Only for You

by C. C. Wood

  "Another baby?" I asked, lifting my head. My eyes were wide as I stared at him.

  "You just want one?" he asked.

  I shook my head and he smiled. "I hoped you'd want at least two."

  "I really want three or four," I admitted. "As much as my brothers annoy me, I love them and I want my baby to have the same thing growing up."

  "We'll say three and leave our options open, how does that sound?" he asked.

  I nodded and sniffed. Then, I took a second to brace myself and said, "I really do love you."

  His hands came up to cup my face and his hazel eyes filled my vision. "I love you, too."

  When he kissed me, I knew it was true.

  20

  We were still sitting on my childhood bed, kissing, when someone tapped lightly on the door.

  As we pulled apart, the door opened and my mother came inside, shutting it behind her.

  I wiped my face with a clean tissue and said, "I'm so sorry, Mama. I have no idea what came over me."

  Her smile was serene and full of understanding. "Oh, honey, that was nothing compared to the fits I used to throw when I was pregnant. That's why your brother, D.J., made that stupid comment. Robert was trying to be funny and defuse the situation, which means he only made it worse. As usual."

  I laughed a little at that because it was an accurate description of my two eldest brothers.

  "If it makes you feel any better, they're both walking around here like kicked puppies and Letitia gave D.J. an earful after you did. He apologized to J.J. already and I think he's waiting until you've calmed down a little before he comes in and apologizes to you."

  Her eyes took us both in. "Now, I didn't hear what was said until the very end and it's none of my business how you two got together as long as you're both happy now. Based on the fact that you were snuggled together when I came in, I'm guessing you're both happy?"

  J.J. and I both nodded.

  "Good. That's all that matters to me. That and my new grandbaby." She pointed at me. "That means you're staying home from work tonight and that's straight from your boss. She said that after a couple of days rest, you can come back to work on Tuesday as long as your blood pressure isn't up." When I opened my mouth to argue, my mother lifted a hand in a "stop" motion and continued. "And your father-in-law agrees with her and told me to tell you to go home, put your feet up, sleep at least eight or nine hours, and do nothing but be lazy tomorrow or he was telling Dr. Stubens that you needed to come in for a visit."

  I gaped at her. "He what?"

  J.J. just chuckled and I shot him a warning look.

  "He's just trying to make sure you take good care of yourself, darlin'," he said.

  I sighed and the fight went right out of me. After my outburst and the tears, I was actually exhausted. I probably wouldn't have been able to work tonight anyway.

  "Well, the food is ready. Think you can scrounge up the energy to come into the dining room and eat?" my mother asked, raising her eyebrows.

  Though she phrased it as a question, I knew that it wasn't. I was expected to pull myself together and go back downstairs and have lunch with the rest of the family, humiliation be damned.

  "Let me wash my face and I'll be right down," I said.

  She smiled at me and gave me a single nod. "I'll call the kids in and tell them to wash up. By the time they're done with that, you should be downstairs."

  In other words, I had seven or eight minutes, tops.

  "Okay, Mom."

  She left the room, closing the door softly behind her.

  J.J. waited a moment before he said, "If you're not up to this, we can leave. I'll carry you out if I have to."

  I smiled at him, the offer making me love him even more. "It'll be okay," I said, taking a deep breath. "I'll have to face them all eventually. This way I have regret on my side, at least my brothers' regret, so they'll be much more likely to accept my apology gracefully."

  J.J. shook his head. He was all too aware of how my brothers could be. "If you're okay with it, I'll stay with you the rest of the afternoon."

  "Thanks." I forced myself to leave his embrace and get off the bed. I walked to the door that led to my bathroom. My dad had converted one of the linen closets into a three-quarter bath for me when I turned thirteen. I wasn't sure if it was for my privacy or if he was afraid my brothers' friends would start "accidentally" walking in on me if I used the other upstairs bath, but I'd been extremely grateful when he'd done it.

  The room was tiny with only enough space for a corner shower, a minuscule pedestal sink, and a toilet, but it had been like heaven to my thirteen-year-old self. No boy funk, no pee on the toilet, and no gross stuff growing in the shower.

  I washed my face with cool water and used a damp cloth to wipe away the last traces of my make-up. My eyes were still swollen and a little red, but I no longer had black smears around them.

  When I emerged, J.J. was standing by the door that led into the hallway. "Ready?" he asked.

  I nodded and he held out his hand. I took it, lacing our fingers together.

  We went back downstairs and I heard Danny, D.J.'s oldest, ask, "Where's Auntie Lee?"

  I realized that I hadn't given the kids a single thought when I'd had my tantrum and I was so glad that they had still been outside and missed it.

  I knew that my brothers weren't shy about cursing in front of their kids, but I knew that my outburst would have scared them because I almost never yelled.

  "She was upstairs but she'll be down in a second," my father answered.

  I had no idea if he'd witnessed my tantrum but I knew he wouldn't bat an eyelash. He knew that I was harder on myself than he ever could be.

  Letitia was there, herding her two boys into the powder room attached to the kitchen, but she stopped and came over to me when she saw me.

  "I'm so sorry," I said before she could speak.

  "It's okay, honey. It's not the first time I've seen you lose your temper since I met your brother and, knowing him, you'll do it again at some point."

  "I shouldn't have brought you into it."

  She gave me a tight hug. "I'm kinda glad you did because I'm going to get special treatment for at least a week or two because you made him feel bad." She laughed and released me. "So, maybe I should be thanking you."

  "Thank you for not being mad at me."

  "It'd take a lot more than that to make me mad at you, Lee. I mean, I put up with your brother, after all."

  I had to laugh then, and she left to get her boys cleaned up before lunch.

  Robert was lurking in the doorway, his hands in his pockets. His head was down but he was looking up at me from beneath his eyebrows. When Letitia left, he came over.

  "I'm sorry, Lee," he said without giving me a chance to speak. "I never should have shared that information. It wasn't anyone's business, not even mine." He leaned in and gave me a hug. "I can't promise I'll never stick my nose where it doesn't belong again, but I promise I'll try not to be an asshole about it."

  I didn't have the energy to give him a hard time for cursing, so I just used my free arm to hug him back. J.J. was still holding my hand and standing close to me. "I'm sorry, too, Robbie. I love you."

  Robert squeezed me tighter for just a moment, released me, and held a hand out to J.J. "I apologize again, man. I've been worried about my baby sister, but it's no excuse for bringing up private business in front of everyone else."

  J.J. took his hand and shook it. "I have a sister of my own, so I understand why you were worried. But I love Lee and while our marriage may not have started out the way most do, we're working it out."

  Robert looked relieved at J.J.'s words. Not that he understood, but that he loved me. "Now, I won't worry as much. I always liked you, and I still do, but she's my baby sister and I'll do whatever it takes to protect her."

  "I will, too," J.J. answered.

  They did some weird man-nod at each other and Robert disappeared.

  It seemed that my mother h
ad put out the call because D.J. was next to come into the kitchen.

  "I'm sorry, Leelee," he said as he came to a stop in front of me. He looked down at the toes of his boots and I half-expected him to kick at the linoleum on the kitchen floor. "I don't have the right to talk to you like that and I deserved it."

  I bit back a laugh because I was pretty sure those were Letitia's words and not his own. But he obviously meant them because when he looked back at me, I could see the regret all over his face.

  "I just want you to be happy, honey," he whispered.

  "Stop making me cry!" I hissed, letting go of Jay's hand so I could hug my oldest brother.

  He held me back. "I'll do my best, but you are pregnant, so no guarantees."

  I leaned back and tugged his chest hair where it stuck out of the neck of his t-shirt. "That's how you got in trouble the first time, mister," I said.

  He chuckled. "I know, but you ladies need to take pity on us poor men. We have no idea how to handle the mood swings when you're pregnant, so we try to lighten up the situation when you get all teary."

  "Choose something less chauvinistic next time," I replied, sniffing.

  "As I said, I'll do my best."

  He escaped before I could smack his arm like I wanted to.

  Clayton came over and gave me a hug. "I'm sorry, too."

  I hugged him back. "You weren't the one who did anything," I said.

  "I should have listened," he whispered in my ear. "I'll talk to Danielle when I get home. I promise."

  I hugged him tighter. "Good. She needs you right now and it's okay for you to need her back, you know. You don't have to be Superman. Just be her man."

  "Stop with the words of wisdom," he grunted as he let me go and stepped back. "You're the youngest of us. You shouldn't be smarter than us."

  I glanced at J.J. and the ghost of a smile crossed my lips. "I'm not always smarter than you." I looked back at Clay. "Just ninety-nine percent of the time."

  He grinned and shook his head before he went the way of my other two brothers.

  I took J.J.'s hand again and we walked into the dining room. I stopped next to my new in-laws and said, "I'm so sorry that y'all had to witness that."

  To my surprise, it was Malcolm who got to his feet and embraced me. He always gave me a hug, but usually it was one per day. Cam liked to joke that her dad had a hug quota with his family because he got so many of them from his patients at work.

  "You're among family. If you're going to yell and get upset, there's no better place," he murmured in my ear. "And I have brothers of my own and two kids, so I know exactly how they can be."

  I giggled. He released me and I ended up right in Colette's embrace.

  "Honey, that was nothing compared to some of the knock-down-drag-outs that Cam and J.J. used to have. There's no need to be embarrassed with us."

  "Thank you," I whispered.

  She let me go and I turned to Cam, Brody, Sierra, and Ben.

  It was Brody who lifted his hands and spoke. "Don't apologize to us. I always used to worry that Cam and Sierra would run roughshod over you but now that fear has been appeased. In fact, feel free to practice on them."

  Cam and Sierra were sitting on each side of him and they simultaneously socked him in the shoulders. "Ow! What was that for?" he whined, crossing his arms so he could rub both of his opposite shoulders.

  "You know what you did," Cam said darkly.

  "Still, I'm sorry you had to see it anyway," I interrupted. "I don't like it when I act like that so I try not to do it more than once every two or three years."

  With the apologies out of the way, the rest of the meal went by quickly and with a lot of laughter. Despite my earlier fears about pink streamers and bunting on every available wall or hanging space, there were only three small bouquets of pink flowers on the table, pink lemonade in our glasses, and a chocolate cake with pink-tinted vanilla icing, made by Colette.

  All in all, it was fairly tame in terms of decor.

  My fears were reignited however when Colette said, "Lee, dear, your mother and I would like to plan your baby shower. Could you please put together a list of people you'd like to invite?"

  I glanced at the two of them. "Uh, a baby shower?"

  My mother ignored my question and picked up right where Colette left off. "Oh, and be sure to create one of those Amazon wish list things for the baby so people know what you'll need. And don't forget to put different sized diapers on there because you won't believe how fast that baby is going to grow."

  "Baby shower?" I repeated.

  My mother gave me a droll look. "Yes, Lee, a baby shower. A lot of people are going to want to do something for you and the baby and this will let them feel like they contributed somehow."

  I gave J.J. a pleading look but he didn't seem to understand why I was freaking out.

  I turned back to my mother and Colette. "I really appreciate it, y'all, but I'm not sure I want to have a shower."

  My mother opened her mouth to argue with me but Colette spoke first. "Why not, sweetie?"

  J.J.'s hand squeezed my leg gently in support.

  "Being the center of attention makes me a little uncomfortable," I admitted.

  Colette's answering smile was sweet. "Then, we'll keep it small, mostly family and a few friends. No more than twenty people. We'll have it at my house instead of a party room or something. And not too many games. Does that sound okay?"

  I nodded.

  My mother didn't add anything, just nodded her head.

  "Just don't plan it during her Christmas break from school," J.J. said.

  Everyone looked at him, but he turned to Cam. "Do you think you can give her the week after her finals off of work at Crave?"

  It was my turn to grab his leg, but it was in more of a futile gesture to get him to stop. He covered my clutching fingers with his but otherwise ignored me.

  "Sure," Cam said. "She's already got finals week off."

  I started to argue but she just lifted a finger at me. "No arguing. You need to focus on your finals and not work."

  I closed my mouth and Cam looked back at J.J. and asked, "Mind if I ask why?"

  He grinned. "We're going on our honeymoon then."

  Cam squealed and clapped her hands. "Yay! I'm so glad you're taking her somewhere. Be sure it's warm and sunny there, though. And definitely a beach."

  Um, why were they planning the honeymoon I was going on without my input?

  J.J. seemed to sense my thoughts because he looked at me. "I don't know, Cam. I think it's more important I ask Lee where she wants to go, don't you?"

  His sister sighed, this time happily. "Good plan, big brother."

  "A warm, sunny beach sound good to you?" he asked.

  I shrugged. "I don't know. I'll probably be a lot bigger by then. I'm not sure I want to walk around in a swimsuit with a huge belly."

  "You'll be adorable," Mom said. "We'll find you a bikini so you can show off the baby bump! Isn't that the thing on social media now?"

  I winced even though she was right. Most women didn't hide their baby bumps anymore, but I wasn't sure I was brave enough to do it.

  "Forget about the swimsuit thing," J.J. said. "Does relaxing on the beach sound nice?"

  I nodded.

  "Then we'll figure out where we can go where you'll be comfortable."

  I smiled at him and nodded again. "Okay," I added for good measure.

  He leaned closer. "I love you, Lee. And your mom is right, you'll be cute in a bikini, even with a baby bump."

  My face flushed but I leaned into him further. "I love you, too. I'll think about the bikini."

  "That's all I can ask for," he said.

  When we pulled apart, he left his arm around the back of my chair and he played with my hair.

  "Dad! Dad!"

  Corey flew through the door between the kitchen and the dining room, her hair a mess and her face flushed. Robert was already on his feet when she appeared.

  "There's
a mama raccoon and babies outside!" she said. "They're so cute! Come see!"

  "I refuse," Sierra said. "I've seen enough raccoons to last a lifetime already."

  I had no idea where that statement came from but Ben, her husband, cracked up and pulled her into his side for a huge hug.

  Everyone else got to their feet and followed Corey toward the rear of the house.

  J.J. and I were slower to join them, but when we did, I couldn't contain my smile. The mama raccoon had two babies with her and they were all loitering at the edge of the yard where the trees were thicker.

  The boys were standing on the back deck, watching in awe, and all the adults were gathered behind them.

  "They're so cute," Colette said quietly.

  I studied them and silently agreed. Then, I realized that the raccoon looked familiar.

  Before I could say anything, J.J. asked, "Is that the same raccoon that you've been feeding, Lee?"

  "No, that's Gary," Cam argued.

  As soon as she spoke, the mama raccoon stopped moving and lifted her head, looking at us. She took a few steps forward, the babies following her.

  "I don't think Gary is a good name now that we know she's a girl," Brody said.

  Cam laughed. "I guess you're right." She continued to chuckle. "How about Garina?"

  Everyone groaned and shook their heads.

  "That can't be your raccoon," J.J. stated. "That's the one that's been at Lee's house since I moved in. I recognize the missing chunk of her tail." He looked at me. "Right? That looks like Rascal, doesn't it?"

  "It is Rascal," I said.

  "It can't be. Your house is a few miles from mine," Cam argued. "Raccoons don't travel that far, do they?"

  "I don't know," I answered with a shrug.

  Corey sighed, rolled her eyes, and pulled her phone out of her pocket. "Let's Google it."

  I bit back a laugh because even though Corey didn't have siblings, she'd seen how her uncles acted and she knew that a loud, good-natured argument was brewing.

  As she typed away at her phone, I looked around and realized I was surrounded by my family. And I was happy.