by Ain Soph
Edric looked at me first in surprise, then confusion, and as my heart sunk, his expression changed to one of cold realization. I’ll never forget. It was the harshest face I’ve ever seen Edric make and it was directed toward me. In my mind, I just needed some time alone, and if Lucie would have adjusted to us leaving better than she did, I would have been able to have both time alone and space between Timberwood and myself. It had nothing to do with Edric. To me, Edric was still my best friend- I was never running from him. But to Edric, it looked like I stayed in Timberwood, consciously avoiding him. The boys I had seen enter the fields turned around and called for Edric to hurry and catch up. I held my breath, waiting for him to say something, but he looked away without saying a word and ran past me, bumping into my shoulder as though I wasn’t even there. With our complicated history and Edric’s feelings toward me still a mystery, I hope he’ll actually be willing to help get into the Dagger Corps camp. Two days ago was the first time I saw him in four years, and it’s hard to tell how he feels about me from the few minutes we spent together outside the Remnant camp. He doesn’t seem like he’s holding on to the bitterness of the past, but Edric could always put on a good show when he needed to.
I grab the vase and start heading back toward Mori’s house. Along the way, my mind touches on Dryden and my failing search for him. Lately, it feels like I’ve given up, but I just keep coming across dead ends. I have connections and I was able to use what little I have to try to find information, but if Dryden is missing or dead, I’d have no way of finding out. Sometimes, being a lone wolf works against me. If someone lives under the radar, it makes it harder for me to find them. I don’t network enough to have the contacts I need and it’s leaving Dryden’s trail cold. I wonder if Edric will be able to help with Dryden. First though, I need to ask him about the Dagger Corps leader. I don’t know if Edric’s going to be willing to help at all and if I’m able to get even one favor out of him, it’s going to have to be for my best lead and that’ s the Dagger Corps leader. That’s my priority right now. I don’t even know if Dryden has any information about the Reapers. At this point, I just mainly want to find him so that I can tell him about Isoline. I know what it feels like to lose a sister, and Dryden deserves to know Isoline loved him and was fearless and intelligent in her pursuit of the locket. It’s important to me that he knows, but, as usual, the Scarlet Reapers have to come first.
I hope Mori’s back from the town market, so I can ask her where Edric’s staying while he visits. It’s about time I get started on my mission. Now that I finally have one after all this time (and it’s a promising lead), I’m anxious to begin. I pound my boots on the steps and reach for the front door knob, hoping I didn’t lock it on my way out. I jimmy the handle and sigh when I realize it’s locked. Thankfully, Mori mentioned a spare in the note she left me this morning. I grab it from a patch of flowers beside the steps and unlock the door, pushing it open slightly before freezing in the doorway. Mori’s humming the kitchen while putting away groceries, and beside her, sitting on a worn stool at the kitchen island, is Edric.
Mori turns around with a big smile and motions for me to come inside, “Look who I found while I was out getting groceries!” she places a hand on Edric’s shoulder and my eyes drop to where she’d touching him, causing Edric to give me a lazy smirk. “I remembered that you said you wanted tot talk to him, so I figured that I’d just go ahead and ask him to come here to make things easier for you I’m glad I did too. You made the house look absolutely beautiful, Luxem. I would have felt terrible if I didn’t do something for you in return. Hopefully me bringing Edric here will make things a little easier for you.” Edric’s being here does help me, but I thought I’d have more time to prepare. Now, with Edric here in front of me, I have to think fast about how I’m going to explain my current situation to him. It feels impossible to even find a starting point. It seems like Mori is in a better mood though, from last night. Maybe she isn’t fully recovered (her smiles seem a little forced), but she at least has the strength to put on a show. Her and Edric were always eerily similar in their behaviors.
Edric hops up from the stool and starts to help Mori put away some of the groceries. I’m still awkwardly standing in the doorway while they’re having easy conversation and light banter back and forth. I want to go in and join them, but I’m caught off guard and I don’t know what to say. Mori tries to draw me in to the conversation by turning to me and thanking me for making the house look “like one of the leader’s mansions.” Edric turns around and gives me a teasing grin, “Yeah, Luxie. Good job. I had no idea you were so domestic.” He’s keeping his tone light enough to where Mori thinks he’s actually being genuine, but I can see his eyes and they have nothing but laughter in them. My cheeks start burning as I realize I still have to give Mori the vase of flowers I picked for her. I know Edric’s going to be struggling to hold in his laughter while I hand over the bouquet. If I knew Edric was going to be here when I returned, maybe I would have practiced my fighting instead. Broke some trees in half. It would have been better than picking a sunset of flowers.
“Here, Mori.” I hesitate for a second and look over at Edric as he give me a slow grin, his eyes widening in excitement. He’s eating all of this up. I give him a hard glare and lift my chin, refusing to back down. Instead, I keep my focus trained on Mori, “I got you some flowers. I thought they could maybe brighten up your dining room..or something like that. It helped pass the time until you got back.”
Mori gasped in surprise, “Oh, thank you, honey!” She grabs the vase from my hands and pulls me into the kitchen, kicking the door closed behind her. I lean against the counter while Mori carefully places the vase in the center of the metal table. “You know, Edric, Luxem here only came back into town for you.” Mori gives Edric a quick wink amd I grunt in annoyance and embarrassment. I have serious mercenary work that I need to discuss with him and Mori’s insinuation that my reason for meeting him is any other than professional is irritating. I take myself seriously and I don’t want Edric getting the wrong idea about me- especially if I’m going to convince him to help me.
“Oh did she now?” Edric asks, quirking an eyebrow at me. I roll my eyes and shake my head at him, preparing to set the record straight but before I can say anything, I’m interrupted by Mori.
“She just got here last night! I don’t know how long Luxem’s here in town for or really why she returned- although I’m very excited you’re here at all. I’ve missed you so much, honey,” Mori hurries to add with a quick nod toward me. “But she said that she wanted to see you and that she’d be here until she was able to do just that.” Mori nods her head in satisfaction and plops down on one of the chairs, worn out from her shopping trip.
Edric leans back against the counter and crosses his arms, “Is that so?” he mutters. His eyes are intense, but they don’t have the same predatory glint they had at the Remnant camp. They seem to be focused on something far away- as though he’s deep in thought (about what, I don’t know).
I lean against the doorway and shake my head, “It did not happen like that, Mori!” She’s been wanting Edric and I to get together since we were children, never understanding that the probability of that happening is slim to none. When we were just kids, Edric and I didn’t see each other like that, so any sort of romance was never in the cards for us, and now, our relationship is too far gone. Edric’s been nothing but courteous and laid back since we reunited, but there’s a small part of me that’s certain he’s still hanging on to some form of bitterness. Mori doesn’t know how thing ended between and Edric and I, and her trying to play matchmaker (with only half the information, nonetheless) isn’t making rekindling our relationship any easier. When we were kids, we could just laugh it off, but we don’t have that same easy going friendship anymore. The room is starting have an awkward vibe and I shift my feet uncomfortably, hoping to change the mood. “I do need to talk to you, Edric, but I’m warning you- it’s serious. It’s probably best to not go
into it so lighthearted. Mori has made things seem...a little more easy going than they actually are.” I give Mori a small smile to let her know I’m not upset with her before looking at Edric’s unsmiling face. I can’t get a read on what he’s thinking, so instead of continuing any further, I just stay silent.
Mori looks between us and excuses herself, mumbling something about needing to take a little nap after grocery shopping, that she isn’t as young as she used to be. Edric and I look at one another for a moment before he uncrosses his arms and rests them on the counter behind him. “Well?” he starts, “I’m all yours, Lux. If it’s important to you, I’m willing to listen in all seriousness. What’s important to you is important to me.” I take a deep breath and meet his eyes. I hope he means every word he just said, because meeting with the Dagger Corps leader is more important to me right now than anything.
“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”
-George Bernard Shaw
CHAPTER EIGHT
After Mori left Edric and I alone in the kitchen to talk, I catch him up on the recent developments from the past couple days. Before talking to him, I was worried that I wouldn’t know how to explain things or even how to start, but after asking Edric if he remembers where we met a couple days ago, the story pours out of me. In a few spots, I stumble over my words, and when I reach the more emotional parts of the story, I have to pause and catch myself. I don’t want to cry in front of him, but talking about Ulric’s confession and the deaths of the Remnants make my throat thick with tears. While I’m talking, Edric’s face remains unreadable. Eventually he just crosses his arms and leans back against the kitchen counter with his head down (to where I can’t see his expression). I explain the Remnant’s role in the kidnappings and the possibility of there being multiple militias involved with the Reaper’s project. Edric nods his head along, but remains silent as I talk, the first hint of expression during the entire conversation appearing on his face when I tell him I need his help to talk to the Dagger Corps leader. I was worried he’d be upset with my request. After all, if my meeting with the Dagger Corps leader too a turn for the worst, it will be his head served on a platter, but Edric actually looks pleasantly surprised that I need his help. A slight grin forms on his face as he turns his head toward the counter so I can only see his profile. When I finish speaking, the kitchen stays silent for a moment before Edric turns toward me with an exaggerated sigh, “Well, Luxie, looks like we’re busting into the Dagger Corps leader’s office, aren’t we?” He gives me a wink and crosses his forearms, resting them a top his head while waiting for my reply.
“Wait,” I gape at him in disbelief. “Believe me, Edric, I’m grateful you’re going to help me, but I just poured a ton of information on you and that’s seriously all that you have to say?” I’m angry at his apparent lack of care. “I’ve been working for the militia that took Lucie, Edric. They took her. And then, Ulric murdered all of those innocent people. And furthermore, how are you not even a little bit curious about how your leader found out about the Remnants being a part of the kidnappings? Your last mission was to tell Ulric that the Dagger Corps knew about Project Artian, and you’re telling me that you never, for one second, felt curious about what Project Artian could be?” I throw myself down on the couch and take a few deep breaths to calm myself down before glaring at Edric. He loved Lucie as much as I did, so how was he able to hear what the Remnants did to her and still have a smile on his face?
Edric shrugs and looks away from me as he responds, “Basically, you told me a bunch of information that isn’t relevant to me right now. The Remnants are dead, there’s some random militia out there that may or may not be involved in the kidnappings, and then, there’s what we’ve known all along. The Scarlet Reapers are behind the disappearances. So the little bit of information I need to actually focus on is the fact that you need to see the Dagger Corps leader and you need my help to do it. I’m your guy, Lux, and honestly, that’s all that matters to me right now.” Edric pauses before mumbling, “And nothing that you told me will bring my dad back. If the Remnants captured him and he was taken for experimentation by the Reapers, then he’s more than likely dead and there’s nothing I can do about that.” He sighs and rubs the back of his neck before thinking a moment, “And you already know that I’m sorry about Lucie, Lux. You know that I wish there’s something I can do to make it all better and make your grief go away, but there isn’t. Most likely, she met the same fate as my dad, and I can’t focus on the ghosts of the past. That’s actually a big part of Dagger Corps mercenary training. When someone passes away, you don’t dwell on it; you move on. That’s how you survive. And it’s helped me a lot, Lux. Maybe it can help you too.” Edric bites his lip and looks uncertainly at my face. His intentions are pure. He wants to help; he wants to take my pain away. I understand that, but what Edric is suggesting is a complete disservice to those who were kidnapped- who are possibly dead. I had to shut my emotions off before they consumed me, but at least I let them in. Edric isn’t even allowing himself to feel grief over their disappearances. He’s acting like an Artif, and this is an Edric that I neither know, nor understand.
I recoil away from Edric like I’ve been slapped. He has no idea how deep my pain over the loss of Lucie goes. He lost his dad, and I feel for him, but I lost my entire family. I had everything ripped away from me because of Project Artian, and the betrayal of the Remnants still affects me to my core. I trusted them. I’ve been trying so hard to hold myself together since Lucie’s disappearance, but hitting non stop dead ends, losing Isoline, learning the truth about the Remnants, and now, the realization that Edric has changed beyond repair, is crushing me. “Move on? That’s your advice for me? To suck it up and move on” I draw a sharp breath and close my eyes. My emotions are in a constant state of flux and I need to take a second to think about what I want to do. I want to scream at Edric, to hit him, to tell him that Lucie deserves better than his half-hearted response, but that isn’t going to get me anywhere. I need his help to meet with the Dagger Corps leader. In the end, I just need to go along with Edric and do what’s necessary to accomplish my mission. I need to bury my emotions for now, and do what I have to in order to complete the mission. And afterward, I’ll leave and never look back. The first time I walked away from Edric, I left with regrets. This time, I’ll be gone for good. There was one topic Edric hasn’t addressed though, and I’m curious to hear his answer on it. His response will most likely only disappoint me, but I want to ask anyway. “What about Project Artian? The Dagger Corps somehow found out about it. Aren’t you curious?”
Edric shrugs his shoulders again and bites his thumbnail in thought, “Maybe a little bit, but not enough to let it affect me or my relationship with them. If anything, I think this proves that they’re one of the good guys. Regardless of how they found out about it, the Dagger Corps was quick to take action. They wanted to go after the Remnants and do their part in shutting Project Artian down. So actually, I guess in the end, I’m not that curious. They’re the good guys in all of this and that’s good enough for me.”
I don’t have a response for him. No, none of the information I told him is going to bring back any of our lost family and friends, but it clears up a lot of unanswered questions. I finally understand how hard it is to locate the Reapers and I heard about Project Artian for the first time. Before talking to Ulric, experimentation on humans and machines was just a rumor I heard while passing through different towns. Now, I know that it’s true, and with that, I understand why the kidnappings are happening. Maybe I’m not any closer to finding the Reapers than before, but at least I have more information and an attainable lead I can follow through with. I’m disappointed in Edric for not seeing things the same way I do. We used to always be on the same wavelength- almost as if we shared one mind. What happened to us? If this was the Edric of five years ago, he would have understood and agreed with everything I’m thinking and feeling. Now though, he
’s different. Edric is just so...different- so changed. At first I though being a part of the Dagger Corps didn’t change him, and it seems Mori thinks the same way I did. With this conversation though, I realize Edric’s become just another stereotypical mercenary, living just to please his militia, without a single original thought in his mind. He’s lost all of his curiosity and sense of adventure. Now, the world is simplified to him. Edric lives for whatever mission the Dagger Corps gives him, and at the end of the day, he goes to bed still awaiting new orders to complete. He’s been completely transformed into a Dagger Corps lapdog.
But with that said, I have to question his motives for helping me. Did the Dagger Corps even allow their mercenaries to take on rogue missions? Most militias don’t allow anything rogue, but the Dagger Corps also seem to keep their mercenaries on a tighter leash than most other militias. Edric said all that matters to him is the fact that I need his help, but is that because of our previous friendship or is there something more behind his words? I don’t like feeling indebted or helpless, and I still don’t know what kind of relationship Edric thinks we have. I’ve made up my mind about him, but I have no idea what he thinks of me. Is he still angry and just good at hiding it or does he genuinely want to help out someone he once considered a good friend? Does he still see me as a friend or are those days over to him? Instead of addressing anything Edric said to me, I decide the safest route of conversation is to ask him about our next course of action.
