Dangerous Games
Page 19
He showered and shaved, and selected the teal silk shirt Luca had told him brought out the blue of his eyes, leaving it untucked over jeans. He wanted to take the motorcycle, but the forecast that afternoon indicated thundershowers, so he opted for the car. Though there were still five hours until Luca’s plane was due to land, Reese headed out the door, whistling an Ed Sheeran tune.
He took a long, meandering route to the airport, playing the radio loud as he drove along the highway. He stopped at a florist and bought a big bouquet of flowers for Luca. He parked in the airport lot and made his way into the terminal, flowers in hand.
He wandered through the airport shops, mindlessly passing the time, too excited and anxious to concentrate on anything. He replayed Amelia’s call in his mind. He’d been too stunned to ask many questions, and she’d hung up before he could get his bearings. She’d said some fairly harsh things, including that Reese was full of shit. She said she didn’t know if he deserved another chance. Reese wasn’t even sure himself. He was still ashamed of what he’d been willing to do to Luca, and what he’d done to various guys over the years with Hank’s encouragement. But he clung to those seven words, I know love when I see it.
He stared at the bouquet wrapped in green tissue paper he still clutched in his hand. They had looked so pretty in the shop, but now they looked garish, the colors falsely bright. What had he been thinking, buying Luca flowers? Amelia had said he’d agreed to see Reese, but that didn’t mean he’d forgiven him. Flowers were too much, too soon. Luca might feel pressured by the offering.
Two women were passing by him. On an impulse, he stepped up to them and thrust the flowers toward them. “Would you like these?” he said, feeling ridiculous. “I—I don’t need them.”
They looked a little puzzled, but the older of the two smiled and said, “Sure. Thanks. That’s very sweet of you.” She took the flowers from him and the women continued on their way.
He walked along the large windows that looked out onto the arriving planes on the tarmac. He wandered eventually into a food court and bought a sandwich and a Coke but he was too agitated to eat. He bought a magazine and riffled through the pages a while before abandoning it. He read through some work emails and jotted down some ideas in his Notes app for some upcoming sales presentations he was working on. He almost bought a fancy box of chocolates in a duty-free shop, but decided it would be much like the flowers. All he really had to offer was himself.
He had no idea what he was going to say to Luca when he saw him. He told himself he needed to be low-key and dignified. Luca was like a skittish colt. If he moved too suddenly, he might scare him away. He rehearsed elaborate speeches in his head. He paced and bounced on the balls of his feet, as fidgety as a five-year-old. Finally, somehow, the hours passed and Luca’s plane pulled into its gate.
Reese waited in the terminal by the exit where disembarking passengers eventually appeared, scanning the faces for Luca. Dozens of people filed past him, some moving into the arms of waiting friends and families, others scurrying by, heads down, on a mission. None of them was Luca. Where was he?
Finally, one of the last to emerge, he saw Luca’s mop of thick, dark hair and his heart rose into his throat. Luca looked up at that moment and their eyes met. He came to a full stop as he stared at Reese. Reese, too, remained rooted to the spot. He’d forgotten how to breathe.
Then Luca began to walk again. He moved toward Reese, a small, shy smile appearing on his handsome face. Reese grinned back, smiling so hard his face hurt. As Luca came closer, he forgot his promises of self-restraint. Moving forward, he reached for Luca, pulling him into a tight embrace. Tears filled his eyes as he breathed in Luca’s unique scent. Unable to help himself, he nuzzled his nose against Luca’s neck. “Oh, god,” he whispered. “Luca. Luca. Luca. You’ve come home.”
Luca stood stiffly for a moment, but then his arms rose tentatively around Reese and he hugged him back. But he was the first to pull away. Stepping back, he looked at Reese. “I didn’t know you’d b-b-be here. How did you know I was c-c-coming back?”
“Amelia,” Reese said. “She called me on your cell phone. Told me to get my ass down to the airport.”
“Oh, geez, I should have known,” Luca laughed, slapping his forehead. “I love that girl, but she’s such a busybody. What else did she t-t-tell you?”
They began to walk together toward the baggage claim escalators. “We only talked for a minute or two, and then she had to go. But she said something about Julio? That he sent you some kind of email?”
Luca nodded. “Yeah. At first, I thought maybe it was another trick. But this guy, this houseboy, I guess, of Hank’s, he sent this email about you.” They approached the baggage carousel. “It kind of freaked me out. I showed Amelia and she just took over like she does.” He shrugged, almost smiling. “And here I am.”
“Can I see the email?” Reese asked.
Luca reached into his back pocket and pulled out his cell. He swiped at the screen a few times and then handed it to Reese. As Reese read it, his mouth fell open in disbelief. There was a lot more to Julio than he’d given him credit for. He handed the phone back to Luca. “I’m so sorry, Luca. I can never apologize enough. I won’t ask you to forgive me. I’m not even sure I can forgive myself. I’m just so glad you came back. I have no right to ask anything of you. I just want to say one thing.”
He drew in a breath and then said words he’d hadn’t said since he was nine years old.
“I love you.”
Chapter 17
They drove along in silence as Reese made his way out of the airport and onto the highway. Reese’s words continued to echo in Luca’s brain: I love you. Luca hadn’t replied in kind, not because he didn’t love Reese, but because he’d been so surprised. He had expected an outpouring of apologies and excuses but those three simple words meant more than anything.
Yet, while he was more ready to listen to Reese than he had been, he was still holding himself back, not quite ready to let things go. Eventually, he said, “S-s-so, it’s really over with Hank?”
“Totally and absolutely,” Reese said resolutely, glancing from the road toward Luca. He looked so handsome, that golden hair, those deep blue eyes, that chiseled jaw. But he looked exhausted, too. Woebegone and drawn, as if he hadn’t slept in days.
Luca felt bad about that, aware he’d contributed to Reese’s angst by refusing to read his texts or listen to his voicemails. Though he knew it was kind of petty, he also felt gratified, in a way. It proved to him that Reese had been hurting, too.
“You guys were together a long time, huh?”
Reese pressed his lips together, his hands clenching tight on the steering wheel, as if he didn’t want to talk about it. Tough. He still had a lot to answer for. If they were going to make things work going forward, Luca felt he had a right to know it all.
“Yeah. Since high school, like I told you before. The relationship grew more and more toxic over the years. I guess I stayed because it’s what I knew. I was used to him and it had become a habit to defer to him in all things.”
Reese glanced over at Luca. “I’m ashamed of what we used to do, Luca. Back when we first started doing these bets, it just seemed like harmless fun. The guys never knew they were being played. I was so shut down emotionally that I didn’t really appreciate how damaging that kind of behavior was, and how objectifying for the other guy.”
Reese sighed. “Hank and I were fucking assholes, basically. On some level, I knew it, but I didn’t have the strength or courage to stop. But it was different with you, Luca,” he added earnestly. “You mattered too much to me to go through with it. I should have told you, though. I should have told you about the fucking bet. I was a coward, afraid you would judge me, and deservedly so.”
“I d-d-did judge you. And I didn’t give you a chance to explain. I believed Hank over you. I’m sorry about that.”
“No, no,” Reese said quickly. “You have nothing to be sorry about. I’m totally to bl
ame.”
They were quiet awhile, and then Luca offered, “It had to be really hard for you, growing up the way you did. You probably never felt safe. You guys were just kids when you met. He’s rich and good looking and into you. I can t-t-totally see how you’d be enthralled by him.”
Reese flashed a grateful look at Luca. “Yeah, at first I was.” He turned back to the road. “But none of that excuses what we did to those guys over the years. What we—what I—did to you.”
“But you didn’t actually do it to me, did you? I understand that now, Reese. When things got real between us, you told him you wouldn’t go through with it. I’m glad Julio sent me that email. I want to m-m-meet him and thank him.”
“I want to thank him, too. And to thank you, Luca, for reading the email.”
“It’s a g-g-good thing Amelia stepped in,” Luca said with a wry grin. “I was just s-s-sitting there reading the damn thing over and over, with no clue what to do next. She’s always been b-b-bossy,” he added with a laugh.
“She’s clearly a great friend,” Reese said. “We’re lucky she intervened. I’m lucky you decided to listen.”
“Yeah,” Luca agreed. “I was too s-s-scared to trust you. When I listened to that recording, it’s all I could think about.”
“That stupid memory stick,” Reese said bitterly. “I should have known he’d record the bet. He’s pulled that shit before.”
“Yeah, but he said you’d gone through with it. Or he implied that and I just assumed. I b-b-believed Hank over you, which is nuts.”
Luca blew out a breath, determined to be honest, not only with Reese, but with himself. “I’ve always let the other guy take the lead in any relationship. I’ve placed myself beneath them, thinking that’s where I deserved to be. I told you a little ab-b-bout Tom and how casual he was about fidelity. But I’ve been thinking about it a lot over the past couple of days. He t-t-told me right from the beginning who he was, b-b-but I ignored it. I chose to make him something he wasn’t—something I don’t think he’s even c-c-capable of being. And then, when he didn’t live up to that, I let it destroy me. I ran away. That’s why I moved to Denver. But I understand now I was really running from myself.”
“If you needed to run, I’m glad it was to Denver,” Reese said, placing his hand on Luca’s thigh.
Luca looked down at Reese’s strong, beautiful hand and put his own over it. “Me, too.”
~*~
Reese drove to Luca’s apartment. Luca hadn’t replied when he’d said those fateful three words in the airport, but neither had he run away screaming. He wanted to pull Luca into his arms and kiss him forever, but he still wasn’t entirely sure where they stood.
He carried Luca’s suitcase in for him and set it down in the bedroom. Luca came up behind him and put his arms around Reese. With a gasp of relief and longing, Reese turned to face him, his heart beating fast.
As they kissed, they moved toward the bed. They fell to the mattress, mouths locked together. Reese felt himself coming back to life, rejuvenated with vitality and joy as Luca’s tongue explored his mouth.
Luca was the first to pull away, but as Reese reflexively reached for him, Luca shook his head. Reese saw that spark of power in Luca’s eyes and the sub in him responded with a grateful sigh. As he lay back against the pillows, Luca ran his fingers over the curve of Reese’s forearm, his touch sending shivers of pleasure and aching desire directly to Reese’s cock.
He moved his hand, slipping it beneath Reese’s shirt and resting the palm flat against bare skin. Desperate for him, Reese reached toward him, but Luca shook his head. “No, Reese,” he said, his voice a low, seductive purr. “I’m in control.”
Yes, oh god, yes.
Reese watched hungrily as Luca unzipped Reese’s jeans and dragged them, along with his underwear, down his legs. Reese’s cock sprang out, fully erect. He groaned with pleasure as Luca’s fingers closed around it.
Luca met Reese’s gaze, his pupils dilated, his lips parted. “Take off your shirt,” Luca instructed, still holding Reese by the cock.
Reese lifted himself from the pillows and pulled his shirt over his head, tossing it aside. Gently but firmly, Luca pushed him back down until he was lying flat. He took the head of Reese’s throbbing shaft into his mouth.
Reese groaned again. “Luca. Oh, Luca,” he breathed.
Another chance. Luca was giving him another chance. His heart swelled with gratitude and love. As Luca continued to suck his cock, all thoughts slipped away. It was good. So, so, so good…
“Oh, Sir,” he finally groaned. “I need to come.”
Luca pulled away, his eye glittering. “You will not come until I say so.”
This command hardened Reese’s cock into a rod of steel, while at the same time making him want to instantly spurt. But he just nodded, his eyes fixed on his sexy Dom.
Luca took his shaft into his mouth again, not stopping until his nose was pressed against Reese’s pubic bone. Then he slid back, his lips and tongue working as he moved, driving Reese nearly insane with pleasure. Just when he was about to come, no matter how hard he tried to stave it off, Luca relented and released Reese’s shaft from the perfect suction.
Gently, expertly, he licked and suckled Reese’s balls, snaking his tongue along the sensitive perineum until Reese was trembling with need.
“Please,” he begged, “I need you.” He wasn’t even entirely sure what he meant by that. He needed that hot mouth again on his cock, yes, but he needed so much more than that. He needed Luca’s absolution. He needed his love.
Luca lifted his head. “I want you,” he replied throatily. Reese could feel his power and his desire. “You belong to me.”
“Yes. Oh, yes,” Reese breathed, tears of relief mixing with fierce desire. “Yes, Sir. Please.”
Luca rose from the bed and stripped. He looked incredibly hot, with his sexy hairy chest and thick, hard cock, every bit as erect as Reese’s own. Luca grabbed a condom from the drawer and rolled it quickly over his shaft as Reese watched hungrily. Tube of lubricant in hand, he crouched between Reese’s legs and squeezed some lube onto his fingers and the head of his sheathed cock.
His soulful eyes fixed on Reese’s face, he rimmed Reese’s hole and then inserted two fingers. As he pushed the fingers in deep, he leaned up and over Reese to kiss him again.
“Who do you belong to, Reese?” he asked in a low, sexy growl.
“You, Sir,” Reese whispered, his cock throbbing.
Luca nodded. He withdrew his fingers and replaced them with the fat crown of his cock. Nudging forward, he slipped inside.
Reese moaned.
Luca moved inside him in a sensual swivel, the head of his cock rubbing against Luca’s prostate with perfect friction as he stared down into his eyes.
“Jesus,” Reese gasped. “It’s so fucking good…”
Luca moved faster inside him, thrusting in long, hard strokes. At the same time, Luca curled his fingers around Reese’s shaft, sending ripples of pure ecstasy through Reese’s body.
“Oh, god!” he cried, “I can’t, I’m going to, please, oh, oh…”
“Yes,” Luca cried hoarsely. “Do it. Come for me.”
Reese convulsed in powerful spasms, shooting ribbons of ejaculate over his stomach and chest. Letting go of the spent shaft, Luca gripped Reese’s shoulders, thrusting hard deep inside him. His eyes were closed, his head thrust back, the tendons on his reddening neck standing out. All at once he stiffened and then shuddered in a series of convulsions as he came. Still buried inside him, Luca collapsed against Reese, who pulled him tight into his arms.
They lay still for a long time as their pulses and breathing slowly returned to normal. Reese loved the perfect weight of Luca resting on top of him. He was home at last, the first real home he’d had since he was a child. And it wasn’t a place—it was this man, it was Luca. His soul had shattered into a thousand pieces when Luca had left him, but now it had been mended with Luca’s loving touch and forgi
veness. He brought his arms tighter around Luca, a grateful tear slipping down his cheek.
Luca lifted his head from Reese’s chest and said, “Reese?”
Reese smiled up at him. “Yeah?”
“I love you, too.”
~*~
Six Months Later
Reese let himself into their apartment. He opened his mouth to call out to Luca that he was home, but stopped when he heard the sound of Luca’s guitar. He loved when Luca played for him. He had a beautiful voice, and when he looked into Reese’s eyes as he strummed that guitar, Reese’s heart melted all over again.
A few months back they’d agreed it was crazy to keep two places since they spent every spare minute together. They’d found a single-family home to rent in a nice neighborhood within walking distance of Strata, and they were slowly furnishing it together, perusing estate sales, furniture and home goods stores on the weekends. The house had three bedrooms, and they were in the process of turning one of the rooms into a workout space/BDSM playroom. They’d explored more of the BDSM club scene in Denver since their reconciliation, though they mostly preferred to play at home. It was both exciting and deeply satisfying to delve deeper into the BDSM scene together, learning as they went what worked for them and what didn’t.
He walked quietly to the bedroom, where Luca sat perched on the bed, guitar in hand. He was singing the first song he’d ever sung to Reese—The Shape of Your Body—a very romantic, sweet song by Ed Sheeran. His hair had fallen over his eyes, obscuring his face as he bent over his guitar, softly crooning his love song. Reese stood in the doorway watching, his heart swelling with love.
When Luca came to the end of a stanza, he looked up, his face lighting when he saw Reese. “There you are.” He set the guitar aside and rose to his feet, moving to take Reese into his arms.
“I could listen to you all day, Luca. I love your voice.”
Luca, who still wasn’t that good at accepting compliments, though he was getting better, just held Reese tighter. When they separated, he said, “I’m all packed and ready for Austin. I’m looking forward to the trip.”