The Cruel and Beautiful Series Boxset

by A. M. Hargrove

  “I shouldn’t be long.”

  We walk down a hall that isn’t as sterile looking as the hospitals I’ve been in. The walls are paneled in a medium wood grain color and have colorful pictures of puppies and kittens on them, making the place look much more cheerful than it is. The glass fronts of patient rooms are bright with hanging blinds that can be opened or closed for privacy. The hallway is large and there are only rooms on the one side.

  “Wait right here.”

  We stop on the opposite wall from a room where a little girl lies in bed. “Tasha” is written on a white board outside her room.

  I nod and try to breathe through the anxiety. It all rushes back to me despite how everything looks different.

  “Doc Drew,” a nurse calls before he can enter the room.

  Her hair is blonde and swings around her shoulders as she bounces over to him.

  “I thought I wouldn’t get to see you today. When I heard you came back, I had to come up to see you.”

  She reaches out, but he holds out a hand and steps back. His face shifts and he almost looks angry.

  “You have stop or I’m going to go to human resources again. I’m not interested. My girlfriend over there can attest to that if you need to hear it from someone else.”

  Andy points at me and I straighten. So this is the girl I saw kissing him. Then who is Becca?

  Her hands fall to her sides. “Fine, you don’t know what you’re missing.”

  She spins on her nurse’s shoes and they squeak in protest. She clomps off and Andy glances up and me and shrugs. I give him a thumbs up and he smiles a little. He glances away from me when a little girl tugs on his lab coat.

  He kneels down to be at her eye level. I’m given a clear view of the small, pretty girl with brown skin and a bald head. She has a pink headband on with a bow. She looks so tiny compared to the IV pole she walks with.

  “Doc Drew,” she says in a tiny voice. “They shaved off the rest of my hair. Do you like it?”

  Andy’s smile couldn’t have been bigger. He reaches up and touches the side of her face. “You are beautiful.”

  Her baldness is another reminder of how Andy is so much stronger than I am. He’s ready to slay the cancer dragon, while I’m ready to be consumed by its fire.

  Her eyes dip. “You think so even without my hair?”

  His finger gently lifts her chin. “Absolutely.” Then he leans in and whispers something in her ear.

  She smiles but it doesn’t exactly reach her eyes.

  “Is your mom around?”

  She nods. “She went to get something to eat.” Her face changes immediately. “I’m not feeling so well.”

  “Let’s see what we can do about that.”

  He picks her up like he’s her knight in shiny armor. It’s hard for me to stop the tears from spilling over that well up in my eyes.

  He carries her in one arm and pushes the pole with his free hand. Just as he lays her down, she tosses her cookies all over him and the bed. He doesn’t look disgusted at all. The fact is, he never even blinks, or misses a beat. He calmly reaches for a plastic basin on the side of the bed and holds her while she finishes vomiting.

  Two nurses come jogging over. One has fresh linens and the other takes the girl from Andy while they remake the bed and get her cleaned up. He doesn’t leave her though. He continues to talk to her with what can only be reassuring words. I can’t hear them, but the way he looks at her is telling.

  As they tuck her back in bed, he discreetly takes off his soiled lab coat and rolls it up. He unclips his ID credentials and takes everything out of his pockets before shoving the dirty thing into the linen cart someone brings in.

  Then he sits in bed with the girl and talks to her until her mother comes in. The nurses have left and the mother isn’t the wiser. I have a feeling Andy won’t say anything to the mother about it in front of the little girl. I know I’ve hit the nail when I see him hold up a finger to her and walk out with the mother.

  They talk quietly near the door and I feel like an intruder. Andy speaks softly, probably out of respect for patient privacy and so the little girl can’t hear him. The mother speaks a little louder, enough so I can hear part of her side of the conversation. She’s concerned that the girl can’t keep any food down and “Wasn’t the medication not supposed to make her little girl sick?”

  I want to tell her there are no absolutes in medicine. I knew that first hand. Everyone is different and responds differently. I only hope Andy can give the girl the miracle it appears she needs.

  He goes back in and talks to Tasha some more before he finally comes back to me.

  “We can go now.”

  Tasha’s situation tugs at my heart. I know I shouldn’t ask, but I do anyway. “How bad is she?”

  He places a hand on my back and guides me away from the rooms. Becca and the male nurse are the only ones at the station when we walk up.

  “See ya Doc,” the guy says.

  Andy grabs his coat and waves. Becca says nothing.

  I want to ask about her, but I find myself needing answers about Tasha.

  “You know how things are, Cate. We thought we beat it and we’re doing our best for her.”

  He doesn’t get into details due to patient confidentially. He trails off and I’m left feeling my heart will crush inside my chest. I need to change the subject.

  “Is there something between you and Becca?”

  “Jealous?” He asks turning a charming smile on me, but I don’t cave. He sighs. “I made a mistake when I first came to work here.”

  I’m not sure I want to hear the rest, considering how he begins this tale.

  “She had the SUV. I had some boxes shipped to me. She offered to help me pick them up. Mitch and Dave lived in DC. She was here. I accepted and offered her dinner as payment for her help. She thought maybe I was interested. I told her I didn’t date anyone where I worked. I think she’s held out hope I might change my mind. Now she knows I won’t.”

  I nod at his clinical assessment. At least he realized she was still into him. Some guys act clueless. I can’t be mad at her. Not only is Andy amazing to look at, but he’s a single doctor, thus a catch. If I continue to be with him, I’ll have to curb the jealousy because he will get always hit on.

  When we get to his car, I change the subject yet again. “Why don’t you have a 4 wheel drive?”

  Considering his job, it seemed like a good question.

  He’s buckling his seat belt when he says, “Never needed it in Charleston. And I haven’t decided if I’m staying.”

  “Oh,” I say remembering he’s here temporarily.

  “Hey,” he says gaining my attention.

  I realize I’m picking at a chip on my nail. I need a file or it will break off. I glance up and meet his eyes.

  “It looks like I might have an opportunity to stay in the area.” He pauses to let that sink in. “I want to make this work with you. I’m leaning toward staying here because of you.”

  He takes my hand and kisses my knuckles. Then we are driving back to his place. We don’t talk and I think about what he says.

  “I hope you’ll stay. Not only for me, but for you, too,” I say finally when he parks the car after a precarious drive back.

  He smiles and leans over to kiss me. “That’s good to hear. And this is a great opportunity, so I would stay for all the right reasons.”

  We stay in bed for rest of the day before Mitch shows up late. I got a text earlier that my office is closed the next day, so I snuggle in for the night.

  However, Andy’s office is open the next day. Apparently DC got hit harder. In fact, I get a call from my mother that Charleston got some snow too. Andy goes into the office early, but wants to come back at lunch to take me home.

  “Mitch offered me a ride,” I say into the phone.

  “Yeah man, we’re both headed to DC,” Mitch calls out in the back ground.

  “Tell Mitch I can take care of my girl and to get
his own.”

  I don’t, not yet at least. “He has a point. We’re headed in the same direction.”

  “I’m almost done. Please let me do this.”

  I agree but he almost regrets that decision when they call for freezing rain later in the day. He beats the next storm to roll in while the roads are clear.

  “When will I see you again?”

  “Saturday? I’m going out with Mandy tonight because I’ve been promising her for weeks.”

  “Saturday works. I might hang out with Dave and Mitch tonight. Dave has news he wants to share. Maybe I’ll call you and I can come over for breakfast?”

  He winks at our code word. “I doubt I’ll be out late with Mandy. So swing by when you’re done having fun with the boys and spend the night with me. Then I’ll make you breakfast.”

  It’s my turn to wink before I kiss him hard with the need I suddenly feel. I had him in bed most of yesterday and now I must be spoiled.

  “It’s killing me to leave you. You better go or I’ll have to cancel my afternoon appointments.”

  I kiss him quickly and hop out the car with the biggest smile. However, the night with Mandy doesn’t exactly go as planned.

  Twenty-Four

  Past

  Graduation was yesterday. I’m officially done. I don’t know how, but I attained two degrees and graduated summa cum laude, with Drew watching me. My shining moment is having Drew here, not getting the dual degrees or the summa cum laude designation. Funny how your priorities change when life throws a wrecking ball at your carefully constructed plans.

  “I’m so proud of you,” Drew says, as we put the last box in my car. I spent the last week packing up the apartment with Jenna. The moving truck is full and my dad just left. He and Jenna’s dad are driving it back to South Carolina. Jenna and Ben are following Drew and me home. Drew has to fly back to Indy to finish his last two weeks there before he starts his fellowship at the Medical University of South Carolina in July. He’ll have a month off because of our wedding. His department in Indy has been so awesome to him, I keep wondering if he should’ve stayed there for his fellowship. Too late now.

  Jenna walks out and asks, “You ready?”

  “Yep. Let me use the bathroom one more time.” When I come out, I take a look at our building. “You know, I’m really gonna miss this place.”

  Jenna comes up to me and throws her arm over my shoulder. “Yeah, me too. It was a great apartment and we were great roomies.” We look at each other and start crying.

  Ben and Drew moan. One of them says, “Girls,” and I think it’s Ben.

  Jenna yells out, “Shut it. We were like peas and carrots.” And we sob some more.

  We finally pull apart and head out of town. Drew’s hand reaches for mine and he says, “Won’t be long before we’re headed on our honeymoon.”

  “Yeah and I wish someone would tell me where we’re going.”

  He laughs. He wants it to be a huge surprise, so I’m going with it. I look at him and marvel at how awesome he looks. Strong is the first word that comes to mind. He’s working out again and he looks every bit the same as when I met him. His hair has grown in, though it’s not as long as he used to wear it and it’s a bit wavier.

  “Bathing suits, babe. All you need are bathing suits.”

  “What? No nude beaches?”

  “Probably, but I don’t want anyone seeing your gorgeous body naked. So, bathing suits.”

  I clap my hands together. “I’m so excited. In just a few weeks, I’ll be Cate McKnight.”

  “Don’t say another word or I’ll have to pull over so we can have a quickie.”

  “I think I can help you out with that.” I move to unzip his pants, and take his semi-hard cock out.

  “Cate, it’s broad daylight and traffic isn’t exactly sparse.”

  “Just keep your eyes on the road, McKnight. And try to stay away from any eighteen wheelers.”

  “I don’t believe you.”

  “Say that in a few minutes.” I wrap my mouth around his cock and go to town. There’s just something sexy and a bit edgy about sucking your fiancé off on the interstate. I don’t know why, but it sure turns me on.

  Drew moans and one hand finds its way into my hair, as he slightly pumps his hips up and down, fucking my mouth. I need to make this fast so he doesn’t wreck. I do my best tongue swirling, mouth sucking, hand squeezing, blow job until Drew climaxes, groaning into the car pretty damn loud. After I lick him clean, I zip him back up and offer him a smile.

  “Damn, Cate.” He shakes his head. “That was great.” I notice he’s white knuckling the steering wheel.

  “I aim to please.”

  “Well, you did a little more than please. Shit.” He rubs his face.

  “You okay there, honey?” I laugh.

  “Fuck. I want to kiss you.”

  “Sorry. A man’s gotta drive.”

  He looks straight ahead for a heartbeat, and then impishly says, “Yeah, but a man has a hand.” And he holds it up in the air and wiggles his fingers. It gets a giggle out of me. “Lose those shorts.”

  Suddenly, I’m thinking what he did. It’s broad daylight and traffic is thick. He reads my mind. “Oh, no way are you getting out of this one, baby. What’s fair is fair.”

  I give a quick glance to the back seat and spy a pillow. I grab it and grin. Putting it over my lap, I tug down my shorts. “This is a fair exchange because my head was in the way. Now the pillow will be.”

  “Fair point.”

  His hand slides under the pillow and when he finds my sex, he says, “Someone was totally sexed up from that blow job she just gave.”

  “Of course I was.”

  “Shit, would I like to slide into you right now.” Instead, two fingers move inside of me. He knows exactly how and where to put the pressure, but when he adds the motion to my clit with his thumb, it’s not long before my orgasm bears down on me.

  When he pulls out, I hand him a tissue, and then I start laughing.

  “What’s so funny?” he asks.

  “It didn’t take us long to have car sex on this trip. Gah, are we bad or what?”

  “Just don’t tell Jenna, because she’ll tell Ben, and I’ll never hear the end of it.”

  “I’d never tell Jenna. The only way she’d find out would be if they saw us.” Then a thought hits me. “Oh, shit! They’re behind us. They’re gonna figure it out with my head going down and all.”

  Drew roars with laughter. “Yeah, you’re right. They already know. I’m surprised they haven’t called.”

  “I know why. They’re saving it for when we stop to eat.”

  Drew and I share a glance and we both know we’re screwed.

  Sure enough, we stop for a late lunch and Jenna gives us her rendition of what my head looked like from their car.

  “Damn, McKnight. Could you not at least wait until we got out of town? I mean we were still in fucking traffic!” Ben teases.

  “Dude, who am I to turn down head?”

  “Truth.”

  “Stop!” My face burns red, I’m sure.

  “Your fault, my friend,” Jenna rubs it in.

  “I’m not saying another word.” Drew pulls me into his side, and kisses my temple. “Don’t let ‘em get to you, babe. It was the best.”

  I elbow him in the ribs, before I even think. He winces and I immediately shrink away. “I’m good. Get back over here.”

  I hate myself when I forget and do crap like that. But maybe it’s a good thing I can actually forget at all.

  It’s after midnight when we finally pull into Charleston. I’ll be staying with Drew tonight because we refuse to stay apart from one another. Tomorrow I’ll go home for two weeks, while Drew returns to Indy, and then we’ll move into our house that he bought for us when he moves back to Charleston. It will give us time to get settled before our wedding, which is in one month.

  Letty and Ray greet us with hugs. We’re beat but I can’t believe they stayed up.
>
  “Of course we stayed up. We haven’t seen you two since what, March?” Letty says.

  “It was my surgery, Mom.”

  “You look wonderful, son,” Ray says.

  “I feel wonderful,” Drew says.

  “Are either of you hungry?”

  Drew decides to raid the fridge and I snack on some of his findings. We chat with his parents for a bit, then head up to bed.

  When we dive into the bed, Drew pulls me close and I’m almost asleep. I love the way he feels next to me. It’s like I’ve just taken a sleeping pill.

  “Cate?”

  “Hmm?”

  “I love you.”

  “Oh, Drew, I love you, too.”

  “I know. Thank you for hanging with me.”

  I lift my head to look at him. “What do you mean?”

  “Cancer is a big fucking ticket, Cate. Most girls would’ve run away as fast and as far as they could. But not you. You’re here. And you act like you’re still as excited as fuck about marrying me. Like I’m fucking gold.”

  Tears choke the air that I try to breathe and the words that I want to say, right out of me. So I hold up my finger, indicating to him I have something to say. He knows I can’t do it so he nods.

  I wipe my eyes a few times and swallow, then say, “Listen to me, Drew, because I’m only going to tell you this once. I fell in love with you and that includes the good times and bad. I’m not some shallow twit that runs when things go south. I’m in this relationship for the duration, like it or not. Now you can thank me for whatever, but don’t you ever thank me for hanging with you. This is the real deal. When you love someone, this is what you do. And I love everything about you Drew, the beautiful parts and the ugly parts, and that includes getting rid of the cancer.”

  “I never thought I’d meet someone like you. I’m sorry you have to go through this.”

  What? He’s the one going through it!

  “Don’t be sorry for me. I love you and wouldn’t be anywhere else. Nowhere else. But with you.”

  The light that glows through his bedroom window lights up his eyes and I can see the love shining in them. He traces the outline of my face, brows, lips, and then kisses me. “How did I ever luck out with you, beautiful Cate?”