Rocking Thin Ice

by Z. Allora

  The bastard reeked of alcohol and sweat, but Drake asked, “What guy?”

  “You know, he showed up sophomore year. Super smart, like an incredibly hot nerd.”

  “Incredibly hot nerd?” That confirmed Dixon’s lack of sobriety. He shouldn’t be driving.

  “Yeah, you remember. Steward Fudson? He had longish hair, always tangled, and the kindest amber eyes… like real soulful and shit… and his mouth….” Dixon’s voice sounded weird and wistful somehow.

  “The one you used to pick on?” Drake had vague memories of the kid—intelligent and really nice. Where was Dixon going with this?

  Dixon stuffed his hands into his pockets. “I didn’t… yeah, him. He wore his hair like you do now. So long you could pull it, and he’d make these cute little whimpers—” Dixon wobbled and then lunged mouth-first at Drake.

  What the fuck? He tried to step back, but Dixon held him in place.

  Dixon’s mouth plastered against his, kissing him.

  Fuck, what was happening? Was this an alternate universe? Drake tried to pull away.

  Grabbing Drake’s shoulders, Dixon clung. He even tried to part Drake’s lips with his tongue.

  That was it. Drake shoved him away. “No, Dixon. Stop. You’re drunk.”

  “And I’ll thank you to take your lips off my boyfriend.” Blaze’s voice had a sharp edge.

  Dixon stopped his alcohol-soaked mouth from going back for Drake’s lips. He glared at Blaze. “Why? He’ll never be faithful to you, so you should get used to it.”

  Blaze folded his arms over his chest, and when Dixon didn’t fill in the blanks, he asked, “Why do you think Drake is unable to have a monogamous relationship?”

  “As beautiful as you are, he’s bisexual.” Dixon enunciated Drake’s sexuality like he proved evidence of a crime.

  Blaze gave him his are-you-stupid smile. “I don’t think you understand what bisexual means.”

  “Whatever.” Dixon wiped a hand over his mouth.

  “No, not whatever. Definitions matter. Bisexuality means you’re attracted to two genders.”

  “Ha, we’ll see how faithful he is when he’s back on tour.” Dixon scoffed and started to stumble away.

  Drake ignored the asshole and grabbed Blaze’s hand. “Thank you for not thinking I would—tour? What the hell are you rambling about, Dixon? You got me tossed out of the band with your stupidity.”

  “Don’t play dumb.” Dixon clenched his fists.

  Blaze tilted his head and stared at Drake like maybe he was drunk.

  Why did both Blaze and Dixon look at him with expectations that he knew what the hell Dixon was referring to? “What tour?”

  Dixon turned and scoffed, “Do you really not know?”

  “Know what?” Strangling Dixon would get him into trouble, and he didn’t want to cut his hair for jail.

  Blaze cupped Drake’s face and turned it toward his. “Is this why you haven’t mentioned it?”

  “Mentioned what?” Drake only had a couple of drinks, so he wasn’t drunk, but what?

  “Midnight Shadow’s tour, it’s all over social media,” Blaze explained.

  Dixon folded his arms over his chest and meandered back toward them. “Apparently your media cleanse was a bit too thorough.”

  “Shut up, Dixon.” Drake stared at Blaze.

  “Wait, you really don’t have any clue about the band? Summer Simpson made a huge apology to you. She fired Frank and this dumbass who can’t keep his lips off my boyfriend.” Blaze gave Dixon a rather scary glare.

  What the fuck? Had he been that much off the grid?

  “Well, I’ll leave you to your fuckery.” Dixon turned and hurried down the hallway.

  Drake cupped his hands and called out, “You’re not driving, are you?”

  Dixon stopped but didn’t look back. “Nah, the bridesmaid I’m fucking did, and she’s a vegan nondrinker or some shit,” and then he continued on down the hallway.

  Blaze stared at Drake with big eyes. “You really didn’t know? How could you not know?”

  “I didn’t want to think about reality. Tay tried to bring up the band once or twice, but I nixed the discussion, and he respected that. My parents never mentioned anything, but they aren’t on social media unless they are looking for pictures of me. I didn’t want to deal with anything but being with you. Do you think the band called or texted?”

  Pointing to Drake’s cell, Blaze chuckled and advised, “Check.”

  Wow. “Twenty-five missed calls and a ton of texts.”

  “Listen to a message,” Blaze suggested.

  Drake put the message on speaker phone. “Hi, Drake. It’s Summer again. Look, I’m super sorry Frank acted like a dick to you. I didn’t know about any of it until I got back into town last week. I don’t know if you got my last messages, but the band fired Frank, and when Dixon tried to justify what Frank had done to you, we got rid of him too. Please call me back.”

  He stumbled over to the chair and sat down. The band wanted him back. Drake stared at Blaze as if he might have the answers.

  “Is this why you didn’t bring up anything after the wedding?” Pieces were falling into place, and Drake could fill in the blanks, having learned how Blaze’s mind worked.

  Blaze shrugged and sat down. “I thought you knew about the band and weren’t saying anything. By not talking about it, I thought you were sending me a message. I didn’t know what to think, other than you didn’t want to share it with me.”

  Drake couldn’t believe Blaze and he were that stupid, but there it was. “So of course instead of asking me about it—newsflash, I love you.”

  Blaze’s eyes widened. “You what?”

  No more skating on thin ice. It was time to rock reality. “I love you. I’m sorry if that scares you, but that’s all my cards on the table. I want no more confusion between us.”

  Blaze stood, yanked him out of the seat, and pulled him close. He tugged Drake down so he was in kissing range and pressed his lips against Drake’s. He delivered the sweetest, softest kiss in history.

  Drake’s toes curled as the affection wound its way through his body and into his heart.

  When the kiss ended, Blaze whispered, “I must like you a whole bunch if I can enjoy your lips even with Dixon’s homophobic and biphobia flavoring on them.”

  Drake couldn’t be disappointed Blaze hadn’t said “I love you” back, because for now the confession of “like you a whole bunch” was a huge win.

  He grinned and went with “Do you really taste him?”

  Blaze chuckled. “No, not really… only in my head.”

  “Let’s go into the bathroom.” Drake pointed at the door a few feet away.

  Blaze purred, “Oh? Hand jobs in the bathroom?”

  Shaking his head, Drake clarified, “There’s mouthwash in there.”

  “Oh, right, fancy hotel, and probably an attendant,” Blaze mumbled with a frown.

  Drake didn’t want him to think he wasn’t interested in anything and everything Blaze could come up with to do, but not in a bathroom. “But later.”

  “Yeah?” Blaze’s smile would win any competition. His smile made him sparkle brighter than all the stars in the sky.

  “Definitely… anything you want.” As they walked into the bathroom, Drake added, “Not for nothing, but thanks for not thinking I would willingly kiss Dixon.”

  Blaze rolled his eyes and did a quick spin, showing off all his best bodily assets. “I may have some insecurities, but I do think highly of myself in some regards. You choosing Dixon over me… not in this lifetime.”

  “Taylor would have liked seeing you put Dixon in his place about bisexuality.” Hmmm, maybe I should speak to Taylor about pansexuality, because that’s a more accurate account of where my attraction falls. Or maybe queer might be the best label—not the time.

  After he and Blaze used the urinals, washed their hands, and used the mouthwash, they headed back to the reception.

  The band played “Flightle
ss Bird, American Mouth” by Iron & Wine. Drake led Blaze onto the dance floor. He’d never slow danced with a man before, but when Blaze spun into his arms, nothing had ever felt so right.

  He was breathless by the way Blaze didn’t exactly follow. They partnered each other, flowing from spinning to stepping in perfect time with the music and each other.

  Blaze asked, “Isn’t this the song in the prom scene from Twilight?”

  Drake smiled at the memory of Blaze curled up in his arms, enthralled by the vampires who sparkled in the sunshine. There were so many gaps in Blaze’s experience, and Drake happily guided him. “Yeah, it’s also in a later movie we haven’t watched yet.”

  “I look forward to watching the rest with you.” The words fell from Blaze’s mouth without hesitation.

  Drake fought down the excitement that skittered through him over Blaze mentioning doing something together after the wedding. He breathed a sigh of relief that his “I love you” hadn’t put distance between them.

  He pulled Blaze close, moving to the haunting melody. Staring deep into Blaze’s eyes, knowing he’d never get tired of this or Blaze, Drake knew in his heart of hearts he never wanted this to end.

  As the song finished, Taylor danced over to them holding a frosted sugar cookie. “Since you were MIA, I saved you guys one.”

  “Aw, thanks, Taylor.” Blaze nabbed the cookie and held the treat up to Drake’s mouth.

  Drake bit into the sugary sweetness and chewed. He took the cookie from Blaze and fed him a bite.

  Once Blaze swallowed, he kissed Drake gently on the mouth and then proclaimed, “It’s not cake, but you should know we have the potential to be very happy together.”

  Taylor slapped them both on the back. “You two need to stop being so cute, or I’ll have to think about finding Mrs. Right instead of Ms. Right Now.”

  Drake chuckled. “You’re such an ass.”

  “Yeah, yeah. The reception is almost over. You guys going to see the fireworks afterward?”

  “Fireworks?” Blaze asked as he guided Drake’s hand to his mouth and took another bite of the sweet.

  “Yeah, West Haven has the best Fourth of July weekend fireworks in the state. It’s a huge celebration.” Drake ate half of what remained, then held the last piece out for Blaze, who took the rest of the cookie with a grateful smile, and gently licked his fingers clean of crumbs.

  After swallowing, Blaze commented, “But it’s not July Fourth.”

  Drake nodded. “Happens on July third here, which is why Jasmine picked this venue.”

  “Easy access to the beach,” Taylor finished the explanation. “And I remembered to bring shorts, T-shirts, and flip-flops.”

  “Really? Color me surprised.” Drake teased because Taylor was notorious for forgetting the basics.

  “You’re welcome. Okay, it was your mom and mine who reminded me about six times, but it sounds better if I take the credit. I did remember to pack the shit into my trunk.”

  Blaze grinned. “You totally get credit, Taylor. Thank you. Though I still need to thank your mom and Drake’s.”

  After a few more dances, the reception ended with the bride and groom kissing and hugging the guests, their parents, and siblings before fleeing to the beach in T-shirts with Just Married scrolled on the front and matching shorts.

  Drake, Blaze, and Taylor changed, leaving their fancy clothes in Taylor’s trunk.

  “Blaze, enjoy the fireworks. D, I’ll text you later.” Taylor slapped them both on the back and meandered off, probably heading to find his latest conquest.

  “We can cut back through the reception hall for the quickest way to the beach.” Grabbing a blanket from the deck of the venue’s patio, Drake led Blaze onto the sand to a place away from the crowd. With Blaze’s help, they laid out the blanket, using their flip-flops in each corner to keep it spread open in spite of the breeze.

  Blaze crashed down and leaned into Drake.

  Drake could hear the wheels turning in Blaze’s brain. “What?”

  “Don’t know whether it’s the drink or you, but freedom and independence used to be really important to me. I didn’t let anyone get close. And now, well, things have changed because of you.”

  The first fireworks streaked into the air and burst.

  “What do you mean?” Drake had been almost afraid to ask.

  “You fit me.” The next explosion reflected in his eyes.

  Drake combed his fingers through Blaze’s hair. “I really do love you. I know you probably think it’s too early to say that, but I do. This has been the best month and a half of my life.”

  Blaze took Drake’s face in his hands and kissed him until he didn’t know whether the fireworks were happening over the water or in his heart. When the kiss ended, Blaze said, “It’s not too soon, because I love you too.”

  Chapter 15

  BLAZE STUMBLED into their hotel room with his mouth attached to Drake’s, needing a bed for their fireworks finale. His heart kept doing triple axels in time with the explosions outside their window.

  “You want to?” Drake asked in between gasps and kisses.

  He didn’t have to ask what Drake meant. Somehow Blaze wanted the connection that being inside Drake would allow. Blaze couldn’t give him words, so he nodded.

  Drake separated his mouth from Blaze’s. “Let me go grab a shower.”

  Reality started to seep in, but Blaze tried to sound normal. “Sure.”

  He fell onto the bed, back first, but bounced off, hurrying to sit in the chair across the room. The shower started.

  He glared at the pristine all-white bed that mocked him. The turn-down service had tucked away the fussy decorative pillows, the white duvet had been folded down, and two bottles of water and a chocolate lay on each of the nightstands.

  Was he one orgasm away from the end with Drake? That was insane, but old beliefs died hard. Their relationship didn’t have to be at the end, right? Drake hadn’t purposefully not been talking to him about the band; he hadn’t known…. But he’d be going on tour.

  This was actual boyfriend seal-the-deal intercourse. Shit! What was the agreement they were signing up for, and more to the point, what the hell did he even know about any of this?

  He usually found a guy on a hookup app, met at their location, and screwed. Sometimes the random guy arranged for the door to be unlocked and the stranger was already bent over the couch or bed, waiting for a cock to arrive. No real names were ever exchanged, and sometimes there was no communication other than body language, a butt thrust toward him, or an escaped sigh. Then Blaze would walk away, sometimes without even talking.

  The anonymity had been sexy in the beginning. A power trip for Blaze that someone he didn’t know wanted to be fucked by him… but now?

  That wouldn’t be what this would be like. Right? Of course not. This was Drake.

  But what if fucking ruined everything? He’d never gone beyond the fucking with the hookups, although emotionally he’d gone all the way with Drake and then some. He’d said he loved him, and screw everything if he didn’t mean it with all his heart, but—

  Drake stepped out of the bathroom in a towel.

  Panic ripped through Blaze. “Um, I’m going to take a shower too. I got sweaty dancing, and well, I’ll be right back.”

  He escaped into the bathroom. Dammit, why was this a big deal? It shouldn’t be. They’d sucked each other off every day, sometimes three times a day. Also given each other slow, delicious hand jobs while they watched movies. So fucking him didn’t have to be huge.

  They loved each other. They were boyfriends… but for how long?

  Trying not to hyperventilate, he turned on the water and stepped into the shower. Shit, he hadn’t even been this nervous when he touched Olympic ice for the first time.

  This was just sex….

  His heart screamed this was so much more. Anything with Drake took on an importance he’d never experienced before.

  Why had he confessed his love? He turn
ed the pressure cooker of crazy to maximum.

  He soaped, rinsed, and dried off.

  After smelling the shorts and T-shirt he’d worn on the beach, he pulled the still clean clothing on. He needed the protection. Then he brushed his teeth and his hair.

  Well, he couldn’t stay in here all night.

  A mostly naked Drake sat in the middle of the bed with his guitar. When he looked up, the smile he gave made Blaze feel like he could do twenty quads in a row, which was weird since he couldn’t move.

  Drake set his guitar aside and met him in front of the bed with a heart-stopping kiss.

  Fear skittered through Blaze. He took control of the kiss and dragged his lips to Drake’s ear. “Maybe we should wait.”

  “For?” Drake asked and started licking along Blaze’s neck.

  “I don’t know. You must be tired.” And he really didn’t—

  “Are you afraid to fuck me?” Drake guided him back toward the bed.

  “Why would you think that? I’ve fucked tons of guys.” That wasn’t bragging, simply a fact, but still gross to say it like that. “I mean—”

  “Then why haven’t we screwed? We’ve done everything else. Blaze, talk to me.” Drake’s voice transformed from teasing to more understanding concern.

  Blaze hated the sympathy and couldn’t look at him for fear he’d see pity in Drake’s eyes.

  “What’s going on?” Drake grabbed Blaze and ran his fingers through Blaze’s hair.

  Unfair! Drake had learned early on that playing with Blaze’s hair sent shivers of pleasure through him, which turned off his resistance. Thankfully, there was only empathy and understanding in Drake’s gaze.

  Blaze sighed and confessed his stupidity. “What if we don’t feel the same afterward?”

  “Why would being together like this change our feelings?” Drake dropped his hands to his sides and gave him a bewildered look that made Blaze’s heart ache.

  God, was he this broken? Blaze moved to the window and stared out into the darkness. “I don’t want you to be like all the others.”

  Drake opened the window, allowing the salty breeze in.

  Blaze shivered at the chill, and Drake wrapped his arms around him, making him feel deceptively safe.