Becoming Bodhisattvas

by Pema Chodron

So this is something you should read repeatedly.

  5.106

  From time to time, for sake of brevity,

  Consult the Digest of the Sutras.

  And those two works peruse with diligence

  That noble Nagarjuna has composed.

  Unfortunately these texts are difficult to find or have not yet been translated. There are other books, however, that will inspire us and keep us from going astray. When times are tough, reading a dharma book or listening to a tape can help us to stay sane.

  5.107

  Whatever in these works is not proscribed

  Be sure to undertake and implement.

  And what you see there, perfectly fulfill,

  And so safeguard the minds of worldly beings.

  Since we may not have these texts, we could safely say that whatever Shantideva does not prohibit in The Way of the Bodhisattva, we could undertake and implement and so safeguard the minds of worldly beings, including our own.

  5.108

  To keep a guard again and yet again

  Upon the state and actions of our thoughts and deeds—

  This and only this defines

  The nature and the sense of mental watchfulness.

  To conclude this chapter, Shantideva returns to taming the mind. In our daily activities, we can again and yet again practice mindfulness and alertness, recognizing when we’re distracted and gently, even joyfully, coming back to being present. And when the kleshas begin to get their hooks in us, we can always do the noble practice of remaining like a log.

  5.109

  But all this must be acted out in truth,

  For what is to be gained by mouthing syllables?

  What invalid was ever helped

  By merely reading in the doctor’s treatises?

  If we’re just mouthing syllables from a book, nothing will ever change. Unless we’re willing to apply Shantideva’s instructions when and where they’re needed, our minds will remain wild and we’ll continue to be ruled by our kleshas.

  Working with Anger

  Patience, Part One

  CHAPTER 6 OF The Way of the Bodhisattva gives further instructions for remaining steady when confronted by the kleshas. Here Shantideva presents the paramita of patience as the most effective way possible to work with anger. In verses 1 through 12, he presents his case against this powerful klesha.

  6.1

  Good works gathered in a thousand ages,

  Such as deeds of generosity,

  Or offerings to the blissful ones—

  A single flash of anger shatters them.

  Everyone already knows that anger is destructive. But to emphasize the immensity of this destruction, Shantideva makes a statement that generations of readers have found disturbing: one flash of anger can destroy years of ethical conduct and virtuous actions.

  We know the familiar scenario of being in a harmonious relationship, when suddenly there’s a nasty incident. One minute there’s love and friendship; the next minute one of us is out of control. The physical or verbal abuse can wipe out months of goodness. And even if we apologize, it takes a long time to rebuild trust. So even a single flash of anger has long-term consequences.

  According to some commentaries, this verse goes even further and addresses the anger that we don’t regret and that we actually justify. We can stubbornly hold on to our anger for lifetimes, like the family feuds and ethnic rivalries that go on for centuries. I know two brothers who live next door to each other, but haven’t spoken to each other in twenty-five years. This is what Shantideva talks about: anger we condone, hold on to, and remain unwilling to examine.

  Once we recognize the unnecessary pain our anger causes, we are already on the way to undermining its power and its ability to shatter years of good will. That, of course, is precisely what Shantideva wants us to understand.

  We all have parts of ourselves that seem unworkable and cause us grief. If we are habitually angry, then exploring this can become a major part of awakening bodhichitta. Shantideva assumes each of us has the ability to free ourselves from the tyranny of the kleshas. No matter what we’ve done, none of us are doomed.

  But what are these good works that can be shattered in a flash? Good works that can be so quickly destroyed are superficial: superficial acts of generosity, superficial offerings to the buddhas. These are not the good works that transform us at the core. Fortunately, a fundamental change of heart can never be lost.

  The merit gained from virtuous acts that are merely ritualistic is easily destroyed by angry outbursts. In Asia, for example, it’s common for Buddhists to offer money to build temples. But if their generosity is simply an outer gesture to gain merit, it could actually increase self-importance rather than dissolve it. You could be a high-powered business person doing all kinds of shady deals, and think you’re accumulating merit by performing conventional acts of virtue. But these superficial acts, while they might have some virtuous consequences, are destroyed by the power of rage.

  If you’re aggressive in your dealings, that’s how you’ll be regarded in the world. You might smile and give generously, but if you frequently explode in anger, people never feel comfortable in your presence and you’ll never have peace of mind.

  6.2

  No evil is there similar to anger,

  No austerity to be compared with patience.

  Steep yourself, therefore, in patience—

  In all ways, urgently, with zeal.

  Verse 2 summarizes the theme of this chapter: the benefits of patience and the harm caused by anger. The underlying meaning of the word evil is to intentionally cause harm, to take pleasure in causing pain and, as Shantideva says, no evil is there similar to anger. Because striking out in anger can become a habitual response to stress and discomfort, Shantideva passionately encourages us to unwind this old habit rather than continue to strengthen it.

  In his book Healing Anger, the Dalai Lama recommends using the word hatred instead of anger. There are times, he says, when anger is appropriate, but hatred is never justified. Anger can be motivated by compassion, but hatred is always accompanied by ill will. I find this distinction helpful.

  Nevertheless, at times we may find ourselves consumed by hatred. To work with these times, Shantideva introduces us to the austerity of patience. I find it significant that he calls patience an austerity. It indicates that what we go through when we refrain from escalating the kleshas takes courage.

  6.3

  Those tormented by the pain of anger

  Will never know tranquillity of mind—

  Strangers they will be to every pleasure;

  Sleep departs them, they can never rest.

  When we’re angry about something, most of us think about it feverishly; we can’t sleep at night or find any peace of mind.

  There are various ways you can deal with this situation. The first thing you can do is get in touch with how anger feels in your body. We don’t usually pay attention to the physical anguish anger causes. Sensitizing yourself to that pain can motivate you to work more eagerly with aggression.

  Another practice I recommend is done during meditation. If you’ve been angry, you can intentionally replay the whole story. Pay attention to your feelings and thoughts. Are they obsessive and repetitive? Do they fuel your grudges or judgments? Then, while gently breathing in and out, take the feeling of anger as the focus of your meditation. Give it your full attention, without moving away from it by repressing or acting it out. Try to experience the anger nonverbally by getting to know its qualities. What color is it? What temperature? How does it smell or taste? This practice puts us in touch with emotions very directly and lessens the sense of struggle.

  Another instruction that I’ve found helpful is to stay with your soft spot. Below the anger is enormous
tenderness, which most of us quickly cover over with the hardness of rage. Learning to touch that vulnerability isn’t easy, but it can keep you from exploding and destroying everything in sight.

  6.4

  Noble chieftains full of hate

  Will be attacked and slain

  By even those who look to them

  For honors and possessions.

  6.5

  From family and friends estranged,

  And shunned by those attracted by their bounty,

  Men of anger have no joy,

  Forsaken by all happiness and peace.

  This exemplifies the kind of rage that shatters our good works. Noble chieftains full of hate from family and friends estranged—these are the abusive parents or partners, the abusive bosses. They terrify everyone, even their own children and those who rely on them for food, promotions, and well-being. If you’ve ever been in such relationships, you know that any lack of gratitude for what these people provide outrages them even more. Because they’re so explosive and unpredictable, even their gestures of friendliness or generosity are seen as untrustworthy. They aren’t able to see how their anger destroys trust and respect.

  Shantideva urges us to see that abusive people have no joy or peace of mind. They shatter their own happiness by justifying their anger; and the very people they expect to love and honor them have the strongest aversion.

  The point, however, is not the noble chieftains. The point is to acknowledge our own anger and the way it harms us as much as it harms others.

  6.6

  All these ills are brought about by wrath,

  Our sorrow-bearing enemy.

  But those who seize and crush their anger down

  Will find their joy in this and future lives.

  The next time we want to justify our anger, if we think of it as our sorrow-bearing enemy, we might be motivated to refrain from fueling the fire. Of course, we don’t literally seize and crush our anger; this language just makes it clear that we have to work with it assiduously.

  The advice Shantideva gives here is advice for healing a universal dilemma: the dilemma of getting hooked and carried away by rage. We could do this work not only for our own sake but for all humanity. Instead of regarding ourselves as angry and messed up, we could identify with all those who are working to heal a universal illness. Siding with our courage instead of our neurosis is an important shift of allegiance.

  6.7

  Getting what I do not want,

  And all that hinders my desire—

  There my mind finds fuel for misery;

  Anger springs from it, oppressing me.

  6.8

  Therefore I will utterly destroy

  The sustenance of this my enemy,

  My foe, whose sole intention is

  To bring me injury and sorrow.

  What triggers our anger? According to Shantideva, it’s getting what we don’t want and not getting what we desire. When we’re heavily invested in our likes and dislikes, tiny reactions can escalate into violence and war. When we’re afraid of getting stuck with something we don’t want or deprived of what we need, our thoughts come in as reinforcements and escalate our anger and pain.

  Full-blown, destructive anger starts with subtle shenpa, an uncomfortable feeling that things aren’t going our way. It’s helpful to recognize this uneasiness before it escalates. If, however, we’ve already gotten angry, we could still try to find the patience to not act or speak. It’s never too late to put an embargo on the fuel of misery: at any point in the process, we can pause and practice patience.

  Trungpa Rinpoche used to say that when something like anger arises, we should regard it as “not me.” Just think of it as a little bug trying to land on you: if your mind remains open and free of bias, the bug has nowhere to light. Shantideva, in his own words, is saying the same thing. Anger is not “me,” it’s just dynamic energy. If we don’t identify with it, that energy remains unfixated and free. If it freezes into “want” and “don’t want,” however, we can accurately predict the outcome. It will cause us, the basically good us, to suffer.

  6.9

  So come what may, I’ll never harm

  My cheerful happiness of mind.

  Depression never brings me what I want;

  My virtue will be warped and marred by it.

  In his typically enthusiastic style, Shantideva rouses himself: So come what may, I’ll never harm my cheerful happiness of mind. This joy is a feeling of workability: our life and mind are workable. Shantideva’s intention is to help us realize this.

  His cheerfulness comes in part from knowing that it never helps to indulge in depression and discontent. The instruction is to interrupt discouragement’s momentum: interrupt the story line and return to the immediacy of your experience, no matter how unpleasant. A good description of patience is learning to relax with the edginess of our energy.

  6.10

  If there is a remedy when trouble strikes,

  What reason is there for despondency?

  And if there is no help for it,

  What use is there in being sad?

  Shantideva instructs us to stand back from the heat of our anger and not get entangled. If we’re caught in a traffic jam, for example, what’s the point of fuming? If there’s a remedy like an off-ramp, there’s no need to be upset. But if there are cars as far as the eye can see and no way out, then obsessing only makes us unhappier.

  If you can do something about your situation, then do it. And if there’s nothing to do, it’s ridiculous to get all worked up. This is Shantideva’s advice for stress reduction.

  6.11

  Pain, humiliation, insults, or rebukes—

  We do not want them

  Either for ourselves or those we love.

  For those we do not like, it’s quite the opposite!

  Shantideva is teaching in an eighth-century Indian monastery, yet some things never change! He presents another situation that fuels our anger: not wanting insults or humiliation for ourselves or our loved ones, but being glad when bad things happen to those we dislike. Both extremes are kindling for the fire of remaining ornery.

  6.12

  The cause of happiness comes rarely,

  And many are the seeds of suffering!

  But if I have no pain, I’ll never long for freedom;

  Therefore, O my mind, be steadfast!

  Verses 11 and 12 go together. We have the intelligence to understand that we cause suffering by rejecting pain for ourselves, while wanting it for others. If we remain in this self-absorbed state, then the cause of happiness comes rarely, and many are the seeds of suffering!

  For angry people, the causes of suffering are everywhere. When they relate to others, they are easily provoked. The older they get, the touchier they become. More and more situations cause them discomfort, but fortunately this can shift. When the mind is less reactive, the causes of happiness increase. Then these very same situations no longer provoke us.

  This is definitely the direction to go. If we think of ourselves ten years from now, don’t we want fewer causes of suffering and more causes of happiness?

  Shantideva then takes another tack: pain can also be helpful. Without pain, we would never long for freedom. This optimistic view can cheer us up. Without suffering, we would never look for a way out; we’d never be motivated to tame our minds or practice patience.

  With verse 12, Shantideva concludes his discussion on the drawbacks of anger and the reasons to apply its antidote, patience.

  Next, he explains three categories of patience. The first category is the patience that comes from reframing our attitude toward discomfort. The second category is the patience that comes from understanding the complexity of any situation. The th
ird category is the patience that comes from developing tolerance.

  6.13

  The Karna folk, devoted to the Goddess,

  Endure the meaningless austerities

  Of being cut and burned.

  Why am I so timid on the path of freedom?

  Verse 13 begins the discussion on reframing our attitude toward discomfort. We all need this encouragement. Once we’ve refrained from escalating the kleshas, then what? As practitioners, we need some advice on how to remain steady with the edgy energy that often remains. We may not be acting out; we may be interrupting our thoughts, but then we’re left to relate sanely with the withdrawal symptoms.

  This method of developing patience is interesting to contemplate in a culture with such a low tolerance for mental or physical distress.

  We are inundated with advertisements telling us we deserve to be comfortable and happy. But, believe me, with the austerity of patience, we will experience some pain. At the very least, the kleshas and their underlying restlessness will become more obvious and vivid. As I’ve said before, there’s no way to get free of old addictions without going through the “detox period.”

  The Karna folk endured austerities of cutting and burning to attain spiritual insights. If they could endure such meaningless austerities—meaningless, in Shantideva’s opinion, because they don’t lead to irreversible liberation—why am I so timid on the path of freedom?

  Maybe we are hesitant because we’re not so sure about the payoff. The fruits of the spiritual path are ineffable and usually not immediate. Working patiently with the kleshas can be very uncomfortable. When our self-importance gets punctured, we might know intellectually that it’s cause for rejoicing, but, at a gut level, it hurts and we don’t like it. The only reason we put up with everyday hassles such as stressful jobs is the reassuring certainty of a salary or some other reward.