Gregory had already entered and was hanging up his coat. Seconds after I had sat down, Marie began to cry and scream. He turned to me, clearly annoyed. Must have been a hard day at work, I thought silently.
“Can’t you ever get that child to be quiet, Juliana?” he snarled.
I got up and turned towards the room my daughter was in. “That child has a name, dear. And she was just fine until you came home,” I snapped back. I was tired and equally annoyed. I heard him move to my side and silently steeled myself for the blow.
As I wiped the blood from my mouth he said, “If you don’t get that girl to be quiet I’m going to kill her.”
“If you would stop hitting me, I could go calm Marie down,” I answered scornfully. He looked ready to hit me again and I cringed, regretting my words. “Please don’t, just let me go and quiet her down,” I pleaded.
Gregory nodded and I retreated back to my daughter’s side. I lifted her and rocked back and forth muttering soothing words. As I did so, I thought of Crystal, Damien, and surprisingly Adam. I hadn’t seen Adam once since last year, and only saw Crystal twice; once with Damien. It was Crystal who had first remarked that I was different now, that my personality had changed. It was rare that I showed sarcasm anymore, nor did I do much of anything without Gregory’s approval. It just wasn’t worth it anymore. I gave up my freedom, to try and protect myself and, more importantly, to protect Marie. I didn’t remember any other way of life now. I had tried to flee several times over the last few months, but someone always hunted me and Marie down. Most of the time I was beat even worse. So I gave up trying.
Finally, my daughter fell asleep in my arms. I put her in the crib and went back into the parlor, telling her wet nurse to stay with her. Gregory was drinking when I sat down. “She’ll be fine now. Honestly, Gregory, you shouldn’t act this way. She’s our daughter.”
“Be quiet, Juliana.” The entire side of his family and my own Father was disappointed that I had borne a girl instead of a son. Neither Crystal or Damien seemed to mind which was nice. As long as they had a niece or nephew, they were happy. My brother didn’t seem to care either way. I went back to my work and didn’t answer my husband. His words didn’t need a verbal answer.
These events were daily happenings for almost two weeks. One night I was awakened in the middle of the night by Marie screaming and Gregory swearing. I opened my eyes and looked towards my daughter’s room. I ran over, terrified. Gregory was standing next to her crib, shaking Marie, and yelling at her to be quiet. Marie’s wet nurse was pleading for him to stop and go back to bed. She looked past him at me. “Do not do that!” I pulled Marie from his arms and cradled her protectively against me. “You are going to hurt her!” I yelled. “Go to bed. I’ll stay up with her.”
The only times I would dare to yell at him was for my own baby’s sake. Gregory snarled, “You spend too much time with that child,” and stomped off. I heard him get back into bed and I silently left the room. I carried Marie out to the parlor and stopped. Without thinking, I grabbed a handful of baby blankets and my cloak. I wrapped Marie in the blankets and nestled her against my shoulder, raised the hood of the cloak against the cold, and silently left the house. I was suddenly determined to make one last attempt with my daughter to escape. I was desperate. I walked down the street and then paused uncertainly. I heard Marie whimper in pain and the sound forced me to move. I started walking away from town, as fast as I could.
After a while two lone figures appeared on the street. I continued walking towards them warily. I wondered who it was. Nighttime isn’t the safest time to be out away from town and as I got closer I saw it was Crystal with a young man with dark brown hair. “What are you doing out here?”
“What are you doing, Juliana?”
“Leaving,” I stated.
“And I’m here to stop you.”
I looked at her in angry disbelief. “You were the one who told me to leave.”
“A long time ago I did. But things aren’t that simple anymore. Damien and I tried getting you and Marie out a month ago. Gregory and everyone else tracked you down and we were all punished. You have Marie now – and no food, money, or clothing. You have nowhere to go without that. They’ll track you down, Julia. Go home before he hurts you both.”
Angrily, I turned back. “And why were you out?! And who is that with you?” I asked again harshly.
“To stop you. Damien was in the area and saw you leave the house. He sent me here to stop you. You were right, Julia. You can’t leave. There is nothing we can do to without getting severely punished as well. This is one of Damien’s friends.”
I walked home unwillingly because Crystal and her companion watched me the entire time. I quietly entered the house and hung up my cloak. I turned around and saw Gregory sitting behind me. I stared at him coldly. There was a single candle lighted.
“Put the child to bed, Julia,” Gregory said in a deceptively calm voice.
I knew not to argue. I didn’t want Marie around if he was going to get violent. I fled to her room where I put her in her crib. I returned to the parlor. Gregory rose to his feet. “You shouldn’t have done this, Juliana.”
“What, did you think I was just going to stand around and watch you hurt our child?” I asked angrily.
“The girl means nothing to me. She’s just an inconvenience.”
“I can see that,” I muttered in a bitter voice.
Gregory glared at me and grabbed my arm in a bruising grip. “The point was for you to bear a son, Juliana,” he whispered.
“Are we back to this again?” I swear to God that I have heard this speech a thousand times already. Gregory punched me. I felt the pain as the punch made contact with my right eye, but strangely I didn’t cry out, nor did I flee. The pain was just something I’ve learned to live with now. I smiled even. “You know Gregory. With all the beatings you’ve put me through you should be happy I was able to bear a child at all. Lord knows how many children I may have lost through these beatings without even knowing I was pregnant. There could have been several. And if you continue, you may never get another child,” I said mildly.
I felt his hand make contact with the area around my other eye. “If you don’t be quiet and if you don’t stop running off, I’ll kill her.”
“You wouldn’t dare,” I hissed squeezing my eyes shut.
Gregory didn’t answer my statement. “Go to bed, Juliana. It is late,” he replied coldly.
I fled to our bedroom. My eyes were already swelling shut. I requested the wet nurse to come to my room. When she arrived, I made her promise to protect my daughter, then fell asleep.
The following week was terrifying for me in a whole new way. I was blinded by my swollen eyelids so I couldn’t see anything but light patterns against my eyes. Even though I couldn’t see, I tried to get out of bed to help care for my daughter the very next day. I felt the cool air as the blankets slid off me and shivered. I tried to place my feet on the floor and stumbled over my nightgown, hitting the cold floor with a thud. I heard footsteps and blindly turned towards the sound, wondering who it was.
“Lady Juliana, you shouldn’t be out of bed! You are going to hurt yourself!”
I recognized the voice of my closest personal maid. “I need to help care for Marie. Please help me to the nursery, Anne,” I said, holding a hand out.
“I cannot allow that, Lady Juliana. You cannot even see the baby. You might drop her,” Anne replied.
I bit my lip and tears welled up in my already swollen eyes. I knew Anne was right, and reluctantly allowed her to help guide me back into the bed. She draped the blankets over me, infusing warmth into my legs.
Anne spoke again. “Natalie brought up some soup for you. Please try to eat it.” She guided my hand to the spoon and forced my fingers around it. I attempted to bring the spoon to my mouth, but most of the soup spilled down the corner of my mouth. Anne heaved a sigh that sounded exasperated.
I turned my head away in humiliation. I co
uldn’t even feed myself. Worse yet, I had spilled the hot liquid down my nightgown. The top of my chest felt uncomfortably hot. “Please, help me change,” I said. Anne pulled the covers back off and I spent the next hour or two struggling to get my head and hands through the correct holes. The rest of my soup was cold by the time Anne finished dressing and feeding me.
Since I couldn’t see I had to trust my husband, maids, and the wet nurse to care for Marie. The only one I trusted was the wet nurse and Marie’s wails only added to my fear. I cried constantly through closed eyelids and no one could calm me unless they bought my daughter to visit.
The first day that I could see normally was the day of my eighteenth birthday. I slowly walked into the kitchen and found Gregory watching Marie’s wet nurse trying to quiet down Marie. “No, let me,” I muttered looking at my daughter. There was a bruise on her face. I sighed and rocked my daughter to soothe her. It seemed no matter what I did, what I tried, there would be no way for me to be free from Gregory. A single tear slid down my face. I couldn’t help it. If he or any of the servants noticed they didn’t say anything.
It was my daughter who looked concerned as I began to eat with her on my lap. Marie reached forward and grabbed my finger. “Mama,” she said. She looked up at me with wide blue eyes.
I looked at her, astounded. Her first word. “Aye, Marie,” I said, looking at Gregory. I couldn’t keep the sneer off my face. “She recognized me before you, darling,” I said sweetly, picked up Marie, and left the room. As I left, Marie was patting my arm and cooing “Mama,” repeatedly. I smiled again over my shoulder and went to the bedroom. However, once I was out of the room I winced inwardly at my words. I try so hard not to make Gregory mad now but sometimes I just can’t help myself.
The next three days passed with what I began to believe was an ominous peace through the house. It was on this third day that we ran out of several vital supplies. I paced the hallway wondering if I should wake Marie and bring her with me to the market. Finally, I decided not to disturb her and left her in the care of her wet nurse.
I walked to the market with a servant to purchase the things I needed. I took a deep breath as we entered the market. At times the aroma of the area could be pungent but today it smelled almost refreshing after all that time inside. It was a mix of manure, fruit, and faintly of flowers.
The last stand I went to was the apple stand. It was run by Adam’s family and I was relieved to see one of Adam’s brothers was working and not Adam himself. He had dark brown hair and eyes like his brother. Those eyes widened when they saw me. I know there still had to be bruising around both of my eyes. “It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you, Lady Smith,” he said quietly. I nodded and he continued, “Adam will be sorry he missed you. He’s with Miss Ruth today.”
I silently gagged to myself at the thought of them together. It left a sour taste in my mouth, even though I probably should be happy for him. “Thank you for the apples,” I replied. It was getting dark and we needed to be hurrying home before the sun completely set. I handed the last basket to my servant and we started home.
I walked up the steps and opened the door. My servant had already left my side for one of the side doors. I heard Marie scream. I dropped the baskets just inside the doorway, forgotten. I wondered where my daughter’s wet nurse was.
“Marie!” I screamed, running into the parlor. I saw her sitting on the floor with my husband towering over her. “Gregory, stop it!” He picked her up and then slapped Marie. I lunged for both him and Marie – whomever I could grab first. “Let her go! You’re hurting her!”
Gregory turned and knocked me aside. I fell into a crumpled heap on the floor. I coughed and looked up just to see a flash of metal before a coughing spasm made me double back over. I heard Marie shriek.
The next thing I knew I was being yanked to my feet by Gregory. “Damn you!” he yelled. “What did I tell you before?” I knew my face was still all bruised and now I could feel blood ooze out of my mouth as well.
I was about to answer his bewildering question when I caught sight of something no mother should ever have to see. Marie was lying in a pool of blood with a large carving knife sticking out of her back. “Marie!” I screamed and ran to her side, pulling out of Gregory’s grip. I suddenly felt I couldn’t get enough air, as if I had been hit in the stomach hard.
I pulled out the knife and swung towards him. I slashed at him desperately, trying to keep him away from my daughter. I caught the side of his forearm before Gregory wrestled the knife out of my hands, cutting me and breaking a couple of fingers in the process. He threw it out of the room. I lunged at my husband again, hitting and clawing him. I tore at his shirt, oblivious to the pain in my arm. I was going to keep him away from my daughter at all costs.
Gregory punched me, then threw me to the ground. I landed next to my daughter and crawled to her. Marie’s cream–colored dress looked red from all the blood. She was so still. I couldn’t hear any noise from her. Quickly I turned her over and saw her blue eyes staring at me blankly. I wailed in horror and utter despair as I cradled Marie against me, staining my dress. I knew she was dead. After a second I laid her down and slowly got to my feet. I stared at Gregory with such hatred, hate that I didn’t even know I could possess. “You killed her,” I whispered.
“I told you I would,” Gregory replied with a shrug.
I stared in shock and grief. “You killed our daughter. That was our child, Gregory! “
“Be quiet, Julia!” he hissed and slapped me. He then held my wrist in a bruising grip. “If you say anything no one is going to believe you and you’ll end up just like Marie. Do you understand me?”
“You won’t get away with this,” I gasped. “I will tell –” Gregory hit me again. I cried out and he threw me to the floor. “Please, don’t hurt me anymore,” I whimpered.
“Do not say anything and I will not hurt you. Get up.”
I obediently got up. Gregory grabbed my wrists again and dragged me to a room near the back of the house. I knew he was going to kill me – he knew I wasn’t going to keep quiet about this. It was a tiny storage room we didn’t use much. The floor was only dirt and the walls were of cold stone. There was a high window in the room but I didn’t try to climb out. There was no point, I was too exhausted and hurt and had nowhere to seek safety from. I huddled against the wall sobbing as the light faded until I could barely see anything. It was past sunset.
I suddenly looked up a long while later. I thought I heard a noise from the direction of the window. I staggered to my feet and continued to stare at the window. The room was cold and I began to shiver. I saw someone was lurking around outside. “Who – who are you?” I stammered in a hoarse voice.
“Don’t be afraid, Julia. I’m not going to hurt you,” a man’s voice said. The voice was unfamiliar.
“How did you know my name?” I asked in bewilderment. The person who had spoken climbed onto the windowsill with easy fluid movements. It was amazing how quickly he had gotten up there; I didn’t think there was anything to stand on out there. He had blond hair and blue eyes that looked only slightly darker than my own.
“I’ve been watching you. Do you want out of here? I’ll get you out.”
I remembered the times I had felt eyes watching me from the shadows. Could it have been this man? I sighed. “Do not be a fool. No one can help me. Who are you?”
“My name’s Samuel,” he answered and smiled grimly. I saw a flash of ... fangs? “I can help you.”
“You aren’t human. What are you?” I asked staring at him intently. Those teeth certainly weren’t human.
Samuel looked slightly surprised at my outburst. “Very observant. I am a vampire, Julia. I’ll explain more later. We must go now before Gregory comes back.”
At the moment, I wouldn’t have cared if he was Satan himself. All I knew was that he was offering to get me out of this hellish place. There was finally a way out. “Aye,” I mumbled staggering closer. “Please get me ou
t of here, Samuel. Please,” I whispered in a trembling voice. As I moved to the window I put a hand on my bloody bruised face.
Samuel saw me touching my face. “Do not fret about that. Everything will get better. I promise.”
“All right,” I muttered, dropping my hand to my side. Samuel leapt down and helped me climb out. I felt my feet touch the ground and nearly collapsed. I hadn’t realized until now how badly I was hurt. I felt strong arms steady me. I hadn’t seen Samuel follow me out but here he was, helping me.
“Easy Julia. God, you’re cold,” he murmured. He took off his coat and draped it over my shoulders. He took my uninjured hand and we started down the street.
After a short while, I stumbled and pitched forward with a small cry. My left ankle was throbbing and I was too exhausted to try and catch my balance. Samuel caught me before I could hit the ground. “He did you in good this time,” he muttered. He gently picked me up and continued walking. I hesitantly laid my head against his shoulder.
We arrived at a house on the outskirts of town a little later. Samuel carried me inside and I saw there were six other vampires in the house as well. Samuel laid me on the only bed in the room. “Mary Anne, get her cleaned up. I’ll bring in some more firewood. Matthew, you three leave her alone right now,” he said, looking at the other male vampires sharply. They nodded and he left the room.
Mary Anne moved to my side with a bowl of warm water and a washcloth. “You poor girl. No one should have to go through what you did.” She began to gently clean off my face.
“He killed my girl. He killed my baby girl,” I moaned, starting to cry again.
The dark haired vampire turned to someone behind her. “Oh Jesu. Christy . . . .” she said, her voice trailing off in horror. One of the other female vampires came forward and sat beside me. She handed me a mug of warm tea.
“Drink this,” she urged softly. I sipped at the warm fluid. “I’m sorry honey. Look … don’t worry about him. He cannot hurt you anymore.”
Lost Soul Page 7
