up the whole reason she broke ties in the first place, then neither would Olivia.
“Ready for something to eat?” asked Annette, suddenly very cheerful. “I know a good place...new in town.” Maybe Olivia was imagining it, but she could almost hear a puckish grin on her face.
“I don’t know, I should probably go see my parents.” As much as Olivia was enjoying her time with Annette, her fears about running into old acquaintances still lingered.
“Oh no, NO,” you’ve been gone EIGHT years and you can give me this ONE afternoon. Come on, I already paid.” Annette’s guilt trip was working, and Olivia allowed herself to be pulled back into the station wagon. Olivia bent her head back over the headrest and closed her eyes, trying to feel where they were going. Outside the car, Olivia blinked into the bright daylight. It was a parking lot? Annette linked her arm through Olivia’s and started to ramble about people they had known in high school. “You know Jeremy, the one who was dating Sasha?”
But Annette's words were drowned out by a loud, droning buzz in her head, as soon as they walked through the door. Olivia blinked against the sudden light change. It was dim inside, but the smell - the smell brought a thousand memories and feelings up and they swarmed and collided in her brain like angry bees. This was Jason’s bar.
THE LUNCH CROWD WAS dying down, and Jason was back behind the bar, running through the Point of Sales System with his brother. He looked over as a gust of cold wind swept through the downstairs, and with it, the last person he expected to walk through those doors.
He thought he might have to grab the computer terminal for support. Olivia. He had spent the last eight years believing he would never see her again, except in his dream, yet here she was. She looked almost the same as he remembered, the same as he dreamed. Dark glossy hair loose but neat around her shoulders, trim, pressed slacks that skimmed modest heels. Petite perfection. But the way she stared at the ground, the way she clung to Annette - that wasn’t the proud, self-assured Olivia he remembered. Maybe it was a dream. Annette gave him a big smile and started to drag a petrified Olivia towards the bar.
Chapter 6
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, Annette? It was the only rational thought she could hold in her wildly swirling mind. If she had to run into Jason, she didn’t want it to be like this, not while she was so helpless. She quickly smoothed her hair and jacket as Annette dragged her towards what she supposed was the big U-shaped bar downstairs. “Look who it is!” Annette shouted gleefully. Olivia couldn’t tell if this was directed at her or-
“Olivia,” Came a deep, familiar voice. Olivia slid into a bar stool and sat frozen, as a tall, blurry figure stepped closer.
What have you done, Annette? Her best friend had always had a wily side - after all, she nearly single handedly engineered her and Jason’s first date but this. Olivia’s heart was beating wildly, and she desperately wished she had worn some makeup. Were her eyes still red and puffy? She laid her hands flat on the bar top. “Uh, Jason, long time no see...”
“Don’t be a stranger, Jason, come give her a hug!” Annette was much too upbeat for the catastrophe, didn’t she realize what she was doing, the agony she was putting Olivia through. Please don’t hug me, Olivia sent a plea to the heavens, but moments later strong arms pulled her tight, and despite her inner hurricane of emotions, the familiar press of Jason quelled the storm ever so slightly. He was so tall and smelled so much like she remembered. She relaxed slightly and breathed him in. Jason quickly let go and she could tell he was close, still looking at her. She looked at where she guessed his eyes were. At least she couldn’t see his face clearly because she didn’t have the strength to really look him in the eye.
“S-sorry, I have an issue with my eyes...I-” Olivia managed to breath out. Thankfully, Annette took over the explanation. Olivia hardly heard as she struggled to regain her composure. Jason was obviously as gob smacked about this little encounter as she was. He flitted back and forth across the bar as Annette browsed the menu and forced conversation between them. Jason stiffly filled her in on everything that had happened at the restaurant over the last few years, about how his brother was in town helping out. About how his father was healthy but not up to running the place full time. Likewise, Olivia gave as brief of answers as she could get away with. She wanted to get up and run. She felt like an animal in a bear trap, ready to chew her own leg off to make the agony stop.
There were too many memories in this place. Sneaking away to the kitchen late at night to steal a kiss, laughing at the bar with the old factory workers when they were still too young to drink, but not caring a bit. Jason, getting off work smelling like sweat and fries and absolute heaven. Jason, pulling a ring out upstairs...
Olivia tried to shake the thoughts out of her head and concentrated on the other conversations happening at the bar. “...and then Julie says, ‘why don’t you try it and find out!’” Olivia imagined she was at a chic Manhattan restaurant and her coworkers were laughing at something terribly witty she had just said.
A man’s voice suddenly came from behind them. “Excuse me, miss, but what’s a girl like you doing here?” Annette swiveled in her chair to face the stranger.
“By me a drink, handsome?” and they both devolved into laughter. “Olivia, this is my husband, Curtis.”
“Two beautiful women at the bar? It’s my lucky day, nice to meet you.” Olivia could tell Annette had given him a playful punch, then she heard the smack of a kiss. “Hope you girls had fun, are you ready to go, hun?”
Yes, thank you. Olivia had just met Curtis, but she could have kissed him, too. Let’s get out of here, she begged internally.
“Liv, sorry I have to run, I forgot Curtis and I are taking the kids out tonight for BBQ.” Kids, Olivia was momentarily stunned. In all their conversation Annette hadn’t mentioned she had children. You idiot, Olivia chastised herself, are you really so selfish you didn’t ask enough questions to realize she has a family. “Jason, can you give Liv a ride home?” Annette was already stepping towards the door. How could you, Annette.
Olivia supposed Jason had nodded some kind of consent because Annette and Curtis shouted a goodbye and walked out. “I hope you don’t mind sitting through the dinner rush, I’ll take you home when things slow down. Order some dinner, on the house.” Jason said rather coldly. He slid her menu right in front of her, as if she could read it, never mind concentrate on anything except how close he was. Olivia picked it up to use as a barrier between them. She peered over the menu, wa
tching his blurry form refilling glasses, and chatting up the patrons. He was still so effortlessly charming - you could tell every bar guest was silently begging for his attention, trying to rope him into their conversations. He was so much like his father. She thought back to Annette and Curtis, how in love they sounded. The only person who had ever treated her like that was Jason, and she had stepped on his love like it was nothing. Would anyone like that ever come along again? Her cheeks burned with shame. She supposed this is what she deserved, to be trapped, sightless and dependent, forced to choke on the very emotional disaster she had engendered.
Jason was back in front of her. “Decided what you want?” He asked coolly.
“Chicken burger and a salad? Could you-”
“No cheese, hot sauce and add a couple onion rings to the sandwich?”
“Well, I was just going to ask for salad dressing on the side, but yes - that sounds great.” Olivia felt a warmth in her stomach.
“I still know you, Liv,” Jason said in a somewhat softer tone. He grabbed her menu and bonked it on her head. “Twenty minutes.”
The warm feeling continued to bubble as Olivia sat watching him. A small figure had been leaning up against the bar mats directly across the bar from her, Olivia wondered who it was, and if she was watching her. Jason would periodically walk over to talk to the blurry shape, so Olivia assumed it was a server. She held her phone close to her face, checking the time. Dinner couldn’t get over fast enough.
TIME SEEMED TO STAND still as Jason took orders and managed the small dinner rush downstairs. Try as he might, he couldn’t stop sneaking glimpses at Olivia, sitting stoically against the wall at the corner of the bar. He truly had not been prepared for the emotions flooding every fiber of his being. How could someone do this to him- hadn’t he gotten over Olivia years ago? He noticed some of the men staring and it sent a strange feeling burning in his chest. Of course they stared. This was Brighton - beautiful, well-dressed women didn’t just come sit alone at your local pub. He could tell a group of youngish construction workers seemed to be eyeing her, possibly working up the nerve to approach her. Jason did everything he could to keep them distracted with jokes and conversations. Why though? He wondered to himself. Olivia is a New Yorker now; she can handle herself. Men must fall all over her there. The thought made his chest burn hotter and he checked his watch again. Dinner couldn’t get over fast enough.
Jason gave some hurried instructions to his brother when there were only three tables left, and the bar was picking up pace for the night. “Don’t worry about it, I was tending bar while you were still bussing tables down here, little bro.” Seth laughed and slapped him in the stomach. His face hardened and he gave a knowing look towards Olivia. “Don’t be too long...and be careful.”
Jason decided to ignore his brother’s ominous tone for now and went in back to grab his coat. “Call me if you need anything, Molly can show you anything on the computer if you need help ringing stuff in.” Jason knew his brother could handle it, that’s not what he was nervous about. He walked around the bar, and up to Olivia, who was pushing bits of lettuce around her plate with a fork. “Ready?”
JASON COULDN’T BELIEVE what he was doing. You could have called her a cab like you do for drunk guests every weekend, he chided himself. He turned up the heat in the truck, “warm enough?” He asked Olivia. Her cheeks were charmingly rosy from the brief exposure to the cold February night, and Jason suddenly had the urge to grab her chilly hands and press them between his own, like old times.
“I’m fine,” Olivia murmured towards the passenger side window. Jason watched her breath make a bigger and bigger circle of steam on the window. Her hair glistened in the faint light - the urge to reach out and touch was only getting stronger. Jason sniffed, and put his hand on the passenger seat headrest as he backed out of the parking space. A few of Olivia’s stray hair tickled his forearm and lightning shot through his nerves. Get it together, Jason.
“Do you still go to church?” Olivia asked as casually, seemingly indifferent to the torture her presence was putting him in.
“Still do, sometimes we drive all the way over to Severin.” Jason wondered what had sparked the question. Olivia wasn’t hugely involved in her church before she moved, he couldn’t imagine she was still attending services. But that wasn’t fair, was it? Jason didn’t know anything about her anymore. For all he knew she was more devout than him - after all, what had sparked this night on the town with her old best friend?
“I thought it’d be nice if me, my parents and Nan all go tomorrow,” Olivia said, more cautiously. Ah ah, Jason mused. She was feeling him out - Olivia had always tried to keep distance between him and her parents - maybe this wasn’t such a different Olivia after all. His feelings suddenly cooled.
“That’s really great, Liv. I’m sure they’ll all like having the family together.” Jason meant it, but he didn’t think she believed it. “It’s a nice gesture for your Nan, and it’ll be good for you to spend some time with your folks.” He regretted doubting her motives, and without thinking he put a hand on her shoulder, “What I would give to have the family together again...”
Olivia bristled under his hand, and Jason tried to reel it back in - he shouldn’t be bringing up sob memories, he was just being a friend. “Anyway, you guys should come, I might bring my niece.” Jason finally gave Olivia the information she had been fishing for, but he couldn’t tell if it was affecting her in any way. “Or I mean maybe we’ll go to Severin.”
“Don’t avoid church on my account, “Olivia responded passively. Still the impenetrable girl from Brighton, he thought dryly. Well, she was right - Olivia had already turned his life upside down once, there was no need to go rearranging it again on her behalf. Like leaving the bar on a Saturday night to play her chauffeur, he reminded himself ruefully.
Olivia’s parent’s house was a few miles outside town, past a sprawling, pristine golf course and country club. Jason wondered idly if Olivia had ever had a membership - she’d never asked him to play. He decided enumerating Olivia’s faults was a good exercise to help level out his feelings, but glancing at her sweet, solemn profile, it was hard to come up with anymore. She broke your heart, idiot, isn’t that enough? He thought. But he wasn’t sure it was.
Jason turned off his headlights and parked at the top of the long, gravel driveway. Olivia opened the door and stepped out, but Jason was at her side in an instant. He offered her his arm. Olivia frowned, “I’m fine, I know where the door is,” she assured him as she wobbled on her kitten heels.
“Don’t be stubborn, Olivia, I’m just making sure you’re getting home safe,” and Jason grabbed her under the arm as she lurched against his truck.
“Ok...I mean thanks,” She breathed. Jason wondered if her startled expression was from the slip or the nearly audible buzz of electricity that seemed to be flowing between his hand and her slender arm. Jason hauled her up onto the porch until they were standing side by side at the front door. Jason turned towards her.
Wasn’t he supposed to kiss her now? He tried to remember if he had ever walked Olivia to her door. Probably not, he decided - Olivia would think it was too old fashioned. But he couldn’t help it - looking at her, seemingly so vulnerable, so unlike the stone-cold girl he knew, Jason had an urge to gather her up in his arms and-
“Thanks, Jason, goodnight.” Olivia reached around him and pushed the door inward. Without another word she stepped inside and closed the door. Jason saw some lights turn on inside, and, feeling utterly foolish, walked back to his idling truck.
You absolute imbecile, what would she have done if you’d kissed her. Jason was torn. His stomach churned, and his mind whirled with the image of what hadn’t happened. Something in his soul craved the almost-kiss and driving away he ached with dissatisfaction. Olivia couldn’t leave soon enough.
OLIVIA LEANED HEAVILY against the door, waiting for the sound of crunching gravel to fade. She had woken her mother up, who came down to the kitchen.
Olivia knew her mother wouldn’t notice a flush in her face, or the way her head seemed to be somewhere else. Her heart was still racing- even without seeing him clearly, standing so close to Jason awoke something in her still.
As she reached around the door the animal part of her brain had screamed at Jason to wrap his arms around her. This was bad - a distraction. She hardened her resolve and walked into the kitchen. Jason wasn’t part of her life anymore, and there was no reason to bend her life around him. “Mom,” she said confidently, “Can you drive us to church tomorrow to meet Nan?”
Chapter 7
OLIVIA GLANCED DOWN at her crisp, charcoal pantsuit at the back of the chapel. She was very overdressed, she realized. Had it always been so casual at Sunday morning services? Olivia watched parishioners chat and smile, hug and point at empty seats, all dressed neat but casual, parkas slung over their arms. This used to be her community, her daycare, her friends, but now she didn’t recognize one face, and she felt absurdly out of place. It was suddenly hot, like she was under a hot spotlight, even though no one even spared her a glance. Her parents were straining over the heads of congregants, looking for Nan, who’d likely have been here for an hour already, having coffee and muffins with the elders and other long-time church members. Olivia, however, was squinting into the pews, hoping she wouldn’t see Jason.
Her morning had started off so well. She had been pleased to notice the gradual improvement in her vision hadn’t slowed down, and this morning she could make out the farthest end of the chapel, though the room looked like it was filled with a thick, opaque haze. Her mother and father had been congenial to each other, and even her as they bustled about getting ready for church. Everything had been so unexpectedly pleasant this morning, she was suddenly anxious for the inevitable come down. What would it be?
Wait For Me Book 1: A Second Chance Christian Romance Page 3
