Olivia's Awakening

by Ronica Black

  “Happy birthday,” she said, the usual confidence in her words absent. “Molly invited me.”

  “Oh.” That explained, not only her presence, but her obvious anxiousness about it as well. She had come out of obligation, probably uneasy about having to tell Molly no. Olivia glanced away from her, hurt by the realization and upset at herself for feeling that way.

  “Aaron invited me,” Jake said, also with a rather guarded smile. His all-knowing eyes held hers, silently letting her know he was aware of the awkward situation but that she had his support regardless. He gave her a wink and sipped his water, and she was so grateful for him at that moment, she wanted to hug him so hard his bones would break. If only she could. If only he could voice his support out loud, to reassure her, to tell her to hang on. But he couldn’t. He just sat looking at her in his purple V-neck T-shirt and his perfectly styled hair. Olivia couldn’t help but notice how much he and Eve looked alike with their blond locks, golden tans, and carefully chosen outfits. They were an exceedingly beautiful pair with extremely big hearts, and they both had an inner access to her that no one else ever had. By all accords, it should’ve been a really happy moment, with her heart full and carefree and her world dancing and bright. But it wasn’t. They were obviously just as uneasy as she was. Jake because he knew all about her last encounter with Eve. And Eve because of the way that last encounter had turned out. Still, she wondered, how did things get this way? How did they end up like this? How did they end up here, staring at each other uncomfortably across a table at a birthday dinner?

  “We had to get in your phone,” Aaron said. “But I swear I only looked at your contacts.”

  “Thankfully,” Molly said, crossing her arms proudly, “I remembered your password.”

  “When did you—oh, right.” She’d given it to Molly one day when they were out shopping. She’d needed her grocery list on her phone. So, she’d given Molly her password while she kept shopping, putting items in the cart. Molly read the list aloud and then returned the phone to her purse quickly. She hadn’t had time to look at anything else, and Olivia never worried that Molly might remember the password. She looked at Aaron, hoping he hadn’t seen all the texts and photos she’d saved from Eve. She just hadn’t been able to delete them.

  Besides, she didn’t think she could ever just erase Eve. Not her words or her photos. Not any part of her for that matter.

  “I wanted you to have the best birthday ever,” Molly said. “With the people who love you the most.”

  Olivia kissed her temple. “Thank you, sweetie.”

  “Are you happy?”

  “Yes. I’m happy.”

  Molly furrowed her brow. “You’re smiling but you look sad.”

  Olivia wrapped her arm around Molly and reassured her. “I’m not sad, silly. Just surprised is all. This is all very unexpected.”

  “But in a good way, right?”

  “Right.”

  Molly only knew what she’d been told and what she’d seen. She knew that Eve was a very good friend and that they cared about each other very much. And she’d seen them together that night at the house, laughing and joking together as they’d watched the movie and talked and munched on microwave popcorn. Molly had seen and no doubt felt the love they had for each other, even if she didn’t quite sense or understand just how deep that love went. She had obviously enjoyed being with them because she’d asked to see Eve for the following two weekends, confused as to why Olivia wouldn’t even try to invite her over. Olivia had just told her that Eve was very busy with work. She hadn’t known what else to do.

  Their waiter arrived and Olivia hoped that Molly would move on to another topic and that she’d somehow be able to get through the afternoon. He took their order and brought their drinks, and everyone chatted except for Olivia, who sat quietly watching. Jake, it seemed, would be no problem. He talked with Aaron, and when he did look at her, it was to smile or wink. He knew she was devastated and confused about what to do with Eve. So, he’d done what he always did. He gave her the best advice he had, encouraging her to go talk to her, because he was pretty sure that Eve had just panicked in seeing Kenny. He said it would’ve freaked any lesbian out to suddenly be faced with a girlfriend’s ex-husband or boyfriend, especially if he acted like they were somehow still connected or together. And in addition to that, Eve was the only woman Olivia had ever been with, so Eve might have always worried, subconsciously or not, that there was a chance Olivia might, at some point, want to go back to men. The whole thing, according to Jake, was like a lesbian’s worst nightmare.

  She stirred her iced tea with her straw, quietly observing while Eve was listening to Molly. She was paying close attention to her and seemed to be enjoying herself. Eve was very good with her, and she obviously cared about her. It almost made Olivia tear up as she watched them interact. Molly would be heartbroken if she never saw Eve again. Olivia understood that feeling all too well, and she prayed against all odds that things didn’t turn out like that. She prayed that somehow, someway, Eve would be in their lives for a long time to come.

  “I hope we aren’t too late to join the fun,” a male voice said from Aaron’s end of the table.

  Everyone turned and Olivia felt her chin drop. Her mother and father stood next to Aaron, holding a wrapped gift.

  Chapter Thirty-seven

  Oh, my fucking God.

  Shock, panic, and whatever else anyone could possibly feel in a similar situation caused Olivia to stiffen in her chair. She was still and composed on the outside, which she found odd considering nothing but total chaos was taking over the inside.

  Facing death, she reasoned, would be better than her current position.

  And to add to the tension that was already hanging in the air, no one said anything. Not a word. Aaron looked as shocked as she did, and Molly seemed to share her preference in facing death based on the way she had her head in her hand, staring down at the table. There was no way she would’ve invited them. They were the fun killers, the party poopers.

  Her father seemed to sense everyone’s confusion.

  “Molly told us all about her big plans for a surprise birthday dinner, so we decided to surprise Olivia too.”

  “But you live in Rocky Point,” Molly said, rubbing her forehead. “You said at my birthday you wouldn’t be back in the States until Christmas.”

  Olivia’s father continued, giving Molly a pat on the shoulder.

  “Well, a friend asked me to play in a golf tournament at the last minute, so we said, what the heck? Let’s go play golf and wish Olivia a happy birthday, too.” He kissed Olivia’s cheek as he handed over the present.

  “So, happy birthday,” he said. “I hope we aren’t imposing.”

  She hugged him from her seat. “It’s nice of you to think of me,” she said. She just wished it had been any other day but this one.

  Her mother did the same as her father, kissing her cheek and wishing her a happy birthday, though she was more reserved and formal, with her rigid posture and put-upon smile. They took the two seats closest to Olivia. Her mother, across from Olivia on the bench, and her father at the end of the table to her right.

  Their choice of where to sit was as perfectly innocent as their arrival, but still just as nerve-racking. Because her mother, the ever-hunting, ever-seeking aggressive bird of prey, was now sitting right next to Eve, causing Olivia to almost have a coronary.

  Molly tugged on Olivia’s sleeve and whispered in her ear.

  “I didn’t think they would come. Honest, I didn’t.”

  “I know, hon. It’s okay.”

  But things were far from okay. Her mother introduced both herself and Olivia’s father to Jake and Eve, and Olivia could tell by the look on her mother’s face, she was confused as to who they were, never having seen them before.

  “You’re Olivia’s friends, then?” her mother asked right away.

  “I go to school with her,” Jake said. “And we study together.”

  Her
mother nodded and then looked to Eve.

  “And I—” Eve suddenly flushed, and Olivia did as well. Just what was it that Eve did with her? Oh, right, have wild, crazy, passionate, mind-blowing sex. Olivia stared at the table, unable to look at Eve, and massaged her temple.

  “Work out with her,” Eve finally finished. “We work out together.” She quickly grabbed her water and drank like she was parched. Her nervousness was as unusual as it was obvious, and Olivia only grew more anxious, knowing that if Eve, who was normally walking, talking confidence, was reacting to the heavy weight of the moment, then this entire birthday celebration was seriously fucked.

  Olivia looked to Aaron for some sort of help, but he had assumed Molly’s earlier posture of sitting with his head in hand. He knew how fucked up the situation was, and she knew he was no doubt worried about just how much more fucked up it could get.

  “Eve’s a personal trainer,” Molly said. “She kicks serious butt.”

  “Oh,” Olivia’s mother said. She smiled but it was hardly genuine.

  “She said she can bench press Auntie Liv. She’s that strong.”

  Oh, dear God. My mother is literally picturing Eve lifting and manhandling me at this very moment.

  I’m going to die. I am. I’m going to die.

  And apparently, Jake was picturing something similar.

  He coughed into his hand, trying to hide his laughter, and sipped his water. He turned his head, refusing to look at her.

  Aaron, who had looked up, was now as red as Eve and he, too, was avoiding her gaze.

  Her mother was studying and smoothing the back of her hands, her discomfort and disapproval apparent.

  Her father, however, seemed to be oblivious to what Molly’s revelation inferred.

  “So, are you the one who whipped Olivia into shape?” he asked Eve.

  Eve glanced at her before she responded, obviously unsure what she should say. But Olivia had no answers. Eve widened her eyes at her, as if trying to get her to say something, do something, anything, but Olivia didn’t. She couldn’t. She was frozen with no words and no plans of how to survive.

  “I—showed her a few things,” Eve finally said.

  Again, Jake coughed, and Olivia’s mind was right there with him.

  If they only knew what all she’s shown me.

  Eve’s flush deepened, as she also seemed to realize the way her words could be construed. She cleared her throat.

  “But Olivia did all the work.”

  “Well, she looks fantastic,” her father said. “Stronger than ever. And so do you. You’ve got some substantial muscle yourself.”

  Eve smiled but her nerves were still showing. “I like feeling strong.”

  Olivia’s mother, whose pinched face showed her displeasure with the conversation, turned to both Jake and Eve.

  “So, Jake, tell me, are you married?”

  It sounded like a polite inquiry and a harmless change in topic, but Olivia was aware that it was so much more than that.

  Oh, shit.

  This time it was Jake who cleared his throat. “No, ma’am. I’m not married. Haven’t found the right one, I guess.”

  “Surely, you have a girlfriend.”

  “Uh, no.” He laughed a little. “No girlfriend here.”

  “You’re not involved?”

  “No.”

  “What about you, Eve?” her mother asked, her focus now on what Olivia knew was her intended target.

  Eve drank more water. “Same here.”

  “You’re both single?” She was not happy with that information, and it was evident by her tone. “That’s hard for me to believe. You’re both so good-looking and polite. I don’t understand why you aren’t both married.”

  “Maybe we’re both terrified of commitment,” Jake said. “I know I am.”

  There was some light but forced laughter around the table. The tension still hung heavy in the air. Even Molly seemed to feel it.

  “Auntie Liv, open your presents.”

  “Shouldn’t we wait until after we eat, Mols?” Aaron asked.

  Molly slumped like the wind had vanished from her sails. “I guess.”

  “How about I open just one?” Olivia said, giving her an encouraging nudge.

  Molly perked up.

  “Okay! But I get to pick.”

  She rounded Aaron’s chair to sift through gifts that Olivia hadn’t seen on the bench next to Jake. She chose a small, rectangle shaped present and bounded back up to Olivia to hand it over.

  “This one’s from Eve.”

  Olivia was so overcome with anxiousness she felt like her head was going to explode and some sort of fucked up confetti would fly everywhere.

  “Maybe—” Eve started. “You should—”

  Olivia questioned her with her eyes.

  “I was just going to say—” She shook her head. “Never mind. Go ahead.”

  Olivia’s skin was now aflame, and Eve’s hesitation didn’t help.

  What had she gotten her?

  It couldn’t be anything that bad. The gift was too small for lingerie or anything else along those lines. And Eve would never give her something like that to open in front of anyone.

  “Open it, Auntie Liv,” Molly said. She clapped her hands in excitement.

  With everyone’s eyes on her and her heart in her throat, Olivia carefully removed the wrapping paper to find a dark blue velvet box. Time seemed to stand still, and she felt perpetually stuck in that moment, halfway between scared to death and irresistibly curious.

  Eve had gotten her something personal.

  Meaningful.

  Olivia knew it just as sure as she knew the stars would come out at night and the sun would rise in the morning.

  She slowly opened the box. A beautiful, elegant gold bracelet glistened in the overhead lights. Molly gasped and Olivia couldn’t breathe. She tried so very hard to hide her feelings and reaction.

  “Take it out,” Molly said.

  Olivia removed the bracelet from the clasps, noticing that it had a name plate, like an ID bracelet. She could see the etching on the plate, and her hand began to shake as she thought of what might be engraved on it. She was dying to know, but she wasn’t about to share it with the group. The gift was beautiful and special, which meant that whatever was written was something very dear and personal. She tried to return it to the box, but Molly, who seemed to be more excited than she was, wasn’t about to let her put it away.

  “Here, I’ll help you.” She took the bracelet and helped Olivia put it on.

  The bracelet glimmered and shined, and Jake and Aaron stated what a nice gift it was and how good it looked on Olivia. Her mother and father remained quiet, but her father, who sat with his chin resting on his hands, did look at her like he was pleased for her.

  She took a deep breath and smiled as platonically and politely as she could at Eve. She was expecting a similar smile in return, but something had seemed to overcome Eve as well, because she was now staring intently at her, silently reiterating all the things she’d ever said to her, in the moments of heated passion and in the intense moments they’d shared staring into each other’s eyes. Eve was giving all those words and emotion back to her, with the bracelet and with her heavy, heart drenched gaze.

  I am so in love with this woman.

  I’m about to dive into her and swim so far and so deep that the entire world and everything in it will just fall away.

  But I can’t.

  Not here.

  Not now.

  Someone tear me from this trance.

  Someone help me, please.

  Jake, the great savior that he was, stood and excused himself, claiming he needed the restroom. He touched Olivia on the shoulder as he walked past her and then widened his eyes at her when he was behind her parents, silently telling her to wake the fuck up and get a grip.

  “Wait, Auntie Liv, I think it says something,” Molly said, angling her head as she repositioned Olivia’s arm to look at the b
racelet.

  Olivia held her breath.

  Chapter Thirty-eight

  “Mols,” Aaron said. “Mols, you shouldn’t—”

  “It says,” Molly said, ignoring him, “For Olivia. Walk in courage. Live in love.”

  The table was once again silent and Olivia couldn’t bear to look at anyone other than Molly, who was just as happy as ever.

  “That’s really nice,” Molly said, sitting down in her chair. She wadded up the wrapping paper and handed it to Aaron, along with the box. “That’s a really pretty bracelet, Eve,” Molly continued. “Too bad you weren’t at my birthday party.”

  Eve, who was still staring at Olivia, tore her eyes away and looked at Molly. She laughed. Molly laughed along with her. “I’m not saying my presents were bad or anything, I’m just saying I wish you had been there to give me one from you. Because, I mean, wow. You’re coming for Christmas, right?”

  Olivia’s father laughed a bit as well, but Olivia sat wound tighter than a top, listening so hard for Eve’s reply she knew she could’ve heard a pin drop.

  Please say yes.

  For Molly.

  For me.

  Jake returned from the restroom and looked to Olivia.

  “What did I miss?”

  “Here we are, folks,” their waiter said, coming up from behind. He, along with another waiter, set out all their food, and though it looked absolutely delicious as it still sizzled in the pans, Olivia didn’t feel like eating.

  Everyone else apparently did, however, because they all began digging in, passing around the tortilla bowls and the refried beans and pico de gallo. Olivia made herself a shrimp fajita for show and took a few bites. Eve did the same, only without any meat. She was chatting politely with Olivia’s parents, mostly with her father, about golf of all things. She knew Eve played, but she didn’t know how much she really liked it, and Olivia wondered what else she didn’t know about her. And more importantly, if she’d ever get the chance to find out.