The Cowboy's Marriage Mistake

by Jessie Gussman

  Cord hit the lights, just the ones over the stalls, and she walked down the narrow aisle. Bill and Sadie both had their heads over the gates at the end of their stalls. Sadie nickered low.

  “Hey, sweetie,” Rosie said.

  “I bet you guys just about gave up on me,” Cord said, grabbing a pitchfork.

  “You want me to get them some water?”

  Cord paused, looking at her like he wasn’t sure if she might break. “I’ll do it.”

  She smiled, not that she felt like it but just to let him know that she was okay. Maybe not okay, but going to be okay. She held her hand out for the pitchfork. “I promise I’m not going off the deep end and going on a rampage with this.”

  Cord’s teeth flashed. “It’s uncanny the way you’re able to read my mind.”

  She rolled her eyes and grabbed the pitchfork. He let it go, walking over to the hose and grabbing it, while she went to the round bale in the corner and started forking hay to carry to the horses.

  They worked for a while in silence, and she was finished when Cord spoke while rolling up the hose. “You know Sadie and Bill have been the one constant in our lives. Since we got them when we were still in high school, so many things have changed, but they’ve always been here. Always need feed, always need water, always need attention. Training them, grooming them, working with them. No matter what else has been happening, they were here.”

  Rosie leaned the pitchfork against the wall and watched the horses as they ripped some hay out of the bunch and chewed it, their eyes patient and wise. “They’ve been good for you. And you’ve loved them. Thanks for including me with them.”

  Cord didn’t hesitate. “I wouldn’t have been able to do it without you. You’re the one who did all the research. I probably would’ve ruined them if I’d tried to train them myself, which is what I was going to do before you helped me.”

  Rosie didn’t say anything, shoving her hands in her pockets and watching the horses. He was right, really. She had helped him. It wasn’t like she’d been along for a free ride. Although he’d done the hard work. Hard work being the daily grind, day after day after day, feeding, watering, training consistently. Anyone could do it for a day. Maybe even a week. Taking care of an animal was work every day, whether one felt like it or not.

  “Didn’t you just say that’s what friends are for?” She didn’t feel much like smiling, not really, except with Cord she really couldn’t help it.

  “I think that’s what we agreed on.”

  He’d already been in the stalls while waiting for the water buckets to fill and checked the horses’ hooves, so they stood for just a bit longer, watching the big animals eat. There was something comforting and relaxing about the munching sound of hay being chewed.

  Rosie could’ve stood there all night, but she was tired and had started to sway on her feet.

  Whether Cord noticed, whether he was just tired too, she didn’t know. But he said, “Come on,” and held out his hand.

  She didn’t have to look at it for very long before she took it. It wasn’t a hard choice.

  ROSIE FELT LIKE HER head barely touched the pillow before she heard noises in the kitchen and blinked her eyes to bright sunlight streaming in through the window of Cord’s spare bedroom. She was tired and stiff and wanted to pull the covers over her eyes and go back to sleep, but she rolled out of bed anyway.

  It wasn’t until she was standing beside the bed that she remembered that Cord had given her a pair of jogging pants and an old T-shirt to wear. They hung on her. Her feet were completely covered, and she stood on the pant legs. But she didn’t have anything else to change into.

  Female voices came through the closed door. Cord’s home was a single-story, two-bedroom rancher, and the voices sounded like they were coming from the living room and kitchen. She couldn’t recognize them, but she assumed it was Lark and Charlie.

  To her surprise, she had fallen right to sleep last night, and she hadn’t had time to think about anything. She had no idea what she was going to do. And she probably would have to talk about it if she went out, which she didn’t want to do, but she wasn’t going to hide in the bedroom all day. Plus, they might have clothes.

  On that thought, she opened the door and walked out.

  Cord’s room was directly across the hall from hers. His door was shut. The single bathroom in the house was between the two doors. After a quick stop there, she walked out to the living room.

  Cord stood leaning against the counter, holding a steaming cup. Probably coffee. She could smell it. His youngest sister, Charlie, had her arms crossed and was in the middle of a soft tirade. Lark had her hands shoved in her pockets and leaned against the wall, listening.

  Cord looked up as he was lifting his coffee cup to his mouth and froze when he saw Rosie. Charlie saw his change of expression and quit talking, and both blond heads swiveled to look at her.

  She met Cord’s eyes across the room. The eyes of her friend, right? Except the stirring in her stomach and the tingling at the end of her fingers didn’t really say friend. And she’d never really noticed the width of his chest before. Or his solid jaw. Or the blue-green depths of his eyes as he stared at her.

  She tried to shove the jumbled mass of feelings in her chest out of the way and moved her gaze to Charlie and Lark.

  She gave a sheepish smile. “I slept a little longer than I was expecting.”

  Lark pulled her hands out of her jean pockets and strode toward her. Lark had been a few years younger than her in school, although Cord had been Rosie’s best friend all through school, and they’d spent a lot of time together. Of course, she knew Lark. And to know Lark was to love her.

  “I’m so sorry,” Lark said as she wrapped her arms around Rosie and drew her into an orange-scented hug. “I can’t believe the library is gone. I know how much your books meant to you and how hard you worked to start it.”

  It might’ve seemed a little funny that Lark didn’t even mention her house. But Lark knew what was important to Rosie. Her books. Providing a place for the kids in Sweet Water to read. A place for them to hang out. Somewhere warm where they could get snacks in the winter and relax in the summer. The shelves of books just made it all better.

  Lark’s short curly hair framed her face and bounced in playful ways that suited her bubbly personality as she drew back. “Charlie and I brought some clothes. I brought my favorite skirt and my best pair of boots. And Charlie’s giving you her white button-down blouse that she never lets me borrow.”

  Charlie, who was the youngest of Cord’s siblings and still in school, maybe a senior, came over and put her arm around Rosie. Not as outgoing and friendly as Lark, Charlie was still sweet, and there was nothing but concern on her face.

  “I would’ve brought you my favorite pair of boots, but my feet are three sizes bigger than Lark’s. And Cord told us that Lark’s size was the same as yours.” She slanted a glance at Cord. “I would think it’s weird that my brother knows your shoe size, but considering how much time you two have spent together over the years, it’s probably to be expected.” Her lips quirked in a smile before she bit her lip. “I’m sorry about the library and your home as well.”

  Rosie’s nose tingled, and the back of her throat closed. “You guys really didn’t have to bring me anything. But I truly appreciate it.”

  She held her arms out from her sides, Cord’s too-big clothes hanging from her. “This is all I have other than the outfit I was wearing last night.” Hope blossomed in her chest. “Unless... Unless you guys went through town and maybe it’s not as bad as I remember it being?” She knew her face probably had a puppy-dog hopeful expression on it, but that disappeared pretty fast.

  Because both girls were shaking their heads.

  Lark took her hand. “We stopped. Mom had said it was a total loss, but we thought surely we could root through and find something or maybe some things.” Lark’s hand squeezed hers, and her eyes held compassion. “There is literally nothing left.” />
  “We got out of the car and walked through, just in case.” Charlie bit her lip.

  After seeing the fire last night, this was exactly what Rosie expected. But she’d hoped for better news. Her chest felt like it was filled with mud, and she blinked several times.

  Lark threw a worried glance at Cord. He’d already set his coffee cup on the counter and started walking over.

  He nodded his head at the bags sitting by the door. There must’ve been ten of them. “If you want to see if there’s something in those bags that fits you, I’ll take you into town and you can look for yourself.”

  Rosie shook her head slowly. Maybe she was crazy, but she didn’t want to see it. Although there was a part of her that was curious. Could she find something that everyone else had missed? Was there truly nothing left?

  Maybe she should take him up on it.

  “Unless you need us, we weren’t going to stay.” Lark’s hair waved around her face as she tightened her hold on Rosie and squeezed her.

  The comfort felt good. Rosie had no idea what she was going to do. Still had no idea. Maybe it was normal. Maybe she wasn’t expected to know exactly what to do the morning after a catastrophe like this.

  “Thank you so much for bringing clothes over. I truly appreciate it.” She knew she wasn’t really acting like it. “I’m sorry I’m not the greatest person to talk to today.”

  Lark waved her hand in the air, dismissing Rosie’s concern. “We didn’t come to talk. In fact, we didn’t expect to even see you. Although if you need us, we’re here.”

  “I know. Thank you.”

  Lark and Charlie stayed for a few more minutes before they bid farewell to their brother, saying that their mother had driven to Rockerton for a meeting and might stop in later, and they headed out.

  Rosie watched them go, noting how they laughed with Cord and how he teased them. Lark had been in the library a good bit. Rumors had swirled about her and the man she worked for, Jeb. Romantic rumors. But Rosie had never heard anything from Lark herself, and so she found them hard to believe.

  Twice, Jeb himself had come in. He’d been very polite but quiet. She might even say he was shy. He borrowed her two lone books on protein and feed rations for dairy cattle.

  Rosie blew out a breath. Never again. Not only would Jeb not be in the library again, no one would ever borrow a book from the Sweet Water library again.

  The thought choked her up. But then she thought, was that true? Was she not going to rebuild?

  Of course, she wasn’t. There was no money.

  Cord closed the door and walked back across the floor. He stopped in front of her. “You’re looking a little shell-shocked.”

  She lifted her shoulder slightly. “I’m sure you mean that in the best way possible.” She couldn’t sit around and mope. And she had to find her sense of humor. In her experience, it was the best way to deal with stuff like this. Not that she’d ever been through stuff like this.

  Although if she had to go through something like this, Cord would be the person she’d want to go through it with.

  Cord grinned. “Of course.” He moved close enough to touch her and put a hand on her shoulder.

  It was just the comforting touch of a friend, of course. Only her crazy heart wanted it to be more.

  “I can’t delay my trip tomorrow. I need to deliver the sleds. But I’m here today, and if you need me for anything, I’m more than happy to help.”

  Maybe it was just her imagination, but it felt like his fingers moved lightly over her shoulder. Odd how a touch on her shoulder could make her chest warm.

  She moved away from his hand. She needed to remember he was engaged to her sister. Maybe she should talk to him about that, but it felt like she had enough to deal with right now.

  “I can’t believe how many clothes your sisters brought.” She looked over at the bags sitting by the door and wrapped both arms around her stomach. “Maybe I’ll carry those to my room and see if there’s something I can wear. I don’t really want to go look at the library. Maybe it’s a little like a funeral where I’d just rather remember it the way it used to be rather than the way it is. But I think I need to be an adult about this and face it. There might be something I can salvage from the ruins.”

  “That’s my girl.” Cord’s fingers found hers, tightening for a moment, and his eyes shone down. His teeth flashed, and her heart skipped. He moved just a little closer, and she felt herself leaning toward him before she realized what she was doing and tore her eyes away.

  It was going to be hard to give him up and get over him if she was living in his house. She needed to figure something else out, and fast.

  Definitely a good night’s sleep had helped her feel like she could face this. Not that she didn’t still feel devastated.

  Cord helped her carry the bags to her room before he went out to check the stock and start the pickup.

  Rosie discovered that what Lark and Charlie had given her by the way of clothes actually ended up being more than she had owned before the fire. Her heart swelled with gratitude.

  Cord was the same way. Always giving more.

  Most of the clothes were nicer than what she owned previously. She picked out an outfit that wasn’t too fancy.

  She had to admit looking good bolstered her spirits and gave her confidence. Cord would be beside her, and she could do this.

  Chapter 12

  MAYBE SHE DIDN’T WANT to do this.

  Rosie sat in Cord’s pickup, looking at the rubble of what used to be the library and her small apartment. Her stomach was a wet, jumbled blob of shredded paper, and her body refused to move.

  “You don’t have to do this,” Cord said beside her. “I can take you home.”

  She gave him a look, lifting her brow and pulling one lip back. “This is my home.”

  “Was.” His fingers rose from the steering wheel before gripping it again. “Don’t mean to rub it in or anything, but ‘was’ is definitely the operative word here.”

  He didn’t exactly smile, but his eyes crinkled. He wasn’t laughing at her, and he wasn’t making light of her problems; he was just offering companionship and conversation. She appreciated that.

  “You could be a little more respectful when you talk about my former home.”

  His eyes skimmed over the rubble. “Maybe you have a point there. Looks like a graveyard.”

  His words were apt. It was a graveyard. Maybe she was being dramatic, but it was the graveyard of her dreams.

  She lifted a shoulder. “I think you’re right in a way. Regardless, I know it’s only been a day, but you know I’m not getting the money to rebuild. I know it too.” She pursed her lips.

  “You can’t be sure about that.”

  She unbuckled her seatbelt with a click and let it snap back in the holder. Grabbing the door latch, she yanked it open. “I’m sure. But I think that’s going to be for the best.” She hopped out of his truck.

  He followed her out, meeting her at the front. The sidewalk was deserted, which wasn’t uncommon for Sweet Water in the middle of winter. Wind blew down, stirring the ashes, pulling smoke out of the embers.

  “How so?” he asked, his eyes on the ruins.

  Her eyes were fixed there too. Everyone was right. There was truly nothing left. A few walls, a charred bookcase or two, the mostly melted remains of her desk. Her bathtub and sink.

  But she was here, so she stepped off the sidewalk and looked over the wall that was only half standing. She didn’t even want to go in and look around. But she was here now. They bypassed the yellow tape around the half-burnt wall and stepped in.

  “I just mean I think it might be time for me to move on.” She kicked a pile of ash, uncovering a charred book.

  “MOVE ON IN WHAT WAY?” Cord asked, not liking the cramping of his stomach.

  She shrugged. “Library jobs are hard to find, but I’ll have more luck moving to a bigger city. Maybe Rockerton but probably Fargo.”

  Cord was thankful sh
e wasn’t looking at him, because he knew his eyes were probably wide and alarmed. He tried to stop the panicking of his insides.

  She had her hands shoved down in her coat pockets, and her shoulders hunched against the wind. Her hair was covered by a thick beanie, and her eyes drifted over the area where her apartment had been. A few large pieces remained, but the whole area looked gutted.

  It matched the way his stomach felt at the idea of losing Rosie.

  He knew what he could do to keep her from having to leave. He wasn’t surprised at the idea, because he thought of it last night while he was feeding Bill and Sadie. He thought he had time to think about it though. Or time for some other solution to present itself.

  Of course, he had the $1 billion inheritance; he’d almost made a big mistake with Rosalin over that, and it wasn’t sorted out yet. He still needed to talk to Rosalin.

  No, he wasn’t going that route again.

  But he did have something he could do. Rosie just needed to give them some time. She’d object if he told her about it, so he’d wait.

  “It’s pretty soon to make a decision.” He hoped he didn’t sound as desperate as he felt. “Why don’t you give it a few days, a week? A couple of weeks wouldn’t even be unheard of.”

  She looked up at the gray sky, her shoulders slumped. She closed her eyes. Finally, she opened them and looked straight at him. He felt that look clear to his toes.

  “I don’t want to be in limbo anymore. We both know what I was doing here with the library wasn’t something that could last.”

  He didn’t give her a chance to go on. “But you loved it. What does it matter if it didn’t pay a whole lot? Or that it wasn’t a job that was going to lead to a great promotion, or it wasn’t what some people consider a good job? You were doing a good thing, a necessary thing, here in Sweet Water. People need a library, and you provided it. A successful life isn’t necessarily one that makes a lot of money. At least not in my eyes.”