The God Wheel

by Brian Clopper

  Herena offered a suggestion. You should really check on your family. I think I figured out what’s happening with the queen and her army.

  “What? Tell us,” I said, annoyed that it seemed like the dragon was trying to sidetrack us.

  Yolla said, “There is the danger that someone you care about could be harmed, even killed. Prophecies are always rather vague about death.”

  I wagged a finger at the goddess. “Are you telling the truth or making stuff up as you go? I’m beginning to think there’s really not a prophecy and you just say things to steer me to where you think I should go next.” I hated losing my cool with her as she’d been the most likeable of my pantheon so far.

  Yolla appeared momentarily hurt, but then I saw determination return. She squinted at me slightly and put her fists high up on her hips. “We want you to succeed. Listen to Herena.”

  We eyed the dragon expectantly.

  I think maybe the army is comprised of those without squires, the ones in a coma like Felix’s dad and Lorna’s sister.

  “That seems like a leap,” I said.

  The dragon appeared nervous. She licked her lips and averted her eyes. You have to trust me. I know what she can do. This is within her capabilities.

  I looked at Lorna. Something was off. The dragon wasn’t being forthcoming. “What aren’t you telling us?”

  I’ve said what needs to be said.

  Well, actually mentally projected, but that was me splitting hairs. I truly needed to stop that. Bisecting follicles had never gotten me anywhere. I chuckled inwardly at my word play but then refocused, suddenly fearing the dragon might be able to read my thoughts and be disappointed in my distractive tendencies. I snidely added, “At this juncture.”

  The dragon turned away and shared nothing more.

  Yolla gave Herena a sympathetic look.

  Did she have an inkling what the dragon’s deal was? Did my pantheon socialize enough when away from the wheel to know each other’s secrets?

  “You have to tell us, eventually. I know there’s more.” Lorna walked over and gently touched the dragon’s left wing.

  Herena pulled the slightly folded appendage away from her.

  Lorna ignored the evasive move and returned her hand to the wing, stroking it gently.

  This time, the dragon didn’t recoil.

  Chapter 17

  A Parent Problem

  We checked on Lorna’s sister first. Lorna managed more control with this portal, dropping us in her sister’s kitchen. She rushed over to the couch.

  Wendy was still there, in the exact same position, really. Lorna removed the Beats headphones hanging from her sister’s outstretched arm, tucking the limb under the couch pillow to make her more comfortable.

  Yolla said, “You shouldn’t have a bracelet that can take you anywhere.”

  “Well, I do.” Lorna didn’t even look at my goddess. “Maybe it’s that way because the prophecy says so.”

  Yolla grew quiet.

  Herena drifted over to her host.

  Lorna studied her sister’s face. “There’s a faint yellow glow coming from her eyes.”

  I leaned in to see. Sure enough, despite being closed, there was indeed a glow seeping out from under her eyelids..

  “So why hasn’t she hopped up and walked through a portal?” Lorna briefly made eye contact with the dragon before scanning the room, scoping out whether or not a rift sat waiting to be put to use.

  I did the same.

  Nothing. No portal.

  Perhaps she summons her army in waves. The fact that your sister’s eyes radiate that light isn’t a good sign. She is dormant until being called to service.

  A chill ran down my spine.

  Lorna didn’t move. She was considering her next move. Eventually, she stood. “Felix, we need to take her to my parent’s place. They can stop her from doing anything stupid if a portal shows.” She touched her bracelet and spawned a rift over by the pantry door. “We can bring your dad there, too.”

  I gently lifted her sister from the couch. Lorna went through the gate first. I followed, with our gods bringing up the rear.

  ****

  Lorna didn’t mess around at her parents’ house. We appeared in their living room. Both were asleep in recliners with the television on. I checked my phone. It was almost one at night. We’d been coasting on adrenaline so long, that I hadn’t noticed how late it was.

  She directed the gods to hide in the garage. They quietly left.

  I eased Wendy onto the couch as Lorna woke her parents.

  They were freaked out at Wendy’s comatose state, but Lorna eventually got them calmed down. “Mom, Dad, you can’t let her get up and leave through a portal.”

  I fully expected them to give her questioning looks, but they didn’t.

  Her dad pointed at the television. “We saw that. Like an hour ago. They ran footage of people waking up and walking through holes in the air. That’s insane. What’s going on?”

  Her mom fretted over Wendy, placing a wet washcloth on her forehead and stroking her hair. “Something’s wrong with her eyes.”

  Lorna drew up next to her and gripped her mom’s hands, cupping them within her own. “Mom, you have to be strong. Felix and I don’t have time to explain, but there’s bad stuff happening. And we’re in deep.”

  Her mom flinched and slipped her hands free to adjust Wendy’s compress.

  “Honey, what do you mean?” Her dad shot me a look.

  Lorna stood, grazed her fingers over her bracelet while holding it up for her family to see, and triggered a portal. It flickered into being to the right of the television, which had a reporter running a clip of a portal as well.

  Lorna’s parents gasped. Her mom pointed at her bracelet. “How’d you . . . ?”

  “It’s magic. You have to believe me. We’re going to fix this. Felix and I know what’s happening.”

  “We’re bringing my dad here,” I said. “He’s in a coma, too. Please look after him.”

  Lorna’s dad met my gaze. “Of course.” He gave Lorna a hug and kissed the top of her head. “Please play it smart.”

  She said, “I will.”

  Lorna hopped through the dimensional opening, and I chased after her.

  Once again, we were running off without our deities in tow. As much trouble as they’d been so far, I couldn’t help but feel a little naked without them. I wondered if Lorna felt the same.

  ****

  We lucked out, and Dad was still in his bed. We brought him to Lorna’s parents. After breaking it to them that a portal could appear and to do everything to stop Wendy and my dad from stepping into one, we left through the garage. Lorna had the sense to keep her parents from seeing our deities. Neither seemed aware we had fetched my dad without them. If Lorna didn’t tell them, I certainly wasn’t going to.

  We ducked into a portal and exited in Lorna’s god wheel.

  She nodded at me. “Do it. Put your hands on it.”

  I did, and the wheel exploded, throwing me backward. I was prepared and didn’t let myself crash into the cave wall.

  The wheel began spinning furiously.

  We both agreed it made no sense to wait around for the god wheel to fix itself. After all, mine had taken at least five hours to return to working order. We went to my house. I walked Marty. The dog couldn’t get enough of the dragon. Herena went upstairs to get away from my retriever’s constant attention. Yolla eventually joined the dragon. I gave Marty a rawhide, and he settled down in his dog bed for a long gnaw. I left his crate door open as he had been cooped up too much already today.

  Lorna was the first to sprawl out on the couch. I joined her, drawing my arms around her as we settled in. She turned on the television in case the Entropy Queen showed herself to the world. After half an hour and no mention of her assembling an army out in the desert or of a sudden invasion of a heavily populated city, we turned the sound down. Eventually, we fell asleep, our bodies giving in to exhaustion.


  Lorna’s cell phone woke us up.

  “What is it, Mom?” She slipped off the couch and began pacing.

  I watched her expression go from concern and confusion to horror.

  “We’ll be right there.” She ended the call and froze in place.

  “Lorna, what is it?”

  “They woke up, both of them. A portal appeared. My dad tried to stop them.” Her voice hitched. “He couldn’t.”

  “Oh my god.”

  “They’re gone. The queen has them.”

  I stood and opened my arms. She crashed into me, buried her face in my chest, and sobbed. I hugged her tight, doing my best to hold back my own tears.

  Marty raced up to us, hopping about at our feet and wanting to contribute his hyper affection. His barking brought Herena and Yolla downstairs.

  When the deities arrived, we separated, regaining our composures.

  The divine didn’t ask. Somehow I sensed they knew what had happened.

  I glanced at the kitchen clock. 9:47 in the morning. “We need to go to your wheel.”

  “I want to save Wendy,” Lorna said, a distant tone to her voice.

  “We will, but we need Mitch and the others.” I expected pushback from our deities, but both held their tongues. Or cerebral telepathic organs, in the dragon’s case.

  Yolla called up a portal. Remembering how rough her dimensional travel had been, I hesitated.

  The goddess noticed. “Don’t worry. I gave you the works the first time through. I wanted to impress. I can do a much simpler dimensional transfer, promise.” She grinned.

  Lorna sailed through the rift with Herena close behind.

  Marty lunged at the gateway. I almost didn’t catch him in time.

  As I escorted the retriever to his crate, Yolla said, “You are doing the right thing. Herena is caught up in tradition and resists employing the exiles because she has close ties to the powers that be. What do you expect, though? She used to be one.”

  “What?”

  “She wouldn’t want you to know that yet, but I thought you should be apprised.”

  So that was her secret. But it didn’t explain how she was somehow linked with the queen.

  Yolla eyed the portal. “Come. Lorna’s probably wondering what the hold-up is. Maybe confess to a quick potty break.”

  I stepped through the portal, giving the goddess a withering look.

  Chapter 18

  Future Troubles

  Lorna’s wheel was in proper working order. It hadn’t taken as long as mine to reboot. She manipulated her god wheel with determination.

  It landed on her scratched-out god. None of the letters were legible.

  Herena disappeared. I hated to see the goddess go without confronting her. I sensed that it would have to happen eventually. She wasn’t being wholly upfront.

  The three of us were once again transported to a plateau. This time it wasn’t Mitch’s. That made sense. We’d been brought to Lorna’s exiled god.

  Wearing a light brown robe, a shadow creature stood staring at us, his face a hazy black cloud featuring two glowing eyes, vertical nostril slits, and a mouth lined with sharp teeth. The creepy thing was he’d already been facing our way and smiling when we’d hopped out of the portal, as if expecting us.

  “About time you losers got here.” He pointed at a nearby plateau. Mitch stood atop it, waving in our direction. “What took you so long? Have you weenies no urgency about the end of the world?”

  “Um, well . . .”

  The god slapped my knee, which made sense as he only came up to that height. I was glad he hadn’t tried to hit me any higher. If he’d really extended himself and added a leap, he might’ve been able to tag me in the stomach. “Both rhetorical, pal. Can’t you suss out insincerity when it slaps you in the face, chief?”

  I didn’t respond. I grinned and rubbed my knee. Truth be told, there was no way he could reach my face.

  He scowled and kicked dirt at me. “That one I wanted you to answer.”

  The god squinted at me, waiting.

  When he started tapping his foot and eyeing my shins in a way that could only be described as kick-happy, I rushed out an answer, “Normally, yes. You’re a little hard to read, though.”

  He rolled his eyes and lost interest. He walked up to Lorna and wagged a finger at her to draw closer.

  She dropped to one knee and leaned in, bringing herself nose-to-flattened nostrils close. “You’re with me.”

  “But of course.” He gave me a nasty side-eye. “Never any doubt the quality person I’d be associated with. This place makes things a little cloudy, but I remember you well, Lorna Wesson.” He inspected her hands. “It is still Wesson, right? No one’s put a ring on you yet, have they?”

  She smiled. “No, still free as a bird.” She winked at me.

  The god caught it. He smacked himself hard in the forehead. “No, no, no. You can’t possibly be entangled with this nimrod? Say it ain’t so.”

  “Let’s save the world first and then worry about who’s officially with who after,” she said.

  “Yeah, I get it. All business with you. Guess you need my services, huh?”

  “Not really sure what you do,” she said.

  I suddenly realized the creature’s misstep. “How’d you know the world was ending if you can’t communicate with Mitch? For that matter, how’d you know his name?”

  “We were acquainted with one another from before the powers that be locked us away in here, cretin. Worked the god wheel of a cyclops together. It was short-lived. The poor sap never saw the death pit coming. I don’t shoulder any blame with that one. I wasn’t manning the wheel at TOD.” He grinned. “As to knowing the world was facing an end, I’m highly deductive. I figure you two forcing your way in here, which is supposed to be impossible, must mean things are desperate out there.”

  “Oh.” That was a reasonable answer.

  “Also, I’m one of the rare deities that can actually access my sphere of divine influence.”

  “Which is?” I asked.

  “Call me Vardislek, god of portents.”

  “What’s that?” I asked. I thought I knew but wasn’t sure.

  “You can see into the future,” Lorna said.

  “Yes, and I can really help you along your path. My readings are sometimes specific but often kind of general. Perhaps a demonstration, milady?” He bowed.

  “Proceed,” she said.

  The little god crossed his arms and scrunched up his face. Tendrils of shadow wiggled upward from his head, like dancing, gravity-ignoring dreadlocks.

  Everything around us suddenly appeared as if in negative. I flinched, but then we reverted to normal a second later.

  Vardislek doubled over and wheezed. He kept one arm pressed against his stomach as he looked up at the two of us. His eyes widened, and he stiffened. When he spoke, his voice was monotone, robotic. “A death of a close ally the first time through but not on the do over.” He rubbed at his eyes and shuddered.

  “What does that mean?” I asked.

  “Open to interpretation. I’d give you another, but I need a little recharge time.” Vardislek gently patted her knee. “Just so you know, dear Lorna, I like to mix things up. Never the same species twice. You were my only mortal. Worked my way through a lot of magicals over the centuries. You got a lot to live up to. My last gig was with a noble pegasus.” He drew his hands together and pressed them to his chest as he drew in a breath and struck a reminiscent pose. “That was so long ago.”

  “I’ll try to make you proud.” She stared at Yolla and me.

  I wasn’t sure how helpful Vardislek was going to be. He certainly liked to talk. We needed to move forward. No telling how much time we had before the queen put more lives in jeopardy. I didn’t want to think what the military response would be to fending off a crushing army of zombified citizens.

  I said, “We want to bring all of you back and enlist you in stopping the Entropy Queen.”

  The little g
od shivered. “Ugh, her? Really? Lady gives me the creeps. And my portents get a little slippery where she’s involved, for some reason.”

  “So what do we need to do? Summon portals for all of you and bring you across?” Lorna looked out at the numerous plateaus and their accompanying prisoners.

  “Well, the logistics of that would be massive, and possibly doable. But that’s not going to work. You got a much bigger task ahead of you.”

  “Which is what?” Lorna said.

  “The powers that be have a barrier spell erected that keeps us from leaving our rock towers, talking to each other, and skipping back over to the real world. Good news is the originator of that spell is housed in this very dimension.”

  Lorna put one hand on her hip and narrowed her eyes at the god. “And the bad news?”

  “The spell goes away when you kill Big Ernie. And when I say big, I don’t think you truly appreciate the magnitude of Ernie’s vastness.”

  Lorna and Yolla stared at me, both aghast.

  Chapter 19

  Temple Twister

  I stared up at Vardislek’s rock formation. We stood at its base, actually on this dimension’s ground.

  “This is stupid! We don’t have time for a side quest,” I said.

  Lorna started forward, not even looking back to see if I was following. “It’s not. We have to do this to free these exiles.”

  “It just seems like a distraction, but I trust you.”

  Yolla said, “I’m actually excited. I’ve heard of Big Ernie. He’s quite powerful.”

  “Um, how is you fawning over the jailer here helpful in the least?” I said.

  “You have nothing to worry about, Felix.” The goddess gave me a quick side hug. “You have me. Things will turn out. You will land right.”

  We continued walking, weaving past a dozen plateaus. We couldn’t see any of the deities atop the formations; they were too high up. Even the shortest looked to be hundreds of feet tall.

  Vardislek had gone into extensive detail about our foe before we’d traveled by portal to the surface.

  Expect a lot of tentacles, he’d said. Breathe through your mouth or else you’ll gag from the stench, he’d urged. Massive elder gods that disagreed with the rules of time and space didn’t employ the best hygiene practices, hence nose-breathing being off limits. The annoying god had dwelled on the odor at length, even suggesting if we took too deep a whiff it might result in gruesome death through olfactory means.