Fuck, he wanted her, too. As he drove into her, her soft body trembling against him and both of them moving in sync with each other, there was an urge to tell her how he felt. Seeing her tonight in the party, happy and free of restriction like the Ivy he had first met, made him realize how much he wanted to be with her. Just watching her tonight had brought him so much joy… She had forgotten she was among supernaturals as she laughed and danced with them, which meant that in the long-run, she might adjust to him being a shifter.
We could be together.
As he filled her again and again…when she told him how much she needed him…the words left his mouth. “I love you.”
She froze against him at his words, but before she could reject him, he pushed inside her hard, gripping her hips to grind her around his cock…wanting her to think of nothing but the pleasure he was giving her. As stars burst before his vision, she came around him, and his own release followed. Keeping his hold on her, he rested his forehead on the wall, just above her shoulder, panting until his breathing returned to normal. He then lifted his head to look into her face. She smiled up at him before giving him a soft kiss on the lips, but she said nothing. He got it. She wanted to pretend he hadn’t said what he did. And for now, he would go along with what she wanted.
He left the cubicle and grabbed a fresh towel before offering her his hand. When she stepped out alongside him, he ran the towel over her body. Her eyes were bright, a wide smile on her face as she closed her eyes, enjoying the experience. If only she could stay with him longer than one night…
There was no point dwelling on that and spoiling the time they did have together. He grabbed a bathrobe from the cupboard in the corner and wrapped it around her. Taking another towel, he wrapped her hair in it. He then toweled off before shrugging into a bathrobe. They both returned to the bedroom and settled on the sofa with each other. She leaned against him, and he placed his arm around her, kissing the top of her head. A silence descended around them…that of a couple together so long that they didn’t need words to fill the space between them.
Eventually, she spoke. “I didn’t know you were a martial artist.”
“I trained for years. These days I do some teaching. And of course, I practice every day at my place.” He had converted the largest room in his apartment for the purpose. He would love to show it to her one day, even if it was completely different to what she was used to…in fact, that might be a good reason for her to visit.
“It must be so great,” she murmured, “Being able to look after yourself. Defend yourself against attack…”
“It certainly doesn’t hurt to have such skills.” After a pause, “Fancy learning?” Not just because his personal belief was that everyone should know how to defend themselves, but because it would give him the chance to spend more time with her.
She chuckled. “It’s a bit late for me—”
Something a lot of potential students worried about. “It’s never too late. All these doubts are in your mind—in fact, defending yourself against your own mind is one of the most useful practices learned in martial arts.”
“I don’t need it,” she murmured, “I have people around me to take care of me.”
The Association. He bit back the words that came to his lips. She was dependent on them, which wasn’t the same as someone looking out for you. But once she learned to take care of herself… “Well, if you ever change your mind—”
She shook her head. “Such activities are not encouraged among our women…”
She didn’t finish what she was about to say, but he understood. He could only imagine how a man like Michael would react if she became interested in martial arts. He’d probably consider it a personal affront…see it as a slight on his manhood. Junaid pulled his arms tighter around her, changing the subject. “You enjoyed the party, didn’t you?”
She smiled against his chest. “I certainly did. Angie and Alyssa are great, aren’t they?”
“They sure are. Perfect for Shaun and Blade.”
“Even though they’re human?”
“That doesn’t matter when you want to be with someone…does it?”
She glanced up at him. “I might not have agreed not long ago, but now…” Again, she didn’t finish what she’d been about to say. But it was enough for him that she was beginning to change her mind on the subject. And now it was her turn to talk about something else. “Alyssa…I couldn’t help but notice her arms…” Her voice trailed away. “Sorry…it’s none of my business.”
“Her scars?” When she nodded, “It’s all right. It’s not a secret. Alyssa went through some shit before she met Blade. Like a lot of sex workers.”
She tensed in his arms. “Alyssa used to be a sex worker?”
“She’s still the same person you thought was great just a few minutes ago.”
“Yes, I know…but—” The struggle was obvious in her expression. “I hugged her…shared food with her…” Fuck. The hope that had risen in him a few moments ago crashed again. Was he stupid for imagining her mind could ever be free of that organization? “Blade…he doesn’t mind?”
“Mind what?”
“That she’s sold her body to all those men…done God knows what with them…”
He curbed his irritation at her words. She came from a different world, so how could he expect her to feel the same way as him on the subject? “Why should it make a difference?” Junaid palmed her face and lifted it so he could look into her eyes. “It was a job. Not a pleasant one, but despite all the crap and torture she went through, she’s making a go of things. We all have a lot of respect for her.”
“Respect? But in my world, such a woman would be irredeemable.”
He could imagine. “It’s interesting how Association members badmouth sex workers and blame them for society’s ills, yet they were happy to back James, the mobster who put Alyssa and others to work.” And now he couldn’t prevent his voice from hardening. “He was personally responsible for many of her scars, and you’ve no idea of what he was about to do to her when we stopped him.” Thank fuck; they got there on time.
She snuggled closer to him, as if for comfort. “Let’s not talk about it…”
Good idea. There was enough to separate them as it was. Tonight, they would make the most of being together.
He stood and lifted her in his arms, carrying her to the bed. He lay her back on it and opened the belt of her bathrobe, pulling it away from her. After removing his own, he got into bed with her, pulling the covers over them. She snuggled against him, her head resting against his chest as if she belonged there. And part of him hoped she did.
Despite their differences, that part of him believed they could be together, not just for tonight, but always…
SLEEPING IN A MAN’S ARMS…she’d never thought it could be so wonderful. Spending the night cuddled against Junaid had felt so right, his arm wrapped around her as if he wanted to protect her even in sleep.
And waking up nestled against him…paradise.
It was still dark outside when Ivy awakened. She edged closer to his warm body, and even though his eyes were still closed, his arm tightened around her, pulling her close. And his words returned to her.
I love you.
Last night, it had been so tempting to say it back to him. For a moment, the words nearly slipped from her lips, but she held them back. After all, she couldn’t love someone like him…
But was that her belief…or that of others around her? She’d been brought up to distrust and stay away from anyone whose way didn’t match her own…to fear difference.
It was why she’d been so quick to judge Alyssa…Alyssa who had been so welcoming and didn’t care whether she was human or supernatural. Junaid said the mobster James was attacked to save her, but according to John, the supernaturals had wanted to prevent him from doing the lord’s work. Deep down, she believed the shifter. The Manhattan leader had lied to defend a man who did terrible things to women like Alyssa…and then he
spoke of truth and morality in his weekly sermons. For a moment, she felt embarrassed…that she belonged to such an organization. And to think she’d thought Junaid wasn’t good enough for her…
“What is it?” he asked, startling her.
“You must have a pretty low opinion of me,” she murmured, “For belonging to an organization you hate.”
“Never.” He kissed her on the lips. “I love you, Ivy, as you are.” She shook her head, not wanting to hear the words that would tear her resolve apart…because she was beginning to suspect she felt the same about him. He lifted his head to stare down at her. “I don’t understand it, but this feeling…it can’t be anything else.” He went to his back and took her with him, holding her against his chest, close. “I’m not going to ask how you feel about me. I know you’ve been through some shit…and I don’t know what’s made you so scared, but take your time to figure out how you feel about me. For now, the fact that you reached out to me is enough.” She lifted her face to look into his eyes. Despite his words, she sensed that hope inside him. As if to confirm her suspicion, he whispered, “I hope you’ll come around to the idea of being with me.”
She already had…but what difference did it make? She didn’t have the choice to be with him. Burying her head against his chest, she experienced a peace in his arms she had never thought possible. She trailed her fingers along the length of his arm, and he smiled when she pressed her palm against his.
He flipped her so she was on her back and then he was on top of her again, his lips curled up in a smile, his thumb trailing over her bottom lip. “You’ve no idea of how much I want that, Ivy. The chance to be with you.” He slanted his mouth over hers as his hard chest crushed her breasts. His fingers wrapped in her hair as he parted her lips with his tongue so he could slip it inside…stoking her passion and sending sensation racing through her. Her skin tingled wherever he touched her. “I’ll keep saying it until you believe me,” he murmured against her ear. “I love you.”
She must have dozed off, because when she awakened again, it was light outside. Junaid was resting on his elbow as he stared down at her, a smile on his lips, as if he’d been waiting for her to awaken.
“Sleep well?” he asked, trailing his fingers across her jawline.
Over his shoulder, she glimpsed the clock on the wall. 7.30? Resisting the invitation in his brown eyes, she pulled away from him…how had she slept in so late?
When she scrambled from the bed, he growled, his eyes traveling over her naked body as she reached for her clothes, which room service had returned clean and dry last night. She stepped out of his way. “I have to get ready.”
As she pulled on her underwear, he lazed on the bed, his arms above his head as he relaxed back and watched her get dressed. “Come on…tell me you don’t want a shower together.”
That thought nearly made her return to the bed. Another shower together…their bodies wet and lathered…
“I’ll have a shower at home,” she said. “You’ve no idea of what mother will be going through.” And God help her if John paid one of his surprise visits while she was out…how would mother answer when he asked where she was? A plea entered her tone. “Come on, Junaid. I need to get home. Please.”
His smile faltered, and he instantly got up and dressed so fast that he was ready before she was. She fastened her coat before stepping toward the door and reaching for the handle, but he took her hand and pulled her to him to kiss her lips. As he brushed his mouth across hers, she sighed, soft. And when he deepened the kiss, his taste forced her to melt against him.
No, she didn’t want to go back to that soulless existence. She wanted to stay here with Junaid, lose herself in his passion as she forgot about the world outside…
Suddenly, he stepped back, smiling down at her. “Come on. Let’s get you home.”
Their arms linked, they left the hotel. By the time they reached the gate, Junaid’s car was already there. They got inside, and before he started the engine, he leaned over and gave her another kiss, as if he couldn’t get enough of her. His eyes kept flitting to her as he drove, and when they waited to board the ferry, he held her hand, trailing a finger across her palm, his eyes on hers. When someone sounded their car horn behind them, they both jolted in their seats, realizing that the vehicles had cleared ahead. She returned his grin as he drove on to the ferry.
Too soon, they were outside her place. When he leaned over to kiss her, she pulled away, glancing around, but the street was empty at this time. His smile faltered as he leaned back in the seat, sighing. “Sorry. But after last night, I forgot you’re a bird in a cage.” She thumped him, playful, and his smile returned. “See you soon?” he asked.
It wasn’t right, behaving as if they were a couple that was dating, but she couldn’t let go of this fantasy, not yet. “Yes. I’ll call you.”
She left the car, and as she approached the large doors of her house, it was as if they reproached her. She unlocked the doors and entered the corridor. Fareeda stood there, her eyes wide as they landed on Ivy. She got the feeling the maid had been stood there a while, waiting for her to return. And now Fareeda’s eyes went to the dining hall. “Your mother is in there.”
“You told her? That I was out last night?”
“No. But before she took her sleeping pills, she went to check on you, but you weren’t there. And you left your phone in your room. She’s been awake most of the night waiting for you.”
When Ivy approached the dining hall, her steps were labored. She paused with her hand on the door handle. “Did mother eat?”
Fareeda shook her head. “I made breakfast, but she didn’t touch it.”
“Prepare breakfast for both of us. We’ll eat in around half an hour.”
The promise of harmony returning to their little household perked Fareeda’s mood up no end, and she was humming as she turned to go to the kitchen.
Ivy opened the door and entered the breakfast room. She stood at the doorway, barely able to recognize mother. Her skin was blotchy and eyes red, and she was still in her dressing gown, something unheard of at this time. Ivy sat at the table, on the seat opposite her, so they could make eye contact.
Mother knew.
She might not guess at the details, but she knew that Ivy had spent the night with someone. It was obvious in her pained expression. But it brought no guilt, only relief. Ivy couldn’t continue with this farce any longer. After that night with Junaid, she couldn’t go into a lifetime of passionless duty with Michael. “Mother. I want to talk to you.”
Pearl shook her head. “I’d noticed something different about you since you went out for that night with your friends.” Her hands trembled as she clutched them together. “I convinced myself it was nothing—pre-wedding nerves—we all suffer them, but I was wrong, wasn’t I?” When Ivy nodded, “Who is he?” Ivy clutched the table cloth, squeezing it between her fingers. “I gather he’s not from the Association?”
“No, he isn’t.”
“And have you—” Her mother didn’t finish her question, her voice catching.
“I’m no longer a virgin, mother.”
Mother’s face paled. Ivy expected recriminations, shouts and words of damnation, but instead, a lone tear trickled down her mother’s cheek and fell on to the table cloth. “Michael must not find out.”
“But mother, I—”
Pearl shook her head, holding her hands over her ears. “I do not want to hear anything. You only have to make it through the wedding night without him finding out. There are methods you can use…I will tell you before the ceremony what you need to do—”
“Mother.” Ivy’s voice trembled, but she took a deep breath and said the words. “I don’t want to marry him.”
Now her mother’s face hardened, and the mask that appeared was one that chilled Ivy to her bones. “I would consider your future carefully, Ivy. You saw what happened to Ann that day. You’ve lived in luxury all your life, unlike me. When there is no money, the first thi
ng to go out of the window is romance.” She glanced around the room. “Do not give this up for a man.”
“But how can I marry a man I do not want to be with?” One she couldn’t even stand being next to. A man who made her skin crawl.
“Michael is your future—our future. We have this life only because of the Association. The day you announce you don’t want to marry Michael, they will throw us out and ostracize us. We will be alone, like we were after the death of your father. Remember, Ivy, remember how it was…”
The bliss she had experienced with Junaid dissipated as that old dread clutched Ivy’s chest. The memory of hiding under the stairway, with nobody to turn to…sleeping in mother’s bed and being woken by her screams. Anticipating knocks at the doors and the sounds of windows opening. That fear returned and engulfed her, making her chest constrict.
“Ivy?”
Mother’s voice came as if from a distance, as she remembered hiding in the corner of her bedroom, staring at the door and fearing that any moment now, masked men would break it down. Even at that age, she knew the terrible things grown men could do to a girl…
For a moment, she had believed she could be with Junaid. Relief had cut through those nightmares when she woke up in his arms this morning. But he was a supernatural and sooner or later, warfare would break out between his kind and humans. And what then? She had spent her life under the protection of a human organization, being controlled by it, but how much worse would it be putting herself at the mercy of supernaturals?
With the Association, she might never have independence, but at least she was with familiar people. People who would protect her no matter what happened.
My own kind.
“You are right, mother. The best thing is for me to marry Michael.”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
* * *
IT WAS LATE WHEN JUNAID received a message on his phone from Shaun, the wolf shifter. You still want to meet? I’m in Eclipse tonight.
Blood Moon Box Set Page 59
