Dirty Little Secret

by Jennifer Ryan

  “I’m hoping I can help there,” Noah said, wondering if he could fill that tall order.

  “Keep her away from her mother,” Joe advised.

  “She’s that bad?”

  “Worse.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind.” Noah couldn’t imagine worse than what Roxy described. He didn’t want to let his mind go there because he didn’t want to think of Roxy getting hurt. Again and again. “Come on, let’s take these guys down to their new home.”

  Sonya came over and linked her arm through his and stood with him watching Roxy ride away. “I’m thirsty,” she said out of the blue. “Take me up to the house. We’ll have a drink, and I’ll answer your questions.”

  He hesitated for only a second, then walked with Sonya up to the house. They took a seat at the patio table and looked out across the backyard to where Roxy and Annabelle on one of Roxy’s other horses rode in one of the pastures.

  “You like my sister.” Sonya shaded her eyes to watch the two in the field.

  “I’ve never met anyone like her. She’s . . . special. Amazing. Her resilience surprises and impresses me. After all her parents put her through, growing up alone . . .”

  “She had us, me and our sisters, but I know what you mean. It’s not the same as having a loving family. We don’t know what that is or how it feels. What you’ve had here, it’s so foreign to us. To her.”

  Noah acknowledged that with a nod. “I had the life she should have had.” That single thought felt like a lead weight in his bleeding heart.

  “I’m glad you understand. So, what do you want to know?”

  He stared at Roxy draped over Vinny, hugging his neck, her smile bright and carefree. “Everything.”

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  “I hope I won’t see you at the Ranch anytime soon,” Sonya said by way of goodbye.

  Roxy laughed and gave her a hug. “Not until next month. I’m banished to this ranch until then,” she teased.

  “I like your Noah,” Sonya whispered into her ear, because Noah stood five paces away saying goodbye to Joe.

  “I like him, too.” She had let go her anger and resentment over the misunderstanding. “But he’s not my anything.”

  “I beg to differ.” Sonya held Roxy’s shoulders with her arms outstretched. “Despite the obvious tension between the two of you, he’s hardly left your side this weekend. Marry that man, or I will.”

  Roxy laughed at the joke, then caught Sonya’s eye and all the laughing stopped at her serious look. “Sonya, you can have that life. A husband and children, the house and the dog. Stop working so much and start living.”

  “Look who’s talking. And you just added to my work.” Sonya indicated the stack of files Roxy and she had gone over for all her various accounts. “When I find my Noah, I promise, I’ll take the time. You’re lucky. Hold on to him, the way he tries to hold on to you, though you keep slipping away from him. Stop running, or at least let him catch you,” Sonya pleaded.

  “I have a feeling he hasn’t let me out of his sight because he intends to catch me as soon as you’re gone.”

  “I’m off.” Sonya gave her a wide grin, then snagged Noah around the neck and hugged him goodbye. She stepped back and held him at arm’s length. “Thank you for a lovely weekend. You hurt my sister, I’ll hurt you. Believe me, I know people.” Sonya’s teasing tone took some of the sting out of her truthful words.

  Noah laughed and tapped her on the shoulder. “Get lost.”

  Sonya winked, hugged Roxy one last time, and climbed into the truck.

  Joe came to her, wrapped his arms around her, lifted her off her feet, and hugged her tight. “Don’t worry about your other babies. I’ll take good care of them and check on your sisters, make sure they don’t burn the place down while you’re gone.”

  “Thank you for always taking care of me,” she said, and hugged him tighter.

  “Be happy, darlin’.”

  Joe set Roxy back on her feet, shook Noah’s hand, and gave him a nod goodbye.

  Roxy stood, watching her friends drive away feeling the loss of the companionship she’d missed since coming to the ranch. Her throat constricted, and she held back the tears and watched as the truck disappeared.

  Noah clamped his hands down on her shoulders and leaned in close to her ear from behind. The warmth of his body set hers on fire. “I like your sister. She’s really great.”

  “She’s one of my best friends.”

  “I’m sorry, Roxy. More than I can say. I let you down, and that’s the last thing I ever wanted to do. You’ve taught me to never look at someone and think I know them based on a few simple facts or rumors. Please tell me my one moment of stupidity won’t cost me getting to know you.”

  His arms wrapped around her and draped across her chest. She rested her chin on his forearm along with both her hands. Strong muscles corded under her fingers. His body pressed against her back.

  “Honey, please . . . forgive me.” Noah pressed his forehead to her hair.

  “I didn’t give you a chance to work out what I told you and make up your mind. I’m sorry.”

  “I made up my mind when we were in the barn and you were ordering me to sign checks.”

  “I didn’t order you to do anything. I asked. I even said please.”

  He nuzzled his nose along the curve of her ear. “Yeah, I guess you did. Then you tried to get away.”

  “I needed to catch my breath,” she said, frustrated he wouldn’t let her go, but held her closer. “You have a twisted way of remembering things.”

  He pressed his face into her hair. “I remember how you felt in my arms. Just the way you do now. I remember the way you smelled, like flowers in spring. The way you tasted, the softness of your lips, the feel of your tongue sliding against mine,” he whispered at her ear.

  She sank back into him, mesmerized by his deep voice and the warmth that spread through her and pooled in her belly and rippled out to the edges of her being.

  “All you remember is kissing me.”

  “I remember the overwhelming urge to hunt your mother down and kill her for even thinking of harming one hair on your head. My chest hurts just thinking of you in a cottage, ten years old and all alone every night. How lonely that must have felt. I can’t imagine what it took for someone so young to live the way you did with only yourself and your sisters, no older than you, to rely on.

  “I remember the hurt and misery in your eyes when I looked at you and thought something that could never be true about you. I remember thinking I’d rather cut my heart out with a spoon than see that look in your eyes ever again.” His arms tightened around her. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I never meant to hurt you. I do remember that moment we shared, the closeness I’ve never felt with anyone else. I want that back,” he whispered, his lips skimming her earlobe.

  She shivered. Her body responded to the heat in his touch and she rubbed her bottom against his thick erection pressed against her backside. Noah sucked in a breath and squeezed her tight.

  “Every time I think about you, every time I’m close to you, I want you with a passion I’ve never felt for anyone. Tell me we have a chance to explore this connection neither of us can ignore anymore.”

  Roxy turned in his arms and pressed both palms to his chest, her head straight ahead, her eyes on her hands covering that hard expanse of muscle. She felt them bunch and relax as he moved his hands to her back and held her close in the circle of his arms, unwilling to let her move even an inch away.

  “Roxy, sweetheart, you said you’ve always been cautious and controlled. Let go. Take a chance on us. Be reckless with me.”

  Damn if he hadn’t pegged her right. Never one to go halfway, she went all in. Sliding her hands up his chest and rising on tiptoe, she wrapped her hands around his neck and pressed her lips to his. This kiss was nothing like the others. She opened to him immediately, invited him in, and followed him into the fire. Fearless.

  “You kept both the girls to yourself al
l weekend,” Harry said from nearby, “and now you’ve gone and sent one away. At least, you kept the curvy one.”

  Noah went rigid in her arms. His mouth left hers and firmed into a tight line. His eyes narrowed, like an outlaw ready for a fight. “I finally get you alone for a minute and someone has to ruin it.” The disappointment in his tone eased the last remnants of her trepidation even more.

  “You had her all weekend, give a guy a chance. Stop hogging her,” Harry pleaded.

  Noah’s eyes went cold. He shoved her behind him and went after Harry.

  Roxy grabbed his arm before he swung his fist and laid the poor kid out in the dirt. “Noah, wait. Let’s not turn this into some barroom brawl. This is a business. He’s an employee. There are rules and laws for the workplace.”

  Noah stopped glaring at Harry and glanced down at her, an understanding forming between them. “You’re right. I meant to do this last week but got distracted. So let’s deal with this once and for all and have an employee meeting.”

  Harry backed up and eyed Noah as he advanced. “You can’t fire me for talking.”

  “Actually, yes, I can. Get to the stables and I’ll tell you and the others what else I can fire you for.”

  Roxy followed Noah and Harry, who had the good sense to keep several paces ahead of Noah and out of his reach. Roxy felt the restrained rage coming off Noah, but she respected him even more for handling this the right way and not punching Harry in his smart mouth even if he deserved it.

  Noah whistled for the guys out in the pasture to join them in the stables. He picked up the CB and radioed the guys farther out on the property to drive back in. Roxy remained silent and watchful as Noah paced and waited for the entire crew to join them.

  Satisfied that everyone had gathered, he turned to the men. “I think it’s time we clear the air about Roxy.”

  Snickers and whispered comments went up among the men.

  “Shut it!” Noah took a step toward everyone, getting their attention with his rigid frame and steely look. “I’m talking. You’re listening.” Noah waited to have everyone’s full attention again. “First, you’ve all heard the rumors about Roxy’s mother.”

  The men smirked and gave Roxy side-eye glances.

  “Yes, it’s true. She’s a prostitute.”

  One guy slapped another on the chest and said, “Told you.”

  “Her mother is, but Roxy is not.”

  “Come on, man, you expect us to believe that? She owns the Wild Rose Ranch.” Harry eyed Noah with a look that said they all knew the truth and Noah was just trying to hide it.

  They expected the ranch hands to wonder about Roxy with her horses arriving from the Wild Rose Ranch, but not that they’d jump to a conclusion that Roxy owned it.

  Noah and Roxy exchanged a look that clearly said they both knew who outed her as the owner. Tom.

  Another problem that needed to be handled. Soon.

  “Just because she owns it, doesn’t mean she works there.” Noah tilted his head back, took a few seconds, then tried again. “We all know someone, or have heard stories about people addicted to drugs, strung out, not caring about themselves or the people around them.” Noah looked at all the men, some of whom nodded. “John knew Roxy’s mother would never get clean, so he got Roxy and her mom off the streets and out of the shitholes they’d been living in. He set her mother up at the Wild Rose Ranch and Roxy lived alone at ten years old in the cottage on the property. Roxy raised herself, trained horses, and took care of her mother when the drugs and drinking took over her life. Far too often and each time more devastating for Roxy to handle on her own. For reasons I still don’t fully understand and admittedly make me think less of John, he left her there instead of giving her the loving, safe home Annabelle and I had here.

  “When John died, he ordered her here, away from her mother and a life that only brought her pain. He left her the Wild Rose Ranch, which neither she, nor I, knew he owned. He didn’t give it to her because he thought she wanted any part of working there, but as a means for her to continue protecting her mother from herself.

  “That is a small part of Roxy’s story. You want to know more, then take the time to get to know her the way I know her. She’s kind and strong and courageous. She’s taken all your shit and never once complained about the lies you tell about her.

  “It ends now. This is a business. Our business. Roxy and I are partners. We will not tolerate sexual harassment of any kind in the workplace. There will be no more jokes, rude comments, sexual innuendoes, or outright propositions from any of you from this moment forward. You’re better than that.”

  Looks of shame and embarrassment crossed the men’s faces for their locker room talk. No one looked her in the eye.

  “This is a family business. You all have helped John and me watch over Annabelle since she was a toddler on her first pony. Do you want her to think this is how men behave? That it’s okay to treat a woman so disrespectfully? That it’s okay to treat her like she’s beneath you and you can use her as you please without any thought to her feelings?

  “Roxy changed her whole life to come here to protect Annabelle from a mother who is nowhere near as bad as her own, but worse than any of us ever experienced. You know Lisa. You know the damage she’s capable of inflicting on Annabelle with just her words. Imagine the kind of life Roxy had, punctuated with drugs and abuse and no one to keep her safe.

  “Roxy is a champion barrel racer. She’s a better horse trainer than John. I don’t say that lightly. You’ve seen what she’s done with Houdini. She’s raised, bred, and trained horses for years. She’s got the skills. I expect you all to respect her decisions. I expect you to respect her.

  “She spent her whole life feeling like she didn’t belong to anyone or anyplace. That will not happen here. On her ranch. This is her home. You work here. You don’t like the terms, you’re free to leave. Step out of line again, like you all have been doing this past week, you’re fired. Clear?”

  “Clear,” the men answered back, some with sharp replies, others less than enthusiastic.

  “Then I suggest you find the time over the next couple days to introduce yourselves properly to Roxy. Until then, get back to work.”

  A few of the men tipped their cowboy hat or baseball cap to Roxy before they headed out. Others simply gave her a nod and went on their way.

  Harry, head down, eyes on his big feet, shuffled over to her. He stopped a few feet away, scrunched up his lips, and tipped his head just enough to meet her gaze. “Sorry I got the wrong idea about you. I said some stuff . . . didn’t mean it. I got an uncle. Mean sonofabitch when he drinks.”

  “I know the type.” Roxy gave him a grin to let him know she accepted the apology.

  “You’re real pretty.”

  Noah sighed. “Didn’t you hear anything I said?”

  Noah’s rising anger didn’t deter Harry. “Did you get that scar on your lip from your mother?”

  “She liked to pop me in the mouth with the back of her hand when I said something she didn’t like. Which was just about everything I ever said.”

  Harry pointed to the faint scar across his cheek, arcing toward the corner of his mouth. “He used a broken beer bottle. My mom barely got me out of the way before he slit my throat. All because I stole a chip off his plate when I was seven.” Harry turned and walked down the alley toward the stable doors.

  Noah hooked his arm around her shoulders. “I had no idea about his uncle.”

  “People don’t talk about abuse. They hide it. He wants people to like him. So he’s outrageous and gets a laugh and thinks they do. I like him more for being honest.”

  “I think you made a friend today.”

  “Because of you.” She leaned into his side. “What you said to them, Noah . . . you have no idea what it means to me. They respect you. I think most of them will listen to you.”

  “All of them will if they want to keep their jobs. They’ll do it because now they know something real and pers
onal about you. If they can’t treat you with kindness after what I told them, I don’t want them here. Annabelle is turning into a beautiful young woman before my eyes. One day soon, they’ll start noticing. I don’t want them to think they can treat her the way they treated you.” He shook his head. “God, I’m sorry I didn’t put a stop to it sooner.”

  She stepped away from his side and faced him. “Believe me, I’m used to it.”

  “If you’re trying to make me feel better, you’re failing miserably. I hate it that stuff like this, and worse, are a part of your life.”

  “You’re sweet.”

  “At least you don’t think I’m an asshole anymore.”

  “You more than made things up with the way you welcomed Sonya here this weekend.”

  “She’s more than your friend, she’s your family and a guest in our home. Your sisters are welcome anytime.” Noah turned serious again. “About Annabelle and what she said to you on Friday . . .”

  “Forgotten. All of it.”

  “She’s still very quiet around you.” Noah took her hand and walked with her back up to the driveway toward the house, quiet, lost in his thoughts.

  “She’s afraid she’s damaged something between us that can’t be repaired. Don’t worry, I’ll fix it. Starting this afternoon.”

  Noah glanced down at her. “What do you mean?”

  “Did you know she’s interested in becoming a vet?”

  “She loves the horses, but I’ve never heard her say anything about becoming a vet.”

  “That’s because you and John hounded her about school and college. Typical teenager, she rebelled against telling you what she’s thinking about studying rather than shut you up with an actual answer.”

  Noah rolled his eyes.

  “Anyway, I called Dr. Garcia and asked him to change his schedule. Instead of coming in the morning when we need him, he’ll come in the afternoon. He’s agreed to allow Annabelle to watch and assist. He’s going to offer her a weekend job during school and some more days during the summer. It’ll give her an opportunity to experience the job and make sure it’s what she wants to do. She’s old enough to take on a job and learn some responsibility and money management.”