by D Gourlay
“I wasn’t sure you’d come.” He sneers.
“I should have just called the police.” I say determinedly.
“Oh, but then you’d end up in the same position as me wouldn’t you? You’d end up in prison, and Rachel would leave you and be in bed with someone else by the end of the week.”
“What do you want?”
“Like I said, I just wanted to talk. Have a little chat! How are you anyway?” He steps closer and I instinctively take a step back.
“How am I? Really?”
“Okay, you got me.” He pulls a knife from his back pocket and begins twisting the shiny blade in his hands. “You see, I’ve already lost everything. There’s no doubt I will spend the rest of my life in prison, so I have nothing to lose.” My palms start sweating and I know I have to tread carefully. “Where’s your phone?” He shouts and I slowly take it from my pocket. “Throw it here.”
I throw it violently at him and it hits his chest before falling to the floor. He bends to pick it up and stares at it before looking back at me. “What a lovely photo.” He says through gritted teeth. My screensaver is a photo of Ami and Rachel, smiling broadly at a huge mountain of ice cream in front of them. “Just precious. My wife. My daughter. You just went and took it all, didn’t you?” The smile has disappeared from his face. He throws my phone back on the ground and stamps on it repeatedly, until it is smashed beyond repair. Once he has kicked it to one side, he steps threateningly towards me. I step back, only to realise I have cornered myself against a wall. I can feel adrenaline coursing through my body and I realise there is only going to be one way out of this.
“So what, you’re here to kill me then?” I stand up straight and stare at him as he walks menacingly towards me.
“If you’ve only just worked that out, then I’m guessing intelligence didn’t have much to do with you making all that money.”
He lunges forward, knife first, and I manage to knock his hand out of the way. His sleeve moves up his arm, and I can see his wrists are wrapped in bloodied bandages.
His other arm comes towards me, and he tries to grab my shoulder. I use my opposite hand to grab his wrist and squeeze, making him cry out in pain. His eyes open and anger flashes through them.
Knife still gripped tightly in his other hand, he waves it around desperately, trying to connect with me, but I manage to kick him to the floor, grabbing the knife from his hand in the process.
“Seriously? What made you think you could actually kill me?” I laugh and I almost feel pity as I look at him. The blood is seeping through his bandages now and he looks pale.
I throw the knife over the wall behind me and debate what to do now. I have no way of calling the police or anyone, and I highly doubt he is going to willingly come anywhere with me.
He starts laughing and stands up in front of me, swaying slightly.
“You could have killed me with that.” He scoffs.
“I don’t want to kill you. I want you to go back to prison and rot for every day of your miserable life.”
“God, you’re so weak, just like Daddy.” He laughs and I just stare at him. “Oh, I guess you probably don’t know, but I knew your Dad. We actually worked together for a little while.” I swallow hard, lost for words. He stands in front of me, so close that I can see now just how ghostly white he looks.
“I started my career in London, your Dad was my boss. Stuck up prick that he was.” He laughs and I clench my fists. “He’d be very proud of you I’m sure. You’re a lot like him. Egotistical wanker, thought he knew better than everyone. Obviously didn’t know not to stand in front of a loaded gun though hey?”
“Be very careful what you say next.” I growl at him.
“Why? What you gonna do? You’re just like him! No balls. Brush over problems and act like they don’t exist. A bit like me. You can brush me over as many times as you want. It really doesn’t matter. I’ll still always be in Rachel’s head. I’ll always find a way to make your lives as difficult as possible. Prison clearly can’t hold me. Even if by some miracle you manage to get me locked up again tonight, it won’t be long until I’m back out, only this time, I’ll go straight for her.” His smile disappears from his face instantly as my fist collides with his cheek, sending him staggering backwards.
He lunges at me, his hands gripping tightly around my neck.
“God, you didn’t honestly think you’d get your happy ending, did you?” His grip tightens around my throat and I desperately try to pull his arms away. His eyes are wide and wild, and once my brain kicks in, I remember his wrists. I dig my nails into the soaked bandages with everything I have and he screams as he stumbles backwards.
He opens his mouth in a loud roar and runs towards me, grabbing my shoulders and throwing me hard into the wall. Instinctively, I push him backwards, and quickly block his arm as he swings it towards my face.
“You don’t get to win Turner. Not this time.” He yells at me. He grabs hold of my arms, and as I’m distracted, trying to get him off of me, he lunges his knee straight into my stomach. He knocks the wind out of me and I bend down, clutching my waist, and spinning around to try to get way from the knee that’s coming towards my face.
I feel the air along my face as it grazes my cheek, and without thinking, I grab hold of him and throw all of my weight into him, making him fall to the ground.
Adrenaline thundering through my veins, I pin him to the floor and hear a crack as I punch him hard across the face.
Deep, red blood is spilling from his mouth and nose, and I start looking around for something to tie him up with so I can go and get the police.
I’m distracted by him laughing underneath me.
“I bet your Dad is looking down absolutely loving this. Watching his only remaining son get his revenge.” He looks around and shouts “Enjoying the show?!”
“What do you mean revenge?” He carries on laughing and I grab the front of his shirt, lifting his face closer to mine.
“Well, a lot of people blamed me for him being shot.” He whispers. I drop him and watch him wince as his head hits the ground. “I mean, I told him, we needed to get in there. There was a fucking lunatic with a gun and there were kids in the shop! He wanted to fucking wait! The spineless cunt, wanted to wait around to save his own arse, when there was a child that might have been killed. I found a way in through the back of the shop. I was about to be a hero, I was going to save the day.
“And then your fucking Dad turns up behind me, silently demanding I get out before I got someone killed. I mean, I didn’t mean to push him. Well, maybe I did. But I didn’t intend for him to scare the guy into shooting him. That was just a little bonus I guess.”
His words swim around my head and I let go of his shirt, letting his head slam against the floor.
He is the reason my dad is dead. He hurt Rachel. He took Ami.
My spiraling thoughts are interrupted by his deranged laugh, penetrating the silence around us. I need to get out of here, I need to find a way of getting this excuse of a man back in prison and locked away, by himself, for every second of the rest of his life.
“We can do this the easy way, or not, it’s up to you. But one way or another, you will be back behind bars in a few hours.” I growl, desperately trying to keep my temper in check.
“I’m not going anywhere with you. And if you leave me here, I’ll head straight for Rachel. Someone is dying tonight Turner, her or you, I couldn’t care less at this point.” He hisses, and it’s at that point I lose it. Mist feels like it creeps into my vision from all angles, and I feel like I’ve lost all control over my body.
“You will not touch her!” I scream in his face, and his answering smile turns my stomach. Before I know what I am doing, I’ve picked up his head and slammed it with as much force as I can manage into the ground.
I hear a sickening crunch, and crimson blood starts to flood from under his head. I freeze, desperately trying to listen for breathing, but all I can hear is my own heart p
ounding in my ears. He just lays there, completely motionless, eyes glazing over.
I’ve killed him.
He’s fucking dead.
I jump up and stagger backwards into the wall.
What the fuck have I done?
I run as fast as I can and I keep running until I see lights in the distance. There’s a shop open and I run inside, startling the man behind the desk. His eyes widen as he looks me up and down and I realise I’m covered in blood.
“I need to use your phone. Please.”
Chapter Eighteen
As I walk back to the car park, I can hear sirens coming from all directions. A car is pulling up and Robins bounds out and runs over to me.
“What happened? Where is he?” He shouts at me and I point over to the lifeless body a few feet in the distance. He turns back to look at me before racing over to Kevin’s body.
“What the hell happened?” He yells after failing to find a pulse.
“He called me, said he needed to speak to me. He said if I came with police he would kill Rachel.” I lie, I mean I have to tell him something, and I can’t very well tell a police officer that Kevin had incriminating evidence on me.
Robins runs his fingers through his hair and kicks the ground. “Fuck!”
Paramedics are rushing over to Kevin, one checks for his pulse and then shakes his head.
“How the hell did he end up dead?” Robins storms over to me looking furious.
“He had a knife!” I shout back. “He didn’t want to talk, he wanted to kill me! I was bloody defending myself.” I show him the marks on my neck from where Kevin’s nails dug into me as he tried to strangle me.
“Where is this knife now?”
“I threw it over the wall, I managed to get it away from him and didn’t want it anywhere near him. But then he resorted to using his hands.”
Robins signals two other officers to go and look behind the wall for the knife.
“Mr Turner, this is very important, would you say you used reasonable force to defend yourself? Or was there any way in which you could have incapacitated him without killing him?” He is looking at me as if he is trying to help me. But no, that’s probably not the case. He was so weak, he wouldn’t have been able to kill me. I just lost it. What he said about my Dad. Threatening Rachel.
I sigh and open my mouth before Robins cuts me off. “Mr Turner, it’s imperative you understand what I’m saying. The next words that come out of your mouth will decide if I have to arrest you for murder, or if I can establish you acted honestly and instinctively in self defence to avoid your own death.”
“Yes, I used reasonable force.” I sigh and Robins almost smiles at me. He pats my arm softly.
“I’ll still need to question you officially, but right now you have an extremely worried wife at home. I’ll get someone to drive you to your house and I’ll be over in a few hours.” I turn and my stomach lurches as I see Kevin’s corpse being hauled onto a stretcher.
Rachel
Bright light creeps through the curtains as the sun starts to rise. It’s been hours, nobody knows anything and I’m going out of my fucking mind.
My fingertips are sore and bloody where I have spent the last few hours chewing my nails, pacing the floor, waiting to hear something. Anything.
I hear a car door slam closed from outside and I race to the window. My heart almost leaps from my chest when I see Tad walking towards the house and I run as fast as I can to the front door. I fling the door open, and my smile quickly drops when I see that he is covered in blood. He walks in and wraps his arms tightly around me, lifting me and carrying me in the house.
“Tad, what happened?” I hold his face in my hands and examine him, trying to find the source of the blood. “Are you hurt?” He shakes his head and carries me through to the front room, where he sits down, leaving me on his lap.
He buries his face in my neck and I just hold him tightly, brain racing as I wonder whose blood is all over him.
I give him a few minutes before my impatience gets the better of me.
“Tad, please, tell me what happened.” I lift his face and look into his eyes.
“He’s dead.” He whispers and closes his eyes.
I inhale sharply and my brain becomes even louder.
“Who is?” I whisper, already knowing the answer.
“Kevin, I killed him.” He opens his eyes and looks into mine. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what to think.
“Rachel, there’s something I have to tell you, and you’re going to fucking hate me, but if I don’t tell you now I never will.” I swallow hard and wait for him to speak.
“The day of the security breech at the office, there was another reason I was so angry.” He is telling me about work? What the hell has this got to do with him killing Kevin?
“Tad, I-”
“No, please Rachel.” I close my mouth and listen, confused. “There was some incredibly sensitive information that was taken that day. Information I am absolutely not proud of. After I started the business, and when my name started appearing in the papers more, I started sleeping with escorts.” My eyes widen and I already don’t like where this is going. “I didn’t want a relationship, and I didn’t want people running to the papers selling stories about what I like to do in the bedroom. So I thought this was better. I'd have them sign non-disclosure agreements, so they wouldn’t be able to go to the press.” He takes a breath and looks down.
“Okay.” I start but then he looks at me and the look on his face sends a chill down my spine.
“One day, one of the women I slept with turned up at my office. With a baby.”
Oh. God.
“I offered her money Rachel, to walk out of the office and never come back. I wrote a cheque, I wrote up an NDA, and I was perfectly happy for this woman to take my son and my money and disappear.”
I feel sick. I can’t think of anything to say. Shocked doesn’t quite cover how I’m feeling right now. “How much did you give her?” I whisper almost silently.
“Nothing. It turns out the baby wasn’t mine, she was just trying to get money from me.” He exhales and looks disgusted with himself.
“How did you find out?”
“I didn’t. Susan did.”
I nod. How do I even begin to take any of this in right now? And then I remember what he told me before all of that.
“What has any of this got to do with Kevin?” I ask, finally breaking the uncomfortable silence.
“I don’t know how, but Kevin got hold of all of that information. It was him that called me on our honeymoon.” My mind is spinning and I’m struggling to think straight at all. “He told me that I’d be seeing him soon. Of course it all made sense when we found out he had escaped.”
My brain stops spinning and is taken over by anger. “Why the hell did you not tell anyone?! Why didn’t you tell me?” I stand and scream at him. “All that shit you gave me about thinking too much into what he was doing, and he’d told you he would see you soon?”
“Rach, I’m so sorry. I fucked up.” He stands and grabs my arms. I can’t look away from his eyes, they are wide and vulnerable, and his regret is so clearly genuine. “After we argued, I just needed to go for a walk, to clear my head. While I was out, he called me and told me to meet him. And of course I’m an idiot, so I met him. I knew he didn’t just want to talk, but he had a knife, he was there just to kill me.” I have to sit back on the sofa because I’m not sure my legs are going to hold out. “Rach, he’s a fucking monster. He said even if he went back to prison, he would get out again and kill you. And he-” His eyes fill with tears and I just want to wrap my arms around him and make everything better. I hold his hand and squeeze it, urging him to carry on.
He takes a deep breath before he continues. “He used to work with my Dad.”
What?!
“He hated him, they didn’t get on. And it was because of him my Dad got shot.” Tad closes his ey
es just as a tear slips down his cheek and I don’t have a clue what to say or do. I lift his arm and crawl on to his lap. He grips me tightly and we sit in silence for a long time. I don’t need to hear anything else.
My brain is going a million miles an hour. This is why Kevin had to transfer. This is why he refused to tell me why. This is what he was going on about when I went to visit him in prison! Everything starts to make sense and the horror I feel in my chest is enough to make my own eyes water.
Kevin was evil from day one. There was no point where he was ever a good man. The amount of lives he has ruined, it makes me sick.
And then I remember, he is dead. Tad killed him. He will never again be waiting around a corner. My emotions are so conflicted and I just don’t know what to think.
“Tad?” He lifts his head and looks at me with red eyes. “I love you so much, you know that right?” He smiles softly and leans his lips into mine.
♦ ♦ ♦
The next week is a blur of meetings with police and lawyers. Mum and Dad helped me to keep Ami in the dark the next day, until we had a better idea of the legal side of things.
Telling her was by far one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. She sobbed in my arms until she fell asleep, and then when she woke she cried again. I explained as much to her as I could, knowing that it would all be public knowledge in a few days’ time anyway. I was so worried about how she would react that Tad was the one who ultimately killed her father.
When she asked to go back to the house I took her straight away, but I held my breath as she walked through the door and up to Tad. His eyes widened and he looked almost terrified in that moment. But she walked straight up to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. He lifted her up, holding her tight, apologising over and over.
Tad has been found to have used reasonable force to defend himself, and will face no charges. Kevin’s body will be released in a few days for his funeral, and Ami has decided she wants to go to say a final goodbye.
Tad has been distant, which I guess is to be expected. He has been spending a lot of time either in his office or hiding in bed. Although, I’m not sure how much sleep he has actually had recently. He always comes up to bed after me, and when I wake up in the mornings, he is already up, usually sitting in bed, staring out of the window, lost in his own world.
