Home Forever

by Cee Bowerman

  Zeke turned his head quickly and saw Freddie. He yelled and jolted back in his chair, scraping it on the tile to get away from the island. His coffee sloshed over the side of his mug and he jerked his hand back to shake it. Freddie took that opportunity to sprint over the island to the spot directly in front of Zeke. Freddie’s body was still, her tail waving and twitching, and she was right next to Zeke’s mug. They stared at each other, Zeke poised to run. Freddie, without looking down, dipped her paw in the spilled coffee and then brought her paw up to lick it. She did that a few times while watching Zeke intently. She put her paw down and curled her tail around her legs.

  “Awwww, little brother. The widdle puddy tat came out to meet you.” Sam laughed. “Didn’t you call me a pussy yesterday?”

  “Would you like some coffee and milk, Freddie?” Lisa asked. Freddie turned her head to stare at Lisa. “That’s a yes, I think. One sugar or two, my Queen?”

  Sam giggled. Zeke did not. Freddie was staring into his eyes again and Zeke didn’t seem to be able to move.

  ~*~

  I heard Zeke’s short yell and Sams’s laughter in my kitchen and rolled over to my back. My body was sore, but in a good way. I stretched and took stock of myself and decided this is a feeling I could get used to.

  Last night with Sam ran the spectrum of emotions. From frantic and fast to smooth and sweet, we had experienced it all together. We explored each other’s bodies, whispering to each other, sometimes laughing and other moments intense, realizing what we had missed through the years.

  There was more low speaking in the kitchen, so I thought I should investigate. The smell of the coffee was drawing me in, and I wondered if Lisa was up and around. I grabbed Sam’s shirt from the floor and a pair of sleep shorts from my drawer as I walked to the bathroom. When my morning business was finished I pulled my wild hair up in a clip on top of my head and brushed my teeth.

  All eyes, including Freddie’s, came to mine as I walked into the living room from my bedroom. I tipped my head up to kiss Sam as I moved next to him. Freddie was staring at me from his perch on the island and I reached up and found the sweet spot that had made him purr last night. I looked at my friends and realized that Zeke was staring at Freddie in fascination but everyone else in the room was watching Zeke’s face.

  My eyes turned to Lisa. She looked well rested. She had showered and put her hair up, just a little make up on her face, and she was dressed in her usual long-sleeved tee and jeans. She had her mug up in front of her lips, blowing on the hot coffee while she watched Zeke. The look of longing in her eyes made my heart hurt while at the same time I felt a little glimmer of hope for my friend.

  “Have you heard from Chandler yet?” Sam had re-positioned himself with his legs on either side of my hips as I moved closer to him to pet Freddie. “I checked my phone and don’t have anything new from Frank.”

  “Chandler should be getting to the office soon, I will give him a few and then call him.” Zeke replied. I looked to see that he was more relaxed, even holding his coffee, but he was still staring at Freddie.

  Sam’s lips kissed my shoulder and he reached around me to pick up his coffee.

  “You okay?” I asked Lisa as she passed me a steaming mug. She shot a glance at Zeke and then looked back to me.

  “I’m actually good. I slept better than I have in years.” Lisa reached across and squeezed my hand.

  “Love you, Carles.”

  “To the moon, sister. To the moon.” I winked at her. “So, what’s going today?”

  “I have an appointment with my new doctor, turns out she works out where Kari does. Zeke said that he would take me. He called Jace to come with us while we ride the motorcycle.”

  “I think that we should buddy up for a while, safety in numbers.” Zeke said. I felt Sam’s chest move as he nodded his head behind me. “You girls are with one or more of us all the time, no arguments or complications with that for a while, get it?”

  “Yes, Zeke. I get it. I argued with Sam about it for a minute last night but realize that was a lost cause.” I sipped my coffee. “I’m going to shower and then do my stretching. Lisa are we set for yoga?”

  “Yes. It’s a must. Been a few days. And you probably need to center yourself and work out some kinks, girlie.” Lisa winked at me. I smiled wide because she was right, but also because she seemed to be okay. So much better than the other times she had an episode like yesterday. “Delivery is between 10 and 2 today, all the boxes will be here.”

  “That reminds me, I need to get some of the guys up in the attic, have them bring your stuff here. You want that today?” Sam asked as he reached for his phone.

  “Let’s get all the boxes at once, get it all out of the way at one time. Not sure there is anything I can’t live without after all these years.” I turned to kiss Sam. “Shower?”

  I watched Sam’s eyes darken as he spun his chair to the side, moving my body with his legs. He reached for his coffee and crowded me to move to the bedroom. He put two fingers up with his free hand. “We’re out. Gonna need more clothes, brother.” He followed me to the bedroom. I heard Lisa and Zeke laughing softly.

  ~*~

  Sam and I undressed each other as the water warmed, I ran my hands over his chest tracing his tattoos with my fingers. He nibbled kisses down my neck and along my shoulders. He took my hand and let me into the shower, I stood facing him with my hair under the water.

  He held my face in his hands and kissed me softly.

  “I want to wake up every day with you in bed next to me, shower with you every morning, enjoy my coffee with you, make a life with you. Start a family with you, watch you love my children until we are old and gray.” he whispered.

  “Are you proposing?” I asked with a sly smile. My heart was pounding, the life he described was my dream too.

  “Not yet. Just making my intentions clear.” he reached for the shampoo and poured it in his hand. My eyes closed as he started close to my scalp, scrubbing my head. He moved his way down my hair, lathering to the ends and then pushed me gently back under the water. “Now the good stuff.” He said as he reached for my body wash.

  I rinsed my hair and conditioned it as he lathered the loofa. He started at my neck and worked his way down my chest making slow circles with his hands. I leaned my head back to rinse the conditioner as I felt his hands going further down my stomach. His fingers brushed against one of the long incision scars and I felt him flinch and jerk his hand back. He recovered quickly and moved his hand over a few inches to avoid the scar and his hand started moving down again. He pressed his palm to me and I could feel his fingers working at my entrance. I let out a little gasp when his finger entered me, and I rubbed on his hand. His mouth was on my neck as he pleasured me with his hand, the other going behind me and cupping my ass to keep me still.

  I was sensitive from all of our antics last night, but the heat started to build while he worked his magic. I could feel how hard he was and reached down to wrap my hand around him. I held him firmly, moving up and down in sync with his movements inside me. His mouth caught mine and our tongues tangled as he pressed deeper into me, the heel of his hand rubbing directly on my clit.

  I dropped my forehead to his shoulder so I could watch his hand against me. As I gripped him, moving up and down, occasionally running my thumb over the top to catch the moisture he increased the pressure with his hand. His mouth was nibbling and biting my neck and as I started tighten my grip to move my hand faster he moaned next to my hear.

  His hand was grinding into me and my hips started moving to show him the rhythm I needed to find my release. He started whispering in my ear all the naughty things I needed to hear to help get me there. I could feel it building inside me and gasped as I ground myself onto his hand. His mouth left my ear and moved down to my neck and as he pushed harder he bit me. The sharp pain mixed with the pleasure of his hand made me lose my control and I came on his hand. I threw my head back and moaned and heard him encouraging me. His h
and slowed but didn’t stop as I slowly came back to myself. I opened my eyes and his face was so close, his eyes staring into mine.

  “You’re beautiful, sweetheart, but when you come the look on your face is something else.” he kissed me softly on the lips as he pulled his hand from me. “Let me get under the water to get to my hair. I’m too tall for you to help so I’ll make it quick.”

  He turned us in the shower so that our places were reversed. He had his head leaned back into the water, his arms up moving through his hair. With his face pointed to the ceiling he reached to the shelf for the shampoo. He brought his chin down and kissed me quickly before he poured a good amount of shampoo into his hand. He rubbed his hands together and then put them to his face to scrub his beard. He moved his head back so the water came down the his face, rinsing his beard, the bubbles from the shampoo rushing down his body. I watched their path and decided to follow them. He closed his eyes, hands up scrubbing his hair, occasionally running a hand over his face. I knelt in front of him and took him in my mouth, wrapping a hand around him and the other behind his thigh to pull him to me.

  He jerked back and let out a roar. I looked up to see his head was bent forward, his hair all around his head, water and shampoo making trails from his head down his body. He was watching me. I pulled my mouth back.

  “Concentrate, you don’t want to get soap in your eyes.” He threw his head back under the water as my mouth closed over him again.

  19.

  After our shower Sam and I moved in tandem doing our new morning routine. He leaned over so I could dry his hair, then turned me around so he could dry mine. While we were still naked Sam helped me rub crème into my scars and we made small talk to pretend that caring for bullet wounds was an everyday thing to do with your partner.

  “I’m not gonna break, Sam.” In bed last night even after he mentioned them he flinched and pulled back when he got near my scars, I knew they bothered him but I didn’t want him to think he was hurting my feelings. This was unfamiliar territory for both of us and I knew I would have to tread lightly.

  “Carles, I hate that you were injured and there’s no way for me to fix it.” Sam said softly.

  “You don’t have to fix it. You didn’t give it to me, and the doctors already fixed it. But, you’re gonna have to get used to looking at it. And accidentally touching it sometimes.” He was rubbing the crème along the line that went around my hip.

  “I’m touching it right now, babe.” he said.

  “Like I’m gonna break. I’m not saying smack me on it, I’m just saying that if anything it has no feeling. Well it does but it’s weird, it doesn’t hurt but just weird. But in the shower, and last night, it was like you avoided that part of me. But that is part of me.” I tried to explain.

  “So what are you saying? I just need to pretend I don’t see that some fucker tried to kill you? Pretend it’s not there?” Sam was getting irritated, and I didn’t want that. I couldn’t find the words to explain. “I know it’s ugly...” his head came up and the look on his face was stormy.

  “Nothing about you is ugly, inside or out. You’ve got a fucking road map of your shit on the outside of your body. I look at it and think that I couldn’t take that pain for you, and if I could’ve would I have even been able to handle it? It makes me think that this life is short and people are fucking crazy and I have missed so many years already. What if you get sick? What if I lose you?” his voice was strong but broke on the last questions.

  “Any of us could get sick. I’m living without one of my organs. People do that shit all the time because of illness or injury or fuck, I don’t know, aliens or some shit. But they pick up and walk on and live. I’m gonna do that. I’ll be next to you until I can’t be any more.” I put my hands on his cheeks and pulled his face to mine. “Walking across the street can be dangerous, I could slip in the tub and conk my head, we ride that bike like we are immortal and we know what can happen there. I’m not glass, sweetheart, but thank you for thinking I am.”

  “I love you Carles, this is new. It’s our new normal, might take a bit for me to get used to it. But for you I will.” he leaned down and kissed me softly.

  I felt better after talking to him. I hadn’t had the guts to show my scar to anyone other than doctors and nurses until I ripped my shirt up in a rage when I was pissed at his sister. I wore yoga clothes that showed my belly around Lisa and Joe but hadn’t ever in front of anyone else. I decided today would be a first. I would put on my yoga clothes and not care that Zeke or Sam or anyone else who showed up could see me.

  Sam silently finished helping me put the crème on and then we left the bathroom to dress. Zeke had again brought over clothes for Sam to put on after his shower. Sam was now wearing his customary faded jeans with a t shirt, still barefoot. I put on my yoga clothes, a neon pink top that showed my midriff and most of my scar, and coordinating black leggings shot through with pink and grey that reached almost to my ankles. Even though it was still wet I twisted my hair into a bun on the top of my head and put sunscreen on my face rather than make up.

  Sam watched me dress and then helped me make the bed. As I walked past him to the bedroom door he stopped me with a hand on my hip and knelt down to kiss me right where I had been shot. He lifted his head and smiled.

  My heart melted. Words couldn’t describe how much I loved this man.

  He stood, put his hand on the small of my back, his palm over one of my scars and directed me out the bedroom door. Baby steps, I thought to myself.

  ~*~

  Lisa and Carlie were on yoga mats in the shaded area of the yard while Sam, Zeke and Jace sat on the patio with their coffee mugs in hand. Jace had been facing the yard but when the girls started their stretches he could see that maybe he needed to let his brothers enjoy the view, and he didn’t need to think those kinds of thoughts about their women, so he moved to a chair facing his brothers.

  “I called Bennie and he has his cop friend looking into it. The guys have a schedule and they will be around all day, somewhere close when you leave here, but in places you and anyone else probably won’t even notice them while you’re in the house.” Jace told his brothers. “We are all getting pretty good at this with all the practice we have watching Kari and her girls.”

  “They all good right now?” Sam asked his brothers. His eyes never left Carlie. She was doing something where her ass was up in the air and her head was almost touching the ground.

  “There’s a new girl. She is pregnant. Won’t leave her apartment. Don’t know her story but the doc goes to her once a day for a few hours to try and help her out. Kari will help her out. No word on if someone might be chasing her.” Jace answered.

  “Mmmmhhhmmm.” Zeke noticed that Lisa had moved to her back and had her legs up with her toes touching the ground above her head.

  “What?” Sam asked.

  “I’ve decided that I don’t like the life I lead so I am going to buy a guitar and join a country band. Then

  I am going to marry a woman named Stargazer and have hippie babies with her out in California.” Jace was looking from one brother to another, they were almost drooling. He reached behind him and pulled his phone out of his pocket. He hit the right buttons and held it up and took pictures of his brothers faces and neither one of them noticed. He decided that the girls had that duck face thing going a few years ago so he was going to label this one yoga face.

  “Before I go though I am going to burn all our buildings down so I can collect the insurance money.” he said absently while he sent the pictures to Kari with the caption ‘Gone yoga stupid over here.’

  “So, her insurance is going to pay the doc for her time?” Zeke asked Jace.

  “Yep. Gonna pay her in wishes and prayers, got that shit all worked out. Do you think that I could lift your wallets right now or would you notice?” Jace asked as he studied his brothers faces, occasionally picking his phone up and snapping a picture more pictures for later blackmail.

  Whatev
er was happening behind him in the grass had both his big brothers with coffee mugs almost to their lips but their heads were tilted to the left so far their cheeks were almost touching their shoulders.

  “Okay then!” Jace slapped his hands on his thighs. Both his brothers jumped, Sam’s coffee sloshed over the edge of his cup and he jumped again. Zeke shook his head like he was in a fog. “I’m gonna head out since you guys have lost the ability to communicate. Any more blood goes down in your pants and ya’ll will both need transfusions. Jesus, boys. Creepin’ me the fuck out.”

  “Sorry dude, she’s just...” and Sam’s head tilted again as he let the sentence die off. Zeke’s head started to tilt back to the side also.

  Jace just shook his head and walked down the steps and around the house to get to his bike. He made sure that he never looked over his shoulders to see the women who he was positive would someday both be mothers to his nephews and nieces in positions that might make him stupid. He waited until he had walked his motorcycle to the end of the driveway before he turned it on. No sense ruining the girls Zen or the boys show, he thought to himself.

  ~*~

  Joe walked across the grass and stepped up onto the patio in front of Sam and Zeke. He sat in the chair that he had seen their brother get up from just a few minutes ago. Neither man noticed that Joe was there. He moved his fingers to his mouth and let out a sharp whistle. Both boys jumped and Tuff came barreling out of the doggie door.

  “You guys gonna be lookin’ out for my girls you’re gonna have to quit thinkin’ with your dicks.” Zeke looked down at the ground and Sam glared at him.

  “We were watching them. They are safe.” Sam retorted.

  “Where’s your brother?” Joe asked. Zeke looked up and turned his head to look behind him.

  “Where’d he go?” Zeke asked Sam. Sam looked around and looked back at Joe.

  “Okay. Point taken. Shit.” Sam rubbed his hands over his face. “My bad. What’s up?”