Singe

by Casey Hays

  “I know you’re frustrated, as you should be.” She shoves a chunk of her thick hair off her shoulder. “You had expectations that have not been met. Problems that weren’t foreseen.” She pauses. “But Jude, the progress you’ve made is astounding. You say you couldn’t care less about some of the mechanics of your dreams, but they could be a tool.”

  I digest her little speech, flavored with compassion, understanding, and so much wisdom—the kind only Frankie can give.

  “So what do you think I should do?”

  “You can open portals, Jude.” Our eyes connect, hers shining with the idea that formulates in her brain. “Use this.”

  I straighten. She’s right. And I can link with Kane no matter where he is. Maybe together—with me on the inside and him on the out—we can find Rylin.

  “Okay,” I whisper.

  Frankie’s mouth tips into a satisfied little grin. But there’s one thing I need to do first:

  Talk to a certain little hybrid.

  Twenty-four

  I find Adam sitting on his rock, one leg propped up, his arms draped together around his knee. He offers me that lazy smile the minute he sees me.

  “Hey.” He slides over to give me room. “You’ve decided to give the fly zone another look, huh?”

  “Yeah.” I plop down next to him. He flexes his wings and pulls them close. “And here you are… keeping my seat warm.”

  He grins. “I like it here. You’d think watching others fly would be torture, but it isn’t.” He faces the wide open area again. “It’s kind of peaceful.”

  I scan the trees above us. I can see his point. The sunlight brightens the dome, and today, I spot at least seven other Firebloods taking advantage of the aviary. They zip and twirl and dive in various places throughout the fly zone. Not one of them is fully flared, of course, but each one’s skin glows hot in different shades of fire orange as embers fly off their wings.

  “I didn’t realize this was a public place,” I say.

  “It isn’t. These are all trusted staff members who have been given a pass. The guests don’t have access.” He eyes me. “This place was built just for Anika.”

  I recognize our waitress from the other night perched on a tree branch with a guy. He’s a gorgeous Fireblood, blond and muscular and definitely charmingly confident based on the way he leans toward her, preening. Kind of like Kane, honestly. It’s clear she isn’t interested, which makes him preen even more. When she rolls her eyes and leaps off of the branch, he pouts for a minute. But he’s in hot pursuit in no time. I have to smile. Is that what we would have looked like if I’d had my wings? Probably not. Because, I’d be locked up like my brother. Or dead.

  “Where’s your boyfriend?”

  Adam’s voice draws me back to the rock.

  “Plotting a road trip.” I kick off my sandals and draw my knees up to my chest, letting my toes dangle over the edge of the rock. “Don’t tell your parents.”

  “Wow.” He lifts a brow. “You really trust me.”

  I look at him. He laughs, pulling up a knee to rest a limp wrist over it. Yep. He and his parents haven’t had a real conversation in years. I know what that looks like.

  “So where is he headed?”

  “I don’t trust you that much,” I answer blankly. He laughs again. It’s an easy laugh that matches his smile. I dive into the real reason I’m here. “Where’s your sister?”

  “Last I saw her, she was buzzing across the far wall over there,” he points. “I haven’t seen her in about ten minutes. It’s almost time for us to leave. She’s hiding.”

  “Oh.” I pause, gathering my thoughts. “So… I flooded my suite last night while I was sleeping.” I gauge his reaction—a swift turn of his head. Okay, he’s familiar. No harm done.

  “No kidding?”

  “No kidding. The water came right out of a dream and rose up at least six inches into my place, and Kane’s too. It was a real mess in there this morning.”

  “I see.” A gleam stabs at me. “And now you want to talk to Anika.”

  I shrug, real nonchalant. Like it’s no big deal whether I do or whether I don’t. Because honestly, I don’t really know Adam. I don’t know that he won’t take his sister and bolt. I don’t know if he’s forced to come here every day and babysit, or if he chooses to because he’s protective of his little sister. Needless to say, I’m at a real disadvantage here. So I step lightly.

  “Yeah. You know, since your mom said she did the same thing once.”

  “Did Mom also give you permission to talk to my sister?”

  And… we’re gonna go with protective.

  “Actually, she told me not to.”

  “Yep. That sounds about right.”

  I study him in my peripheral for a moment, testing his demeanor. He doesn’t move, except to lift his head and scan the aviary. I have a real bad feeling he might be planning his getaway.

  “What do you know about it?” I ask tentatively.

  He keeps silent. I chew on my lip. The other day when we met, he was so much friendlier. Forthcoming even. Today, he’s like a clam.

  “Your mom told you not to talk to me, didn’t she?”

  That lazy smile again. “Took you long enough to figure that out.”

  Unbelievable.

  “What is she hiding?” I ask. “I’m not going to hurt your sister or make her feel uncomfortable. I’m just trying to figure myself out, and I thought a conversation with her could help.” I sigh, deep and long. This blows.

  But Adam’s defenses prickle like a cactus. He’s not going to let me talk to Anika any more than Petra herself would. This is a waste of time. I drop my feet and poke my toes into my shoes.

  “Well, thanks for the talk, I guess.” I stand, but with one quick swipe of his fingers, he clutches my wrist, holding me in my spot.

  “Sit, Jude.”

  I stop, look down at him. He dips his head as he releases his grip, inviting me to take my vacated spot. Hopeful, I slide back up onto that rock.

  “Listen, Mom isn’t hiding anything. She’s just… weird about Anika. She wants to protect her from anything that might upset her. Or remind her of the fact that she used to dream.” He sighs, casting his eyes over the expanse of the dome. “Anika asks me about dreaming sometimes. But it’s not the same for me. I dream like a plain ol’ human.”

  I follow his gaze, see Anika’s fiery form fly through a stand of trees way at the back.

  “She was seven when it happened. She doesn’t remember much.”

  “You never know.”

  “I do know. She only did something like that a couple of times before my parents implanted a dream inhibitor right into her brain. That was four years ago. Trust me, you aren’t going to get the answers you’re seeking.”

  In his tone, I read his confidence. He’s so sure she won’t remember, and this is all I have to go on. It’s only been four years, but… she’s twelve. Four years is like a third of her life.

  Just then, a tiny, angelic frame lit with fire comes zipping over the tops of our heads. She swoops in close enough for us to feel the heat ripple off her wings, and darts away again.

  “Fifteen minutes, Ani!” Adam hollers through cupped hands. He grins. “I don’t know why I bother. It’s not like I can catch her.”

  I glance at his crumpled wings. Noticing, he flutters them awkwardly and draws them in closer to his body.

  “Do you really wish they had taken your wings when you were born?” I ask him.

  “They’re worthless. So yeah.”

  Worthless. The word sits with me, a lump in my gut.

  “I saw a Fireblood in the lab. Trying to camouflage his wings with a remote. Unsuccessfully,” I add. “But have you thought about asking if it might work for you?”

  “Yeah, right,” Adam laughs. “I’m not into self-electrocution.”

  “Oh.” Yeah, scratch that.

  “What about you?” A sharp curiosity takes over his voice. “Are you sorry they took them?�
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  “Undecided.” And it’s never been truer. “I mean, I didn’t think I was born with wings until you told me, so… you know.”

  “Yeah, I kind of got a scolding for that.”

  “Why?”

  “For meddling. My parents are trying to ‘break you in softly’ they said.” He quotes his words with his fingers. “Not too much information too quickly.”

  “Well, it’s too late for that,” I proffer. “I didn’t even know Firebloods existed three weeks ago. And now… I am one.”

  “Really?” His tone rises with skepticism. “Not a clue?”

  “Nope. Well, except I could hear music sometimes when I was a kid. Rylin McDowell’s mantra to be exact.”

  “Wow.” He scrunches his face. “Why not your own mantra?”

  “Because I can’t hear it when I’m camouflaged, and I was always camouflaged. And Rylin’s was kind of overbearing. It drowned mine out.”

  “Hmm…” He stares off. “What’s it like?”

  Confused, I swing my gaze toward him. “What’s what like?”

  “A mantra.”

  “You don’t have one of those either?” I lean away, surprised.

  “Like I said before, I’m all human, other than these decorative wings.” He flaps them again and leans toward me. “In another life, they might have gotten me into all the best parties though.”

  I laugh. He’s probably not wrong.

  “So mantras aren’t like wings then?” I prod. “A part of our DNA?”

  “Apparently not, since I don’t have one. Which is good for me, I guess.” He loads up on sarcasm, and clips his next statement off the end of his tongue. “The Musicar will never find me.”

  Regardless of his tone, I hear the disappointment. I get the feeling Adam would gladly give his left arm for the Musicar to find him.

  “So…” I tread lightly, revisiting the real reason I came. “If I can’t talk to Anika, can you answer a few questions?”

  “Like what?” He sounds wary.

  “Well, Joshua said she pulled a puppy out of a dream once. Through a portal.”

  “Yeah.” He half-laughs. “We got to keep it for a whole week.”

  “Do you know how she did it?”

  “That’s what you want to know?” He leans back, letting his foot slide of the rock. “Are you planning to go fishing for a live creature?”

  “No. I’m just curious about how these portals work. Like can I go through it and end up somewhere else?” Because boy would that be handy.

  “Anika never did.” His face is full of amusement. “She was just a thief, stealing people’s puppies and beachballs and stuff. We woke to a few butterflies once too.” He scratches at his head. “My parents said something about how they were glad she had to be grounded to use the portal, or we might have lost her.”

  “Grounded? What is that?”

  “Like, stuck in one place. You can’t be hopping around if you’re going to let things in. Something like that.”

  “Did she ever say how she did it? Like was she aware.”

  “I don’t know about that. What I do know is she told that puppy to come with her, and it did.”

  She told it to come. That’s a good piece of information to have.

  On the edge of the overhang, Anika lands with a graceful flutter—ballerina-like—and walks toward us. Her feathers flicker with low fire, her skin a deep orange. She plants her bright eyes of flame on me as she moves closer.

  “Hi, Jude. Where’s Kane?”

  “He’s… busy.”

  “Too bad. I was ready to race him and win again.”

  Feather-light, she leaps up onto the rock next to me and glides into a criss-crossed position, back straight, arms poised. She’s a wonder, and I can’t help but think that all of her years of living in her natural form have given her these mannerisms. She’s so precise in her almost fairy-like movements. A fiery fairy for sure, and so not hybrid-like.

  “Where are your wings?” she frowns. “Are they camouflaged?”

  “I don’t have wings,” I smile.

  “Why?”

  I glance at Adam for his approval before I answer. “My parents decided to have them removed when I was a baby.”

  “Oh.” A flicker of horror crosses her face. “That’s awful!”

  Okay… so she’s not a fan of the whole extraction of wings conversation.

  “Yours are beautiful.” I would love to touch them, but I hold my place, not sure that every Fireblood wants to be manhandled.

  “Thanks.”

  She spread them wide behind her—a vibrant, dusty color. Unlike Kane’s, they are not iridescent. Instead powder seems to float off in light waves and curl away from them and up into the air like smoldering embers. Fireblood wings are so fascinating, and once again, I work to push down the envious longing that starts to swell up in my belly.

  “Are you sad that you can’t fly?” She folds her wings behind her, glancing at her brother as if she feels bad for asking. Like this is a conversation she and Adam have hashed out before. I connect with Adam before I answer.

  “A little. But…” I pause with a smile. “I levitated once.”

  “Cool.” She grins and hops to her feet right up there on the rock so that I have to look up at her. “That’s one of my favorite things to do. You want to do it together?”

  I hesitate wondering if I’ve overstepped my boundaries by admitting what I’d done in Portland. I’ve done it one time, and in all honesty, I’m not sure I can take credit. Rylin had a lot to do with getting me up there. Can I even do it on my own?

  A thrill of excitement followed by a chill of fear consumes me one after the other. This time, it will be all me. I sit still, staring up at the tall ceiling of the aviary, but Anika has already leaped to the ground. She clutches my hand and drags me to my feet.

  “I’m not sure about this,” I tell her.

  “It’s okay. It’s not hard. And if we link, it will be easier.”

  Yep. That’s what Rylin said too. It’s why I fell—because I wouldn’t link with him, and my fear dangles this in front of my face again. But now, Anika has hold of my hands. I look back at Adam and his wistful expression.

  “No fear.” He gives the air a little punch and leans back with a crooked smile and not an ounce of bitterness. Not in his voice or his expression.

  My mantra hums faithfully in my own mind’s background. It takes nothing to crank up its volume when I call to it. In the distance, I hear a new song—a tinkling thing full of innocence and laughter. Anika. I grow still and just listen… and it’s beautiful.

  Cautiously, I give her mantra a mental tug. It collides with my own, fresh and light—the mantra of a young girl who has never known the harshness and evil and ugliness of a world that exists outside these walls. I can’t help but to think this must be the closest to purity I’ve ever come. I scoop up her song, entangle it with mine. It never ceases to amaze me how incredibly magnificent each link is. Different. Defined by relationships. By love, devotion, family, friendship. Truly astounding.

  “Ready?”

  Anika enters my head, Jezik probing my mind. She flutters her wings, bouncing on her feet to get the momentum going, but her wings settle as quickly as they started, and she rises, strong and powerful on the melody of her song. Breaking free from my hands, she floats up and out to hover as still as a statue at least twenty feet above the cavernous depths below.

  For a split second, I can’t move, and several thoughts rush through my head. I’m most terrified that I won’t be able to do it. Because more than anything else, I don’t want to be a failure at it. Not when I’m trying so hard to figure out how to be a Fireblood—how to take control of this life, my dreams, my identity. I can’t fail.

  Secondary to this fear? Well, it’s a long way down if I fall.

  “Jude, the view looks pretty good from up here.”

  I look up, Anika waves, presses her mantra at me with more force. It jabs, a tiny punch to my lungs
. Okay. What did I say to Frankie just today? Optimists. Let’s be optimists.

  Right before I make my mind up to step off the ledge, another voice enters my head—the one voice that is the champion of every other.

  “What are you waiting for?”

  The sound, the words, the gentle challenge behind it… it rushes in full of passion and heat and a lifetime of trust and sweeps me up. For a split second, I’m positive I’ve left the ground already. Kane reaches me, his eyes lingering and full of longing to share this moment with me.

  I hold still, one foot balanced on the edge of the precipice, as his mantra, familiar and strong, joins the symphony inside my head. His wings, framing his shoulders in their black iridescence, vanish. And right where he stands, his feet let go of the ground. He rises through the air, his song growing in strength. He passes over me, close enough for me to reach out and touch his foot if I want to, before he glides up and joins Anika midair. She grins at him, and together, they peer down at me, waiting.

  “The mantra is everything, Jude. Focus.”

  The words penetrate, defying our physical distance. They’re so close. A part of me. And with him here, pushing me, encouraging me, guiding me, my fear just lets go. I push out everything else and feel my song. It scoops me up like a warm pair of arms, and I don’t resist. I don’t give in to any doubts taunting me. I glide up and up, and I’m… flying.

  Hanging in the air, face to face with Kane, I feel complete abandonment–like I’ve finally found my treasure. Like I can do anything. My smile transforms into glorious laughter; Anika beams, and it’s sweet, but Kane is who matters most. He looks at me like I’m a miracle, and you know, I feel like one. In one swift movement, he tugs me closer, right into his kiss. His wings unfurl and fold up around us, and we vanish into a curtain of feathers.

  One beat, and he launches upward with me in is arms. And my heart is full.