Lost Soul
Page 22
“Oh, that figures. I found some clothes in our room. Matthew and I thought they could be useful. We’re all going hunting. We’ll be back soon.”
“Be careful, Christy. Do not do anything stupid.”
“We’ll be careful. Take care of the other two,” Christy answered and gently shut the door behind her.
“They’re going hunting,” I informed Mary Anne. “Christy brought these over. They look a little big though.” I held up the men’s shirt, but Mary Anne barely looked over.
“As long as they’re careful, they’ll be all right,” she answered distractedly, sitting beside Valerie. I nodded and resumed my seat beside Samuel. She looked towards us. “I would have moved Samuel to the bed as well, but with all of the burns I decided it would cause him too much pain,” she said quietly.
“I was thinking the same thing,” I confessed. “Then I decided not to as well.”
Mary Anne nodded as she checked on Valerie again. She shook her head and her eyes reflected sadness. “That place had been our home for almost a decade, Julia. Now it’s gone. Sharon’s gone …Valerie’s barely hanging on … I’ve known Valerie for just about as long as I’ve known Samuel and Matthew. Over four centuries …. ”
“Mary Anne, it’ll be all right,” I said, reaching across to touch her hand. I had never heard her so upset. “They’ll be fine. We’ll stay here until they get stronger … and then we’ll find another place.”
Mary Anne flashed a quivering smile. “Aye. You’re right, Julia.”
I smiled and withdrew my hand. I slowly un–bandaged my injured hand and looked at it. It had healed somewhat, but it still had angry cuts all over the skin. I turned it over and shook my head. “I shouldn’t have done this.”
Mary Anne looked at me. “Samuel’s silly little fledgling,” she said with affection. She looked around. “I wonder if they still have some needles and sewing materials around here somewhere,” she muttered and got up. She paced the room, looking in drawers. “Some of us need fresh clothing.”
“Samuel and Valerie certainly will,” I said with an amused smile.
“Jeffrey and Christy need fresh clothing too. Aha, there we are. Two needles, some cloth, and a little thread. I think we can make alterations to the clothes Christy and Matthew found so they’ll fit Samuel and Valerie. ”
She took the materials out of a couple of drawers. “Here you go, Julia,” she said, handing me some of the materials. “Concentrate on making Valerie’s and Samuel’s clothes first. They obviously cannot wear what they’re wearing now.”
I nodded and started sewing. Sewing was the one thing that the vampires did not have to teach me. Sometimes it seemed like it was the only thing that didn’t need to be taught.
Mary Anne turned and re–cleaned Valerie’s wounds again. She took off the bloody clothing for a closer look and to get to the wound better. She took some of the thread and silently stitched up her wound some. She changed the bandages again and finally covered her with a light blanket. She sat down and also began working. The next hour passed in silence.
I was in the process of reattaching a sleeve to a dress when there was a moan from my right. I glanced up, startled, to see Samuel stirring. I laid aside my needlework and turned towards him. “Samuel?”
Samuel turned his head towards me. Slowly, his eyes fluttered open and met mine. “Julia?”
A smile broke over my face. “Aye. How fare thee?” I asked, my hand hovering in midair. I didn’t want to touch his skin in fear of hurting him.
“Sore,” Samuel muttered in a hoarse voice. Solving my dilemma, he painfully reached out and took ahold of my hand.
My eyes blurred with tears. “I’m sorry Samuel. I did not know until I got outside that you were still in–”
Samuel squeezed my hand, interrupting me. “Don’t Julia. I’m glad you’re safe,” he whispered. A pained smile touched his face.
Mary Anne glanced up. “I’m glad to see you are awake, Samuel. You’ve been out for about a day. Do you want some water?”
Samuel nodded slightly. “Water would be great, Mary Anne. Just a little of something to help moisten my mouth.”
Mary Anne nodded. “I’ll be right back,” she said and left the room.
Samuel looked back at me. “Is everyone else all right?”
I hesitated, and then said, “Sharon and some of Beth’s group didn’t make it out. When Richard returned with Adam, he left without helping the second he saw the house was under attack. And Valerie is still on the bed beside you – she’s still unconscious but alive. Everyone else is all right.”
Samuel sighed. “Damn him,” he said but his voice was toneless. Grimacing, he slowly got to his feet. I raised my head to look at him and saw no hope in his eyes. He glanced towards Valerie and then stared vacantly at the wall.
My breath caught. “Samuel ….” I whispered, rising to my feet.
The door opened and closed again. Mary Anne paused a second and then walked to us. She held out a glass of water. “Here Samuel.”
After a second, he glanced towards her. Automatically, he reached for the glass and took it. “Thank you,” he said emotionlessly.
Mary Anne looked sharply at me. I looked back and gave a helpless shrug, but she seemed to understand better than I did. < Talk to him, Julia. He feels guilty over what happened, thinks it’s his fault.> She said telepathically. Out loud, she said, “I’m going to go explore the rest of this place.”
I nodded meaningfully at her. Samuel didn’t turn, nor did he say a word. Mary Anne left again. Samuel finished the water, and then resumed staring at the wall after putting down the glass. I suddenly felt his weariness, both mental and physical. And hunger. The sensation I felt was brief, but almost overpowering. I couldn’t figure out how the hunger wasn’t drowning everything else out. Was it because he was older, stronger? I was not sure. It wasn’t often that he lets me get a glimpse into his thoughts.
It was now I realized I cared for him just as much as Adam. It just wasn’t in the same way. I could sense the pain he was in because of the burns ... and I could also sense the agony he felt over what had occurred. And I desperately wanted to ease that pain – the way he had eased mine.
Without warning, he spoke. “I was a fool.”
I stared as he continued. “I should have realized it was a trap. I had been so worried about you that I let my guard down.” His voice filled with harsh bitterness. “And Richard ––”
“Samuel,” I said quietly, interrupting him. He didn’t seem to hear me. He was too engulfed in his own world of anger, guilt, bitterness, and betrayal. I moved up behind him and very carefully put my arms around his waist. His body was tense.
“Samuel, stop it. It won’t do any good. None of us expected it. They would have just broken the door down anyway. We all did the best we could. Richard is just a coward. You saved Valerie’s life.”
“She’s not out of danger yet,” he answered tightly.
“If you hadn’t pulled out the stake and gotten her out of the house she would not have a chance at all. Blaming yourself won’t change anything.”
My arms around him tightened reflexively. Finally, I felt him relax slightly. For the first time he seemed to realize I was still in the room. He moved just enough for his hands to cover mine. “Julia ….” he whispered, as his fingers gently stroked mine.
I spoke softly. “You’re starving, Samuel. You should take blood. It’ll help you heal faster.”
I felt him begin to pull away from me. “I’m not strong enough to go out and hunt,” he said harshly. I refused to let him go.
“Then feed from me!”
Samuel shook his head and tugged away. I could feel the distance widening between us and it wasn’t just physical distance. He was withdrawing from me, putting up mind shields, blocking me out telepathically. I turned so I could face him. “Samuel, I’m worried about you!” I cried out in frustration.
“Don’t be,” he said quietly. “I do not have to feed now. I do
not want to feed from you.” His eyes focused again on the wall.
“Do not be foolish, Samuel. I want you to feed from me. You’re half–starved as it is.” I stepped closer to him. “Samuel, please,” I pleaded. Slowly, deliberately, I brushed my hair aside, exposing my bare neck. I raised my eyes to look at him.
He was now staring at me, transfixed. I saw hunger in every tense muscle in his body. I took another step closer. “Julia, no. Don’t you understand?” he asked in a strangled voice. “I’m so thirsty that if I start feeding from you, I will have no way of controlling it!”
“I just fed two nights ago. I’m still mostly at full strength. You say you’re too weak to go out and hunt. I agree. But if you don’t feed now your thirst will be beyond any control. I am strong and the only one in here right now able to feed you.
“You and Christy have both told me what happens when the blood thirst gets out of control. A vampire becomes so desperate they’ll go after anything that can satisfy the hunger, the need, especially if there’s prey around that is weaker. I know you do not want to hurt Valerie. So please, Samuel, take my blood. I trust you.”
Samuel’s breath was coming in short gasps of air. His eyes were fixed on my throat as I saw the blue disappear as they dilated. His lips parted on an agonized moan as he struggled against the thirst and lost.
“I trust you,” I repeated softly. Samuel reached out and pulled me the last few inches or so to him. I felt his overpowering hunger as he bit into my throat. I forced myself not to recoil at the sharp pain that raced through me. There was nothing gentle about the movement this time. It was like the ferocious desperation of a starving wolf.
At first, his drinking was savage. I began to wonder if I had made a mistake trusting him, wondered if his thirst was already out of control. I also began to fear that he would accidentally tear out my throat; his teeth were ravaging the flesh so much. It was certainly not small neat puncture marks.
A dreamy sensation rose to compete with the pain I felt, and then, unexpectedly, I felt our minds connect through the ka-tet. Through the bond we were sharing, I could suddenly feel his emotions. There was fierce joy as the thirst was slowly sated and gratitude at my desire and stubbornness to feed him.
My own pleasure answered his as I felt his sucking grow gentler. I took pleasure in knowing I was giving him the strength to live, being able to return the favor. The dreamy detached feeling only became stronger now and the unbearable pain I had been in seemed to recede.
I didn’t feel alarm again until my legs abruptly buckled and gave out. I knew the only thing that was supporting me now was Samuel’s arms around me. Too much, I thought hazily. He’s taking too much ….
My mind was now reeling with confusion. Suddenly, I felt Samuel jerk upright. I heard him say something, but was none too clear on what he said. I tried to say his name but couldn’t. Darkness engulfed me instead.
***
Chapter 16
Something cool and wet touched my neck. It was probably supposed to feel good but the touch just bought searing pain. It was that pain that made me gasp and open my eyes.
Samuel’s face came into focus. His eyes were filled with worry and concern. “Julia?” After he saw my eyes were open, he continued, “Bloody hell, Julia, why did you insist on doing it?! I could have killed you!”
“You didn’t. You needed the blood, Samuel. You controlled it,” I rasped out. I still felt incredibly sleepy.
Samuel’s face contorted in unusual anger. “If I did this to your throat while in “control” I’ll hate to see what would happen if I lose ‘control,’” he answered. He gently dabbed at my neck again with one of the cloths.
Piercing pain again flooded my senses. This time I realized it came from my throat and neck area. I winced and jerked back. I was laying on the bedroll on the floor. “Do not press so hard, Samuel,” I said in a strangely hoarse voice.
“I’m not. I barely applied any pressure.”
“But the cloth hurts!” I protested. “Being fed off of never hurt this much before.”
Samuel gave me a strange look. “You really don’t know . . . or understand.” He gently pressed a small mirror into my hand. I had no idea where he had gotten it from.
“Take a look at your throat, Julia.”
Without waiting for a reply, he rose to his feet and stepped away. Off–handily I noted that nearly all the burns had healed. His chest, arms, and face were almost perfectly flawless again.
I slowly sat up, noticing how light–headed I was. I raised the mirror and stared at the sight of my neck. There were two healing tears. It almost looked as if I had been mauled by an animal. “Oh … Samuel, how long was I unconscious?” I asked, understanding, remembering.
“For a while. The others just got back from their hunt. Beth’s group is staying in the barn. Mary Anne said the ka-tet is sitting in the deserted sitting room,” Samuel answered. He looked back at me worriedly. “How are you feeling?”
“Kind of light–headed. But better,” I assured him. I said nothing about the slight pain that was growing in my stomach. I knew I was weakened, that I needed to feed. I didn’t want to tell Samuel that. I didn’t want him to worry, he felt guilty enough.
I climbed to my hands and knees. Samuel reached down and helped me to my feet. He held me against him gently, waiting for me to regain my balance.
He suddenly spoke. “Julia, I’m sorry I lost control like that. But thank you for wanting to help me. Just be more careful next time. I could have drained you without even realizing it.”
His last sentence unsettled me but I tried not to let it show. “No problem. I wanted to help you; I could sense how weak you were. And yes, I’ll try to be more careful,” I answered. I leaned back against him and realized his chest was still bare. Self–conscious, I moved a couple of steps from him and looked at Valerie.
Samuel followed my gaze. He sighed and walked to the bed. Sitting down on the bed beside her, he quietly said, “Both you and Valerie are strong. You’re probably stronger than me.”
I thought of all the things that he could do that I couldn’t and snorted. “Oh, right. You’re much stronger than me, Samuel.”
Samuel shook his head. “Physical strength is not what I’m talking about, Julia. The fire in you burns brighter.”
I was about to protest when he reached out to stroke Valerie’s hair. “Hello, Valerie,” he said. “Matthew will be in here soon to feed you.”
I snapped my mouth shut. I couldn’t even feel angry at his attentions towards Valerie. I decided it would be best to leave them alone for a while. I turned and made my way out of the room. Hearing voices down the right side of the hallway I slowly walked towards the sound.
Matthew got up when I got to the door. He glanced at me and then continued down the hallway towards the room Samuel and Valerie were in. I entered the room and looked around. Everyone was sitting on chairs that surrounded the fireplace. No one had lighted any lights.
Adam looked up and rose to his feet. He walked to me and stared at my neck. “What happened?” he asked quietly.
“Someone got carried away with feeding. I’ll be all right,” I answered, lowering my head so my hair covered some of the wound.
“Samuel?”
I looked up sharply. “It’s not his fault Adam!”
Adam’s answer was one I hadn’t been expecting. “I know, Julia. He was starving. He couldn’t control it. Is he all right now?” I nodded, speechless. He seemed so calm about it, despite the fact that Samuel had kissed me just the night before. “Then come on. You better feed off of me before you get that weak. You fed two nights ago. There are not many humans around here.”
He gently took my arm and led me to another room. A protest died on my lips as I realized he was righ
t. Samuel had taken a lot, too much actually.
Adam shut the door behind me. He then folded back the collar of his shirt. The furnishings of the room went unnoticed as I struggled to keep from pouncing on him immediately.
“Are you sure?” I asked uncertainly even as my eyes focused on his throat. I knew he was still uncomfortable with being a vampire and I did not want to force him into doing something he didn’t want to do, whether it would be good for me or not.
“Just do it, Julia!” he blurted out. I moved to his side and gently bit into his throat. I cupped the back of his neck with my hand. I began to drink deeply. Our minds quickly connected through the telepathy as Samuel and I had done earlier.
My hunger was lessening as I fed, the pain earlier had faded. I was so relieved about how well Adam had taken the news that Samuel had fed from me; his understanding. I was also grateful that he had sensed my need and had not been afraid. As far as I knew, we could not hypnotize fellow vampires.
A moment or two later I jerked upright, then took a step back, stopping myself from taking too much. I glanced up into his heavy–lidded eyes.
“Are you all right?” I asked, worriedly.
Adam caught my hand. “I’m fine.”
He lifted his other hand to tilt my head back. “And you’re looking better,” he continued, gazing at the healing wounds on my throat.
“I feel better. Steadier,” I answered truthfully. I felt less dizzy, stronger now. I smiled up at him.
Adam wrapped his arms around me. His brown eyes were filled with both tenderness and concern. “Good to hear. What would you like to do tonight?”
“Well … I want to check on Samuel and Valerie one more time. Then I don’t know ... we shall think of something.”
Adam released me and nodded. “All right.”
We turned went back into Valerie and Samuel’s room. Everyone else was already in there. Samuel looked up as we entered. His eyes lingered on me for a long minute. He was still sitting on the bed beside Valerie. “I’m sorry, Julia,” he apologized again. “Are you all right?”