Love Like Crazy (Crazy Love Book 1)

by Carmen DeSousa

I scooped her up and carried her down the short hall to our bedroom.

  “Oh!” she burst out through a giggle, wrapping her hands around my neck.

  “I missed my cowgirl,” I said, pressing my lips to hers as I undressed her.

  Chapter 41 - Jesse

  The weeks passed quickly. Kayla grew stronger every day. She rarely cried in front of me, but sometimes, in the evenings, I’d feel her body shudder. I tried not to ask, but instead just held her.

  I rarely mentioned God, deciding she needed to work things out with Him in her own time.

  Work was intense. Never would I have thought there could be so many issues involved with owning properties. I repeatedly explained to the property managers that they had the authority to make decisions. Kayla had come up with the idea of giving them a budget. If they needed something done and it fell within the parameters we’d agreed upon, then they were to just do it. Documented and receipted, Kayla had added. Still, I was busy every minute of the day, so the weeks flew by, and before I knew it, it was Thanksgiving week. Kayla had the week off school and insisted I take the time off work as well. She reminded me that I didn’t have to do everything; that’s why we had managers in the first place. I doubted she’d spoken to her father like that, but then I wondered if maybe she should have.

  The barn was in place on our property and we found a sixteen-year-old girl who was mature and reliable, to watch the horses while we were away. She’d been coming over to the house every day for the last week with Kayla and me, and we both felt confident that she would do a good job.

  With everything organized, we were packed and ready for our trip to Florida to visit both families. Gram had invited my dad to come to Thanksgiving dinner after asking for my approval. I’d been surprised at my father’s consent; he normally would have spent the day watching football. I was ecstatic: a week with Kayla with nowhere to go and nothing to do but be together. I’d wanted to book a hotel on the beach, but Kayla wanted to stay with Gram, reminding me our honeymoon was coming up next month. Even though she’d canceled our plans for a second wedding — it’d be too painful without her dad, she’d explained — we’d kept our honeymoon plans to go to Paradise Island, Bahamas that last week of the year.

  We spent Monday at the beach and Tuesday kayaking to some of the smaller islands. Gram had allowed me to store a couple of my kayaks at her house, so I was able to just drag them down the backyard and launch. Since there hadn’t been any storms to stir up the sand, the water was shallow and clear. Kayla marveled at stingrays that passed beneath the boat and porpoises that would race with us while we paddled. It wasn’t much of a race; the sleek, powerful animals could leave us in the ripples of water whenever they chose. Porpoises were inquisitive, though, so they’d swim smoothly alongside the kayak, occasionally peering up to gaze at the strange yellow creature with two long fins.

  We spent the entire day on a small, uninhabited island, sunbathing together on our blanket, speaking of our future, reluctantly conversing about business, and eating our standard PB&J picnic lunch.

  Minutes after we entered the water, I gently nudged Kayla back to the beach.

  “What are you doing?”

  I pointed to the edge of the tiny island. “Watch.”

  Kayla lifted her hand above her eyes and gazed in the direction I’d pointed. “What … is … it?” Her sweet southern inflection muttering the same three words from our first encounter, sent a thrill of desire through me, and yet, a hint of melancholy percolated inside my chest too. So much had changed in just eight months — changed her. Life had transformed her from a cheerful carefree girl to a woman who couldn’t be happy for more than a few hours before feeling guilty. But also, to the woman I now loved more than life itself. No doubt, if the need arose, I’d jump in front of gators — or anything or anyone — who ever tried to hurt her again.

  I shook off the thoughts and plastered on a smile. “Just a couple of blacktip reef sharks corralling a school of fish. They’re harmless, but I don’t want them to mistake your leg for a juicy fish.”

  She ran up on shore. “Done swimming!”

  “Why? They’ll be gone in a few minutes. The water’s crystal clear; I can see them coming. Besides, blacktips aren’t interested in you. They don’t know how yummy you taste. Bull sharks, on the other hand —”

  She wrapped a towel around her waist. “Nuff said. I’m done swimming.”

  “Kayla, it’s the same water as Clearwater Beach and Honeymoon Island. You mean to tell me you didn’t know there were sharks?”

  “Yes, but at least there my odds were lower, with a lot of other potential shark bait in the water.”

  I pulled her into my arms. “You’re so cute. Okay. We’ll stay up on land. I’m sure we can find something to keep us busy.”

  The next night, after I’d done some work around the house for Gram, I found Kayla curled up on a chaise reading a book.

  I snuck up behind her and draped my arms over her shoulders. “How ’bout a sunset paddle? The water is like glass, and we have just enough time to get out before the sun sets. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and everyone will be here, so it’d be nice to get away tonight.”

  She squeezed my hand. “That’s okay. Why don’t you just go?”

  A wave of sadness rushed over me, the first I’d felt in a while. Kayla never turned me down for anything. She must have noticed my disappointment because she pulled me to sit down beside her. “Don’t look so sad. I’m okay. I’m just tired.”

  “Would you rather I not go?” I offered reluctantly. “We could just get a movie.”

  “No, Jesse, go. I know how much you miss this.”

  “I have our river, so I don’t miss it too much; there are just more things to see here. It’s not as much fun without you, though.”

  “I’ll be right here. I’ll take a nap, and you can wake me when you return,” she insinuated suggestively, wrapping her hands around my neck.

  “Are you sure?” I asked, searching her eyes warily. I didn’t want to leave her if there was any chance she was going to have a breakdown.

  “Yes. I want you to go. Have fun, okay?” She dropped her arms and pushed me off the chaise playfully. “Go already, so you don’t miss the sunset.”

  I leaned over her again, placing my hand against her cheek, running my thumb over her chin. “So, I should wake you up if you’re sleeping?”

  She grinned. “Yes, please.”

  I used my thumb to coax her mouth open as I pressed my lips against hers. She closed her eyes and sighed. I wasn’t sure if it was a sigh of longing or exhaustion, though. I pulled back and forced myself to let her relax. I was such a worrier, I knew, but I couldn’t imagine why she wanted to stay home. A nap? When did Kayla nap? I pulled out my gear and headed down the sloping backyard toward the beach.

  I paddled through the inland waters, out toward the open waters of the gulf. It was faster using my sea kayak than the two-man sit-on-top I used with Kayla. The feeling was exhilarating. The speed and the muscles I used that had been all but dormant these last few months were much-needed therapy. It felt better knowing she was home waiting for me. Last time I’d come out here, before I’d moved to North Carolina, all I could think about was Kayla. Now, even though she was always foremost in my mind, I felt like I could finally relax. She was with Gram, not alone, and I realized it was the first time in months that I was doing something entirely for myself. Paddling faster, I relished the breeze whipping my face and arms. The smells were familiar, taking me back to a time when I had less worries, even if they weren’t happier times. I’d never been happy, I realized, not since I was a child. As my head cleared, I realized that as much heartache as the last two months had been, I wouldn’t trade them for anything if it meant not having Kayla. The love I had for her surpassed any and all other feelings.

  Thanksgiving dinner was the type of family gathering I had dreamed about when I was growing up. After clearing it with Gram, my father brought Brock with him.

 
Charity, William, and Melissa were also present, and the animosity I’d felt at our last gathering had all but disappeared. I did detect Melissa eyeing everything Kayla and I did, but chalked it up to her motherly concern.

  Kayla nibbled at her dinner, not really eating, just moving the food around her plate. The first holiday without her dad was probably too much for her. Holidays hadn’t been good for me in years, and I felt guilty that I was enjoying this one so much when she was clearly in pain.

  The family and conversations moved to the porch after dinner. Charity and Brock seemed to be getting along a little too well, which managed to sidetrack Melissa’s attention. I’d never thought about introducing the two of them, but now that I observed them talking and laughing together, I realized they were a perfect match. Brock was about three years older than Charity, but that was probably a good thing; she needed a strong, independent man.

  I wondered what Kayla thought of the pair, but when I turned to inquire on her thoughts, she was gone. I quietly searched the main area of the house where the family had been congregating since dinner. She wasn’t in the dining room, kitchen, or living room. I walked into our bedroom and found her curled up in a fetal position on our bed. I didn’t want to disturb her, but I didn’t want to leave her alone either. She’d been downhearted over dinner, and I’d wondered when it would hit her.

  Drawing up beside her, I wrapped my arms around her. Short gasps escaped her throat, as though she were in the aftermath of crying. It saddened me that she’d come in here to cry alone, and worse, that I’d been so busy talking I hadn’t noticed.

  “I’m here, baby,” I whispered.

  She started sobbing softly in response. “I miss him so much, Jesse.”

  “I know.” There was nothing else to say, so I just pulled her tighter. She settled down after a few minutes; her crying spells were shorter than they used to be. I found that I just needed to hold her through them.

  “And I’m so tired. I don’t understand it. I was trying to keep up with everyone, but felt like it was getting to be too much.” She was still for a few minutes before speaking again. “Did you notice the way Charity was looking at Brock? I’ve never seen her enthralled with anyone like that. She likes him.”

  I chuckled. “I was thinking the same thing. Melissa doesn’t look too happy, though.”

  Kayla turned in my arms and started giggling too. “I guess two plumbers in the family is too much for her, huh? What is it about you plumbers that attracts us spoiled rich girls?”

  “Hey, I’m not a plumber anymore, remember? You turned me into a landlord.”

  “Real-estate developer,” she corrected. “Is Brock a good guy?”

  “I think so. I don’t know the entire story, but his ex-wife sounded like an unpleasant woman. From what I understand, she cheated on him. When he confronted her, she asked for a divorce, and then had her father fire him. He seemed pretty distraught about the entire ordeal.”

  “Well, it isn’t our business anyway, is it?”

  “No, it’s not. I didn’t appreciate people interfering with our decisions.” I paused a moment, kissing her on the forehead. “Do you feel well enough to go back out? I’m sure they’ve missed us by now.”

  “Yeah. Just give me a few minutes to catch my breath and freshen up.”

  “Are you okay, Kayla? I mean physically okay? It’s not like you to be tired. You have more energy than anyone I know.”

  “Just stress. First holiday and all.”

  “Okay. Hurry out soon.” I helped her up, but left the room to give her a moment to collect her thoughts.

  Gram’s eyes shot up when she saw me walk into the room, and she gave me a knowing nod. She didn’t ask any questions, nor did anyone else. They understood. I imagined they’d been through the same thing when Brooke died, so they would realize what Kayla was dealing with.

  I spent a little time talking with my dad privately about business and Brock. To my surprise, Dad changed the subject to a personal matter. “Jesse, I have to leave early if that’s okay. I have another dinner to attend.”

  I couldn’t keep the grin off my face. “Dad! You have a date?”

  “Little more than a date, son. Her name is Susan. She has two teenage kids, so she couldn’t come to our dinner tonight; it wouldn’t be right to confuse them so early in a relationship. So I agreed to have dinner with her family later because I wanted to be here with you.” He paused briefly, then his words spilled out, “I’m sorry, son. I know I wasn’t much of a father all these years. I was preoccupied in my own grief. When you left, I realized how much I missed you. I want to thank you for everything. For the cooking, the cleaning, the work you did for me, for Brock. Everything. I love you, Jesse, and I want you to know that I believe you have grown to be a fine man.”

  “I love you too, Dad. Thank you,” I said, stunned. I had waited for years to hear those words from my father. I’d spent my childhood trying to please him, to be good enough. Maybe we could still be a family. Maybe it wasn’t too late. “Hey, do I get to meet her?”

  “You want to?” he asked, his dark eyebrows rising.

  “Of course I do. I’m sure Kayla will too. Ask Susan if it’ll be all right, then call me later. Maybe we can do something tomorrow or Saturday? We’re leaving pretty early Sunday.”

  “Sounds good, Jesse. I feel lucky to have you as a son.” He hugged me fiercely then. I squeezed back, delighted to have my father back.

  We walked back inside together, and Kayla was there, looking much better. She’d removed all of her makeup, which was fine with me. Her skin glowed from the sun she’d received the last several days, and her eyes were glistening. She was absolutely the most beautiful I’d ever seen her. Maybe it was just the overall feeling of the day, but I had a hard time not gathering her up right there in front of everyone and carrying her away.

  My father told Brock that he was leaving. And to no one’s surprise, Brock looked disappointed as he stood to leave Charity. I quickly offered to drive Brock home later if he preferred, but then Kayla looked disappointed. I nudged her playfully, then whispered in her ear, “We’ll find something to do on the way back.”

  It turned out we didn’t have to drive Brock after all. Charity had brought her own car, planning to meet some friends for a movie that evening, and her plans now included Brock. I couldn’t suppress a smile at Melissa’s chagrin. No matter how much Melissa wanted to fight it, it was going to happen. I saw the look in Brock’s eyes when they left. It wasn’t lust; it was a fire I recognized all too well. This evening would be life-altering for the two of them. I hoped Charity would be good enough for him. She appeared to have changed in the last eight months, and she was looking at Brock with the same passion.

  William and a sullen Melissa left next, and Gram excused herself for the evening. Gram had no equal, and I was thankful that my spirit had recognized her kindness long before I’d ever met Kayla.

  After everyone had left, Kayla and I sat outside on the dock and spent a long while just gazing at the moon and stars as they reflected in the peaceful inland waterway. Neither of us said a word, content just to be together. Finally, she stood and took my hand, leading me back to the house. I’d hoped that she wouldn’t be too sad tonight, because the way she looked, I didn’t know how I’d manage to keep my hands to myself. That was the reason I’d suggested walking down to the dock instead of retreating directly to bed. I wanted tonight to be her choice.

  Back in our room, Kayla stood in front of me. Her dress, a simple, cream-colored cotton, with unneeded straps that had trouble staying up all evening, was alluring. One of the straps was falling over her shoulder. She moved to adjust it and I stopped her, tracing the line of the strap around her arm. “You’re so sexy, Kayla. Sexier tonight than I’ve ever seen you. It has taken every ounce of willpower I have not to whisk you off to our room or attack you earlier.”

  “I don’t feel very sexy,” she replied modestly.

  “Oh, but you are.” I lowered my head and fo
llowed the line of her neck across her collarbone. I breathed in the natural perfume of her skin, and it sent a warm sensation through my body. I reached for the back of her dress, searching. I lowered the zipper, then lightly pulled down the other strap. Her dress fell to the floor and she stepped out. I sat down on the bed and pulled her in front of me. I kissed her stomach, trailing my hands down her hips and thighs. “How can you not know how sexy you are? Just looking at you I go insane.”

  She giggled. “You’re biased.”

  “Hmm … works for me. I hope no other men are thinking what I am when they look at you. If I could hear their thoughts, I’m sure I’d get in a lot of fights.”

  I pulled her down and she giggled again. “Shh, Kayla. No giggling. We’re in your grandmother’s house. She’ll hear you.”

  “We’re married,” she countered.

  “Still, I may have to stop if you can’t keep quiet,” I teased, as if that’d be possible, looking and feeling the way she did in my arms.

  “Okay, I’ll try,” she whimpered.

  I purposely tickled her then to test her. She burst into more giggles. “I’m serious, Kayla.” I wasn’t, but I was having too much fun. I did my best to make her struggle with keeping quiet, a challenge I found pleasurable. I knew Gram couldn’t hear; she was on the opposite side of the house, and these walls were solid plaster.

  To my satisfaction, Kayla couldn’t keep quiet no matter how hard she tried. She pleaded with me futilely, but I ignored her half-hearted appeals. She’d never enjoyed me this much, and I simply couldn’t resist pleasing her.

  When we were totally spent, I gathered her up and stared into her eyes for her reaction. For once, she was speechless.

  The next morning I started awake when Kayla jumped out of bed and scurried to the bathroom. I quickly followed, but she slammed the door behind her. I turned the handle and peered in cautiously. She’d already thrown herself to the floor, positioning her body over the toilet. Despite her glare, I entered. I held back her hair, praying I wouldn’t get sick. I had a strong stomach, but this wasn’t easy. Luckily, it was over fairly quickly. Kayla stood up and went to the sink and rinsed out her mouth, then brushed her teeth.