Existence
Page 19
“You mean my dying? I did that willingly last night. What took you so long? Gee came to my room and she was as confused as I was.”
He smiled at me. “No, not dying, although that sacrifice wasn’t taken lightly. However, it could have been interpreted as selfish nature by the Deity. You see, humans give up life when they can’t deal with the pain. It’s an easy escape for them. The sacrifice I’m speaking of isn’t one of dying but of living.”
He touched his forehead to mine. “You see, Gee was playing her part. She knew exactly what was happening. She isn’t a Deity, but she is an immortal and has been around since the beginning of time. She knew it all revolves around self-sacrifice. A completely selfless act.”
I shook my head, frowning. “What do you mean?” He chuckled and I realized it was the most beautiful sound in the world.
“You chose to live a life you no longer wanted just to ease my pain. You didn’t want to live without me, yet when you knew it would have made my extinction pointless you couldn’t stand the thought. You chose to live for me.” I nodded agreeing with him but not sure how this had anything to do with how he was here in front of me.
“My beautiful soul,” he murmured and caressed my cheek. “When you gave the ultimate selfless sacrifice, it paid for my wrong. You proved to be worthy of my devotion. Of Death’s.....love.”
I touched his perfect lips with my fingers, wanting to kiss him. To be as close to him as possible. “So, because I chose life, you continue to exist?” I asked in wonder.
He nodded. “It actually gets even better,” he said, kissing my chin and then each cheek, causing me to forget what it was we were talking about. His nearness made me weak with pleasure and a soft moan escaped my throat.
“Ah, that sounds wonderful,” he murmured as he ran kisses down my neck and across my collarbone. I clung to his shoulders knowing at any moment I was going to pass out from the pleasure. I felt his warm tongue flick across my skin and I gasped, pressing closer to him, ready to beg for more right there in the schoolyard. He pulled back and his breathing was ragged.
“I get to keep you,” he said, staring at me with an intensity that made me shiver.
“Keep me?” I asked, reaching up to kiss his chin and trail kisses down his perfect neck.
“Not here. I can’t take much more, Pagan. I’m only so strong,” he said in a husky voice as he pulled me against his chest. “You’re mine now. While you walk the Earth you belong to me. Nothing can hurt you.” I heard a touch of humor in his voice. “It’s pretty impossible to hurt what Death protects.” I smiled into his chest, wanting to stay in his arms forever. But there were questions I knew I needed to ask. I could bask in his presence later.
“I can stay with you for eternity then?” I asked, watching him. A small frown touched his perfectly-sculpted mouth.
“Not exactly. You’re mine as long as you walk the earth.
Your body will grow old and old age isn’t something we can stop. One day you will have to leave this body and begin a new life.”
“I will grow old and have to leave you and then what? Start a new life where I won’t know you? Will you wait until I’m old enough and then come see me? No. Dank, NO! I don’t want to do that. I want to keep you forever, all the time.”
Dank cradled my face and stared into my eyes. “Pagan you’re a soul. You must live the eternity souls are given. You don’t get a choice. The fact I can love you and protect you while you live on Earth is a gift I hadn’t even dared to hope for. This is all we can have. I’m Death; I am a Deity. I am not and I have never been a soul. I take cold souls or souls whose bodies have died and send them to the place they have earned. I was created for this.” I shook my head, wrapping my arms around him as if he would disappear at any moment.
“I want to be immortal. I want to be with you always. Isn’t there anything you can do?” He shook his head sadly, and then stopped, glancing over my shoulder with an angry scowl.
“Leave, Gee, this isn’t your business.” His voice dripped the cold ice that only Death could muster. I turned and Gee stood nearby with one hand on her hip, smiling like she had just won a contest.
“Ah, but I don’t care. That’s the beauty of it,” she said brightly and stared at me. “He isn’t telling you all there is to know because he thinks your mind is too fragile to understand the complexity. Don’t let him off so easy, Peggy Ann.”
Dank snarled behind me. “Don’t call her that.”
Gee grinned and winked at me. “Okay, fine. Pay-Gan”
I glanced back at Dank., “What is she talking about, Dank, tell me. I’ll do whatever I have to so I’ll never leave you. I don’t want to grow old. I want to remain as we are now, forever. I’ll go wherever you go. Please.”
Dank sighed, slipped his hand around my waist and squeezed. “I’ll tell you one day. When it’s time. There is a way but, Pagan, it isn’t easy. It requires giving more than you could ever know. The choice has never been made and for a soul it would be impossible. Souls are handicapped by their emotions which are much too weak.”
Gee cackled from behind me. “Souls are supposed to be weak emotionally but that one isn’t weak at all. Give her a little credit. She just made a choice no other soul could or would have had the power to make. Her soul is uncommon or you would have never made it yours.”
He gazed at me and smiled gently. “I know.” The warmth in his eyes made the rest of the world fade away.
“See ya around, Pay-Gan,” Gee called from behind me. I hated looking away from Dank’s gaze but I did in order to tell Gee bye. She was already gone.
Dank let out a frustrated sigh. “If you didn’t like her so much I would make sure we never saw her again.”
I stiffened. “What? No.”
He grinned. “Relax, Pagan, she’s safe from my wrath. She makes you smile and she cares about you. That makes her forever safe and treasured.”
I smiled and ran my hand through his dark curls. “So, Death, what do we do now?”
“For starters you need to go break things off with Leif and I’m going with you.”
The idea of breaking Leif’s heart was bad enough. The guilt was eating me up inside at the thought of hurting him. I shook my head and gazed pleadingly up at Dank. “Please let me do this alone. You can’t be there, it will only make it worse.”
Dank’s expression remained unyielding. “I’m sorry, Pagan, but I can’t let you do this alone. He isn’t who you think he is. I don’t trust his reaction.”
I smiled at Dank’s belief that he needed to protect me from Leif. Leif was harmless. He’d be broken but not dangerous.
Dank stood up, placing me on the ground in front of him and slipping his hand in mine. “Pagan, I’m not sure how to tell you this, but... Leif isn’t human.”
Table of Contents
Existence
Existence Copyright © 2011
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
-buttons">share