The Complete Adventures of Victoria Neaves & Romney

by Michael White

  “Scans are a bit distant but everything seems normal.” said Romney and Victoria sighed. It was certainly looking as if it was going to be a long night.

  “Excellent.” she said, switching her position slightly for no reason other than to widen her view of the large wide roof upon which they were stood. It was, as before, empty of anyone other than them.

  “Did you speak to Viktor?” asked Romney, obviously keen to distract them both from their vigil.

  “Not yet.” she said, “I unfortunately got bogged down somewhat with Mister Tibbs. He was requesting that perhaps we could have a few mice sent in from town to, as he put it, “Keep his arm in”.”

  “What did you say?” asked Romney, chuckling.

  “I said no.” said Victoria, “Never heard the like of it. I told him he should be pleased just how efficient his eradication of all rodents on the property was and all he could say in reply was that he thought perhaps he would widen the radius of what he called his “Sphere of operation”.”

  “I wouldn’t like to be a mouse within a fifty-mile radius of the house then.” laughed Romney and Victoria giggled in reply.

  “Me neither.” she said, “He is certainly very good at what he does.”

  They settled into an easy silence, the arrival of vehicles along the drive now nearly non-existent as all of the guests were now no doubt reveling in the manor below, from where the music and the loud voices continued to be heard. Victoria waited another hour and then walked along the roof, checking all of the perimeters but finding nothing at all. It was another hour before Romney spoke.

  “Gone very quiet downstairs.” he said and Victoria rescanned the house below them. Her enhancements increased her hearing but she had not tuned in to the party as the noise would be too much for her.

  “It has.” she said slowly, scanning all the frequencies. “In fact the house seems to be almost in silence.” She reached the edge of the roof and jumped down into the darkness, her fall broken by the enhanced skeletal frame in her legs and back. As she approached the door of the mansion she could already see that and that there were several people slumped on the floor just inside it.

  “Hold your breath boss.” said Romney. “I am checking the air. Something isn’t right.” She nodded in acknowledgment. Her augmentations meant that she could hold her breath almost indefinitely.

  “Damn it!” she shouted as she reached the door and stepped inside, “I should have checked earlier.”

  “It isn’t the thief’s usual method.” said Romney, “You weren’t to know.”

  Inside the mansion every room was draped with bodies, the guests sprawled on the floor, all of them clutching at their throats, faces contorted.

  “Nerve gas.” said Romey, “A particularly fast one too. Almost instant I would estimate.”

  “One hundred percent fatal?” she asked.

  “Yes.” said Romney, though she had no real need to ask the question. The rooms were littered with bodies, the string quartet slumped across the floor, their instruments entwined with their corpses, the serving and waiting staff occupying the same spaces as their employers in death.

  Victoria stepped into the room, carefully stepping over bodies but pausing to look at several of the women as she went past.

  “Several have had necklaces and earrings removed.” she said.

  “How do you know?” asked Romney.

  “Their heads have been moved after death. As if they had been tugged.” she said, “The angle they are lying at is all wrong.”

  “Diamonds only.” said Romney as Victoria noticed a gaudy emerald necklace about the neck of one of the dead party-goers.

  “Yes.” said Victoria. “Give me a count Romney.” There was a brief pause.

  “Forty-seven men, thirty one women.” came the reply.

  Victoria sighed but as she did so her head shot up as a slight sound came from somewhere in the adjacent room. It sounded like a door closing and so she rose and ran quickly across the room and opened the doors just in time to see a figure ascending a wide staircase through an exceptionally wide archway at the other end of the room.

  Victoria raised her hand and a bright blue energy beam flashed across the room, shattering the wall by the staircase but already the figure was gone. She ran across the room and began to climb the staircase, keeping close to the wall as she did so, making herself a smaller target.

  “The roof is not far above, boss.” said Romney. “This is the first floor, and there’s only the second and then the roof.” Victoria edged around the bend in the staircase as she heard from above the loud clatter of what sounded like a door or hatch onto the roof being forced open. She increased her pace and as she rounded the next bend she saw as she suspected that the exit to the roof was open, pale blue moonlight shining down from above.

  “Careful boss.” said Romney, “You’re a sitting duck the minute you poke your head up through that hatch.”

  “I know.” she said, “But it doesn’t look like I have any choice.”

  Slowly she climbed the small ladder that led up and edged her head up into the cool night air. She looked around quickly but could see nothing. She raised herself up a little bit more, and then more. Still nothing. With a spring she jumped onto the roof, the pulse beam built into her hand scanning the roof to no avail.

  “Empty.” Said Romney. “Scans show nothing.”

  Victoria walked across the roof towards the chimney stack, her hand still outraised, her legs ready to throw her out of harm's way, but there was nothing. She walked around the chimney and stopped suddenly, for in front of her was a tall man, one foot on the edge of the gutter, the other on the brick parapet. He looked to all the world like a man out for a gentle stroll.

  “Boss.” warned Romney. “Be careful. Be very careful. Every scan that I am running on him insists that he is not there. That we are alone on the roof.”

  “Good evening.” said the man nonchalantly, his voice confident, and well-spoken; aristocratic almost. “A pleasant night for a stroll, is it not?”

  Victoria looked at the man closely. She scanned him too, but as Romney had warned her he was invisible to any scan she threw at him. He was however still stood in front of her, looking at her as if she was some strange curiosity. He was dressed in the manner of an aeronaut captain, thick leather gloves and a jacket of a brown colour leading to long dark leather trousers, holsters at his hips and a wide, brass buckled belt at his waist. The most curious affection however was that he was wearing a shaded pair of spectacles on his face similar to those worn by some people to shade their eyes from the sun. Victoria could not help but think that they looked rather out of place in the moonlight.

  He smiled and walked towards her but Victoria moved her arm up to point at him and a tight blue beam shot into the darkness, leaving a small puckered hole in the wide shoulder of his jacket. He stopped moving instantly, and stepped back towards the edge of the roof.

  “I say.” he smiled, “No need really for that. I am not going to put up a struggle you know.”

  “That was just a warning.” said Victoria, watching him carefully as she drew closer. “Next time if I have to, I won’t miss.”

  “Oh I believe you.” said the man, “But I am remiss. We have not been introduced.”

  “Oh I think there will be plenty of time for that.” she smiled as the man flicked his hand forward and a small business car landed at her feet. In large black letters it read, “You have rather sadly been relieved of your most precious item(s). Yours, The Clockwork Thief.” The letter “s” was intact.

  Victoria felt rattled. The man could move impossibly fast - she had not even registered that his hand had moved.

  “Just an affectation of mine.” he smiled, the shaded glasses reflecting the moonlight. He leaned forward and Victoria leaned towards him as he smiled and spoke a word in her ear.

  Victoria felt her legs give way as lightning raged in her head, and tipping forward she fell forwards and toppled from the roof to the
ground ninety feet below.

  ***

  “Rest completed.” she heard Viktor say and he tried to rise but found that she could not do so.

  “Where am I?” she gasped as another figure moved into her sight.

  “Sebastian?” she asked and the smart looking young man smiled and nodded, leaning in close to her. She knew that Romney did not like to become corporeal. He always complained when he did so, but when he did it was usually an emergency. When he did manifest himself in such a manner however for some reason known only to himself he always took the shape of a young dark haired man with floppy hair, and insisted on being called Sebastian. It was him standing looking at her with concern now, leaning over her with a frown upon his face.

  “Yes.” he said, “You are safe, boss. I had to manifest to get you home. I don’t know what that clown did to you on the roof but your internal Babbage computational engine crashed completely. You fell off the roof and shut down.”

  “Damage?” she gasped, looking around and seeing with relief that she was in her cellar on a large frame that was designed to run diagnostics on her augmentations. She had insisted on setting it up in the cellar primarily as it was out of view, and now she felt glad to be able to look around and see things she recognised.

  “None that we can see.” said Sebastian, “Your frame helped you absorb the fall. My real worry is what he did to you. Just before you fell he leaned forward and whispered something to you.”

  “Yes.” she said.

  “Do you remember what it was?” he asked. Victoria searched though her memory and then also accessed her computational engine. In reality it was impossible for her to actually forget anything, but when she searched for what the man on the roof had said to her she was at a complete loss.

  “I cannot remember.” she whispered.

  “That’s impossible.” said Sebastian.

  “I know.” she replied. “There are a few things that concern me. First of all he seemed to have the ability to move much quicker than even me, which is impossible. Also none of either your or my scans could find him. Then he managed to short circuit me somehow.”

  “Something odd going on.” said Sebastian as Viktor moved forward and smiled at her.

  “It will be okay, miss Neaves” he smiled, his front teeth somewhat disconcerting she thought. “We will run a few more checks. Romney - sorry Sebastian has told me not to go while he de-manifests himself. Just have some sleep.”

  “I think I will.” she said and as soon as she said it her eyes closed.

  ***

  “So you could find no errors whatsoever?” she said, sitting in her living room and looking out onto the neatly trimmed lawn outside. She could not help but notice that the two remaining plant pots on the window ledge had been moved again.

  “None.” said Romney. “Everything checks out fine. Which is odd because quite clearly it is not.” Victoria felt concerned but was also glad that Romney was back to his normal place. It seemed more normal, somehow.

  “Which leaves us with a problem.” she said, “because clearly this man had abilities beyond mine, can cause me to suddenly shut down as if I was some old rusting Babbage engine, and not only that but he has just murdered seventy-eight people for no reason other than to steal some of their jewelry.”

  “I did manage to speak to Inspector Vaillant whilst I was corporeal.” said Romney, “That he wasn’t best impressed with our performance is probably something that I don’t have to tell you.”

  “I cannot say I am surprised.” she muttered, “Is there any sign of the reports about the automation failure during the diamond robbery that Lord Hillingdon commissioned?”

  “If there is he didn’t mention it to me.” Said Romney. “Oh and as far as the Inspector is concerned I am your younger brother by the way.” Victoria laughed.

  “You should have just told him the truth.” she said.

  “Well I thought if I did it would only confirm to him just how bad things were really.”

  “I imagine so.” she said quietly.

  As she gazed out of the window Viktor entered and placed several letters on the table before her.

  “I vill make ze tea.” he said glumly, “I know how you English people enjoy ze recuperative powers of tea.”

  As he left the room she glanced through the letters and cast them back down onto the table.

  “Bills and requests to find lost dogs or cats.” she sighed. She looked back to the garden as movement caught her eye and she saw the somewhat bedraggled figure of Inspector Vaillant making is way up the path.

  “Your admirer is here.” mocked Romney in her mind and she laughed.

  “He is not my admirer!” she exclaimed, “His visit today I suspect will have more to do with how poorly we performed the other night.”

  There was a knock on the door and shortly after Viktor announced Vaillant’s arrival and led him into the room.

  “I vill make another one of ze cups.” he said and after glancing suspiciously at the plant pots on the window ledge he left the room again.

  “I have been to the city.” fronted the Inspector, “Needless to say, the top brass are less than happy.”

  “I take full responsibility of course…” she began, but Vaillant held up his hand for her to stop.

  “Victoria.” he said solemnly. “I have worked with you several times now. I know that whatever did happen was not your fault.”

  “I also know that you will do everything in your power to make it right.” he paused as she nodded in acknowledgement. “That is why I bring the results of the automaton failure that lord Hillingdon requested.”

  “Excellent.” said Victoria as the Inspector pulled an envelope out of his pocket and extracting the letter he placed it on the table.

  “It is quite a long report.” said Vaillant, “But in short, the intruder gave a verbal command to one of the automata in the room that caused it to destroy the other two automata and then shut itself down.”

  “Effective.” said Victoria, “What was the command?” The Inspector picked up the report and opening it leafed through the pages until he found what he was looking for. Slowly he began to read.

  ‘“63656173652066756e6374696f6ea” he read slowly and carefully.

  “Cease function.” said Victoria. “I see.”

  “Well I will be damned!” said Vaillant, “How on earth did you know that?”

  “It is hexadecimal.” she said, “One of the basic languages of all Babbage engines. One of many, of course, but quite distinct from others.”

  “Well at least we know it wasn't the same phrase that he said to you.” said Romney in her mind.

  “How so?” she asked.

  “Well you haven't crashed this time for a start.” he said and she was forced to agree.

  “To an automaton the command to “cease function” is very much too vague an order.” said Victoria telepathically, “Obviously this particular device took the command to cease the function of the other two automata and then cease its own function.”

  “Fifth circle demonology.” sighed Romney. “Bloody rubbish, boss. I have met worms with more nouse.”

  “This is very interesting, Inspector.” she said. “Thank you for taking the time to bring it to us.”

  “My pleasure.” he said. “My main concern however is where to go from here.”

  “I am just consulting with Romney.” she smiled. It was something that she rarely did, explaining the internal monologue she could be undertaking with her demon assistant, but the Inspector was more familiar to her now and although he could not hear Romney she felt the need to explain what she was actually doing.

  “Quite.” said Vaillant, not quite sure what his response should be to such a situation and so that was all that he said and then he was quiet.

  “It is how he shut me down.” said Victoria, “Crashed my computational engines. It must be that.”

  “Difficult.” said Romney, “Your systems are better protected than someone
just shooting a load of old hexadecimal at you to crash your systems.”

  “Load of old hexadecimal?” mocked Victoria, smiling broadly as Vaillant made his best efforts to look as if he was just staring out of the window onto the lawn. “Well it is something similar.” she finished.

  “It has to be a verbal command.” said Romney. “With your permission then I shall run a search of your conversation history over say the last three months and see if I can find something - anything really - that looks odd.”

  “Well I am perfectly capable of doing that myself.” she said.

  “Yes boss.” said Romney, “But if you did happen to come across the command it is entirely possible that if you saw it it could crash your systems again and we would be none the wiser what it was. It does seem to be able to erase itself once it has been run.”

  “I never thought of that.” she smiled. “Clever.”

  “Thanks.” sad Romney. “We will do it tonight.”

  “So Inspector.” said Victoria, returning to her guest. “There are several questions that we need to address. But before you do that we need a big old house and a few mentions to the press about a nonexistent diamond. I intend to set a trap.”

  “Wonderful.” said the Inspector, “The chase is afoot, I fear!”

  ***

  “I found it.” said Romney as Victoria opened her eyes and looked at the sun streaming in through the open bedroom curtains. As she watched the ghostly shape of Fanelda the maid floated across the room and opened the windows and then disappeared through the wall. “But you ain’t going to like it.”

  “Why?” she asked, propping herself up on her pillows.

  “Because he knows how to access your computational engine. To embed commands there.”

  “That means he has contacts in very high places.” she said.

  “Yes.” said Romney. “And some very secret places too.”

  “Is it the government?” she asked, remembering how she had been abducted by the British government and changed forever without her agreement.