Fairy Slayer

by Logan Jacobs

  But, I reminded myself, this was my childhood dream come true. Magic, adventure, and a very hot elf.

  “You know,” I said to Ariette before I realized what I was doing. “You’re really pretty. Prettier than I’d have imagined you’d be.”

  “Um… thanks,” she said as a flush spread across her cheeks. “But I don’t think I’m quite following.”

  “Oh, yeah, sorry.” I rubbed the back of my head. “I was just thinking about how when I was a kid watching shows about the Fae hunters and whatnot. I always daydreamed that I could be one, you know. Stupid kid stuff.” Then I smirked and gestured at her. “And of course there would be a pretty elf girl by my side. But yeah, you’re even prettier than the girl of my dreams, and well, you want me to be part of your team.” I smiled at her. “Thanks.”

  “You’re welcome,” she said, and I could tell she was more than a little pleased at my words. “You’re really sweet.” Then she put on a kind expression, sighed, and reached out to squeeze my hand. “And I know this is a lot to take in. I guess you really are leaving your old life behind. I hope it winds up being as great as you hoped it would be.”

  She gave me one last smile before she turned back toward the screens on the wall, and as I followed her gaze, I realized the walls of the van seemed to be divided into sections. Along the side across from me was a little mission control station, with more computers, some keyboards, and an array of little technological devices. I saw a few recorders among the mess, but many were things I didn’t recognize. One of them even looked as if it could be mobile. It was a ball with long skinny legs sticking out of it in four places, like some kind of huge mechanical spider.

  Next to mission control was an open cabinet full of different deadly weapons. There were a few traditional swords and guns, two bows and arrows that matched the ones on Ariette’s back, and a handful of grenades. But there were also huge light swords that sparked with electricity, and a staff with a glowing, purple orb on top.

  As I stepped further inside, I turned to see what was behind me. There was a full kitchen, stocked with all kinds of food. I saw protein bars next to reddish brown elven bread, and an entire basket of oranges, dragon fruit, and Dracunian melons. My mouth watered at the thought of what it would be like to taste a Dracunian melon. I had never been able to afford it, but I heard they tasted like magic and marshmallows. They grew only on the tops of the mountains of Dracun and were a delicacy, even for the Fae.

  Next to the kitchen, a table was pushed up against the wall, and on top of it sat a glassy sphere that shimmered and rippled like the surface of a lake. Every so often, a small face would pop up in the center of the sphere, and it would grow larger as it came toward the top of the object, before it popped like a bubble and disappeared. I had never seen anything like it before, and just as I was about to turn and ask Ariette what the hell it was, a loud alarm that sounded like a cross between a goose’s honk and a smoke alarm blared throughout the van.

  A few moments later, a small form barreled out from behind the curtain that separated the back of the van from the driver’s seat. The blur of movement almost knocked me over as it headed straight to the kitchen area where the honking originated from.

  “Shouldn’t take so long to brew a damn coffee,” the form mumbled as arms quickly pulled a mug down from a cabinet and poured a stream of what looked like the strongest cup of coffee ever to grace the face of the Earth. “Fucking old piece of crap technology. Oh, it’s better, they told me. Best cup of joe you’ll ever have, they told me. Can’t even get it to brew faster than ten damn minutes. Stupid humans with their stupid machines, and their stupid traditions, and--”

  “Kalista!” Ariette hollered, tone firm but edged with amusement. The tiny form turned toward me, and I finally was able to take her in once the quick movements and angry grumbling had ceased.

  She was pretty in a sort of other-worldly way. Her frame was short and slightly stout, made more proportional by large round hips and a busty chest that threatened to rip the fabric of her top apart at any second. She wore a brown t-shirt, cut into a deep v-neck that was laced together like a sneaker and showed off her ample breasts. The style was popular among humans, so I was pretty surprised to see a Fae in a shirt like that. Her legs were clad in tight skinny jeans that definitely should not have allowed for the amount of movement she had shown on her journey to get her coffee. One hand fiddled with a piece of jewelry around her neck. It was a thin gold chain, with a single tiny feather hung on it. It was a beautiful necklace, but it couldn’t hold a flame to her face and hair.

  Her pale nose was tiny, upturned, and covered with a spattering of freckles. It sat just below large almond-shaped eyes that blinked beneath long thick lashes. Her irises were a violent purple, an almost fuschia color that took me completely by surprise and lent her an intense gaze I could almost feel myself get lost in. And at the crown of her head sat a mass of spiked silver hair. It wasn’t the kind of silver that came from age or from a box of hair dye. It was the kind of silver swords and fine jewelry were made from.

  “Yo, can I help you?” It was then that I noticed her voice. It wasn’t deep at all like I had expected given her stature. While it wasn’t nearly as soothing and commanding as Ariette’s, Kalista’s voice carried a melodious ripple that ran through it, as if she sang every word.

  She must have noticed my stare, and I heard Ariette giggle behind me.

  “No, no, I just was… your eyes are--” I fumbled for words because I’d never encountered anyone who looked quite like her, Fae or human.

  “Yeah, yeah, I’m half-dwarf, half-elf, that’s why I look so different. Yes, I have a Hand. No, I don’t drink beer and eat cake all day. Yes, I’m taller than the average dwarf. Yes, I’ve got magic. No, besides my Hand I can’t do anything more than tracker spells and a little befuddlement. Did I cover everything?” Her violet eyes looked at me with that intense gaze again, and she crossed her arms over her pale breasts.

  “Oh, well… um…” I still couldn’t find my words. I wasn’t sure whether to be terrified or amused by this woman, who was barely five feet tall, staring at me like I was a petulant toddler.

  She narrowed her violet eyes at me. “Well then, what are you?”

  “Kalista!” Ariette’s cry of annoyance surprised me almost as much as the look of anger that crossed her features.

  “Sorry, but he’s just staring at me! It’s rude!” Kalista turned herself around and stomped back over to her steaming mug in a huff.

  “Uhhh, sorr--” I started to say, but she turned back to her coffee.

  “Everybody’s always staring at me,” she mumbled quiet enough that she must have figured no one would hear.

  “Kalista, this is Milton.” Ariette motioned to me as she stepped in between the two of us. “Milton, this is Kalista. She’s our go-to for all things tech-related. Basically, she saves our asses, day in and day out.”

  “Hell yeah I do,” Kalista grunted, and as she whipped herself back around, that violet gaze landed back on me. She didn’t blink much which made her gaze all the more intense, and I fought the urge to squirm.

  “It’s nice to meet you, Kalista. Sorry for staring earlier.” I stuck my hand out as I breached the distance between us.

  The tiny tech guru looked at my outstretched arm for a brief second before she shifted her coffee mug to her left hand and grasped my palm with the other.

  “No worries, dude. Now you got it over with though. You only get one time.”

  “Right.” I nodded.

  “He’s the one who killed that thing.” Ariette put one hand on my shoulder and electricity ran up my arm. Her hand was warm and soft, and it left an imprint on me even after she removed it. It took everything I had to command myself to focus and not get lost in the fantasy of what that hand would feel like in other, much more sensitive places.

  “No shit, all by yourself?” Kalista’s question knocked me out of my fantasy, and I shrugged calmly as I placed my hands in my pockets and
assumed the most macho position I could.

  “Yea, it was nothing. I saw a problem, and I took care of it. No biggie.” I turned my gaze to the ceiling in cool disinterest.

  “No, it was pretty big, what you did back there. You saved that little girl’s life,” Ariette said with a tiny half smile, and I thought I detected a hint of awe in her voice.

  I turned to meet her round ocean blue eyes and noticed a strand of hair had fallen loose from the elf’s braid. It tickled her ear in a way that begged me to reach out and tuck it back, but once again, Kalista’s voice interrupted my fantasy.

  “Wait, are you a Magi?” Her eyes narrowed, and she put her coffee back down on the table, both hands on her hips now.

  I blinked.

  Shit.

  In my frantic state, after the fairy turned over his Hand to me and the world had flipped itself upside down, I hadn’t even thought about the law. All I knew was my blood pumped through my veins stronger than ever before, and the world seemed bright and new again. And there was a monster hell-bent on killing a little girl and causing as much destruction as possible. I hadn’t thought about the consequences of my actions before I ripped every drop of blood from its body with my Hand.

  But I wasn’t a Magi, and I wasn’t registered with the government. The first rule any human learned before we even learn how to dial 911 or make cereal, was to never interfere with magic. From the very beginning of our lives, it was drilled into our heads: magic is for the Fae, and for the Fae only. Unless a guild gives you explicit permission, don’t touch magic, don’t study magic, and most importantly, don’t use magic. And I had completely ignored human rule number one. This meant I had broken the law in a major way.

  In a way that could get me killed.

  But I couldn’t lie. If I lied and were found out, which was pretty much going to happen since I knew I wouldn’t be anywhere in their system, I’d definitely get myself killed. So it was between maybe being killed and definitely being killed.

  And for the second time that day, I made a split second decision and hoped for the best.

  “Uh… no, I’m not,” I stuttered in response, and the elf’s face fell slightly.

  “Aw, HC, don’t you know non-Magis aren’t supposed to use magic?”

  The disappointment was clear in Ariette’s voice, but my world spun. I couldn’t focus on her. Here I was, with two government agents, basically admitting I’d broken one of the very few laws that no human should ever break. I started to imagine all the ways in which the High Court might do away with me forever when Ariette spoke again.

  “We will tell them it was me,” she said, and her firm voice left no room for argument.

  Well, I sure as hell wasn’t about to argue.

  “Ari, I don’t think--” Kalista started, before the elven warrior cut her off.

  “Kalista, we tell them it was me. That thing’s dead, for damn good reason. No one will even question it. If Milton hadn’t been there, who knows how many more it would have killed? I don’t have the power he has. We tell them it was me, we register him as a Magi, and it’s done.”

  “Fine,” Kalista grumbled, “but if any of this blows back on us, I’m not speaking to you for at least a thousand years.”

  Kalista plopped her butt in a wheeled desk chair and spun it around as she sipped her coffee. Those violet eyes looked up at me every once in a while as if she grappled with making a decision about whether or not she liked me. Ariette moved over to the weaponry cabinet and undid the bow and quiver from around her torso. She hung each one up with care and then joined Kalista in a wheeled desk chair of her own. They whispered to each other, and Kalista turned on a computer. Her snowy fingers typed things into the screen in Elvish, a language I couldn’t read. Every once in a while, the elven warrior would pick up a recorder and speak into it, her voice clear but the words foreign.

  I glanced around the van for a few minutes before I cleared my throat. It was like they’d forgotten I was there. When neither one looked up, I shuffled forward and bent between the two of them so that I could get their attention.

  “Are we going to go somewhere, or just sit here for the rest of the day?” I asked.

  “Yo, relax, human. We’re getting you registered as a Magi, so your ass doesn’t get in any more trouble for unsanctioned magic use.” Violet eyes rolled in their sockets as Kalista kept her gaze on the computer screen.

  I didn’t have too long to sit with the pit in my stomach, though, because one of the screens that displayed the cleanup of the city street crackled and pixelated before it switched to a new view.

  The screen was overtaken by an older female face. Her age was apparent only in the white hair that swept down across her forehead and lay close to her scalp on both sides of her skull. It was short like a crew cut military humans wore, but the pointed ears on the sides of her head told me she was an elf. She had a long neck that met the bottom of the screen, and the rest of her body was hidden from sight.

  Her face was wise, battle-worn, and yet extremely tough. One eye was covered in a light green colored patch that was so pale it was almost white. On it was the symbol of the Jefferson Guild, which ruled over Jefferson City and its surrounding territories. It looked like a circle with a sword inside of it. Her pale skin softly glowed, and her visible eye crinkled at the corner. The only signs of age on her face rested in those crow’s feet. Thin lips wrapped around perfectly aligned white teeth and the lips turned up at the ends in a jovial smile. She seemed like the intersection of wise, kind, and badass. I liked her already.

  “How’d we do, team?” She surveyed the two women in front of me, and both stood straight as a board as they saluted her. Her voice was deep and gruff, with a hint of sexy femininity, and there was a lilting in her tone that told me she was raised a lady. She had the accent of the High Elves, but the look of a military star.

  “The creature was disposed of, Danira. I killed it. We counted two-hundred and sixty-one dead, about one-third of them Fae.” Ariette nodded with finality as Kalista looked up from her computer.

  “Can’t find any record of anything like this monster in any databases, Fae or human. By all accounts, this thing doesn’t exist.” The sureness faded from Kalista’s voice slightly as she finished up, and I got the sense that she was forcing herself not to let any worry come through in her words.

  “Except it does exist,” the warrior, Danira, muttered. “Best you all come back to base while we sort this thing out.” Then her black eye flicked to something off-screen before it came back to land on me.

  Her gaze was not nearly as intense as Kalista’s, but I still wanted to look away. I had the strange urge to bow to this astute warrior even though I knew that would make me look stupid. There was a hell of a lot of knowledge in her stare.

  “Who’s this?” Danira spat out of the side of her mouth, and her one black eye looked me up and down in a way that made me feel as if she stood right in front of me.

  “This is Milton. He’s an adept,” Ariette replied. Once again, one long slender hand laid itself on my shoulder, and my shorts tightened between my thighs. If this was going to be a regular thing, I definitely needed to learn some damn self-control.

  “No shit, an adept!” Danira let out a laugh, a long airless sort of sound that reminded me of a cough. “Well, Milton, welcome aboard! Good job, Ariette.”

  I swore I caught the willowy elf beside me blush the slightest bit at the praise. Ariette bowed her head in gratitude and removed her beautiful hand from its place on my shoulder.

  “So, Milton, what can you do? Our last adept had the Hand of Neurons. Not so great, but not so bad either. If only he had the Hand of Intelligence, maybe he wouldn’t have been… well, that doesn’t matter now.” Danira waved away her thoughts before she turned her black eye back to me and smiled. “What’s your power?”

  “It’s, uh...” I stuttered. I wasn’t totally sure if I could just come out and say it, but the dead silence as all three women stared at me and waited,
made me think it would look even more awkward to not say anything. “The Hand of Blood, ma’am.”

  Danira paused, and I heard a chair creak through the speakers as she sat back. I could tell her arms were crossed, and that lone black eye narrowed at me. She pursed her lips, and my whole body began to vibrate with anxiety.

  Ariette and Kalista said nothing, but Kalista looked back and forth between Danira and me violently.

  My eyes met Ariette’s blue orbs, and there was a worry in her gaze that made my knees shake. Something felt off. The blonde warrior beside me turned back to Danira, and her full lips formed a thin line as she watched the elder warrior think something through. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity but was probably only a minute, Danira spoke. Her tone was grave, and her face held none of the joy it had moments ago.

  “I’ve never heard of an adept who had the Hand of Blood. Were you born with it, boy?” Danira asked harshly.

  My heart beat in my chest as Danira’s singular black eye stared at me. She didn’t blink once. I had two seconds to decide whether or not I should tell her the truth.

  If I told her the truth, she might not believe me, but if I lied and she figured it out, I was dead meat for sure. So yet again, I made a split second decision that could very well get me killed.

  “No, I was given it. By a fairy.” I lifted my chin and widened my stance as I hoped to make myself seem more commanding.

  Thankfully, Danira didn’t question me further. She gave us one stern nod.

  “We’ll discuss this more later. Head back to base. And Milton,” she paused and waited for me to make eye contact before she continued. “Welcome to the team.”

  The screen went black before it reverted back to a scene of the street. The police were still there, but it looked like they had barely made a dent in the clean-up. I could feel the eyes of the two women on me, and I met them both.

  Soft blue eyes that were almost expressionless looked at me unwaveringly. The violet ones next to her were narrowed slightly, both eyebrows drawn down above them.