I place my cheek on his heart, listening to the gentle thud of his heartbeat. I look up at him to catch his smile. This is Nik, he’s my anchor, my life line. “Feeling better?”
I nod. I hadn’t realised what I was missing in the years after Ajaz. I had forgotten to live for myself. I smile for the first time in years. It’s a real, heartfelt smile. I think its intensity surprises Nik for he loses his smile and stares at me in wonder.
“What?” I ask, placing my arms around his neck.
“Do you realise how beautiful you are?” he whispers.
“Me? Beautiful? Now you’re pulling my leg.”
“No.” He looks so sincere that I can only wonder what it is that he’s seeing in me.
We stand close, looking at each other as if for the first time. Then the countdown begins.
10..9..8..7..6..5..4..3..2..1..HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Nik smiles at me and stoops down to capture my lips in a kiss that promises everything. I hesitate for a moment. Then I kiss him back, setting aside my fears, my misgivings, my loss. I need him more than he needs me. We cling on to each other while the world goes crazy around us. I wonder if New Year’s Eve has finally stopped mocking me.
I get my answer in the next instant when Nik releases me to go down on his knee.
I gasp as he removes a ring box from his blazer pocket and opens it to reveal a glittering, solitaire ring. My heart rushes through waves of emotions, each trying to get a greedy glimpse of this unreal moment. This can’t be happening! I’m not prepared for this!
“Prisha Risha Sanghvi,” Nik says amid whoops and cheers from people who have noticed what he’s up to, “Will you marry me?”
I can’t stop the tears that flow down my face. I can’t stop the guilt I feel of leaving Ajaz behind. I can’t punish myself anymore. I sink on the floor before him and fall into his open arms. He laughs stealing kisses from me. “I take it, it’s a yes?”
“Yes, yes!” I laugh with him knowing well it’s time to move on.
* * *
Was I happy? Yes. I was. I had learnt to compartmentalize my feelings and I had locked my love for Ajaz away forever. I won’t lie and say that I didn’t love him at all. Most people don’t forget their first love. But I was walking toward a new life. A life full of love, hopes and dreams. A life with my best friend, Nikhil Oberoi.
~ ~ ~
Memories – Prisha – 1997.
The heena design adorning my hands is intricate. It hides Nik’s name within as a challenge for him to hunt it out later.
We decided on a quick wedding, inviting only the closest of family members and friends and yet it’s a fairly lavish affair. Nik has to head back to the US and he insists on taking me with him. The visa procedure will take over a month and a half but he’s adamant I must go with him.
My wedding day rises with a glorious, spring sun. I’m surprised Sudha didn’t resist Nik’s proposal for although he’s a Hindu, he doesn’t belong to our caste. Something tells me, she’s happy to be rid of me.
I wear a baby pink, embellished lehenga with an elaborate bridal dupatta. I’ve filled in some curves since Nik’s arrival but I’m still painfully slim. The pink suits my glowing skin and shinning eyes. Nothing can hide the fact that I’m happy. I adore Nik, I guess I even love him in my own way. I’m glad it’s him I’m marrying and not some stranger.
The wedding is held on a lawn of a reputed hotel with tasteful decorations that include loads of my favourite flowers at Nik’s behest; baby pink roses. They add their lingering scent to this special day.
As a bride, I’m late and reach the venue after the ‘baraat’ or the groom’s procession has arrived. Sudha gives me a sound lecture in my ear but I’m not listening. I can see Nik waiting for me on the opposite side under the ‘mandap’ where the actual ceremony will take place. I can see or hear nothing else.
It’s early evening, right after dusk and under the bright lights, he’s looking like a prince in his white sherwani. My heart skips a beat as I take him all in.
I watch him as he watches me. He’s mouthing something for me. I read his lips and almost laugh. ‘You don’t hate me.’ No, I don’t. I adore him.
When I reach him, we’re handed rose garlands to put around each other’s necks, marking the commencement of our life’s journey together. His cousins and friends make the simple ceremony difficult by lifting him up so that I can’t reach him. I look around. I have no one to lift me. My family has never been vested in me. He knows this and stops his friends to stand before me, head bowed, his eyes full of promises. I will never let you be embarrassed.
My eyes acknowledge his silent promise. I know.
I place the garland around his neck and he does the same for me with a smile that is full of pride. He takes my hand to stand before the priest. His mother ties the edge of my dupatta to his stole. We sit in front of the havan that has a fire, its flames will be a witness to our holy union. The priest begins his recitations. He places rice in our hands and keeps muttering at us to throw it over our heads, refilling our palms as soon as one lot has gone.
We steal glances with each other as the priest drones on.
Nik says it all with his eyes, his heart, his soul and I reply with the same.
I will always take care of you.
I know.
I will always be there for you, in sickness and in health.
I know.
I will always love you, no matter what.
I know.
I will always strive to keep you happy.
I know.
I will always tease you.
I know.
The priest makes us throw the last of the rice then asks us to stand up for the ‘pheras’, our circle of heavenly promises. I take my place in front of Nik, we hold hands symbolising our commitment to each other.
I start walking around the fire, my heart beating a rapid tattoo. I send him my silent vows.
I promise to love and respect you.
I know.
I will always be there for you in sickness and in health.
I know.
I promise to look after us.
I know.
I promise to make this work.
I know.
I promise to learn how to cook.
He laughs.
I lead the first four pheras and Nik leads the last three. Seven pheras for seven births together.
When we sit back down, Nik’s mother gives him the ‘sindoor’ to adorn the parting in my hair. His thumb presses against my head with a few sprinkles of the red powder falling over my nose. He smiles, rubbing it away with his thumb. His gesture is intimate and thoughtful. Next he places the ‘mangalsutra’ around my neck, binding me completely to him as per Hindu tradition.
His smile is triumphant as we rise to take blessings from the elders. There are cheers all around and I’m finally Nik’s wife and he is my husband.
We stand side by side receiving blessings from the guests on the reception stage. Nik supports my back with his hand throughout. The flow of guests is almost non-stop but he whispers silly things in my ear whenever he gets the opportunity making me laugh.
“I want you to always smile, Rish,” he murmurs making me glance towards him. His eyes are drinking me in, taking pride at having me by his side. I give him a coy smile making him give me a false wounded look. “You’re going to kill me someday!”
I roll my eyes at his theatrics. “Yes, I just might if you don’t stop teasing me.”
He chuckles, taking my hand in his. “No you won’t. You adore me.”
I throw modesty to the winds, turn and kiss him smack on his cheek stunning him and all those who witnessed my move. He begins chuckling in earnest. I join him and we laugh like naughty children. We laugh because we both are happy.
The reception goes on almost till midnight. I’m exhausted by the time it’s over. When we reach Nik’s place, his hooting relatives surround us, teasing us to no end.
Sheesh! It’s like
everyone has a licence to tease on something as intimate as a physical union between two humans. My mouth grows dry. I haven’t given it much thought but I’m nervous. I wish everyone would leave us alone.
It’s after four in the morning that Nik finally manages to get me in his room and slam the door behind him. His mother shoos his cousins away.
I’m beyond exhausted and he knows that. He helps me rid my jewellery and the heavy dupatta. He gets rids his own sherwani top and sets his glasses on the side table. Then we both get in his bed and snuggle off into the deepest sleep possible.
I wake up to squint at the light filtering through the flowing curtains at the windows. I turn my head to find Nik sleeping next to me. Our legs are entangled in my skirts. I take time to look at him for the first time in his sleep. He’s attractive, good looking, his lips are soft with sleep, his eye lashes incredibly long and his chin and upper lip riddled with the shadow of a rising stubble. His eyes open slowly to my scrutiny making me blush. He smiles, pulling me in to lay a kiss on my forehead.
The bed dips as he rolls me down to pin me with his weight. “You, Risha, were snoring.”
I gape at him. “Was not!”
“Was too.”
“Not.”
“Was.”
“I hate you.”
He laughs. “No you don’t and that makes you a liar too.” He tries to get off the bed, gets caught in my skirts and we both go tumbling to the floor. “Crap!”
I laugh boisterously. I’ve married a clown. And he makes me happy.
Eleven
Hold on to dreams.
Our schedule is frenzied as we leave for the US the same week as our wedding. With all the relatives still around we hardly get time with each other. It doesn’t matter, we have the rest of our lives together.
I have left my job, not because it didn’t matter to me but because Nik matters more. I want some time off and relax before looking for options that suit me. He wants me to be happy.
The journey is long and exhausting but we finally arrive at his home in the US. The house a detached property complete with a swimming pool in the city of Calum Bay, in Orange County, Southern California. It has three bedrooms, a modern kitchen, patio, a yard and of course a swimming pool. Nik has a lot of family money and I know he’s doing well enough to afford this grandeur. It’s sunny and warm and full of promises and I love it!
Nik follows me as I walk through the house, explaining what goes where. I turn to him with a smile.
“You don’t have to try so hard.”
He raises his brow. “Try so hard?”
I tease him with a smile. “To impress me. I love it.”
He looks relieved but over the moon. “I want you to do whatever you want with it. It’s yours.”
I place a finger on his lips, stepping into his arms. “It’s ours, Nik. It’s ours.”
~ ~ ~
It takes us a week to settle in. A week filled with invitations to parties by his extended family. I warm up to them immediately. They’re taking time out of their busy schedules for us.
Tonight we attend the last party before Nik joins back work. He’s a software specialist and has been managing his work from home so far. We are both exhausted. We’ve hardly had any time together since we arrived here.
Sneaking off early is not an option, but Nik still manages to get us home by midnight. I immediately kick off my heels in the foyer. I’m not wearing anything but flats from now on.
Nik removes a slice of left over pizza from the refrigerator making me scold him. “Nik, we just ate!”
He looks puzzled. “No, you ate. I didn’t. I can’t stand party food anymore.”
I roll my eyes, trudging to the bedroom. I need to change out of this shimmery dress that’s been sticking to me like second skin all evening. I can’t get the zipper down. “Nik. Nik! Help me.”
He enters the room behind me, pizza slice in hand. “What?”
“Help me get the zipper down,” I ask, placing my hair across one side of my nape, leaving my back exposed. It’s a spaghetti strap dress with the straps already falling off my shoulders but the bodice is so tight I can’t get it off.
My eyes meet Nik’s in the mirror. He’s hungry but not for the pizza. We haven’t had the time to consummate our marriage yet. I’ve been adjusting to the weather, the time zone and the people. He’s been giving me the space I need balancing the friendship we have.
He sets the pizza slice aside to come stand behind me. His hands go to the zipper, his fingers tug at it before it slides down. We stare at each other through the mirror. My back is exposed to his eyes, to his mounting desire.
Without a word, he steps in and kisses the side of my exposed nape sending goose bumps all over my body. He leans down placing small kisses following the path of the zipper. I sag against him as I let go of the dress.
It pools near my feet, leaving me naked save for my under garments. Nik draws me to the bed. We need no words, we need each other. He leans over me, kissing me slowly and then with an urgency that has us both out of breath. My nerve endings respond to him, needing him closer, driving me higher.
He pins me with his naked weight, kissing me senseless. I pull him in to drink from him, his love, his desire. I need him to complete me.
“Wait!” he yells, dashing off to his wardrobe, searching for something. I gasp and then blush as I see what it is. He’s taking protection. We don’t need a baby too soon. We need time with each other.
He looms over me, placing kisses across my jaw line, driving me insane. “Risha?”
I look at him through my hazy eyes. “What?”
“I love you,” he whispers and in the next instant he completes our union, sending me climbing high on waves of pleasure to a place only he can bring me back from.
Tears form in my eyes. My love for Nik is as pure and complete as my desire for him. That night I love him with all that I have. When he takes me over the edge, I know we’re going to make it after all. He catches my lips in the aftermath, making silent promises.
When he rolls over on his back, he pulls me with him. I slide onto his chest, snagging the amethyst in my hair. I stiffen as I feel its pull. It’s a witness to our union.
~ ~ ~
The cold, icy drops that fall over my cheeks, alert me of her presence. I open my eyes to find her floating over me, her purple eyes full of fury. She uses her talons to pierce my cheek drawing frigid drops of blood. Terror courses through me as she places her icy palms over my cheeks.
“He’s not the one for you, pet,” she informs me in her raspy voice. She turns my head to stare at Nik who’s sleeping peacefully by my side. “We have chosen one for you. He’s not the one!”
“I don’t know what you mean,” I whimper, tears forming in my eyes.
She uses her talons to lift the amethyst at my neck. “He’s the one. He’s the only one. He’s the chosen one.”
She moves to hover above Nik. The smile she throws me is evil and full of horrifying promises. “This one, we will take. The price is now due.”
“What price? What price?” I try to scream but I’m gasping for breath. I’m being choked, I can’t breathe, I can’t breathe!
“Risha!” It’s Nik’s alarmed cry that has me falling back to reality. I sit up gasping, my hands at my throat.
He stares at me in shock, brushing aside the sweaty locks at my forehead. “Sweetheart, are you all right?”
I stare at his concerned face and know my terror of losing him is real. She’s evoked memories in me, memories that I can’t deny. I throw myself in his arms, crying because I have no idea how to save him.
~ ~ ~
I try my best to explain everything I know about the ghost that haunts me. I call it ghost because I don’t know what else it can be. Nik stares at me in disbelief. He knows I’m upset but my ravings are too theatrical. I know he’s probably going to drag me to a shrink in the morning. How do I convince him I’m not hallucinating, that she’s real and that sh
e’s warned me?
I don’t want to lose Nik. I can’t lose him. He’s my world. What do I do to keep him safe?
The days that go by are the worst I’ve lived so far. I’m unable to let Nik out of my sight. I forbid him from going to work, I fall asleep in his arms, I, all but, keep him tied to me. By the end of the week, my mental health worries Nik. He had no idea he got married to a nut job.
He cajoles me into visiting a shrink. I go because I’m willing to try anything to keep him safe. Even if it means proving I’m actually insane and delusional. The session doesn’t help. I’m so restless that the doc has to call Nik in when he’s supposed to be waiting outside.
True Rising: Mark of the Defenders Page 10
