This Ain't Love: MC Romance (BDMC: Second Generation Book 1)

by A. M. Myers

  I have to protect them.

  That’s what this is all about.

  Turning toward the bedroom where Diego is sleeping, another wave of pain rocks through me and I place my hand on my chest, wishing I could claw my own heart out so this didn’t hurt so fucking bad.

  “I’m so sorry,” I whisper into the quiet house, my lip trembling as I grip my t-shirt in my fist. “I love you so much.”

  Before I can stop myself, I turn toward the door and grab Diego’s truck keys off of the counter along with the map Dominic sent over. There is a spot by the river downtown that is circled in red and on the bottom of the page are written instructions, leading me to my demise. My stomach churns violently as I take one last look at my son, indulging in one more moment with him, before I rip my gaze away and walk out of the door. The night is quiet, almost like it feels the tension of the situation and even the normal croaking of frogs from the creek and the chirps of grasshoppers are missing. It certainly matches the ominous feeling building inside me a weight settles in my chest and a chill slithers down my spine.

  In the truck, I hold my breath as the engine fires to life, hoping that Diego will be too exhausted from midnight feedings to hear it but I don’t wait around to find out. With the headlights off, I slowly back out of the driveway, my heart thundering in my chest and my stomach twisting incessantly. A wave of nausea swallows me up but I grip the steering wheel tightly in both hands and try to breathe through it.

  Fuck.

  I can’t do this.

  Shaking my head, I grit my teeth again and focus on the dark road in front of me as I push those thoughts from my mind. I have to do this. There is no other option for me, not when Dominic has threatened to kill every single person I love for my carelessness. So, I can’t turn back, can’t give into the fear pulsing through me like a heartbeat because when it strips everything else away, I brought this on myself. If just once in the past fourteen years I had faced my shit and dealt with it, I probably wouldn’t have been in that alley when Luca and Gio killed that poor man. There is no one else to blame for riling a man like Luca up and I have to pay penance for my sins. It’s as simple as that. These are the consequences for my actions and it’s time to own up to them like a big girl.

  When I finally reach the front gate of the compound, I press the button clipped to Diego’s visor and wait for it to slide open, my entire body shaking. The prospect peeks out from the guard post, a scowl on his face, and I force a smile to my face as I wave at him. He studies me for a moment but I don’t wait to see what he will do as the gate finally opens all the way and I drive through. Shit. He’s probably going to call Diego immediately, which is exactly what I don’t need so I have to put as much distance between me and the compound as I can. Glancing over my shoulder, I press the gas pedal down and the truck rumbles as it surges forward. The gate is closing behind me and I turn back to the road, gasping for breath as I pray for more time.

  God, what a joke.

  I’ve been praying for more time since the moment DJ was born but no one is listening or they didn’t care. Either way, I still ended up here, running from the man I love to a monster who I have no doubt will kill me eventually. Sure, he promised not to but what other option is there? He can’t ever release me with what I know, the things I saw, and at some point, I will stop being useful to him. That’s just a fact.

  “As long as they are safe,” I mumble into the silence of the truck. Just as quickly as Diego and our baby enter my thoughts, I push them out again. I don’t want to; I hate every second of it but I have to focus right now and getting lost in my pain won’t help.

  Bright lights flood my vision and I slam my foot onto the brakes, crying out as the truck screeches to a stop. My chest heaves and my heart thunders in my ears as I glance over my shoulder, throwing the truck in reverse. Two dark SUVs race up behind me before jerking to a stop, completely blocking me in and a sob echoes through the cab. Turning forward, my breath catches in my throat as I watch three men jump out of the vehicles in front of me. They rush toward me and I can’t stop the tears from dripping down my cheeks as I stare at my hands gripping the steering wheel so tightly that all the color drains from my skin.

  Things start moving in slow motion and I feel a little like I’m floating above my body as one of the men reaches my door, yanking it open and grabbing me. He pulls me from the truck as one of the other men stands on my side. They each grab an arm and begin hauling me toward the SUVs as the third man jumps in the truck and moves it to the side of the road. Pebbles scatter out in front of me as I try and fail to find my footing, stumbling along the road as I’m dragged closer and closer to what I’m sure is my end. The third man joins us, the map Dominic sent in his hand and once we get to the SUVs, a bag is thrown over my head and I’m shoved into a seat. My entire body shakes as two of the men climb in on either side of me and I lay my hands in my lap, squeezing them together as I focus on each breath I’m pulling into my lungs in an effort to calm myself.

  This is okay.

  It wasn’t the plan but it makes sense that Dominic wouldn’t want any crumbs leading back to him. Nothing has changed except for the meeting place.

  As we start driving, I try my best to keep track of each turn but it’s impossible and a part of me thinks they are driving in circles to throw me off. Not that it matters. I won’t be escaping because then Dominic would come after everyone else but some instincts are harder to ignore than others. All of my fear and pain drop away in an instant, allowing me to become blessedly numb and my body slumps as I take a deep breath. This is it. My fate is waiting for me at the end of this car ride and there is nothing I can do to stop it so my only choice is to give in. Despite whatever happens to me from here on out, I can’t feel like I failed or that I gave up. What I’m doing is to keep everyone I love safe and I just have to keep telling myself that. I imagine Diego with our son, raising him to be the kind of man I could be proud of, and I see my sister, safe from a madman she doesn’t even know exists.

  I think it will probably be hardest for her. In Ria’s eyes, I’ll just be missing and she’ll have no clue what happened to me or why I ran. The last time I talked to her a couple of days ago, I told her how happy I was and I couldn’t stop gushing about my perfect baby boy so none of this will make any sense. Maybe Diego will tell her that I was just too broken to love him or that I couldn’t handle being happy and I wish more than anything that I could tell him it isn’t true. When he asked me to marry him, all I could do was say yes, despite knowing that I’d have to leave him, because I needed him to know that if given the opportunity, I would commit my life to his in a heartbeat.

  And I guess maybe I have, in a way, by sacrificing myself to save him.

  The SUV comes to a stop, dragging me from my thoughts as the doors open and I’m ripped from my seat. I stumble as I’m pulled along, trying to get my bearing but it’s no use with the bag still over my head and this grabby asshole tossing me all over the place. We come to a stop and the bag is yanked off my head. Lights blind me and I squint, holding my hand up in front of my face as my eyes adjust. The mansion from Smith’s surveillance photos appears before me, the same mansion Streak flagged after triangulating the cell phone towers and I suck in a breath. It’s the most obnoxious thing I’ve ever seen and a part of me wonders how one man could need all this.

  “Hello, Isabelle.”

  My gaze snaps to a man standing at the top of three stairs, a hint of a smile on his face that looks more sinister than friendly. The suit adorning his fit body is impeccable and his salt and pepper hair give him a disguised look. Fine wrinkles line his face but they just make him more attractive, giving him a life well-lived look. The evil shining in his eyes is hard to miss though, and it contradicts everything else. My stomach sinks. It’s not hard to see why everyone is so scared of this man. He gives off serial killer energy and that’s when he has a smile on his handsome face so I can’t imagine how terrifying he is when he’s angry.

  �
�Dominic, I presume?”

  He nods. “Indeed. Welcome to my home.”

  I don’t know what to say to that. What the hell do you say to your abductor after he welcomes you to his multi-million dollar mansion with a smile on his face? It’s almost like that ridiculously hot movie about the Italian mobster Ali made me watch a while back. Except it’s not because this man isn’t obsessed with me and he would probably kill me the first time I mouthed off to him. Something I need to remember. It could be a problem or come in handy depending on what he plans to do with me.

  “Release her,” Dominic snaps to the man holding me and his hands fall away from my body immediately. Turning back to me, Dominic smiles. “Please follow me, Isabelle.”

  My nerves grate at the sound of my full name tumbling from his lips but I keep it to myself as I walk up the steps to meet him. Once I’m standing next to him, he places a hand at the small of my back. His touch chills my skin and I take a deep breath, wishing it was Diego’s hand on me instead as Dominic leads me into the house. The interior is even more ostentatious than the interior but I can’t focus on the gleaming white marble floors or the soaring arched ceilings above me as Dominic guides me deeper into the property. We step out into a large courtyard with a long skinny swimming pool right in the middle that he bypasses as he moves me to the other side of the space. When we get back inside, we’re in a long hallway with doors every few feet. Each door has a little square window, two feet by two feet, near the top, and I peek in one as we pass, spotting a woman curled up into a ball on a small, simple bed.

  Oh, fuck.

  Further down, two more guards wait next to an open room and my foot gets caught on the floor. I stumble, every cell in my body screaming at me to turn and run as fast as I can but I know it’s no use. Even if I could manage to get free of this maze of a house and get away from the property, Dominic would just go after Diego or DJ or Ali or…

  All the people I love, all the people I’m saving, float through my mind, one at a time and I nod to myself as I regain my footing, walking toward the door with determination. Whatever this is, I’ll face it with my chin held high. Once we get to the room, Dominic stands back with the guards and gestures for me to go inside. My chest feels heavy as I step into the room, taking a moment to scan the small space. There isn’t much here - a simple metal bed frame with a mattress and plain white sheets, a desk with a candle in the corner, a toilet, and a sink. Honestly, it looks like a jail cell which seems fitting.

  Turning back to Dominic, I arch a brow. “Can I ask what you intend to do with me now?”

  “No,” he answers, shaking his head as he walks into the room. The guards follow him and I retreat, backing up until my ass hits the wall but he just smiles as he glances over his shoulder and nods. The guards rush around him, completely synchronized and grab my arms, dragging me to the bed as I scream and fight against them. Dominic chuckles but it’s his words that stop me dead in my tracks.

  “The men do like it when they fight.”

  All of the air rushes out of my lungs and my eyes widen as the implications of his statement slam into me.

  The men?

  What men?

  Oh, holy fuck.

  What the hell is this?

  My mind spins as I think about all the doors in the hallway. Is there a girl just like me in each room? And if there is, what the hell are they doing to them?

  Distracted by the bombardment of questions, I don’t fight the guards as they pin me down to the bed and lift my shirt up to reveal my stomach. Dominic pulls a lighter out of his pocket and something else that I can’t make out and I stare up at him as the lighter clicks and the flame appears. He holds it over the other object and my heart jumps into my throat when I see the metal crown he’s heating up.

  Oh my God, no.

  Is he going to brand me?

  My strength returns full force and I jerk against the guards’ grip on me but no matter how hard I fight, they are stronger. They shove my face into the mattress as one of them pulls my shirt up higher, over my bra.

  “No!”

  Dominic tsks. “This will be worse if you flail, Isabelle.”

  “Don’t do this, please,” I beg, peeking up at him as he walks over to me and sighs but he doesn’t give me an answer. He simply gives the guards another unspoken command and they press more of their body weight into me, pinning me to the bed and I can’t even struggle anymore. A sob bubbles out of me and I shake my head, pleading with him to not do this to me. If he hears me, he makes no indication. His hand presses against my side, just under my ribs, and then pain blooms through my body as he presses the metal to my skin. The scent of my own flesh burning stings my nose and I scream, trying to free myself but between the three of them, I’m completely trapped. The searing pain tears through my side and I can’t stop crying out as tears fall into the mattress below me. It goes on forever, the pain, the pressure of their bodies, the sizzle of my skin as it burns, and then finally, I’m free. As soon as their hands are off me, I fall to the floor, sobbing and gasping for breath as the pain pulses through me, so intense that my vision blurs.

  “I’ll have someone come in and bandage that up soon,” he tells me, a frown on his face. “I was unaware that you delivered your son via C-section so you’ll have to stay here until that heals. Don’t worry though. We have a doctor on staff for all the girls and once you get the all-clear, we’ll move you to the club.”

  He turns and leaves the room without another word, his guards hot on his heels and once I’m alone, I throw my head back on the bed and let the tears fall freely. I don’t want to examine his statement or try to figure out what it means right now so I don’t, pushing away all thoughts as I let myself fall into a pit of despair that I know I’ll never get out of.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Diego

  Ringing jerks me from sleep and I groan as I reach over to the bedside table and swipe my phone off the top before pressing it to my ear.

  “Yeah?” I say as I reach out for Izzy but the other side of the bed is empty and I sigh, running a hand over my face. She must have gotten up to feed the little man a while ago because the sheets are cold beneath my fingers but as soon as I deal with whatever this is, I’ll go relieve her.

  “Hey, Smoke,” Joe, the club’s newest prospect, says on the other end of the line. “Listen… I wasn’t sure if I should call you… I mean, it’s not like she’s a prisoner here but…”

  “Just spit it out, Joe,” I growl, sitting up in bed as his words slowly sink in. She isn’t a prisoner? What the hell does he mean by that? Throwing the blanket off my legs, I move to the edge of the bed.

  “Well, your ole lady just left the compound in your truck about ten minutes ago… like I said, I didn’t know if I should call and then I thought, better safe than sorry, you know?”

  My mind spins. “She left?”

  “Yeah,” he answers, his voice tentative. “I thought maybe she was going to get diapers or something but figured I should check in. I don’t know…”

  “Thanks, Joe,” I snap, hanging up on him before he can answer. I’m sure he’s used to it, though - it’s all part of being a prospect and you have to earn your place with the club. He’s only been with us for about a year so he hasn’t gotten there yet which means he doesn’t get the same respect as fully patched members.

  Standing, I dial Izzy’s number and pace back and forth across the bedroom as I wait for her to answer. If we needed something for the baby, why wouldn’t she just wake me up and ask me to go get it? She knows Dominic is still after her and it’s not fucking safe for her to be out on her own but she’s so goddamn stubborn. I swear, I’m gonna spank her ass raw when I find her. The call goes to her voice mail and I clench my fist as I pull the phone away from my ear. A tingling sensation races over my skin and I turn toward the bedroom door, yanking it open. DJ’s swing is gently swaying in the corner of the living room and he is fast asleep but Izzy is nowhere to be found.

  I sca
n the room and my gaze lands on a piece of paper sitting on the kitchen island. Next to it is Izzy’s phone. My heart drops and I charge across the space, ripping the paper off the counter and staring down at the two simple sentences that rip my heart out of my chest.

  Diego,

  I’m so sorry.

  I love you more than you know.

  What?

  She left me?

  She loves me but she still left me?

  How in the hell does that make any sense?

  Dropping the note back onto the island, I grab her phone and tap on the screen. A photo of DJ and me is set as her wallpaper and I stare at it for a second before shaking my head. No. This doesn’t make any damn sense.

  Why in the hell would she leave me?

  Why would she agree to marry me and then just run off?

  Fuck.

  Maybe I jumped the gun.

  Maybe I wanted too much, too soon, and after having time to think it all over, she freaked.

  But why wouldn’t she tell me?

  And would she really leave her son behind, too?

  Setting her phone back down on the counter, I turn to look at DJ and memories of the past five days flicker through my mind. Not once did I get any hint or indication that she was unhappy or panicking so I can’t bring myself to believe that she chose to leave us. It just doesn’t make sense. There were a few moments where I saw that fear in her eyes but that’s understandable with everything going on. Dominic King is still out there and he’s still a threat to her. That fact alone is enough to get me moving. No matter what happens between her and I, I still promised to protect her and keep her safe from that monster so that’s exactly what I’m going to do.