Love You...Never

by Francesca Penn

  Emiliano’s left arm continues to hold me while he removes his jeans with the right hand. He turns off my light with the remote. I wrap my legs around his waist when he lifts me. We move farther into the bed; he lies us down and pulls my blanket over us. His right-hand starts to caress my hair. I silently mourn the milestones we’ll never reach. We won’t celebrate an anniversary. I’ll never feel a surge of happiness when he proposes. He’ll never stare at me lovingly as I walk down the aisle. I don't see his eyes light up with joy because I’m pregnant.

  Sex. That’s all we’ll have because his heart belongs to some random woman who doesn’t want his love. There are a few things I can experience with him if he’s willing to cooperate, though.

  “Emiliano?”

  “Hmm?” I love how it feels to have his chest rumble under my ear.

  “This may sound crazy…”

  “It’s okay if you’re tired…”

  I giggle. “No, I’m up.” I run my hand over his erection. “And, so are you.”

  He moans and presses against my hand. I feel him shift in the bed. The lights come on in a dim glow. I wait for him to get comfortable; we’re lying on our sides facing each other.

  “What’s the crazy thing? Will I need lube?”

  I laugh at the unexpected question. “What’s with you and anal?” He laughs when I shake my head. “Don’t answer that. What I was going to say is all this skin-to-skin has me thinking…”

  “I’m clean, I get tested often, and I’m a stickler for safe sex.”

  “Okay, but…”

  “Are you on some form of birth control?”

  “Yes…” Emiliano has me on my back and is nestled between my legs before I can finish my thought. “What are you…ohhh!”

  He’s buried deep inside of me before I can finish my question. Damn, it’s good.

  “¡Dios Mio!” His moans make me wetter. He pulls back and thrusts a second time. All my cells celebrate and sing show tunes. “Ah. Better than good. It’s exceptional,” he moans again. “Perfect pussy.”

  Emiliano slightly shifts his trajectory and my body incinerated. Everything inside me tingled.

  “Tomás!” I yell from shock and pleasure. “Don’t move.”

  He freezes. “What’s wrong?”

  “That’s the spot,” I pant. “Feels so damn good.”

  His face breaks into a predatory grin. “Good to know.”

  Emiliano rocks his hips just enough to tease my spot continuously. Three hard strokes have me screaming at a volume that makes me happy I live alone. My body spasms and squeezes him tighter. I’ve never been so wet from cumming.

  “Yes, baby,” he moans in my ear. “I love making you cum.” He’s deeper now that my leg is on his shoulder. “I never knew how good this could be.” The way he touches and looks at me when he’s inside of me makes me feel as if I could have him beyond the minutes it takes for him to break me down to dust. His naughty words make me feel like I’m the best he’s ever had; like he’ll never find this with anyone else. “It’s so good I could move into it.”

  You could marry it. I push away my hope and jump back into the moment because no one has ever rocked my world the way he does. I want to stay in our perfect world a little longer. I need to remember the way his hair falls into his face, the simmer of his eyes, and the way his biceps turn into stone when he’s thrusting deep inside me.

  I need to remember for the lonely nights ahead. I want to try something while he’s relaxed.

  “Emiliano?

  “Yeah?” He looks at me with lust glazed eyes.

  “Truce?” His smile displays his perfect teeth.

  Emiliano flips us over, to put me on top. “Truce.” He laces his fingers into mine. “Now ride my dick as I taught you while I feast on your tits.”

  Happy that we could at least cease-fire, I grind him like it’s my job. His moans vibrate my nipples as he sucks and teases them. It feels so good; I feel my channel tightening, preparing for yet another orgasm. I whimper and throw my head back as I chase that high. His hot, open-mouth kisses all over my chest and neck help propel me back into the atmospheres. Big fingers dig into my ass cheeks, and my name is growled into my skin. His teeth sink into my shoulder. Emiliano’s jerking cock and the hot liquid shooting inside of me is all the motivation I need. I feel the tremors deep inside of me intensify and spread. My nails bite into his shoulders. My climax steals my breath, and I can only whisper his name.

  “Tomás,” I sigh again as I crash back down to earth.

  This is the part when one of us usually disappears. I’m scared to find out his intentions. He leans over and plucks the box of tissues from the nightstand. I disengage and fall on my back. I’m elated when he pulls me into the spooning position.

  I’m certain he is attempting to be a gentleman when he begins to wipe up his cum from my entrance, but his hand is rubbing my clit during clean up and the sensitivity of my flesh has me trembling from another orgasm as he laughs into my hair.

  Chapter 17

  Emiliano

  I barrel my way towards Amy’s house, running at top speed to ensure total burn out. Despite being up late because I was taking a joyride between Caris’ thighs, I’m full of energy. Too much energy. I need to burn it all before I give myself a reason to go back. I stop at the tree in front of her house and walk in a small circle with my hands on my head until the gulping breaths stop.

  “What the hell?” Connor puffs between gasps once he’s in earshot. “You’re trying to kill me,” he huffs with his hand on his knees.

  “Too fast?” My joke gets me treated to a death glare.

  I grab our waters near my car. Handing him his bottle, I take a sip out of mine.

  “Why can’t you talk things out like a normal person?” Connor manages after a sip.

  “What?”

  “You obviously have something on your mind.”

  “You have been paying attention to me all these years. I’m flattered,” I joke with my best girly blinks.

  “Shut up. What did you do?”

  “I couldn’t sleep last night…”

  “And you hit Caris up for a booty call.”

  I frown at Connor. “I’m not psychic. I was a single guy before I was married.”

  “She sends me her address. I get there, and she’s bitching about the way I parked…”

  “The way you parked?”

  “Yeah. I parked in the middle.”

  “Why didn’t you just pick a side?”

  “Oh, man. You, too? Why does that matter at 2 AM?”

  “You’re right. Continue.”

  We start walking towards the café just outside his neighborhood. “Anyway, I picked her up because I was over the parking thing. We’re having light banter and clothes begin coming off…”

  “Wait. She didn’t do anything crazy or ultra-freaky, did she? If she did, don’t tell me. I still have to look at her with a straight face for a week.”

  “It was weird, but not that kind of weird. Just listen. I’m standing off to the side of her bed with my shirt off. I remove her robe. She’s butt-naked. I think it’s about to jump off, but she hugs me.”

  “Hugs you? As in the embrace people usually do fully clothed with loved ones they haven’t seen in a while?”

  “Yep. That’s the one. It wasn’t my imagination because she stayed like that long enough for me to decide to hug her back. She sighed like she was relieved I returned the hug. It felt good to hug her, but we stayed like that for a while. I’m thinking game over. I go into post-coital cuddle mode. You know, lie down, pull the covers up, and squeeze her like hugging her is the only thing I ever wanted to do.” We sit in an empty booth and grab the waiting menus. “I committed to my role. I mean I’m rubbing her hair and everything, hard dick be damned.”

  Connor is laughing at my story like I’m George Lopez. “Then, she says my name all tentative and shit. You know, the I-have-something-to-say-but-I-don’t-know-if-you’ll-like-it tone. She warned i
t might sound weird. So, I’m like uh-oh, and I tell her it is okay if she’s tired and wants to go to sleep. Then she’s all, ‘nope that’s not it.’ Then she mentions skin-to-skin. I jumped her before she could finish her sentence.”

  “You went at it bare? Without protection? What if she gets preg-,” Connor stops himself with a headshake. “Never mind. You wouldn’t care because you’re in love with her.” I shrug and nod to confirm his theory. “It feels amazing, doesn’t it?”

  My eyes roll back. “Habit forming.” We order our food before I continue. “So, then I was like, okay business as usual, but she calls me Emiliano.”

  “So?”

  “She always calls me Tomás when things are…heated. Anyway, I was right; she was trying to get my attention. I acknowledged her, and she called ‘truce.’”

  We lean back and allow the server to set our plates in front of us.

  “‘Truce?’ That’s a good thing. It all sounds good. Why the marathon running.”

  “My hopes are up, and the last time they were up, they crumbled to a terrifying death.”

  “Well, what did she say this morning?”

  I check my phone. “Nothing so far.”

  Connor shakes his head then throws it back with irritation. “My god, man! You did not have that kind of breakthrough just to leave before she woke up.”

  “What? I texted her that I had an early morning run with you.”

  “Which you didn’t, until you showed up an hour ago banging on the door like a crazy person. I was so comfortable, too. Amy’s ass was nestled against me just right...” His green eyes got a far off look in them.

  “I’m buying you breakfast. That has to count for something.”

  “Hmm, let’s see? Morning sex with my extra hot wife or breakfast with my relationship-challenged friend? Mmm, that’s a tough decision.” I’m not amused by his sarcasm. “If you want my advice, I’d say buy some breakfast and go back. Make her feel less like a late-night booty call if you want her to be around forever. It’s still extra early. She may still be in bed.”

  “But, wait. I should feel hopeful, right? Like hopeful enough to jump past the other woman plan and straight to let’s-talk-about-this. Right?”

  “Yes. You could go have that talk now.”

  My heart begins pounding faster than it did while I was running. “No, I’m formulating a plan. I want her to focus on the relaunch next week. Then, we’ll talk. In the meantime, I’ll take your advice.”

  I slap money on the table.

  “And pick one fucking side of the driveway, dude.”

  Caris

  That was stupid of me. I revealed too much. All the hugging and truce calling must have scared him off. I’m still in bed staring at the ceiling trying my best not to cry. I don’t need to get up to know he’s not here. I can feel it. It was not the best idea to get my hopes up. We called a truce and nothing else. Emiliano did not profess his feelings for me or tell me he feels stupid for casting me aside in high school. No, he’d only given me incredible sex and agreed to the truce. That’s all.

  I roll onto my side and stare at the spot where he’d fallen asleep. It’s also stupid; it’s not like it will bring him back. He probably ran off the moment I’d fallen asleep. I’d given him what he’d wanted. “WYD” doesn’t mean I can’t stop thinking about you. Maybe I should come clean. Well, not completely. What crazy ass person still carries a torch for someone after twelve years? I could say the adult version of me is starting to have feelings beyond sex for him. Yeah, that’s totally plausible. Right?

  I hop out of bed because my bladder does not allow me to mope in peace. I brush my teeth after I pee and wash my hands, I can’t go back to sleep with my bed smelling like Emiliano. We should have met at a hotel. I check my phone.

  Satan: I had an early run scheduled with Connor.

  At least he left some sort of note. I guess. I stare at my phone. I want to pick a fight. I want to beg him to come back. My fingers are frozen; I don’t do either. Maybe I should leave it on read. Will he think I’m being salty AF? I’m donning a robe meant for coverage when my doorbell rings. I open the doorbell app on my phone but can only see white plastic. I assume Cher is outside, but I made her a key after all of her recent break-ins, and she would not be awake and anywhere at 7:20 AM.

  My heart leaps when I see a familiar silhouette. I crack the door open to a smiling Emiliano. I can’t be mad at a man who left for a run and comes back with food promptly after the run. Right?

  “Good morning. Did you get my text? I didn’t want to wake you that early.”

  “I was reading it when I heard the doorbell.” I step back to allow him entry. I just totally folded. He looks damn good sweaty.

  Emiliano gives me the bag while he kicks off his shoes. “Where is the laundry room?”

  “Down the hall to the right.” He wanders off and disappears into my laundry room. I’m stymied. I’m still at the door holding a bag of food when he reappears completely nude.

  He walks toward me with a wicked smile. He’s all naked, sweaty, and partially aroused male. I wonder if he’s a mirage until he grabs my hand.

  “Shower first. Breakfast after.”

  My journey through my house to my bedroom is a blur because I’m hyper-focused on our interlocked fingers. He’s holding my hand. I’m a grown-ass adult, and it’s taking all my woman power not to squeal like a teenaged girl. Maybe teen Caris would not have been able to handle all of this.

  “Towels?” His question pulls me out of my stupor.

  “Uh. Towels. Right,” I say as I put the food on my dresser. “Go ahead. I’ll catch up.” I hold my breath as he nods and disappears into the bathroom. I exhale when I hear him step under the running shower.

  I snatch up my phone and start typing.

  Caris: Very Sweaty Emiliano just showed up. He went into my laundry room and came out as Very Naked Emiliano. Now, Very Wet Emiliano is waiting for me in my shower. *swoon*

  Cher: Then why is Very Stupid Caris texting me? Do you think I’d be texting you if I had a hot cup of Abuelita in my shower? NOPE.

  Caris: I get your point.

  Cher: I want details later. BYE!

  I picked out some towels and placed them on the rack next to the shower. I drop the robe and quickly pin up my hair – I don’t want to get it wet, but I don’t want to pull on a shower cap – before grabbing the washcloths and joining him. I know we’ve had sex a few times, and I know I’ve just seen him naked, but seeing him naked with shampoo and water cascading down his body as he rinses his hair is absolutely next level.

  I stand there mesmerized by him. He’s holding his head back and running his fingers through his hair as he checks for more shampoo. His eyes are closed, and those perfect lips are slightly pursed as he concentrates. I’m jealous of the soap sliding along the planes of his abs. I shake off my nerves and join the party.

  After squeezing soap in my hand, I lather up and rub it on his abs heading toward his chest.

  “Mmm…” He grins. “You decided to join me.” Emiliano pushes the water out of his face and smiles down at me. His brown eyes radiate some of the heat they used to have in high school. He should not be allowed to be this sexy.

  “Let’s wash those pits. They’re probably the worst.” His laugh rumbles through the shower.

  “No. I have an excellent deodorant, and I washed them first. Do my back.” I get a wonderful view of his ass when he turns.

  I grumble to myself my lack of understanding about men having perfect asses. What are they doing with them?

  “Huh?”

  “Your ass is amazing,” I amend with a pat. I add some soap to the cloth and start on his back.

  “Your ass is spectacular.”

  I’m warm all over. I know I am attractive enough for him to desire me sexually, but I’ve never considered he is as amazed by my body as I am with his. I do my best to look good, but I’m not on his level of commitment by a long shot. I’m currently having waffle cravin
gs if – I’m being honest.

  I don’t respond. Instead, I focus on my task. Eventually, I drop the towel and use my palms again. He hums his satisfaction as if he’s being massaged. I’m content with how my fingers glide over his damp skin with the slick soap. I’m having so much fun with his soapy skin and hard muscle combo that I allow my fingers to glide down his sides and interlock around his waist. I close my eyes when my cheek takes up residence against his back.

  I’m not fully aware of what I’m doing until Emiliano speaks, “You know. I would have never taken you for a hugger.”

  My eyes pop open. I’m mortified. The realization that I am in fact hugging him again makes me wish I was as dissolvable as the soap disappearing down the drain. What the hell! Elmyra might possess me; that’s the only explanation I have how for this.

  “I…uh, am not,” I protest as I remove myself from him. My conviction is not where it needs to be. “I fell asleep.” Emiliano’s laughter echoes in the shower.

  I turn to slink off, but his strong arm bands around my waist and pulls me until my back adheres to his chest. His hard cock presses into my ass. “Well, let me wake you up.”

  He pushes my head aside like he’s a vampire. The slide of his lips, the light nips of his teeth, and tease of the tip of his tongue against the sensitive skin of my neck have me forgetting the hugging incident. My breath hitches when his big hands cup my breasts and squeeze until his thumbs are teasing my nipples. The heat from his body and the warmth of the shower spray have me wishing he’d put me out of my misery and take me against the wall.

  Emiliano, however, was born to torture me. He rarely does anything the way I expect. “I’m going to bathe you now.” His husky announcement makes my insides clench with anticipation.

  Still, behind me, he grabs the soap and squeezes a good amount into his hands. They are on me after he works them into a good lather, and damn, I wish he was a permanent fixture in my shower. I sigh, and my head falls forward when he’s kneading my neck and shoulders. I moan when his soapy hands cover my breasts, his palms gliding over my nipples most deliciously.