One Last Summer

by Connelly, Victoria

  ‘I’m really sorry if you’re feeling left out, Lisa.’

  ‘I’m not feeling left out.’

  ‘No?’

  Lisa pouted. ‘Well, maybe I am.’

  ‘I should have told you and Audrey about Honor coming,’ Harrie admitted. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t. But I didn’t think it would upset things between us. I thought it would be a case of the more the merrier.’

  Lisa glanced down, picking at her nails, and Harrie quickly wondered what she could do to make up for her obvious gaffe.

  ‘Is there anything special you’d like for dinner tonight? I’m cooking.’

  Lisa shook her head. ‘Actually, I’m going out.’

  ‘Really?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Are you going to tell me where?’

  ‘Just to the local pub.’

  ‘On your own?’

  ‘I’m going on my own, yes, but I’ll be meeting somebody there.’

  ‘Oh!’ Harrie couldn’t help but sound surprised. ‘Would you care to elucidate?’

  ‘No, not really,’ Lisa said, quickly crossing the room and making her way up the spiral stairs.

  It was then that Honor entered from the living room.

  ‘What’s going on?’ she asked.

  Harrie placed her hands on her hips. ‘You know, I’m not really sure.’

  Entering the pub at exactly eight o’clock, Lisa spotted Alfie leaning up against the bar, his broad back towards her as he laughed at something a man standing next to him had said. He was wearing a pale-blue shirt and smart, clean jeans. She took a deep breath, suddenly wondering if she’d made the right decision in coming tonight but, as Alfie turned around and spotted her, she realised it was too late to change her mind.

  ‘Lisa!’ he called, beckoning her over. ‘What can I get you to drink?’

  ‘Oh, erm – a glass of white wine,’ she said, defaulting to her old standby. Heaven only knew that she needed something to still her nerves.

  A couple of minutes later and they were both seated at a table next to a window at the back of the pub which overlooked a pleasant garden.

  Lisa looked across the small table at Alfie and wondered what on earth she was doing there.

  ‘You look . . .’ He paused.

  ‘I look what?’ Her right hand flew to her face in fear that she was having a hot flush. ‘Red? I look red?’

  He smiled. ‘No! I was going to say that you look pretty, but I wasn’t sure if that would offend you.’

  ‘Why would you think that would offend me?’

  He shrugged. ‘I don’t know. It’s hard to know what to say to a woman these days.’

  ‘You can still tell a woman she looks pretty,’ Lisa told him.

  ‘Yeah?’

  ‘Yes.’

  There was a pause.

  ‘Well, go on then.’

  ‘What?’ he asked.

  ‘Tell me I look pretty!’

  He laughed. ‘You look pretty.’

  Lisa beamed and they both relaxed a little.

  ‘So, what made you become a gardener?’ she asked him, thinking it best to turn the attention away from herself.

  ‘I’m not.’

  ‘Oh,’ she said. ‘Well, you seem to be doing a pretty good impression of a gardener.’

  ‘I’m just filling in,’ he said. ‘It’s a summer job.’

  ‘I see,’ she said, taking a sip of her wine. ‘So, what are your plans after the summer?’

  He shifted his feet under the table. ‘Going to join my dad at his company.’

  Lisa watched the expression on his face change. ‘You – er – don’t seem too happy about that.’

  ‘Yeah, well, it is what it is.’

  ‘Can I ask what his company is?’

  Alfie shrugged. ‘Office supplies. Equipment, stationery, that sort of thing.’

  ‘Quite different from gardening then.’

  ‘You could say that.’

  ‘You like gardening, don’t you?’

  ‘It’s okay, yeah.’ His smile had returned now. ‘I’ve been trying a few things out, you know? I did a bit of travelling after university, did odd jobs here and there – some bar work – that kind of thing. I suppose I’ve been delaying the inevitable.’

  ‘You mean, working for your dad?’

  ‘I’m his only child. I’d be letting him down if I didn’t work for him there. I’ve been putting it off for as long as possible and he’s been good to let me try a few other things out, but it’s always been with the understanding that I’d work for him one day.’ He took a sip of his drink.

  ‘But you can’t do a job that you’re not going to be happy in,’ Lisa pointed out to him. ‘That’s your father’s dream, not yours.’

  ‘Yeah, but he’d be devastated if I didn’t take the job.’

  Lisa sighed. ‘Well, if you don’t mind me saying, I think it’s a bit mean of him to push you like this. I mean, can’t he find some other young man who has more of an affinity with stationery?’

  Alfie chuckled. ‘Maybe I could develop a fondness for envelopes.’

  Lisa couldn’t help but smile. ‘You’re joking about this now, but just you wait a few years. You’ll be sitting at some desk in a stuffy office, watching the hands of the clock crawl around, your skin grey from a lack of sunshine and wondering what on earth you’ve done with your life.’

  ‘So what do you suggest? I can’t hurt the old man’s feelings.’

  ‘Are you sure about that? Are you sure you want to hand your life over like this? I don’t want to incite rebellion, but this is something I feel really strongly about. You’ve got to go after your dreams, Alfie.’

  ‘Like you did with acting?’

  ‘Exactly!’

  They were quiet for a moment.

  ‘Alfie, if you could do anything, what would it be?’

  ‘Why is this so important to you?’ He looked genuinely puzzled.

  ‘Because you only get one life and you have to make it count. You don’t realise that when you’re young but, the older you get, you know that you have to grab hold of every opportunity.’ She took a sip of her wine. ‘I want to tell you something. Something I don’t usually talk about.’

  ‘Okay.’

  She swallowed hard. ‘My mother died when she was thirty-nine. I was at university when it happened. She’d been ill for a while. Cancer.’

  ‘I’m sorry.’

  Lisa paused, her fingers tight around the stem of her glass as she recalled the darkest period of her life. She still felt the loss of her mother so keenly, even though it had happened nearly thirty years ago, and she found Mother’s Day impossible to get through unless she kept her distance from social media and all the photographs of people celebrating the day with their beloved mothers. Did they know how lucky they were, she thought, to still have their mothers to show their love to?

  Looking at Alfie now, she continued, ‘My mother confided in me just before the end. She said that, although she’d led a happy life, she’d never felt completely fulfilled. She’d always wanted to sing’ – Lisa smiled at the memory – ‘but circumstances and her own lack of courage seemed to get in the way. But she’d held that dream in her heart her whole life, always hoping that fate would step in and present her with some miraculous opportunity. Only it didn’t, or at least that was what she’d thought. It wasn’t until right at the end of her life that she could look back and see that there had been plenty of opportunities, only she hadn’t recognised them. Maybe she’d been too afraid or too busy, maybe she’d made excuse after excuse, but they’d been there and she’d overlooked them. Who knows what she could have done if she’d only set her mind to it?’

  Alfie reached across the table and took Lisa’s hand in his and she instantly felt tears rising at the sweetness of his gesture.

  ‘But what if you don’t have a dream?’ he asked her.

  She frowned. ‘You’ve got to have a dream! You can’t just drift through your life with no direction.’ She blinke
d her tears away and took a deep breath. ‘Right!’ she said, getting into teacher mode. ‘We’re going to discover your dream.’

  ‘What?’ He sounded incredulous.

  ‘We’re not leaving this pub until you’ve told me what makes you happy.’

  He laughed and shook his head. ‘Being here with you makes me happy.’

  ‘Well, that’s very nice, but you can’t make a living from that.’

  He puffed out a sigh, obviously sensing that she was being serious now.

  ‘Okay,’ he said, looking thoughtful. ‘What makes me happy?’

  ‘That’s right. It can be anything. Just think.’

  ‘Rugby used to make me happy until the injury. I like gardening, but I can’t really see myself doing that. I’d never remember all those Latin names for a start.’

  Lisa nodded. ‘Good, you’re thinking.’

  He gave her a funny look.

  ‘Sorry, that’s me being a teacher.’

  ‘It’s okay,’ he said. ‘I like it.’

  She smiled, relieved that he hadn’t found her patronising.

  ‘I did once work for a family friend who runs an outdoor-activity centre for kids. That was fun,’ he revealed.

  ‘Yeah?’

  He nodded. ‘I liked the kids. Some of them were from the city and had never seen the countryside before. It was great taking them into the woods camping. They learned how to pitch a tent and make a fire and how to cook. We did orienteering too.’

  ‘So what happened?’

  ‘I gave it up.’

  ‘Why?’

  He shrugged.

  ‘Oh, Alfie!’

  ‘I’ve never really stuck at anything for long because I’ve known I was going to be working for my dad one day.’

  ‘Well, at least we’ve found something you’re passionate about,’ Lisa said.

  He held her gaze for a moment.

  ‘There are other things I’m passionate about,’ he said.

  Lisa almost spluttered on her wine as he winked at her.

  ‘I think one passion an evening is enough to be getting on with,’ she told him with authority, the teacher in her rising once again, firmly quashing the woman.

  Chapter 11

  At first, it was a novelty to have a long lie-in and be brought breakfast in bed by a husband who hadn’t had to run out of the door at first light. But, after twenty-four hours of being housebound, Audrey was ready to scream. Mike had taken some time off from work and was proving worse than any gaoler, sitting in a chair opposite her, pretending to read the newspaper when he was only really there to make sure that she didn’t sneak onto her laptop as soon as his back was turned.

  It just seemed crazy to her to sit around doing nothing. Surely sending a couple of emails or making a few phone calls couldn’t do any harm. She truly believed that she was getting more stressed by wasting time than by filling it, but Mike was having none of that. He meant her to have total rest and so her home became the sofa with a pile of magazines and books beside her and an endless stream of cups of tea which he provided.

  It was on the third day when she dared to broach the subject.

  ‘You know what?’ she said, trying to sound as casual as possible. ‘I think I might be better back at the priory.’

  Mike’s startled face appeared around the side of his newspaper. ‘What?’

  ‘I’ve been thinking about it and I really believe it would do me the world of good to spend time in the garden there. We don’t have much of a garden here, do we? And the neighbours’ kids are always so noisy at this time of year. I really think I could benefit from the grounds at the priory and even get some swimming in. The doctor said swimming was good for me, didn’t he?’

  Mike nodded, but he was looking guarded.

  ‘And being with my friends. That could only help, couldn’t it? And you must be bored sitting here with me all day. It can’t be much fun.’

  ‘I’m not bored,’ Mike assured her.

  ‘No?’

  ‘I could sit here for the rest of my life and be quite happy.’

  Audrey was aghast at this. ‘If you really mean that, I’ll have a heart attack right here and now and end it all!’

  ‘Don’t say that!’

  ‘I mean it, Mike. I don’t how much longer I can sit like this.’

  Mike ran a hand across his jaw and then nodded. ‘I know, Aud.’ He stood up.

  ‘Where are you going?’

  ‘I’m going to ring Harrie.’

  ‘But I can do that.’

  ‘Let me handle this,’ Mike said.

  ‘I can make a phone call, you know. I’m not a complete invalid.’

  But Mike had left the room and Audrey could do nothing but wait and send a telepathic message to Harrie, begging her friend to encourage her return.

  It didn’t take long before Mike was back.

  ‘I’ve spoken to Harrie and she’s keen to have you back and assures me that she’ll keep an eye on you.’

  ‘Of course she will. You won’t need to worry.’

  ‘I haven’t said you can go yet.’

  ‘Oh, Mike!’ Audrey stood up and gave him a hug. ‘I’ll be absolutely fine. I’ll be better than fine there. You know I will. And you could come and settle me in and make sure I’m okay.’

  Mike was still looking uncertain about the whole thing. ‘Now, I don’t want you getting any ideas about working there. If I do let you go, it’s for total rest, okay?’

  ‘Okay.’

  ‘You won’t be taking the laptop.’

  Audrey gasped at that.

  ‘No laptop, Audrey, I mean it.’

  ‘But you’ll let me go if I don’t take the laptop?’

  ‘And if you report in to me each day.’

  She grinned. ‘You make it sound like I’m on parole!’

  ‘You are, and Harrie’s on my side, you know. She’s going to ring me the minute she thinks you’re not relaxing.’

  ‘You mean if I dare to get up and fetch myself a drink?’

  ‘Exactly!’

  ‘Can we go today? I mean, right now? I’d better go and pack!’

  ‘I’ll pack,’ Mike said. ‘I don’t want you sneaking any gadgets into your luggage.’

  ‘As if I would!’

  ‘You most certainly would. As soon as my back was turned, you’d be filling your suitcase with paperwork.’

  Audrey rolled her eyes at him, secretly loving that he cared so much.

  Harrie had been sitting by the swimming pool when Mike had rung. She’d been watching her daughter swimming laps, her body sending perfect ripples into the turquoise water of the pool.

  When Honor got out, Harrie handed her a towel.

  ‘Mike just rang. Audrey’s coming back.’

  ‘Really? Is she okay?’

  ‘Mike made me promise to keep a careful watch on her. I think he’s still really worried.’

  ‘I bet he is.’

  ‘She’s always had a habit of overdoing things and working until she’s physically broken,’ Harrie told Honor. ‘Even at teacher-training college, she took on the running of so many after-school activities that she had no time left to recuperate from the day’s teaching and was left writing up the next day’s lesson plans in the early hours. She really ran herself down. Lisa and I both warned her at the time, but you know what Audrey’s like when she takes on a new project – it’s always head first at a hundred miles an hour, and I don’t think she’s slowed down over the years!’

  Honor dried her long hair and rubbed her limbs before applying some lotion and settling back on the sun lounger next to her mum.

  ‘What is it?’ Honor asked a moment later. ‘Are you worried about Audrey too?’

  ‘No. Well, a little maybe. But it’s made me think.’

  ‘What about?’

  Harrie pursed her lips and wondered how she was going to say this. ‘I’ve come to a decision.’

  Honor’s eyebrows rose a fraction. ‘Now, you’re worrying me.’r />
  Harrie took a deep breath. ‘I’ve decided not to tell them. I can’t. Not now.’

  ‘What do you mean?’ Honor sat upright, swinging her legs over the side of the sun lounger and facing her mother.

  ‘I mean, it wouldn’t be right. Not with Audrey feeling the way she does. She needs to recuperate. I’ve made a promise to Mike that I’ll look after her.’

  ‘But what about you, Mum? Isn’t this what the holiday is all about? It’s your time, not Audrey’s. She’s a bit stressed, that’s all. That’s nothing compared to what you’ve been through.’

  ‘Stress can be as much of a killer as cancer.’

  ‘That’s rubbish!’

  ‘No, it’s not!’

  ‘But I don’t think she’s in imminent danger, do you?’

  ‘Please keep your voice down.’

  They exchanged a heated look.

  ‘My mind’s made up, Honor. I’m not going to tell them.’

  Honor stood up, looking furious. ‘Well, yours might be, but I could still tell them.’

  ‘Honor! You’re not to tell them anything, do you hear me?’ Harrie cried.

  Her daughter looked full of thunderous thoughts at that moment and Harrie wasn’t totally sure what she was going to do or say.

  ‘Darling—’

  ‘It’s not fair, Mum! This is your time. God only knows you’ve got little enough of it and you told me that you needed to tell them.’

  ‘I know I did, love, but things have changed now.’

  Harrie stood up and reached out to hold her daughter’s hand, encouraging her to sit down again.

  ‘But you’ve been through so much and I just think it’s unfair that they weren’t there for you,’ Honor said.

  ‘But they would have been, you know that.’

  Honor’s lower lip was trembling and Harrie knew that she was on the verge of tears.

  ‘I still don’t understand why you never told them.’

  Harrie sighed. ‘I guess I saw it as a way of protecting them. They didn’t need to be a part of all that ugliness and, believe me, if I could have got away without telling you, I would have done. I saw what it all did to you.’

  Honor shook her head. ‘I was fine.’

  ‘Don’t get upset, darling!’

  ‘I’m not upset! I’m mad. I’m really mad that you’re here thinking about them and offering to take care of Audrey when she wasn’t there for you!’