by Samantha Bee
“Then she shouldn’t have run,” a rough voice growls from behind me. I turn slightly and sigh. Great, the angry one is back. I’m not a fan of any of these guys but after the way he left her in the bar bathroom, I just might be close to really despising this fucker.
I feel my eyes harden as I meet his eyes, burning with anger and resentment. I feel my own rear up in response. “If you left her in anywhere near the same condition you left her in last time, I will kill you,” I spit as he stops in front of me.
I remember the warning Scarlett gave me that night about what threats I make and I’m almost positive she didn’t mean it just as a joke. The thing is, I don’t care. I have no problem reverting to the ways I ran away from for her. In the two months I have known her, she’s ensnared me so thoroughly that I would do just about anything for her.
I’m at least a foot taller than Scarlett and close in height to the nice one but the angry one has at least a couple of inches on both of us. Big, angry fucker. I still don’t make my threat lightly, I wouldn’t make it if I didn’t have the courage and finesse to pull it off. There’s more to being deadly than brute strength.
He grinds his teeth, but I can see the flash of guilt in his eyes. At least he isn’t totally heartless even if he is an utter ass. His eyes flick to the nice one before returning to mine. “I only gave her the treatment she asked for.”
I tense but smooth out my features before I scowl back at him. That wouldn’t help the situation and I promised to help. I take a deep breath before calmly responding, “Scarlett is who she is. She’s never pretended to be anything else.” My eyes dart back and forth between the two as I continue, “She never lied, manipulated or pushed for more than you were willing to give. She was honest and upfront. Can you guys really say the same?”
They both flinch but I don’t react. I already knew based on what she had told me. She once had rules and they all twisted them, sidestepped them, and outright broke them. It may have ended up working out in their favor for a while, but it never would have lasted on such a weak foundation.
“He’s not wrong,” a weary, slurred voice comes from next to where the nice one is standing. How lovely, the messy one is joining the conversation now. At least he has some sense, even if I can smell the whiskey on him from here.
Both other men turn and look at him aghast, clearly not expecting him to speak, let alone agree with me. He struggles a bit as he sits himself upright, sighing the whole way. He scrubs his hands roughly over his face as we all wait, silently waiting for him to pull himself together.
“It’s weird as fuck that you call her Scarlett,” he starts, and I can’t keep the surprise off my face. That’s how she introduced herself to me and I’ve only called her that or pretty girl since. Not trying to get punched if I use my nickname for her.
“But you’re not wrong,” he continues. His eyes drag back and forth between the other two. “You both know it and Luca does too. You pushed too hard and got in her way...”
The angry one coughs, clearly trying to shut him up. The messy one throws him a dirty look and scoffs, “I’m not stupid. And you’re not really angry. You're hurt and covering it up which is no better than what Scar did.”
Scar. He’s right, that name somehow does suit her, but I find myself still fond of Scarlett. Especially if no one else calls her that. I can be a smug bastard when I want to be.
The nice one sighs, and I know he at least agrees with him. Having one of them on her side will make it a lot easier on her. I look over him again and grimace, even if he doesn’t seem the most reliable. The angry one’s eyes soften as he studies the messy one but as he sits next to him, he takes the coward’s way out and changes the subject instead of acknowledging the truth.
“Man, you gotta get it together. You can’t be like this when Roe gets here.”
The messy one huffs before looking down at his watch. “I’m going to go take a shower before they get here.”
The other two nod and I back up until I’m leaning against the wall once more. Scarlett must be dealing with the bossy one now. It’s clear he was ready to forgive her and take her back, I just wonder how much hell he’s going to give her first.
Where I’m standing, I have a clear view of the front door, the couch the other two are sitting on and can see peaks of the backyard through the living room. I don’t see any sign of her, even so, I keep finding myself stealing glances that way. The messy one leaves the room unassisted and I figure he must be more hungover than drunk like I first assumed. I hope he gets his shit together before Roe gets here.
A smile easily breaks across my face at the thought of that little girl. She’s just like her mom, easy to find yourself in the palm of her hand, and she doesn’t even realize it. I was shocked when Scarlett first told me about her and again when she let us meet but I’m glad she did.
Seeing Scarlett and Rowan together is like meeting a whole new her. She was softer, gentle, lighter, teasing and giggling and laughing. It speared something down in my core to see her that way. I wanted her to have that vibrancy in every aspect of her life but even as she relaxed with me, she never got to that same level of happiness that she has with her daughter.
Unfortunately, I think she needs these dumb fucks to make that happen. It’s a pill I’ll have to learn to swallow. I swear though, if the angry one keeps glowering at me the way he is, I just might bring my scalpel out to play first.
I meet his heavy gaze and grin, knowing it will piss him off because he wants my anger.
He growls and the nice one sighs. A lot of sighing going on with this bunch. I imagine they aren’t usually quite so melancholy.
“I knew she was lying about not fucking you,” the angry one hisses.
My smirk drops as my brows raise and I tilt my head to the side, studying him. Where did that thought come from? I shrug but let the question into my tone. “We haven’t?”
Both him and the nice one don’t bother to keep the surprise off either of their faces. Fuck. I guess if I thought the woman I loved had brought the new guy that she was fucking to meet me at her daughter’s birthday party, I would possibly be acting a bit like a jackass too.
I feel my attitude towards them soften. Marginally. They still have their own shit to makeup to her and I won't let it go until they do.
I throw them another bone. “She hasn’t had sex with anyone since she left.” I can’t say she hasn’t slept with anyone because she has slept in my arms more than once or twice. She’s fallen apart and let me hold her broken pieces together while she started the process of healing. She let me soothe some of the ache for her and at least my warmth kept most of her nightmares away.
She always looks more haggard after I work doubles and don’t see her for a few days. I know it’s because she doesn’t sleep as well. I convinced her to start sleeping here some nights so she could climb into bed with Rowan. It helped. It helped a lot, but it was still just a band aid to solving the bigger problem.
The surprise on their faces turns to unfiltered shock. Seeing the expression on the angry one, rises up my own beast at the thought of the last time she did have sex. I scoff as I narrow my eyes at him. “Well, I guess that isn’t entirely true.”
He grunts but the nice one turns to look at him and if I’m not mistaken, I see some betrayal in that look. I chuckle. “Of course, you didn’t tell them.” He’s glaring at me. I don’t care. It isn’t my job to cover up his sins.
He doesn’t answer, doesn’t look at the nice one, just redirects the conversation. Again. If I thought Scarlett was bad with avoidance, she’s got nothing on the angry one.
“If you aren’t fucking, then why are you here? What do you even do together?” Crude. A crude, idiotic jackass.
“She’s more than just a way to get your dick wet,” I sneer, repeating the same words I said to her when we first met. I was never lying about that. Do I want more with her? Feel her clenching around me and crying my name? Hell fucking yes. Who wouldn’t? Okay, I didn’t
really. Not when we met. I wasn’t interested in that. She is stunning, I always saw that, but I couldn’t feel anything for her other than a longing to diminish the pain I recognized in her eyes. Lust didn’t come into the picture until she let me in. Until I held her in my arms day after day and saw her soften at my touch, brighten with the sound of my voice. The lust grew moment by moment as I saw her healing and knew she was going to be okay. I couldn’t worry about that when I was scared one touch would shatter her.
I can see his jaw ticking as he wants to lash out at me but he’s the one who said it. Insinuated she’s just a hole. A means to an end. “I’m her friend, you insufferable twat,” I continue as the anger that's been simmering starts to boil at his disrespectful and callous words over her. “We hang out, play games, drink or watch movies. Sometimes all of the above. We talk, about music and books, goals, and fears. We talk about you fucking assholes and her regrets, her insecurities, and her doubts. We talk about Rowan and dancing. We smile and we laugh and sometimes she cries. It’s called friendship, maybe if you weren’t such a prick, you’d know something about it.” I end with a snap.
I can feel my chest heaving as my breath comes out in fast pants. I hadn't even realized just how worked up his question had gotten me until I let it all of my chest.
He looks like I’ve struck him. “You talk?” he whispers. This time his tone isn’t laced with insinuations but what I think is hurt. The anger in his gaze triples as he stares me down. Somehow this seemed to have been the wrong answer to help mend the fence between the two of them.
He looks ready to tear a strip off of me when a throat clearing has all eyes in the room dragging to the small beauty, I can’t even deny I’m falling for anymore.
I smile as I meet her eyes. She seems a shade more vibrant, like she reconnected with a piece of her missing soul. The bossy one seems calmer, more secure, more collected, and confident. He seems to be every inch the man Scarlett described to me. Strong, steadfast, loyal. It’s easier to not hate him now. All I need is for her to be good. As whole as she can be. I can already see how he helps her.
She meets my eyes as they both move towards me, she gives me a small smile, but I can see the questions in her eyes. Am I good? What did she just walk into? Are they okay? Will they forgive her?
As soon as she’s in arm’s reach, I snake my arms around her and pull her into my chest. She has no hesitation in wrapping her arms around me and squeezing me tight. I lean down and whisper into her ear. “The angry one wants to eat me. Will you protect me, pretty girl?”
She pulls away as laughter bubbles up out of her and spills from her lips as it grows in intensity. As if it started in just shock but then she lost control. I can’t help but grin. The other guys all have surprised but slightly amused expressions on their faces, but I know she needs this. She needed a safe release of all the excess emotion this day is bringing her.
She starts to settle as she wipes her eyes and slaps my chest, whispering back. “You know his name is Kade,” she scolds me.
I chuckle. “The angry one just suits him so much better though,” I tease. “You didn’t even have to ask who.” I point out. She’s right, I know all their names, but Luca is currently the only one I feel like has earned the respect needed to be more than just the bossy one. The nice one and the messy one aren’t so bad but they haven’t made things right with her yet. The angry one can suck my dick. I have a feeling I won’t use his name for a while.
“What the fuck are you two whispering about?” he snaps.
Before either of us can answer, the front door is thrown open.
“D!” a very sweet and high pitched little voice screams a second before I feel her little arms wrap around my legs. I chuckle as I pick Roe up and move my hand up to fist bump her. She giggles as she taps her knuckles against mine. Such an odd gesture but it’s one that makes her smile.
Her little motley crew isn’t far behind her. I pass her off to Scarlett as I fist bump with each of the boys before pulling Charlene in for a hug and taking some of the backpacks out of her hands. I hear Roe greeting each of the guys but can feel the weight of their gazes on my back as I help Charlene get the kids settled in. I know what they’re seeing. My comfort, my ease, my sense of rightness and belonging here. I’ve been here a lot with Scarlett and it’s almost like a second home now. Or a third after Scarlett’s place. I don’t try to tamper the smug satisfaction rolling off of me.
That’s right fuckers. You might want to get used to me, I’m here to stay.
Chapter Fourteen
Water rushes down my face as I try to shake myself off.
My head is pounding, and my stomach feels queasy. As much as I hate the way the alcohol makes me feel, I wish I had a bottle in my hand right now.
Luca is worried about me seeing Scar again, but the thing is, I don't blame her for leaving. Seeing her again isn't as hard for me as it is for them. I always understood why she ran, how pissed she was, how betrayed she felt. I saw it and I understood it. It sucks that she turned around and did the same thing to me, but I know she doesn't see it that way.
We all got lumped in together because of Kade and Luca's inaction and their sharp tongues when they spoke to her. I can't really be mad at them either though. Especially after I've seen just how far they've fallen since she's been gone. Neither of them are anywhere near the confident, able men I first met. Certainly not capable of going on any runs or doing anything to give me some sense of justice.
If I can't get my hands bloody, then I just want to drink enough to forget how fucking messed up my life is.
My sister. My sweet, beautiful, caring sister. Gone. Because of a selfish bastard.
I never had much love for my father, not since my mom died. I always knew he was prick. I just never expected even him to stoop so low. To sell her. Just how could anyone do that to their daughter? Their own flesh and blood? It makes me sick. It makes me want to rage. It makes me want to give up.
The alcohol at least drowns out the voices in my head. They might be a little more bearable if they would just tell me what I need to feel better. Is him being behind bars enough for me? Scar ensured that's where he was put. Luca couldn't even get to him if I wanted to. He tried. I just can't tell if I need him dead, if I need to be the one who kills him, watch as the life drains out of his eyes? Or is him spending the rest of his life rotting behind bars enough to soothe the demons screaming in my ears?
I couldn't fucking tell you. So, I drink. To drown them out, to drown out the pain, to forget who the fuck I am.
But fuck do I still feel awful. I rinse my hair out as I groan, feeling slightly more human, even as my head pounds and my stomach churns. Hopefully eating will help settle it. Fuck. I can't remember the last time I was this hungover.
I get out of the shower and wrap the towel around my waist before heading back into the guest room where I left my bag.
I'm still kind of out of it and I don't immediately hear the slow, deep breaths of someone trying to calm their racing heart. Not until a soft thud draws my eyes to the corner of the room where I find Scar leaning against the wall as she focuses on her breathing. I don't think she even realizes I'm here.
What the fuck do I say?
She's clearly having a moment. I can only imagine how overwhelming this day is turning out for her. She doesn't handle emotions very well, her own but also anyone else's. I smirk as I think about the way she just kept handing me more whiskey when I was breaking apart. Too bad I've been banned from the stuff today or I'd return the favor.
"Hey," I say but it comes out a little more like a question as I observe her.
She turns around sharply and gasps as she faces me. "Fuck." Her eyes drift down from my face to take in my bare chest. Her eyes follow a droplet of water as it travels down before reaching the towel at my waist. I feel her gaze trace down my chest like an icy finger, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake as the sensation sinks all the way down to my core.
She swallows
and it's the most clear headed I've felt since she left. Her green eyes flare as she snaps her head up to meet mine, I can't help but smirk. "Sorry," she chokes out. "I didn't realize you were in here."
My smirk drops as I take in her expression. Of course she's struggling to keep herself together after dealing with the other three. I give her a soft smile instead as I shrug. "You okay?" A part of me is pissed at her, feeling betrayed just like the others. A part of me aches for the hole she left in my life, taking my revenge, and putting it just out of reach. But the last part of me just feels for her, hurts for her, wants to protect her from the others' rage, to soothe the ache they started in her.
She scoffs, "Shouldn't I be asking you that?"
I tilt my head as I study her and she straightens herself up taller, slightly tensing as if she's gearing up for another onslaught of verbal beratement. I laugh a little, even though I don't feel much amusement. At least talking to her quiets the voices in my head. It's like they know she's able and willing to help me spill the blood they so desperately desire. "I get why you left," I admit to her.
She rears back like it was the last thing she expected me to say. I let out an amused snort. "Don't get me wrong, it sucked. You basically did to me what they did to you." A look of confusion passes her face and I nod. I knew she hadn't realized that. "You promised me revenge and then walked away from it."
She flinches as understanding dawns, but I continue before she has a chance to say anything. "But like I said, I understand. Just next time, take me with you?" I half joke, half plead with her. I've realized that I need the chance at revenge to function. Even more so now.
"There won't be a next time," she sighs and nods. "I promise." She gives me a small smile as she moves away from the wall and looks up at me through her lashes.
