Courage (Blackstone Book 4)

by J. L. Drake

  Be an asshole to me, but don’t you dare mention the ones I love!

  “Now I’m glad the judge listened to me.” I smirked through my lie. “I knew your son was guilty, just like I knew you were involved. All it took was my sad little eyes to convince him to convict your son.” His face went red, and for once in my life I was pleased I could pull off a lie with a straight face. Sometimes in the courtroom, a bit of acting helped the case—not that I would ever lie in court. “I wish I was there when those doors slammed shut between the two of you.”

  “Bitch!” He ripped at my shirt and tore at my pants. My inner tiger came out, and I grew stronger, and even though I was horribly outnumbered, I wasn’t going to go down without a fight. “I’m going to show you what I’ve been wanting to do since the day we met!”

  “Screw you!” I managed to wiggle a leg free and lashed out at him.

  “Watch out. She’s a kicker,” one of his men called as Henry felt between my legs.

  “Help!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. “Please, someone help me!”

  “You think anyone is going to help you? One look at the six of us, and they’ll run like the cowards they are.” He moved in close, and I felt his breath on my neck. I took that chance to bite down on his ear. He yelped and growled like a wild animal. I spat whatever was in my mouth in his face, only to get another punch to my stomach.

  “She’s scrappy.” One guy laughed, entertained by the whole thing while I once again fought to suck in sweet air.

  “Bitch.” Henry felt around his wound and glared at me. “I should have finished you the day we left the courtroom.”

  “But yet, here we are.” I coughed and blinked back the dark spots. Stay focused, Sloane. Fight to the very end.

  “Boss,” the bald-headed man looked over his shoulder, “I think we should move this along.”

  I felt my fight return, and sucked in the deepest breath I could muster, and…

  The loudest, scariest cry I’d ever heard a human make stopped mine mid-scream. It took me a moment to realize I wasn’t even the one who made it.

  Ellie was wild, red in the face, and her arms were locked at her sides. Tears streamed down her cheeks while she moved forward like an unstable maniac. She raced toward Henry, and he jolted back, unsure what she was capable of.

  The men jumped back too, and Henry looked around, realizing a lot of attention was being directed our way. Ellie sucked in a deep breath and started to scream again.

  I tore free and spun around, breathing wildly. It was as though time stood still, and everything shifted like a movie trying to catch up while buffering.

  Three men in business suits approached from the parking lot and called out, asking what was going on.

  “Shut her up!” Henry yelled, but when one of the men went for Ellie, she covered her ears and screamed her incredible scream again in his face.

  “Help!” I desperately called to the three men, and they started walking toward us. One of them pulled out his cell phone.

  “Shit!” Henry waved his hands at the guys. “Get in the fucking car!”

  One moment I was inches from being sexually assaulted, and the next I was nearly run over as the car squealed by, only missing me by a hair. I fell to the ground and crumpled into a ball. I may have fight in me, but dammit, I was human and not made for the mob lifestyle.

  “Miss!” One man came to my side, and I jumped at his touch. “Sorry.” His hands pulled quickly back like I had burned him. “Are you okay?”

  Awkwardly, I moved to stand with shaky knees. He offered to help, but I shook my head. I couldn’t stand the feel of any man’s touch right now. I was too raw and emotionally fragile. I moved as quickly as I could toward Ellie, who was still screaming. I grasped her tightly around the shoulders and hugged her to me.

  “Hey, there. It’s okay, Ellie. It’s okay. I’m going to take you to your mom now.” I pushed her hair back from her face. “You can stop yelling.” I tried to smile through my own tears and terror. I finally got her to look at me, and her screams faded away.

  “Should I call the cops?” The man who had tried to help me held out his phone like he was unsure of his next move.

  “No, my father is a cop.” Another lie. “I’ll call him. Thank you so much for helping, though. We’re okay now, honestly.”

  “We should wait with you until he comes.” He looked concerned, but his friends were all for leaving, and they called out to him to go with them.

  “No, I appreciate it, but you’ve done enough. Thank you.” I just wanted to get Ellie back to her mother. “Really, you’ve done enough,” I repeated and caught his look of relief as he turned and left with his friends.

  “What was that about? Why were they doing that?” Ellie searched my face for answers.

  “They were after me, not you. This had nothing to do with you.” Tears spilled out of my eyes and ran down my cheeks. The adrenaline started to leave my body, and I could feel the impact of Henry’s punches. “It’s okay now. You saved me, Ellie. You did just the right thing.”

  “John has smiles, and I have screams.” She nodded.

  “I’m very happy for your screams.” I laughed out loud, and she smiled back, uncertain. I knew I had to get us out of there now, before I let what happened seep in to freeze my limbs. Everything hurt inside, but mostly in my heart. I had almost gotten Ellie killed. John would never forgive me for this. This could end us.

  With jittery hands, I wrapped my shirt around me and snatched up my broken phone before I took Ellie’s hand and we headed toward a nearby coffee shop. My anger grew the closer we got to the safety of the street. When we turned the corner near the shop, and I saw people moving around like normal, it fired an unreasonable anger inside me. The realization that life was going on just a short distance from where I was in a parking lot about to get kidnapped, raped, and beaten to death made me realize how extremely fragile life really was.

  “Ellie,” I turned to her, “can I ask you for a favor?” I whispered as more pain registered. My tongue was dry, and my head throbbed. “Hey, Ellie, can you keep a secret just between you and me?”

  “Do I keep it from Mom, Dad, and John?”

  I am officially the worst human ever.

  “Yes. Is that too much to ask?”

  She thought for a moment, and with every second that passed, I felt guilty for my request. It wasn’t fair to ask her to do this, but I needed time to mentally prepare for this to be John’s last straw with me.

  “I can do that.”

  “Really?”

  “John and I have secrets, like I broke the lamp in the living room last month, not our dog.” She pulled on an old memory, and I tried to act normal instead of explaining what I was talking about.

  I felt a little of the weight on my shoulders lift. It wouldn’t last, but it was nice for now. I guiltily hoped she would forget what happened and our deal, or at least hoped her version of the story wouldn’t be too bad.

  “Thanks.”

  “Are you hurt?”

  “I’m okay.” Third lie of the day.

  I managed to clean myself up in the restroom and zip up my coat. Ellie was kind enough to give me a moment for myself and kept her back turned while I gathered myself. I hurried so my dirty-tattered shirt wouldn’t be picked up by Kelly, who looked about ten years lighter when she walked through the front door.

  “This may go down as one of the best days I’ve had in years.” She hugged me, and I tried not to cry at her mothering touch.

  “I’m so happy to hear that.” I smiled through the storm inside me.

  “Did you ladies have fun?”

  “Yes,” Ellie answered a little monotone.

  “Great!” Kelly was on too big of a high to notice our fake smiles or the fact that you could see that Ellie had been crying. Or maybe that was a normal look for her these days. Either way, I felt the guilt seep through what little armor I had left. “Well, Ellie, say goodbye to Sloane. We need to need to leave before
traffic gets too bad.”

  “It was wonderful to see you both.” I slid out of the chair and slowly walked them to their car.

  “I’ll call you later.”

  “Actually, I managed to lose my phone somewhere on the way back. I’m going to try to get another before I head back to my hotel.”

  “Oh, no, I’m sorry honey. I’ll let John know too.”

  “Thanks. I’d appreciate that.”

  Ellie gave me a wave goodbye, and I watched as they pulled away from the curb. Once they were out of sight, I covered my mouth to stop the sob that wanted to rip through from my core.

  When I got back into the hotel room, I switched my flight to the first one out in the morning. If I never had to leave the safety of Montana for the rest of my life, I would be completely fine with that.

  I hit the pillow hard. I needed to rest my head.

  ***

  Davie met me at the airport instead of Dell, and the drive was very quiet. I should have sucked it up and made small talk with him, but my mind was in a dark place, and I wasn’t sure I could trust my emotions. He glanced at me a few times and made a few attempts to say something but finally gave up and just drove.

  It wasn’t until we pulled into a school that I broke through the fog that held me captive.

  “Where are we?” I didn’t need any more surprises right now. I needed my normal back. My nerves were shot.

  “Sue asked if I could bring you here. Something about John.”

  Davie opened my door for me and offered a hand.

  “Yikes, you’re frozen, Sloane. I could have turned up the heat if you’d told me.”

  “Oh, that’s okay, Davie. It’s just been a long week. I think I’m just tired.” I followed him into the front office, where we quickly checked in, and then he steered me toward a gymnasium.

  The first three rows were all filled with the familiar faces of Shadows, and when Kelly spotted me, she stood and made her way over.

  “Hello again.” She gave me a hug, and Ellie smiled at me then looked away. “I was so hoping you were going to make it.”

  “What is this?” I tried to sound cheery.

  “No clue. Sue called me and said we needed to be at Livi’s school at eleven.”

  A man came up and asked us all to sit. Despite Kelly’s request to sit by them, I stood. I explained that I had been on so many planes lately, and I simply needed to stand. I found a spot over by the wall and leaned into it with a sigh as my head pounded and I prayed this wouldn’t be long. I needed a big glass of wine and my pillow.

  “Thank you all for coming today,” the man said clearly into the mic. I assumed he must be the principal. “These kids have worked so hard, and it means so much that you could make it. Without further ado, let’s get the show started.”

  Three performances and one that was questionable enough that I worried I wouldn’t be able to scrub from my memory later, and Livi took the stage. To my utter shock and surprise, John came in behind her carrying a stool and wearing—yes, it was a cowboy hat that matched Livi’s.

  I scanned the crowd and almost smiled as I saw Kelly holding on to Oliver’s arm. Ellie was drawing in a book. Cole and Savannah were leaning forward in their seats. Sue was crying already, and Daniel, who I saw had been released from hospital, was holding his phone in position to record whatever was about to happen. Just before I moved my gaze to the stage, I caught Doc Roberts watching me. I gave a polite nod, but he continued to watch me until Livi spoke into the mic.

  “Hello, everyone. Thank you for coming.” Her confident little voice bounced from the speakers, and my heart melted. “I’m Olivia Logan, and that’s my uncle John.” She pointed over her shoulder with a giggle. “I chose this song because my daddy and mommy sing it together when they put me to bed at night. It’s my favorite.” She grinned, and I could see Savanah barely was holding it together. Damn, even I was feeling it, and my eyes watered.

  John scanned the crowd, and I wondered if he was looking for me. I thought of waving, but then Livi gave him the signal to start.

  A country tune flowed from John’s guitar, and before she sang the first word, I recognized it. Fishin’ In The Dark by The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band.

  Our well-spoken little Miss Olivia had a gorgeous twang and a velvet voice. I knew Savannah was a singer, but wow, this little girl had talent. And when the chorus came, John stepped up to the mic, and they sang in harmony.

  And the dam broke.

  Tears started to fall, and I tried to stop my chin from quivering, but it was useless. My emotions were already at the surface, and it felt so good to cry over something sweet instead of frightening.

  John looked incredibly sexy in his dark button-up shirt, jeans, boots, and black cowboy hat. Olivia was in a jean dress, pink cowboy boots, and a matching black hat. Once the end came, the entire room erupted into a cheer that made my head hurt, but I didn’t care. They’d blown the entire house away! I was in awe.

  Standing outside in the hall, I felt someone step up to my side. It was Doc Roberts, and while everyone was greeting Livi and patting Cole—who couldn’t stop crying—on the back, I could feel his solid presence. Mark and Mike had flowers for Livi, and Keith gave her a bag of something. What? I had no clue.

  “Paintballs.” Doc Roberts answered my thoughts. “Keith made a deal that if she would sing for him in front of people, he would supply her with all the paintballs she needed to take down Mark’s twins.”

  I laughed, loving how awesome everyone was.

  “Do you want to talk about it, Sloane?”

  “What do you mean? Why do you ask?”

  He cleared his throat and rubbed his chin like he was thinking. “Did Savannah ever tell you about the time she was attacked by a fellow Blackstone member?”

  “No.” I swung around to meet his gaze.

  “It’s not my story to share, but my point of bringing it up is this. When people are hiding things, they don’t always realize they give off telltale signs.”

  “I’m not hiding anything.”

  He reached out to touch my forearm, and I flinched.

  Shit.

  “I’m tired. I guess I just need some sleep.”

  “My door is always open.” He patted my arm and smiled warmly then stepped away as Kelly approached.

  “Okay,” Kelly beamed, “when was someone going to tell me that my son could do that?”

  “There you are.” John wrapped his warm, protective arms around me and kissed my lips. “I missed you.” He leaned in and whispered, “You have no idea how much I missed you.”

  “Me too,” I responded quietly. “You were amazing out there.”

  “Wouldn’t have done it for anyone else.” He laughed. “Something about that little girl that I can’t say no to. We’re all going to go out to eat. Hope you’re up for it.” He waved at Livi, who was now being mauled by her parents, and there was no doubt she loved every moment of it.

  “It was okay.” Liam shrugged, and Doc Roberts gave him an elbow to the ribs. “Sorry.”

  “So, what happened to your phone?” John asked.

  “They took it,” Ellie blurted, and I felt my blood pressure drop.

  “Who took it?”

  Ellie looked at me like she was trying to remember, and I felt like the biggest asshole for asking her to keep something quiet.

  “Sloane?” John asked.

  “Long story.” I waved him off and folded my arms over my stomach. “I’m so tired, and I really need some sleep. Do you mind if I skip out on the dinner?”

  He studied me for a moment like he knew he something was up, but when Mia called out that they were leaving, he dropped the topic.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah. I feel like a zombie.”

  “Okay.” He hesitated but then called Davie over and asked him to drive me, as he was heading back anyway.

  Fifteen minutes later, we were pulling into the driveway and I dragged my weary ass inside.

  Not even a
hot shower, Advil, or clean clothes could make me feel right inside. I poured that much-needed glass of wine, had a good nap, then called my father.

  “Hey, honey. You’ve been hard to get hold of.”

  “Chasing leads.”

  “Yeah.” He paused. “You’re up late.”

  “I could say the same for you.”

  “Are you okay? You sound tired.”

  No.

  “Um, yeah.” I fumbled on my words. “How’s Mom?”

  “She’s good, busy with work. You know her. She likes to keep busy.”

  “Good.”

  “Sloane,” he cleared his throat, “are you happy?”

  “I am.” I wanted to cry.

  “Then why do you sound like you might cry?”

  I covered my mouth and stopped the urge to tell him everything. “Just a really long last few weeks.”

  “Well, why don’t you get some sleep and call me in the morning?”

  “Okay.” I swallowed down the knot in my throat.

  “Love you.”

  I hung up and cried myself back to sleep.

  ***

  Morning. Damn, only five a.m. I had the scent of Henry in my nostrils.

  Shit! I blew air out through my nose to rid myself of the smell.

  John wasn’t next to me, which explains why I had a nightmare again. Tripper’s nose poked me as he sensed I was awake. Every time I closed my eyes, I would smell Henry and see Ellie’s terrified face. Sleep wasn’t going to come back and visit me. The blinds were open, and I studied the darkness, picturing the one place that always brought John happiness.

  I held the flashlight as I made my way along the path. No more than three minutes into my walk, I heard branches moving and snow falling. I wanted to crawl out of my skin or scream so loud I’d wake the property, but I didn’t when someone in white Army gear blocked my path.

  “Morning.” He rested his hand on his weapon. “Beta Eight.” He patted his name tag. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”