Protecting Tova (Iron Mountain Book 1)

by Havana Wilder

  “I’m okay with that.” I dare him a sultry look.

  “God, I want you. In due time, I promise,” he says, his voice rough with restraint. With that, he collapses on top of me.

  I let out a frustrating sigh. “Okay, you big brute, you’re crushing me.”

  He quickly moves to a sitting position and runs his fingers through his tousled hair, then reaches to gather his belongings. “I guess I’d better get going.”

  “Yeah, wouldn't want to be late on a count of me. Kage will never let you live it down.”

  Cupping my face, his eyes widen, and a smile takes over his features as he corrects, “I don’t give a shit what Kage thinks. I’ll stay here all day if I want, and there’s not a damn thing he can do about it.”

  I smack his rear. “Oh Pierce. I was just teasing. But in all seriousness, I don’t want you to be late.”

  Once he’s fully dressed, I escort him, hand in hand, down the driveway to the gate. He brushes his lips against mine softly, then struts down the dirt road heading toward the track. After he’s out of sight, I head to the house to shower and clean up.

  As it gets closer to the lunch hour, I decide to head down to the common area to eat with everyone. It will be good for me to make an appearance with the rest of the trainees and see my friends for a bit.

  Arriving at the cafeteria, I open the doors and scan the large room. I catch Adi, and the girls sitting at the table all the Protectors dine at, though the guys haven’t made it to the table yet. Adi reaches up and waves at me when she sees me, and I nod before continuing to scan the crowd for Pierce.

  I finally catch sight of him and am about to take a step towards him when...

  What the hell?

  His back is facing me as he side-hugs a girl with long brown hair and then proceeds to kiss her on the top of her head. My facial expression must have given away my fury because Adi follows where I’m staring and beholds the entire nightmare. I turn immediately and storm out of the cafeteria, taking off at a dead run toward my mom’s house. I hear Adi yell my name, but I don’t stop, don’t look back, just keep running.

  When I finally reach my mom’s house, I stomp up the porch steps, my fury still burning red even after my long run. My mom must hear me coming because she flings open the door and takes in my scowl. “Sweetie, what happened? Why are you back so soon?”

  “Mama, I… I… I saw him kiss another girl in the cafeteria. He didn’t even try to hide it,” I stutter, my anger quickly melting into sobs.

  “I’m so sorry you witnessed that. You saw Pierce kiss another girl? Maybe it’s not what it seems. You need to talk to him about it,” she soothes, pulling me into a warm hug.

  “Yes, he kissed her on the head. And what is there to talk about?” I ask, weeping into her shoulder. “We’ve never said we were seeing each other exclusively. I told him he needed to pursue other girls because of all the garbage I carry. I just never thought he’d actually take me up on it. He’s supposed to come tonight, like he has for the past two nights, but mama, promise me you won’t tell him I’m here. I can’t see him right now.”

  “Anything for you, baby girl,” she coos, stroking my back.

  Just like clockwork, I watch Pierce enter the gate and head toward the barn once dinner is done. Noticing I’m not there, he comes up to the house and knocks.

  Mama opens the front door, leaving the screen door closed. Pierce asks, “Hi ma’am, is Tova around?”

  “No, son, she’s not here,” she answers politely.

  “I’m sorry. I’m Pierce. Do you know where she went?”

  Mama steps onto the porch, closing the screen door behind her. “I know who you are dear. But no, she didn’t tell me where she was going.”

  “Oh, ok. Do you know when she’ll be back?” He replies despondently, dropping his head and shoving his fingers in his hair.

  “She’s an adult now. Unfortunately, that means she can come and go as she pleases without letting me know her whereabouts.” Crossing her arms over her chest, mama finally gets the point across that he’s not getting any answers out of her.

  Dropping his head in defeat, he walks down the gravel drive and out of sight. My chest hurts as I watch him leave from mama’s kitchen window. Running to the couch, I pull a throw pillow to my chest and bury my head in it as I and bellow tears into it. Mama comes in, pulling me into her and rocking me as she strokes my hair while humming a soft tune attempting to calm me down. Once my tears dry up, she searches my face.

  “You need to talk to him about this. I don’t like seeing you hurting.”

  I wipe the wetness from my tear stained cheeks. “Mama, that’s just it. I have no reason to be hurting. He can do as he pleases.”

  “You’re right. Pierce can do as he pleases, but if you establish boundaries, he’ll know where you stand.”

  “I’m standing on my own two feet. I don’t need a guy.”

  “No, you don’t, but you’re not fooling me, sweetheart. I’ve seen a spark in your eyes that I haven’t seen since Lightning was born, and I don’t want that spark to fade. You’re the master at sweeping things under the rug, never letting certain issues see the light of day. Now, please promise me you’ll talk to Pierce.”

  “Okay, Mama, when the time is right, I’ll talk to him. Now can we eat ice cream and play cards?”

  “Of course, sweetie, what kind of ice cream, or do I even have to ask?”

  “You know what I like, chocolate all the way.” I muster a soft smile.

  16

  Pierce

  I approach Adi and Dani-Jo on the track the next morning.

  “Hey ladies, how are you doing?”

  “Fine, you?” Adi snaps with a glare.

  “Uh, well, I was hoping you could tell me why I can’t seem to find Tova. Is she avoiding me? Is she back at the cabin with y’all?” I ask.

  Adi scowls. “No, she’s not back at the cabin! Have you given her a reason to avoid you?”

  “Not that I know of,” I say with a shrug.

  “Well, I’ve known Tova for a long time, and if she is, in fact, avoiding you, you won’t hear from her until she’s ready. She’s as stubborn as a mule. Once her mind’s made up, it’s a done deal,” Dani-Jo interjects, eyeing me apologetically.

  Both the girls jog away from me, Adi looking like she could kill me, and Dani-Jo like she feels sorry for me.

  What on God’s green earth is going on?

  I have to figure this out. I’ll keep going back to her mom’s farm until she agrees to meet with me. She’s not staying at the cabin. I know she’s staying at the farm because the fire in my veins surges when I feel her around.

  God, I hate that she’s alone there, probably beinging inundated with nightmares.

  Tearing my fingers through my hair, my brother comes up behind me and pounds on my shoulders. “What’s the matter, Pierce. You look like your dog just died.”

  “We don’t have a dog, asshole. Though it may as well be like it died, my soul feels like it's being torn into a million pieces. I have no idea why Tova won’t talk to me. We were getting to know each other, establishing trust, developing a relationship...at least I thought we were. And just like that, now she’s avoiding me like the plague,” I gripe, shaking off his hold.

  “Seems like you need to do some soul searching.”

  I’m baffled as all get out, eyeballing him. “I’m as confused as a chameleon on a rainbow.”

  “I mean, look deeper. What do you think could be the cause? Is she afraid she’s falling for you and of being hurt? Were you two moving too fast, and she simply needs time to figure things out? Have you done, said, or not done something that would cause her to push you away? When a girl does something like this, it’s more than superficial issues causing it. The withdrawal goes deeper, and you have to figure out what’s really happening. What has mom always taught us?”

  We impersonate mom in unison, “Always stand for what’s right and don’t let love go without a fight.”

>   “I’ve seen the way you look at her, Pierce, and knowing she’s never given another guy the time of day, but has allowed you into her life, speaks volumes.”

  “It all means nothing if I can’t get her to talk to me,” I sulk, my shoulders slumping in defeat.

  “The brother I know never backs down without a fight. Show her you’re not going anywhere. Just keep showing up. Eventually, she’ll come around and let you know what’s up, even if it’s not something you want to hear.” When the hell did my brother get so smart?

  Nodding to him, I hit the pavement, pounding out my frustrations just like Tova was doing the first time I saw her.

  Two evenings in a row, it’s the same song, different tune from Tova’s mama. I know she’s in there. The fire in my bones ignite when I’m near her. I don’t call her bluff, though; I simply keep showing up, like Kage advised.

  It’s now Friday, and all the trainees and Protectors are at the track running when my bones begin to burn. I look up the hill and notice Tova strutting to the track, proceeding to talk with Kage. They don’t say much. He nods, and she exits the track.

  Oh shit, did she just tell him she didn’t want to be a Protector anymore?

  I ramp up my pace to get to him as quickly as I can. Barely able to breathe, bending over placing my hands on my knees, I gasp, “Wha… what did she say?”

  “Good God, Pierce, get a hold of yourself. She said that Mr. Huges has released her for light training, and asked if she could do laps around the pool instead of run. I said yes. What did you think she said? Have you two still not talked?” he asks incredulously.

  “No,” I huff, “she’s still avoiding me. I thought she was telling you she didn’t want to be a Protector anymore, so she wouldn’t have to be around me.” Finally able to stand upright, I breathe heavily and pant, “It’s Friday, not Monday, and Mr. Hughes has already said she could train again?”

  “I have his note right here. I guess she’s a fast healer. Why don’t you do a couple of cool-down laps and catch your breath.” He motions for me to walk it off.

  After dinner, all the Protectors and trainees head to the bonfire. Of course, we trainees have to wear our damn pj’s because we’ve lost all of our mock battles. Probably because my mind is stuck on Tova avoiding me. In my house shoes, flannel bottoms, and t-shirt, I sit on a log nearest the forest, away from everyone else. As I observe Adi making a s’more, she catches me watching and makes her way toward me. She lowers herself onto the log next to me.

  Marshmallow seeps out of her graham cracker and chocolate drips onto the ground, as she disappointingly shakes her head.

  “I was rooting for you and went to bat for you. I told her to open up, but then you go and do something so stupid. Now, she won’t even talk to me. Thanks, Pierce. Thanks a lot for making me lose my best friend.”

  I place my palms up in surrender. “What do you mean? What did I do?”

  Adi moves the s’more closer to her mouth. “If you don’t know, then I’m certainly not going to tell you.”

  “Do you know where she is so I can at least try to get her to talk to me?” I rest my forehead in my palms, shoving my fingers into my hair.

  “Yeah, but good luck with that,” she scoffs, wiping chocolate from the side of her mouth.

  I turn my head in her direction and plead, “Will you please tell me where she is?”

  Wrapping some dripping marshmallow around the graham cracker, Adi eyes me cautiously. “She’s swimming laps at the pool.”

  “In the dark?” I snap.

  Adi glares over at me. “She took a lantern. Don’t you dare tell Tova I told you. The only reason I know is because her mama told me when I went to check on her and she wasn’t there.”

  I jump to my feet, clasping my hands together and lengthen my arms in her direction. I quickly back away toward the gym. “Thank you, Adi. I’ll fix this if it’s the last thing I do.”

  Shaking her half-eaten s’more at me, she does her best to threaten, “You’d better, or else…”

  17

  Tova

  The hair raises on the back of my neck, and that oh too familiar burn floods my veins as I approach the shallow end of the lap pool. I glance up and see a spectator. I place my feet on the bottom of the pool and draw nearer to the stairs, letting the water drain from my face as I wipe my eyes. The figure doesn’t budge, merely watches me as I get closer. Reaching for my towel beside the lantern, I hear Pierce ask, “Are you tired yet?”

  “What the hell does that mean?” I bark, drying off and wringing out my hair as I step out of the shallows.

  His hands rise up in the air, and he shouts, “Oh, I dunno, tired of swimming. More importantly, tired of avoiding me, tired of living the lie that you’re just fine alone.”

  “Oh, don’t sit there and act like you know anything about what I’m tired of. Some people need to be high-fived in the face with a chair!” My blood’s on the verge of boiling, and I can feel my face redden.

  “Easy killer, I surrender,” Pierce acquiesces, holding his hands above his head.

  “I never threatened you, but don’t tempt me,” I growl, pacing back and forth.

  Standing up, he places his hands on his hips. “Damn it, what did I do? Why are you pushing me away and shutting me out?”

  I scowl, stopping in my tracks. “I shut everyone out. Don’t take it personally. It’s just easier, and why do you care anyway?”

  “Because I do. If I didn’t care about you, I wouldn’t come to check on you every single day. I wouldn’t have stayed every night that I could just to make sure you’re safe and could get some sleep.”

  Mirroring his stance, I place my hands on my hips and snarl, “Is that what you tell all the girls? I’m not letting you pull wool over my eyes, slick talker!”

  Pierce retorts, “What?”

  I pick my pace back up and fearlessly walk toward my bag of things. “Oh, don’t play stupid! I came to the cafeteria the other day for lunch. Adi and I both saw you hug and kiss some brunette.” Gathering my bag, I continue, “I get it, I do. I told you to find someone else. I just didn’t think it’d hurt this bad watching you do it. And to think, Adi told me to give you a shot. It was more like a shot to the heart. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be on my way.” I grip the lantern and go to side-step him to exit the gym.

  Pierce shoves his fingers roughly through his tousled hair. “Fuck me! I wished I’d known you saw that.”

  “Well, I did see it, whether or not you wanted me to. So good night and have a nice life.” I storm toward the door.

  Running to get in front of me, Pierce cuts me off, “Oh no, you’re not leaving that quickly.”

  I scowl and shove him. “Like hell I’m not.”

  He grabs my wrist. “I want to talk to you, Tova.”

  Twisting out of his grip, I bark, “And people in Hell want a drink of water, Pierce.”

  He’s not taking no for an answer, continuing to talk while maintaining his distance, inches away from me. “You remember my uncle Morton?”

  Stepping back, I fold my arms across my chest and glare. “What the hell does he have to do with anything?”

  “In this instance, he has everything to do with it. He has a daughter; her name is Emerys. She’s my first cousin. She’s about the same height as you and the same age. We only see each other around the holidays. This past Wednesday, she was in the cafeteria at the same time we were. When she spotted me, she snuck up behind me and hugged me. Realizing it was her, I got excited, kissed her on top of her head while hugging her back, telling her it was good to see her. I asked what vocation she chose. We’re affectionate, but not in a gross way like kissing cousins or anything like that. She’s in training to be a caregiver; she has the kindest spirit and means no harm.”

  “Humph,” is all I can muster.

  “See, if you’d only talked with me, you’d know I only have eyes for you, Tova.” Pierce reaches his hand out for mine.

  Retreating further from him, I s
hake my head. “From where I was standing and what I witnessed, it sure didn’t tell me you only have eyes for me. Again, Pierce, I’m sorry to have inconvenienced you in any way. You’re free to pursue anyone you want. I apologize for not explaining myself fully. You’re not tied down to me, nor do you need to be.”

  Once more, I try to get around him. I exclaim while gesturing to the pool, “I’ll let you have the pool all to yourself.” He catches me around the waist as I pass, but I demand, “Let me go, now.”

  He backs away but keeps his hand on my waist. “Tova, I swear, she’s my cousin. I don’t want to pursue anyone else. I want you! Since the first day I laid eyes on you, I’ve wanted only you. Maybe I wasn’t clear when I said I wanted to mend your heart. I never in a million years meant to break your heart or for you to question my intentions. I would betroth you right now if you’d have me. I’ll never stop caring for you, never stop pursuing you, and never stop loving you. Maybe you don’t believe in love at first sight, but after seeing you…I’m a believer.”

  Removing his hand from my waist, Pierce holds his hand out to me once more, searching my eyes. I glance down, knowing there are crocodile tears in them just waiting to spill over, but I refuse to blink. I can’t move. I can’t speak. My bottom lip is quivering, and I can feel my entire body start to tremble. And just like that, with his words and actions he walks into my heart like he’s always belonged there and destroys the walls I’ve built up and sustained for so long leaving a clear path to my heart lighting my soul on fire.

  He steps into me, embracing me. Noticing my tremoring, he rubs my damp skin, drying me quickly with his warmth, but I’m shaking for all kinds of reasons now. Yes, I’m a little chilly, but I’m more shocked and elated that he practically just said he loved me. I love him too, but there’s a massive lump in my throat, and I don’t have the courage to say it back; so, I just lean into him, hoping he knows I love him too.