Child on His Doorstep

by Lee Tobin McClain

  He stood and came over to them and rubbed circles on Mikey’s back, and the words burst out of his mouth: “Let’s do it together.”

  She let out a little sigh. “Corbin.”

  “What?” He was standing close enough to hear her breathing and to smell the flowery fragrance of her shampoo.

  “It just seems a little too...domestic, or something,” she said.

  He thought about that. “Lunch seemed domestic, too,” he said, gesturing to the food-laden table. “Nothing wrong with domestic.”

  She scrunched her nose. “You sure about that?”

  “No,” he admitted. “But I know it’s more fun to do stuff with someone else than to always do everything alone.” Which sounded totally pathetic. He wished he could take back the words. “I’m just not used to it,” he added, which wasn’t much better.

  “I’m not, either,” she said softly.

  “Do you like it as much as I do?” He was looking down at her, studying her eyes, her face. She looked...vulnerable.

  And then he could have kicked himself. What was he doing? He wasn’t going to get close with someone unreliable, an alcoholic.

  Her eyes darkened. “Corbin...what are you doing?”

  It was an echo of his own question to himself. How could he say that he felt like there was a magnet in her, drawing her to him, very much against his better judgment? Mikey rested against her shoulder, picking a little bit at the sleeve of her shirt, his eyes drooping shut. Corbin stepped a few inches closer to brush aside Mikey’s hair.

  And to breathe in Samantha’s perfume, a note of muskiness beneath the floral.

  Their eyes met, and it definitely felt like a magnet. The sunlight slanted golden rays over her hair as she ducked her head to brush her lips across Mikey’s forehead. The neck of her shirt gaped, showing her delicate throat. Barely aware of what he was doing, he reached out to draw her closer.

  When his hands made contact with her upper arms, she let out a little sigh and looked up at him again. Her eyes, up this close, were stunning: huge and gray-green and vulnerable. His mouth went dry.

  “Mama,” Mikey mumbled, then lifted his head. “Mama at church.”

  Corbin came back to himself as he realized that Mikey was still awake. He stilled his arms and frowned. “You mean Samantha? She wasn’t at church.”

  “Mama at church,” Mikey insisted. “Told me to be a good boy.”

  “You mean your...your real mama?” he asked.

  Mikey nodded, then rubbed his eyes and lay his head back down against Samantha’s shoulder.

  Samantha took a giant step back. “I think it’s time for Mikey to go to bed.” She held up a hand. “Don’t bother. I’d rather do it myself.”

  That stung, but Corbin was grateful, too. It would give his hormones the chance to calm down. Give him a chance to think better of his extreme desire to kiss her.

  As she hurried out the kitchen door and up the stairs, Corbin puzzled over Mikey’s words.

  Had Cheryl come to church to see Mikey? What had she wanted? What condition had she been in? Why would she do it secretly rather than openly?

  And why had Samantha acted so weird about it?

  Chapter Seven

  On Monday morning, Samantha climbed out of Corbin’s car at the Rescue Haven barn. She opened the back door and unbuckled Mikey from his car seat.

  “I can lift him out,” rumbled Corbin’s deep voice behind her.

  Awareness skittered up and down Samantha’s spine. They hadn’t cleared the air over what had happened yesterday, Mikey’s words about seeing his mother, Corbin’s anger that she was missing from church, her own erratic behavior after Jack had confronted her in the church nursery. This morning, though, she’d awakened with the desire to get something done. Mikey had seemed a little restless at breakfast, so they hitched a ride with Corbin to Rescue Haven. He was to pick them up on his way back from the university this afternoon.

  Samantha knew her own anxiety had to do with the way Corbin had looked at her. He’d been intense, almost flirtatious. She’d thought he might be going to kiss her. She’d wanted him to kiss her.

  But Mikey’s innocent words had thrown cold water onto that romantic scenario. After she’d put Mikey down for his nap, she’d gone out for a walk and called Cheryl.

  “Did you come to the church today?” she had demanded, and Cheryl, after a long pause, had admitted that she had.

  “It’s hard, that’s all,” the older woman had said. “I know it’s best for Mikey, but he’s my baby boy and I miss him so much.”

  The pain in Cheryl’s voice had been real. Samantha’s heart broke for her. Cheryl had messed up motherhood badly as a young woman, and admitted freely that she and Paul hadn’t been good parents to Corbin. Now, she had a late in life baby and doted on him, but she also had a hard time staying sober. And what energy she had needed to go to her dying husband.

  Cheryl’s life was a mess, and Samantha couldn’t help having compassion for her. Especially since Cheryl was trying so hard to do the right thing, trying harder than she ever had in her life from the looks of things.

  Corbin carried Mikey into the barn where Samantha had arranged to meet Gabby and her daughter. The two women were hoping that the babies would entertain each other long enough for Gabby and Samantha to talk over the float that Samantha was going to make for the parade.

  Inside the barn, the dogs barked their greetings from their crates that lined one wall. Mikey was already comfortable enough to struggle out of Corbin’s arms and run over to visit the dogs. He clapped his hands in front of one crate, riling up the little brown-and-white mutt inside. Then he saw Boomer, the big longhaired black dog, and gave a little jump of excitement. He squatted down and poked his finger into the crate and let the dog lick his face through the bars.

  “Looks like he’s going to be a dog lover,” Samantha said. “He’s not showing any fear.”

  “He sure seems to like Boomer,” Corbin said. “For that matter, I like Boomer, too. If I were going to get a dog...”

  Samantha glanced over at him and leaned closer to keep her voice low. “Don’t you think Mikey would benefit from having a puppy?”

  “He might benefit from it, but I wouldn’t,” Corbin said. “I can barely wrap my mind around the idea of having a child to take care of. Adding in a puppy might put me over the top.”

  “You’re kidding, right?” Samantha asked. “You’re doing a terrific job.”

  “You really think so?” Corbin put his hands on his hips and smiled. “I appreciate that, coming from you. I’m really learning as I go with this.”

  “So, you admit that it would be great to get Mikey a dog,” Samantha said.

  Corbin held up his hands like stop signs. “Wait a minute, that’s not what I said!” he protested. “You can’t seriously think that would be a good idea for me and Mikey at this time.”

  “Sometimes two are easier than one,” she said. “A dog would keep Mikey entertained, and he would grow up learning about and knowing about animals.”

  Corbin shook his head back and forth, a slight smile softening his refusal. “Seriously, I don’t think I could handle it. I know my limits.”

  “You thought you couldn’t handle a child, but you are,” she said.

  “Why are you so adamant about me getting a dog?” he asked. “Some of the care of it would fall on you, you know.”

  She wrinkled her nose. “Truth is, I always wanted a dog when I was growing up. Mom was like you. She didn’t think she could handle it on top of everything else she had to do, and she was probably right. And I would always say that I would help, but she didn’t believe me. And that was probably right, too.”

  “What was probably right?” Gabby walked into the barn holding two-year-old Izzy by the hand.

  “I’m still trying to get Corbin to let Mikey have a dog,
” Samantha said.

  “And I’m ignoring her, because I need to get to the university,” Corbin said. “Gabby, please talk some sense into Samantha. Let her know I couldn’t handle a dog, too.”

  As Corbin hurried out the barn door, Gabby turned to Samantha, one eyebrow raised. “You two are arguing like a married couple,” she said.

  Heat suffused Samantha’s face. “Not hardly,” she said. “If Corbin doesn’t want to get a dog for Mikey, then he shouldn’t get one.”

  “Get dog!” Mikey said.

  He had approached them without Samantha having realized it. “Oh, no,” she whispered to Gabby, and then tried to redirect Mikey’s attention. “Look, Mikey, it’s baby Izzy,” she said.

  “Want dog,” Mikey said. “That one.” He pointed at Boomer.

  “Come on over here,” Gabby said. “Look, Izzy brought her cars and trucks to play with.” She led the way to a part of the barn where a square play area was sectioned off with knee-high walls. She plunked Izzy down into the little penned-off area, and Samantha swung Mikey in, too. When Gabby dumped a container of plastic cars and trucks inside, the toddlers gleefully grabbed and banged them.

  “We better get done as much as we can while they’re interested in each other and the toys,” Gabby said. “It won’t last long.”

  “Good idea.” Samantha followed Gabby to a bench near the play area. “I just wanted to get a few ideas about the float that I’m going to make for you all,” she said. “I feel like it’s important to get this right.”

  “And you won’t have an easy judge,” Gabby said. “Mrs. Markowski is particular.”

  “I got that impression,” Samantha said. She showed Gabby the drawings she’d made and they talked through some of the techniques that could bring the float to life, as well as budgets and supplies.

  Surprisingly, the babies played well together, and after they’d hammered out the details of the float, Samantha and Gabby sat together watching them. “I hope you’re feeling at home here in town,” Gabby said. “It can take a while to get readjusted.”

  “No kidding,” Samantha said. “I didn’t have the best reputation when I lived here before, and sometimes I feel like I’m in a battle to overcome that.”

  “With people like Mrs. Markowski?” Gabby asked.

  “Her, and others, too.” Samantha picked at a loose splinter on the edge of the bench. “The truth is, I made a lot of mistakes, and people know about some of them. I guess it will just take time to see if I can fit in here again.”

  “Do you want to?” Gabby asked.

  Samantha considered that. She had come back to Bethlehem Springs as a favor to Cheryl, to help temporarily with Mikey. She hadn’t intended to stay. But if she could get some kind of a career going here, she actually wouldn’t mind. “I like this town,” she said. “It’s peaceful and warmhearted, at least for the most part.”

  Gabby smiled. “It’s not perfect. I’ve had some issues readjusting because of my past here, just like you. But I’m glad I made the effort. Reese and I have a wonderful life here, and I’m able to be close to my grandmother as well.”

  “You’re fortunate,” Samantha said.

  “I feel really blessed. But it wasn’t always this way, and everything isn’t always easy. If you want to make it work here, you can. Just don’t let your own attitudes and fears get in the way.”

  “Easier said than done,” Samantha said. “Those old habits of thought die hard.”

  Gabby studied her, her eyes calm and knowing. “They do. They do die hard. In fact, I don’t think we can ever really get rid of our hang-ups on our own strength. Especially if they’re pretty significant. It definitely took a leap of faith for me, and by that I mean faith in God.”

  “I’m a believer,” Samantha said quickly. “I wasn’t, not in school, but life events brought me close to the Lord, and my AA sponsor helped me figure out some of that stuff.”

  “That’s good,” Gabby said. “But that was back where you lived before, right?”

  “Yeah.” Samantha sighed. “And it takes a while to make new friends, new close friends.”

  “Well, I hope you consider me a friend,” Gabby said. “You know, Hannah and I get together pretty often, and you’d be welcome to join in.”

  “My cousin Hannah?”

  “Yes. We got to know each other over the last year or so, working on some projects for Rescue Haven. She’s the main dog trainer we work with, and she’s great.” Gabby smiled. “I did briefly feel jealous of how close she and Reese were, but I got over it pretty quickly.”

  “Does Hannah know how you felt?”

  “Yes. We had a good laugh over it, in the end. She thinks of Reese as a friend, sometimes even an annoying brother. And Reese and I are...well, we’re doing good.” A slight pink colored her face.

  Jealousy stabbed at Samantha. How great would it be to have a man who cared about you the way Reese obviously cared for Gabby, and to be secure in his love?

  “Anyway,” Gabby went on. “Now, Hannah and I walk together a lot. I push Izzy in her stroller. I’m guessing she would love it if you and Mikey came along.” She reached out and squeezed Samantha’s hand, just for a second. “And I’d love it, too.”

  They got busy with the children then, and Mikey looked at the dogs some more, seeming entranced with Boomer in particular. Samantha tried her best not to encourage his affection for the big black dog. She had to respect Corbin’s stated limits and his rights over Mikey as his guardian.

  She felt heartened by her conversation with Gabby. If she made some good friends here in town, maybe she would be able to make some kind of a life here for herself.

  One that ultimately wouldn’t involve Corbin and Mikey, she reminded herself. That situation couldn’t last. Corbin would figure out how to care for Mikey himself—he was already improving at it by the day—and soon, he’d find a daycare spot for when he needed to be at work.

  Her heart sank at the thought of their cozy domestic arrangement ending.

  But at least she liked this town, which she hadn’t expected when she’d come back at Cheryl’s request. It was a good place to live. For the most part, people didn’t judge her for her past.

  Maybe, just maybe, it would work out for her to stay, build a home here.

  * * *

  When Corbin returned to Rescue Haven to pick up Samantha and Mikey, he sat for a few minutes in his vehicle, getting his bearings. Not physically, but mentally and spiritually.

  He didn’t know what to do.

  He was drawn to Samantha like a horse to sugar cubes. He felt happy going home when she was there. He liked eating meals with her and talking over the small issues of the day. He enjoyed working with her to take care of Mikey.

  Unfortunately, that wasn’t where it ended. He wanted to hold her in his arms.

  But that was the problem. He couldn’t in good faith take the relationship any deeper, knowing that he wouldn’t even consider making a commitment to her.

  He tipped his head back and closed his eyes, wordlessly praying. Wordlessly because he didn’t know what to say.

  Moments later, a tap on his window brought him out of his prayers. Reese. Corbin climbed out of the car and shook his friend’s hand.

  “You okay in there?” Reese asked.

  “Yes. No. I’m a little unsettled.” He wouldn’t have admitted that truth to just anyone, but he and Reese were close. Reese had talked over his issues with Gabby when the two of them were falling in love, and though Corbin hadn’t had any brilliant insights, he knew Reese had felt better after their talk.

  Today might be the day for Reese to return the favor.

  By unspoken agreement, they didn’t head into the barn. Instead, they walked toward the outdoor area where Reese was repairing a fence. “Boys don’t get here for another...” Reese checked the time on his phone. “Half an hour.
Got to fix this so they can bring the dogs out here. Give me a hand?”

  “Sure.” So Corbin held the wire mesh in place while Reese hammered a frame around it. Reese’s service overseas had resulted in the loss of a hand, but with his prosthetic hook, he was better than most people at woodworking and home repairs.

  “Unsettled how?” Reese asked as he hammered, adjusted the wood, hammered some more.

  Corbin opened his mouth to answer and then shut it again. He’d been in a position to give Reese advice before, but now he was the one who needed help. That wasn’t a familiar position to be in.

  Reese nodded toward a small box of nails. “Grab a couple of those for me, will you?” After Corbin did and held them so Reese could hammer, Reese spoke again. “Wouldn’t have anything to do with Samantha, would it?”

  “It’s obvious?” Corbin sighed.

  “To someone who knows you pretty well, yeah. Never saw you look at a woman the way you look at her.”

  Corbin blew out a breath and sat back, lifting his warm face to catch the spring breeze. “She’s a huge help with Mikey,” he said.

  “Gabby’s grandma is a huge help with Izzy,” Reese said, “but I don’t look at her the way you look at Samantha.”

  “Good point.” Corbin picked up the repaired section of fence and carried it over to the spot where it belonged, Reese following along with his tools. “Nothing can happen, though,” he continued, “so it’s tough having her live at my place.”

  “Why can’t anything happen?” Reese lined up the fencing, eyeballed it, made an adjustment.

  Corbin frowned. He didn’t want to gossip about Samantha’s alcoholism, but she’d been open about it when she’d talked to Reese and Gabby before. “She has a drinking problem.”

  Reese’s head snapped around to face him. “Still?”

  “No! I mean, I’ve never seen any evidence of it. She’s in AA.”

  “Okay. I thought you meant you’d seen her drinking or smelled it on her breath or something.” He whacked a couple more nails and then stood back to survey his work. “She’s been sober for a while, right?”