Cat's Claus

by Dale Mayer

  Cat’s Claus

  Broken Protocols 4

  by

  Dale Mayer

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  About This Book

  Complimentary Download

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Author’s Note

  Complimentary Download

  About the Author

  Copyright Page

  About This Book

  Formerly the fourth installment of the Charmin Marvin Series.

  Charmin Marvin is always thinking, always talking, always learning, always looking for interesting new distractions. After the talking, mega-intelligence enhanced feline inquires when Christmas Day would be in their new timeframe, it sets in motion events that might not make everyone so holly or jolly.

  Charmin’s mistress, Dani Blackburn, realizes that although she’s gained so much, she’s also lost some things she loved in being brought forward two hundred years in the future by her husband Levi’s slightly abnormal, genius brother Milo.

  All holidays were banned from society by the government long ago. Though he hates to deny his beloved anything, Levi has no idea what Christmas is until he does a little research that makes him wonder if they can find a way to return the festive miracle to their small family, if nowhere else.

  The best of intentions for a wondrous celebration of peace on Earth and goodwill toward mankind quickly becomes very complicated in world that doesn’t always know the sentiment, let alone the Christmas spirit…

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  Blood doesn’t just make her who she is … it also makes her what she is.

  Like being a sixteen-year-old vampire isn’t hard enough, Tessa’s throwback human genes make her an outcast among her relatives. But try as she might, she can’t get a handle on the vampire lifestyle and all the … blood.

  Turning her back on the vamp world, she embraces the human teenage lifestyle—high school, peer pressure and finding a boyfriend. Jared manages to stir something in her blood. He’s smart and fun and oh, so cute. But Tessa’s dream of a having the perfect boyfriend turns into a nightmare when vampires attack the movie theater and kidnap her date.

  Once again, Tessa finds herself torn between the human world and the vampire one.

  Will blood own out? Can she make peace with who she is as well as what?

  DOWNLOAD a complimentary copy of VAMPIRE IN DENIAL? Just tell me where to send it!

  Chapter 1

  “When is Christmas?” Charmin asked.

  Dani Blackburn looked over at her beloved orange Persian cat and grinned. It was a little hard to have any respect for his vast intelligence when he was upside down, four paws to the wind and twisted in a bizarre curl.

  “Remember? They don’t do any of those old holidays anymore.”

  “So? That’s them. Then there’s us.” He snorted out a sneeze and flopped over on one side. “And the two don’t have to be the same.”

  Sometimes the darnedest things came out of that cat’s mouth. And where was this all coming from? “Are you missing the holidays?” She quirked her lips and laughed. “You hated the noise, the company. Really howled when I sang Christmas carols.”

  “Ha!” He rolled over to glare at her. “Anyone would howl at your singing.”

  While she was still gasping at his barb, he continued, “I liked the tree, it was fun. Adored the tinsel.” He grinned evilly. “Loved the cookies.”

  She remembered the last Christmas in Technicolor. Charmin climbing up the pathetic fake tree until it collapsed on top of him. The problem of him constantly trying to eat the tinsel and her finding the tinsel and plastic needles everywhere, but the cookies…she groaned out loud. “You used to take a bite out of every one.”

  “I had to see which one I wanted,” he said in such a reasonable tone of voice that she had to laugh.

  “Christmas tree? Tinsel?” Levi, Dani’s husband, who was technically several hundred years older than her, sat down on the chair. She grinned as the furniture stretched and sprawled to accommodate the extra person. That never got old. Her husband, and what a trip that still was, held a mug of something hot.

  “Is that coffee?” she said accusingly. “And you didn’t bring me one?”

  He leaned over and kissed her. “I brought enough to share.”

  “Blech.” Charmin rolled over in such a way that his butt was presented.

  “Charmin, don’t you fire that thing,” Levi warned.

  But gentle snores were already working up and out of her beloved dust ball of a cat.

  “Christmas,” she murmured, images of past holidays floating through her head. She didn’t even know what time of year it was right now. They were currently on a Pacific island paradise. After all the hell they’d been through getting here, she’d wanted nothing more than to crash in peace and recuperate – something that was taking longer than expected.

  Her body still hadn’t fully adjusted to her new surroundings or the atmosphere several centuries in the future. And their trip hadn’t exactly been a fun one – or one she’d agreed to. But Milo, Levi’s genius kid brother, had devised a computer program that snatched her up from the 21st century and dumped her here practically in Levi’s arms as a gift for him. It was a good thing she’d been holding Charmin at the time. Milo had added enhancements for her to be able to adjust to her new life, only he hadn’t known to adjust his calculations for Charmin. As a result, Charmin had been given enhanced communication skills.

  It was something she wished she’d have gotten because not only could Charmin talk, he was a wizard when it came to the latest technology.

  He matched Milo perfectly.

  Affectionately, Dani glanced over at Milo. His massive Mohawk was orange now. She couldn’t help but wonder if it wasn’t to show his solidarity with Charmin. She wouldn’t put it past them.

  “What are you doing, Milo?”

  “Research.”

  “Of course,” she said patiently. “Research on what?”

  She tugged Levi’s mug toward her and took a sip. The one thing they did wonderfully well in this century was coffee. Lord, it was good. Travel was another one. Planes had been relegated to the annals of history as the dirigibles had been in her time. Now they could punch in a code and walk through a portal. She loved that.

  And she’d quickly fallen in love with her new husband. It was early for them though. A honeymoon phase so to speak. Still, as honeymoons went, it was pretty great, once they’d gotten over the attacks, attempted kidnappings, and murders that had arisen after her time travel.

  She smiled.

  “What’s that look for?” Levi glanced at her, his eyes warming.

  She loved that about him. He hadn’t had much long-term relationship experience before she’d landed almost literally in his lap, but he’d blossomed since.

  So had she. She felt blessed to have him in her life.

  Maybe the other two as well. There were only the four of them. She knew a few people she might one day learn to call friends, but as there were many pitfalls in this new life waiting to trip her up, she was hesitant to get cozy with anyone. After all, the conversations were limited with her needing to keep her past secret. Then again, she’d also gained some notoriety recently, and many people had heard of her by now.

  How weird was that?

  Cool, too. She’d been transformed fro
m being a number in a city of big numbers to being someone special here.

  She’d still rather trade it all in for the ability to navigate the minefields that awaited her. She didn’t understand the most basic things here.

  “Christmas.”

  Milo’s distracted voice pulled her back out of her musings.

  “Christmas?” She shook her head. “You don’t do any holidays anymore, do you?”

  “No. Too many protests from dissident groups all the time. As the protests became more violent, we had to ban more and more of them. Now they don’t exist.”

  Holidays gave people something to look forward to, something to celebrate. Who in a normal workforce didn’t love the thought of getting an extra day off because the holidays were coming? And the thought of family and friends gathering for Thanksgiving and Christmas, two of the biggest holidays in her time, made her reminisce about the past.

  It was sad in a way. There’d been nothing since she’d arrived here. Families apparently tried to get together on a regular basis, but she could easily see how that would go by the wayside very quickly as everyone’s lives ramped up.

  Both Levi and Milo had decent relationships with their family, but it was distant. Then again, that might have been because of genius Milo’s work. The security around the two men was something else. Milo had a seriously scary brain. When he’d created the time travel program that had hauled her out of her life, he’d created a hell of a mess.

  Now he was working on something else. Genius was to be allowed at all times, as Milo had created some amazing inventions – but genius also needed to be watched. Up until now, it had been Levi trying to keep tabs on his brother, and that was like a hen trying to keep track of twenty chicks. It worked, but not well.

  The thought of missing Christmas put her in a melancholic mood.

  She had great memories. Even alone with Charmin, they’d had fun. She’d put treats on top of the tree and he’d climbed up the needle-covered branches time and time again. Sometimes it worked well and sometimes not so well. They’d always laughed, sometimes cried, but they’d had each other. There’d been Christmas parties at work, too. Yeah, those memories brought a wince to her face, but at least they’d been memorable.

  “What was Christmas all about?” Levi asked, his tone curious.

  “Togetherness,” she said instantly. “Family. Friends. Sharing. Rejoicing in the experience of being alive and sharing what you had with others.”

  She smiled reassuringly at him. Okay, so it was just a little smile, but her lips did twitch, so it counted. Levi worried about her. Always. He was wonderfully considerate. And she loved every minute of it.

  A huge diesel engine kicked in. She glanced over to find Charmin grinning at her upside down.

  She reached over and rubbed his tummy. “You loved the turkey dinners.”

  “And the gravy.”

  She didn’t think it was possible, but Charmin’s grin widened. Then his eyes turned huge. “Is it lunch time? Did I miss lunch?” He rolled over and snapped to his feet. His gaze locked onto poor Levi and if he could have mentally forced Levi to get up and feed him, he would have.

  A side effect of the time travel. Her appetite was not as ravenous as Charmin’s, but now that Charmin had brought up food, her stomach growled in sympathy. Charmin turned to look her way, and his grin widened. He knew Levi might ignore his demands for food, but he’d never ignore Dani’s.

  “Fine, food it is then.”

  “Thanks, Levi.” She accepted the still half-full mug of coffee from him and sat back. Another great thing about her relationship was that Levi loved to cook. In a world of automatic food, it was his hobby. He actually cooked the same way people in her time did. Not her, of course. She’d had a penchant for fast food and pizza, whereas Milo had a preference for those disgusting health shakes.

  She shuddered just thinking about them. She and Charmin had been forced to drink them in the beginning to help them recover. Not fun.

  But now, with Levi looking after them as well as he did, she knew they’d both landed on their feet in a clover patch.

  Life was good.

  *

  Levi wandered into the kitchen to sort out a meal for everyone. Everyone being the three of them. Milo might join them, but he ate like a bird. Charmin, on the other hand, ate like a tiger. So odd.

  Still, he hummed in the space he’d had renovated to suit his needs and pulled out the makings for big thick sandwiches on fresh bread. As he cut the bread, his mind drifted to the Christmas issue. Not only were there no religious or fun holidays like Dani had grown up with, there were no celebrations like she’d mentioned. He vaguely remembered seeing something about the holidays in his history lessons, but not only had that been a long time ago, he’d mostly likely downloaded them and assimilated the information into his brain without considering the significance of it. As it had no relevance to his life at the time, he had stuffed it back into the deepest memory banks. Now, he not only wished he’d paid more attention, but he was wondering just what he’d missed out himself.

  His childhood hadn’t been lonely per se, but it hadn’t been overwhelming with love and fun, either. He’d taken over Milo’s care at an early age after their parents’ death. That had taken all the fun out of his life. Milo even seemed to have stopped his mental development at the age of sixteen. And that took a lot of patience. With Dani having joined their tiny family unit, Milo had mellowed out and fallen into line in many ways, even accepting the feminine rules without argument. Dani even convinced him to join them for meals so they could have family time.

  Levi hadn’t really understood what that meant, but he cherished the time she’d carved out for the four of them. Yes, he included Charmin in that group. Good luck keeping him out. They did have to work on his manners though. Dani tried, but any time she got distracted, he’d sneak food off her plate and scarf it down before she had a chance to stop him. Even when Levi doubled his portions, he would still pull the same tricks. As a result, Levi had dialed down the portions – much to Charmin’s disgust. Even now, he could feel those huge golden orbs locked on his every movement as he made lunch. There was an egg salad in the fridge he’d made yesterday. It was an old-fashioned recipe with pickles in it. He’d had to scrounge those from a specialty shop, and it had cost a fortune.

  At least he had one of those. And as long as Milo continued to devise the wild and wonderful things he invented, that wasn’t going to change anytime soon.

  “Dani, Levi is daydreaming again.”

  Levi shook his head at Charmin’s not-so-subtle way of saying he was slow at bringing food to the table. Dani might be working on his manners, but there was a lot of improvement left to be had. He grinned.

  He and Milo had both lived a bachelor lifestyle, and wow, had that changed.

  In a good way – at least for him. He glanced over at his kid brother to see him muttering like crazy over his screen.

  Levi frowned when he realized that the screen on this side of the monitor had been blacked out so no one could see what he was doing. Studying his features, Levi figured he was just deep into his research and turned back to making lunch. Bringing out a fresh pineapple that he’d paid an exorbitant price for, he quickly prepped it and portioned it out.

  “Dani said she’d trade her egg salad for my pineapple,” Charmin piped up with a hopeful look.

  Levi just shook his head. “I wasn’t giving you pineapple to begin with.”

  “Then I’d better be getting more than my fair share of egg salad,” he groused.

  Levi was grinning like an idiot – how had his staid, stressed, overworked life become this combination of loving, laughing lifestyle instead?

  Just lucky, he guessed.

  “Milo, come join us, we’re sitting down to eat.” Levi said as he finished plating the food.

  “Be there in a minute.”

  Levi walked to the table and held the plates up until Dani made it to her seat. Otherwise, Charmin – who was
precariously balanced on his back legs – would have tried to take the bigger plate.

  When it was safe, he placed the plates down and took his own seat.

  Minutes later Milo joined them, one of his nasty all-natural green good-for-you-if-you-can-get-it-down concoctions sitting in front of him. He caught sight of Milo’s gaze and followed it back to the opposite side of the table.

  He stared in horrified fascination as Charmin tore into the pile of chopped eggs on his plate. Bits and pieces were spilling off his chin and back onto his plate, much of it falling onto the surrounding table.

  Even Dani stared.

  Charmin finally noticed. He lifted his head, surveyed the mess, rolled his eyes, and tried to clean it up a little. Then as if he realized he was just going to make more of a mess, he shot them a dirty look and went back to eating the way he’d been eating before.

  “Just one big happy family,” Levi murmured.

  “And aren’t you blessed?” Dani laughed.

  “I so am.”

  Chapter 2

  Later that afternoon, after a dizzying amount of schoolwork, still elementary level, Dani’s mind once again wandered in the direction of Christmas. It wasn’t like she couldn’t do without it, but it would be nice to have a few of the better things from her old life incorporated into her new one. Christmas was one of them. But she didn’t need the trappings of the old holiday to make a day to celebrate. She wasn’t sure she needed the same date. That was nostalgia talking. They could just pick a day and have it then. Then again, she wasn’t sure what day Christmas would equate to today. She supposed the computers could tell her. Hell, those things could tell her what the weather had been in the city she’d been born in on the day of her birth. Not to mention every other demographic piece of information that was available.

  The idea percolated in the back of her mind. She wouldn’t have to make a big deal out of it. And she wasn’t sure Levi or Milo would be on board with such a concept, but Charmin would love it. And as she loved him, maybe, just maybe, she could make it happen for him.