The Paradox

by Lola StVil

  “Yes, but I have been working on my stern face to show you how displeased I am with you disappearing for hours and coming home late. Like, another day late.”

  “Wow, that sounds like a lot of work. Is a hearty breakfast part of the package, because if it is, I think you might need to brush up on your definition of a stern face.”

  I cram some eggs in my mouth and chew furiously. He’s making me more and more nervous by the second. He can’t seriously be going to make a joke of this and not punish me at all. If I keep my mouth full and busy, maybe I won’t have too many snide remarks for him, because let’s face it, they’re not helping.

  “It was. I missed an episode of Cake Boss.”

  He doesn’t do serious. Mom always did this part better. She was the scary one. Poor Dad, he doesn’t stand a chance.

  “Well, since you worked so hard on it, let’s see it,” I say, still shoveling food in my mouth.

  He sticks out his chin and narrows his eyes, looking down at me with them. It takes all of my power not to laugh at his goofy face.

  “Wow, impressive, Dad. Almost believable.”

  Crap, my tone is definitely not as lighthearted as I intended. Instead I sound as sarcastic as I look, I’m sure.

  “Thank you,” he says, crossing his arms.

  I pushed him too far and he is finally getting angry. When he gets angry his Adam’s apple has a vein that ticks away, and his neck to his ears gets fire engine red, like it is now.

  “Does that face come with any kind of punishment? Or is it more like a preview for the next time I mess up?”

  I’ve pushed it this far. I might as well go all out and get it over with.

  “It’s a preview but it comes with a verbal warning. Now I am thinking about tossing in a punishment for your attitude this morning, young lady.”

  I shake my head.

  “I’m sorry, Dad. I didn’t sleep well.”

  His expression softens, and I feel bad about my sarcastic comments. I feel even worse for the lies I’ve told him about where I was yesterday. But it’s not like he’d believe me if I told him the truth.

  “Biscuit, I was terrified that something happened to you. The only thing that eased my mind was knowing that unlike New York, we are now in a small town and it’s relatively safe. However, the same rules apply. We stay in touch with each other. We don’t just disappear for hours without so much as a phone call. Is that clear?”

  “Yeah, Dad. I’m sorry.”

  “Good. And while I’m glad you made friends, you still have a curfew. And you will be in this house when you are supposed to be or you will be grounded. Am I understood?”

  “Yes, but I told you I had no cell…”

  “Sailor Vivian Monroe. Do you understand me?”

  “Yes. I do.”

  “Good.”

  We glare at one another for a moment, until I look away. It’s one thing to have endured that look from Mom, but from my dad? I can’t have him angry at me. He’s all I’ve got now. Dad gets up and comes around the table.

  “Honey, I’m so proud of you for making friends so quickly. I just want to make sure you are safe,” he says as he wraps me up in a hug.

  I relax into it. After Mom’s death, we kind of grew apart. Hugs are a bit of a commodity these days. When he pulls back, there are tears in his eyes.

  Not the waterworks, Dad. I can’t handle it when you cry.

  He stares into my eyes, a faraway look in them.

  “You look so much like her. Your mother,” Dad says, his voice soft but laced with sadness.

  I swallow against the lump, but the waterworks and his voice are almost too much and I look away. In the corner of my eye, I see his head turn away too and his breath breaks as he inhales deeply, catching at the back of his throat. He’s fighting really hard not to break down in front of me. I have to give him props for it.

  “Come on, let’s finish breakfast and we can be a few minutes late today,” I offer.

  Dad smiles, walking back to his seat. His pancakes are really good. It would be a mega shame to waste them. After that, our conversation turns to lighter topics, thank goodness. Eventually, with a full stomach, I head for the door. I stop, remembering Loki’s bag of food sits nearly empty in the pantry.

  “Hey, Dad,” I call back to the kitchen. “Don’t forget to pick up a bag of dog food on your way home today. Loki is almost out.”

  “Okay,” he shouts back.

  “And don’t worry about unpacking. I will get started on that as soon as I get in from school.”

  Dad’s head pokes around the corner.

  “No, no. I got it. If you want to see your new friends after school, by all means go see them, just remember what we talked about. Check in, and be home on time. Okay?”

  “Okay. Love you, Dad.”

  I start to go out the door but he stops me.

  “We’re not going to be just a little late now, Dad, we are going to be like, really late.”

  “I know, but Biscuit…” He pauses, looking around the room like he needs to find the words.

  “Tell me something about these kids you hung out with, are they nice?”

  They are something alright.

  “They are...interesting,” I reply.

  I shouldn’t have said that.

  “Interesting how, Sailor? Are they doing drugs? Did they offer you drugs? Maybe I should meet their parents,” he mumbles.

  “Bye, Dad,” I say and wave, closing the door behind me and shaking my head.

  He’s unbelievable. I take one step and run into something, or more accurately, someone.

  “Sunday?”

  I peer over his shoulder and a meek Mel waves at me with a soft smile.

  “The Four Horsemen don’t look like that,” Sunday says bluntly.

  “Uh, what?”

  It’s too early for this. How am I supposed to translate Sunday at this ungodly hour? I almost laugh at my pun thoughts and the irony in them.

  “The ogres in your nightmare. That’s not what the horsemen look like. The fact is, the horsemen are in hiding until the planetary alignment. So, they have taken on a different form. One could look like a nice old man. One could be a teenager or even a child.”

  I know my eyes are bugging out, but I can’t help it. They bum-rushed me when I haven’t even had a good cup of strong coffee.

  “Can we back up here? How do you know about my nightmares? I haven’t even told my dad the truth about that.”

  “I know because I was there.”

  He replies casually as if dream walking is a normal thing that everyone does.

  “We’re gonna be late for first period. Walk and talk,” he says.

  Mel skips gleefully beside him. I am still standing on my steps, mouth open, staring at them in shock and confusion. Seriously, my dreams aren’t even safe now?

  “Hey, wait up,” I call out to them and jog to catch up.

  “Who said you could just enter my dreams? And by the way, that, my dear dream invader, is what we humans call a nightmare. Dreams are when you are happy and nightmares are when you’re being mauled by a thousand angry demons.”

  “I walk in and out of dreams undetected. I can affect it if I want but generally, I try to stay out of the way,” Sunday notes casually.

  His cool demeanor annoys me further.

  “Okay, I don’t like that. I mean, you shouldn’t have access to my private dreams and nightmares.”

  “Hey, it’s no picnic for me either. Do you have any idea the horrors I’ve seen in the human subconscious? You have no idea what nightmares really are.”

  “Then why do it?” I push.

  “I don’t go around walking into everyone’s dream. In fact, I try to avoid it. But I had my orders.”

  “Who ordered you to invade mine?”

  “Rye. He feared you’d have nightmares and would need a Hook Light. A Hook Light is the light you saw in your dream. I manifested it by gathering your wants and desires, and I used them to create
that light. It’s hard to make a Hook for someone I hardly know.”

  His brows rise and he gives me a pointed look. It’s safe to say we aren’t on the best of terms.

  “I thought you said you guys all got a flash of my life,” I reply.

  “Yes, but dreams aren’t driven by events, they are driven by longing and fear. The team knows what happened in your life but we don’t know how you feel about those events or what your secrets desires are. And that’s what I need to create the Hook and blast your nightmares away.”

  “But you did that. So, what did you use to make the Hook Light?”

  “I used something that I knew you wanted but weren’t ready to admit you wanted. Something that gave you a flood of euphoria and headiness.”

  “Okay, and what was that?”

  “I used your feelings for Rye.”

  Mel gasps and chuckles. “Oh my god, they would make a cute couple.”

  “No, no. You’re wrong. Your light shouldn’t have worked if you were gunning for my feelings for Rye.”

  “Why is that?” Sunday stops and faces me head on.

  “Because I hate him,” I mutter.

  I know that’s not true as soon as it leaves my lips and I feel the color rise from my chest up to my ears.

  “If that were true, the light would have failed. But it didn’t. Instead, it grew and it saved your ungrateful butt.”

  He turns and stalks on. Mel smiles apologetically and skips on after him.

  Oh no. Before the nightmare, I was kissing Rye. Did Sunday walk in on that too? When I finally manage to reach Sunday and Mel again, I grab his hand and turn him back to face me.

  “Are you going to tell him? What you saw in my dream. The part where I kissed him?”

  Mel sucks in a breath again and with each reaction from her I want to slap her that much more. Sunday scoffs and then grins in triumph.

  “You didn’t see that part, did you?”

  I am mortified. He shakes his head and touches my hair.

  “I should tell him, you know. How you feel, what you just admitted. If nothing more than to see you get all worked up about it.”

  Now I want to punch him, but his face softens again and he grows serious.

  “But that isn’t what I was sent for. My job was to make sure you were protected from your dark thoughts. I did that. How I did that can be kept between us,” he says kindly.

  I breathe easily, and instantly regret my dark thoughts about Sunday.

  “Thank you,” I whisper.

  Just as I am feeling better, a shadow, shaped like a bony claw, pokes through the earth at my feet. It closes around my ankle. I scream and reach for Sunday. His and Mel’s eyes are both wide in horror.

  I’m too far away to grab Sunday and I am thrown back, the sky above me filling my vision for the briefest moment, and then dirt, fire, and darkness surround me...

  I know it’s kind of a cliché to be screaming as you’re falling down a seemingly endless pit to nowhere, but I guess I am cliché. I’m pretty sure there should be all kinds of roots and rocks but there aren’t any snagging on my clothes or cutting my arms. Maybe I should be thankful for that? I don’t know. It’s cold, dark, and I am still falling, into an endless void of darkness.

  Of course, when I was first sucked into the earth, I thought for sure I would be burned by the fire that engulfed me and that creepy-ass hand. Nope.

  Now, I just wish I had a little of that light to help me see what I am tumbling toward. Or who.

  “Help!”

  Good one, Sailor. I am sure the good ol’ pit monster will “help” you. I can’t help it. I’m really freaking out. I’m really starting to think I’m not cut out for this kind of shit. If I was, I would be accepting all of this as normal, taking it in my stride. And I am far from doing either of those things.

  “Help! Somebody! Sunday? Grace?”

  Seriously, why have a bunch of hot gods in your pocket if you can’t summon them by name?

  A soft orange glow comes into view and I sigh, but before I can clear my head, the rest of the air is torn from me as my bottom hits a hard surface. Ow. Still panting from the hell of a ride I just took, I stand on shaky legs and pat the dust from my jeans. As soon as my hand touches my ass it’s wet and goopy.

  “What the…,” I say, turning awkwardly with my ass poked out to see what is coating it—some kind of Middle Earth mud sludge.

  “Oh, hello,” a voice says, startling a squeak from me as I jump back.

  Whirling around, ready to meet my newest foe, I am not prepared for who is standing right in front of me. Some old witchy grandma lady. Of course, I can’t see her face, but she’s hunched over, holding a glowing orange staff, and wearing floor-length robes. Over her face, she has a very thin but definitely concealing scarf. Honestly, how much more can she scream witchy grandma lady?

  She tuts, only reiterating the whole grandma connection.

  “You sure do scare easily, human.”

  I have to get out of here before grandma decides to pull a Hansel and Gretel on me.

  “Yeah, well, I did just get sucked down a hole, flung through all the layers of the Earth, and spit out here before Grandma Gingersnaps. By the way, please don’t eat me. I swear I won’t throw you in the oven.”

  She stares at me, and her mouth opens a pinch. I know because her lips make a very distinct “O” against the silky fabric covering her face.

  “I have no interest in eating you, Sailor.”

  “How do you know my name?”

  I take a step back and reach into my back pocket, but my knife isn’t there. One, I was walking to school, and two, I haven’t touched it after that whole demon in the woods thing.

  “You know, it doesn’t matter. Look, I don’t know who you are or what you want, or even why the hell you sucked me down here, but one thing I do know is you are going to tell me.”

  The hooded woman cocks her head to the side and I try to hide my annoyance. It has to be a nervous reaction, because I am seriously a mixed bag of pissed and scared at the moment, but granny here doesn’t need to know that.

  A loud crack rings out like a gunshot and I cover my ears, hitting the floor.

  “Okay, okay, what the hell!”

  Mystery granny’s staff twinkles at its orange tip. Little sparks of light spill down to the floor, puffing out like the fallen ash from an incense stick. Oddly enough it smells a bit like sandalwood and frankincense.

  “Enough of this foolery, Sailor. Come closer. We have much to discuss.”

  “I think I will just stay right where I am. You still haven’t given me your name or stated why the hell you abducted me. You know my friends will be looking for me, don’t you? My dad? They will be swarming this place any minute now with police, SWAT, the military, you name it.”

  “I highly doubt it, but I digress. Child, I don’t have long to play your games. I need you to listen to what I have to say. As for your questions, you are right. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Nexus. I believe my friends have filled you in about the Avos?”

  I nod my head. Okay, so she’s a friend of Rye and the gods. Why the hell didn’t she just approach me on the street like a normal person and tell me that?

  She grunts, shifts to one side, and claps both hands on the staff as if to hold on for support.

  “Then you ought to know I am one of the few immortal ones.”

  Damn. That explains the old lady bit.

  “Seems like a horrible way to exist. An eternity of watching everyone grow old and die.”

  “I was sworn to help the last remaining gods by providing guidance to the Paradox,” Nexus states, sweeping her arms out.

  I notice her robes are kind of ragged. Giant holes like in a slice of Swiss cheese are nestled in their thin folds. If I were going to spend all of eternity down in this pit of doom, I’d at least have some new clothes sent to me every now and then.

  “Good, because I have no idea how to pull this off. Like, where do I even start? How
do I actually kill the Four Horsemen? How—” I start.

  Nexus holds out one very knobbed old finger. Its color isn’t very lively.

  “No, dear. No time for that,” Nexus says.

  “My team will reveal all the finer details of the how and when in good time. But right now, we have other things to discuss. Something that will determine the fate of all.”

  Trust me, lady, I am wrapped up in all the fate of all currently. Hit me with your best shot.

  “Okay then.” I shrug. “Though, I can’t see how figuring out ahead of time how to defeat my enemy doesn’t directly impact the ‘fate of all’ and kinda take priority here.”

  I’m pacing and thinking as she watches me. Now I know how animals in cages feel.

  “This quest to stop the end of the world can be done with a guide or without. Trust me, without is far worse and bloody.”

  Oh, so she’s threatening me now? Well, I didn’t see that coming. Okay, I kind of did when she pulled me through the earth at 80 mph.

  “Okay, so you’re here to guide me?”

  Yes, it’s obvious and she already said it, but honestly, the woman is talking in circles. Cut to the chase already, Nexus.

  “No, I’m here to see if you are worthy of guidance. If you pass my test, I will help you and your team; however, if you fail my test? Well you are on your own. Alone, that is, apart from your team, and given the situation with Rye, it’s doubtful he and his team will be much help.”

  “What situation?”

  She cackles, which feels like a slap in my face. Nobody seems to want to tell me anything straight to my face in this business. It’s starting to really piss me off.

  “That’s not in my job description, sweetie. Ha. You could always ask him yourself!”

  She’s still laughing and I am not really sure what’s so funny.

  “Seriously? You are gonna be like that? Drop a bomb like that on my head and not tell me? I have rights you know. Like, if I am working with some mass serial killers, or maybe they are false gods and actually demons, either way, I deserve to know. So, tell me. Pretty please?”

  Now is the time to pout and beg like a puppy for a bone. Nexus stops laughing, but it echoes a minute more.

  “No.”

  Exasperated, I toss my hands in the air and huff.