While we eat, Noah says, “We need to finish the business plan so I can hand it in tomorrow. You’ll be caught up with all the work then.”
“Thanks for all the help.”
I hear the front door open, and my head immediately snaps in the direction of the sound.
“Hey guys, how was your Christmas break?” Hana asks when she spots us. It sends my heart rate shooting through the ceiling. “Oh, and happy New Year.”
When Fallon enters the suite, my heart rate shoots sky-high.
Hana gives each of us a hug, but my eyes are locked on Fallon as she moves closer to Noah. “Good to see you again,” she says to him.
I get up and move closer to her. Not knowing what to say, I wrap my right arm around her. She gives me a quick pat on the back then tries to pull away, but I tighten my hold on her while bringing my left arm around her as well. Still at a loss for words, I murmur, “I’m glad you’re back.”
Holding Fallon, I finally feel like I’m home and not just stumbling through life. I take in a deep breath of her scent, and it feels like I can breathe again. It has me admitting, “I missed you.”
Fallon doesn’t hug me as tightly, and when she pulls away a second time, I let her go.
“How’s your sight?” she asks, and I don’t miss the tension in her voice and how she turns her face away from me.
“Better. Every day I notice a change.”
“That’s good to hear.” She moves away from me. “I need to unpack. Catch you later.”
When the girls have gone to their rooms, Noah mutters, “That wasn’t half as bad as I thought it would be.”
“Yeah,” I agree. “The awkwardness is still there, but at least she didn’t slap the shit out of me.”
Noah whacks me lightly upside the head. “That’s on behalf of Fallon, who’s too much of a lady to hit you.” We finish our meals, then Noah says, “Time for eyedrops, then we need to hit the business plan hard.”
I get up from the stool and ask, “Where do you want to do this?”
“Sit on the couch. I’ll get everything. I’m tired of being holed up in your room.”
I walk over to the living room and sit down. Noah comes back with everything we’ll need, then says, “I’ve dimmed the lights. You can take off the sunglasses.”
Removing them, I set the glasses down on the couch and grin at Noah when I can make eye contact with him.
I hear footsteps coming down the hallway, and glancing in that direction, I see Fallon and Hana come into the open space.
“Hold up,” I whisper to Noah, and getting up, I walk toward the girls.
Fallon freezes, and when I get near her, she begins to turn around, but I quickly take hold of her arm, and it makes a surprised gasp burst from her.
I move in front of her and notice her hair is hanging over the right side of her face. I’ve been worried about her injuries and the surgery she has to go for. When I lift a hand to her face, she tries to pull back, but I tighten my grip on her arm.
“Let me see.”
She shakes her head. “I don’t want any of you to see.” Her voice trembles, and it makes worry explode inside my chest, and a bad feeling ripples over me.
I try to move her hair away, but Fallon rears back and turns her face to the side. “I said no, Kao.”
Determined to see how severe her injuries are, I take hold of her face, and then my fingers brush over swollen ridges.
She yanks away again, and it has me snapping, “Hold still, Fallon.”
“No!” She manages to pull free and darts back down the hallway. I go after her and grab her arm again before she can reach her room. As she swings toward me, her hair moves, and I can make out dark scarring on the whole right side of her face and neck. I can’t see the finer details or coloring, but the fact that I can see the cuts means they’re fucking bad.
Horror crashes over me as I realize Fallon got hurt a hell of a lot worse than she let on.
Chapter 13
FALLON
I thought things were bad, but they’re nothing compared to the anguish drowning me as Kao’s eyes focus on my face.
Maybe he can’t see well enough to make out the scars.
My hope is fleeting, and it dies a sudden and awful death as shock tightens his features.
“Christ, Fallon,” he gasps. “You said it was nothing to worry about.”
A searing pain rips what’s left of my world apart.
“Why didn’t you tell me the cuts were so bad?” he lashes out at me, his shocked expression quickly turning to horror.
This is the moment I feared most, and it’s turning out to be a nightmare. Out of everyone here, why did Kao have to see the scars?
I close my eyes so I won’t see his horrorstruck face anymore. Shame begins to burn in my chest, scorching the last of my femininity away.
Self-preservation takes over, and I rip my arm out of Kao’s hold. Trying to save whatever’s left of my self-esteem, I bite the words out, “Why would I? You decided I wasn’t good enough for you any longer the second you found out I got hurt. I didn’t think it would change anything between us.”
I know my words are cruel, but I can’t stop them from falling over my lips.
It’s also the truth.
Turning away from Kao, I walk into my room while trying to cover the scars again before anyone else can see them.
“Is that what you think?” Kao asks behind me.
“That’s what I know!” I walk to my dressing table. Picking up my brush, I begin to fix my hair.
God, Kao’s hand brushed over the scars.
The thought alone is enough to make my stomach roll with nausea.
“Fallon,” Kao begins to talk, his voice softer.
Mortified and crushed, I swing back to him and scream, “Get out of my room! I’m done talking about it.” My breaths explode over my lips, and I’m a second away from losing my composure. When Kao doesn’t move, I dart forward and shove at his chest. “Get out! Get out! Get out!”
Jase and Hana come into the room, and luckily Hana pulls Kao away.
Jase quickly shuts the door then rushes over to me. “What happened?” He begins to lift his hands, but when I shake my head, still trying to breathe through the gut-wrenching heartbreak, Jase stills, and his eyes lock on my face.
God. I can’t.
Shock ripples over Jase’s features, and the blow slams my feet from under me. I crumble to the floor as a cry tears out of me.
Hunter bursts into the room just as Jase kneels down in front of me. I try to gasp for air, but another cry completely robs me of my breath.
I can’t.
I wish I could just disappear. I wish I never existed.
Jase frames my face with both his hands, and he leans in close. “Shh… it’s okay. Breathe, Fallon.”
I try to shake my head as I gasp for air but my neck cramps up, and it feels like my lungs have collapsed along with the last of my will to live.
Hunter’s arm comes around my shoulders. “Come on, Fallon. Just breathe.”
I shake my head again, unable to think straight.
Hana comes running into the room and pushes her way through Jase and Hunter. The moment my feverish eyes land on her, my body shoots forward and into the safety of her arms. My arms wrap tightly around her, and I bury my face against her neck as I cry for everything I’ve lost.
Oh, God, why did I survive? I would’ve been better off dead.
“Guys, you can leave,” Hana snaps. “I’ve got this.”
“But…” Jase begins to argue.
“Leave so I can calm her down!” Hana yells.
Oh, God, make it stop.
I manage to draw in a strangled breath before another cry tears out of my burning chest.
Hana holds me, and she begins to murmur, “Everyone’s gone. It’s just us. I’ve got you.” She presses a kiss to my scarred cheek, and sobs wrack my body. “Shh… I’ve got you.” I hear her voice tremble and know she’s close to tears a
s well.
I swallow a couple of times and focus on getting air into my lungs, and then another wave of unrelenting devastation hits. “Kao… touched the… scars,” I stutter through my tears.
Hana pushes me a little back and says, “Don’t worry about it right now. Just breathe with me.” I begin to shake my head, but Hana quickly frames my face, and her gaze locks with mine. “Look at me, Fallon.” The expression on her face is filled with all the love she feels for me, and it lends my broken heart and defeated spirit strength. “I love you. You’re my best friend, my sister. I love you so much.”
Her words help calm me down until I’m able to breathe normally again.
A caring smile softens her features. “I love you more than anything in this world. You’re the most important person in my life.”
Moving forward, I wrap my arms around her again and hold onto her for dear life. “I love you too.”
After a couple of seconds, Hana pulls back again. “The scars don’t change who you are. You’re strong, and you have an unbreakable spirit. Okay? You just lost control for a little while, but you’ll get back up again. And you’ll be so much stronger.”
I nod because what Hana says is the truth. I can’t stay down forever. My social standing doesn’t allow for people like me to give up.
“You’re allowed to hurt,” Hana keeps going. “You’re allowed to break, and I promise I’ll be there to pick up every piece and to help put you back together. But after you’ve reached rock bottom, there’s only one way, and that’s up.” Hana climbs to her feet, and then she pulls me up. Her expression is fierce and loyal as she stares at me. “And by God, we’ll keep getting up no matter what comes our way. Okay?”
I nod again. “Yes.”
“I want to hear you say it,” she demands.
“We’ll keep getting up no matter what comes our way,” I repeat her words.
Her face softens, and she uses her thumbs to wipe the tears from my cheeks. “Do you feel better?”
I’ve hardly managed to calm down, and then the wave of devastation washes over me again. “Kao saw the scars.” I swallow hard. “Jase and Hunter as well.”
“Do you trust me?” she asks.
I nod. There’s no one I trust more than Hana.
I watch as she goes to open the door, and then Jase bursts into the room. He walks right up to me and locks me against his chest. When he presses a kiss to my cheek and then my temple, my body jerks in his hold. Pulling back, he frames my face, and his eyes burn in mine. “I don’t care what you look like, Fallon.”
My chin begins to tremble, but I swallow hard on the tears.
“I wish you didn’t hide that you weren’t coping from me,” Jase continues.
Hunter brushes a hand up and down my back. “We’re a family. Why didn’t you tell us?”
Because you were all busy being there for Kao.
Hana steps closer, and there’s a bite to her tone as she says, “You were all a little busy.”
I see the guilt ripple over Jase and Hunter’s faces, and it only makes me feel like shit.
“I still need to unpack and shower,” I murmur, too tired to hash things out with them.
“Have you had dinner?” Hunter asks. “I can order something for you.”
I don’t have any appetite. “I’m good.”
“Can I make you some coffee?” Jase asks, and it makes the corner of my mouth lift. He doesn’t make coffee for anyone.
“Yeah, I’d like to taste your coffee,” I tease.
A grin forms on my cousin’s face. “I keep my special talents hidden, or everyone would have me making coffee all the time.”
I let out a chuckle. “Yeah, keep lying to yourself.”
The banter helps ease the tension, and once Jase and Hunter have left, I turn to my luggage.
“Go shower,” Hana orders. “I’ll unpack for you.”
“My mother hen,” I say, giving her another hug. “I wouldn’t be able to survive without you.”
KAO
I’m so fucking shocked, I don’t even take in that Noah’s put in my eyedrops and placed my sunglasses back on my face.
My body trembles from the heartache and regret building in me. I should’ve been there for Fallon. If I hadn’t pushed her away because of my own insecurities and worry, I would’ve known how much she was struggling.
God, I failed her in the worst way possible.
How will I ever make this up to her? Can I even?
Hearing her cry and knowing I’m the last person she wants near her ripped my heart out of my chest.
The woman I love with everything I am broke down in front of me, and there was nothing I could do. It tightens my chest until it feels like my heart is being squashed into a painful lump.
I take deep breaths, trying to calm down because I need to be strong for Fallon now.
I realize, even though I tried to push Fallon away to protect her from my blindness, my heart never let go of her. She has always been and always will be my life.
I treated Fallon like shit.
God, I wish I could punch myself.
The thoughts make every muscle in my body tense.
Jase comes to sit on the other couch, and Hunter drops down next to him.
“Fuck,” Jase mutters, sounding pissed off. “How did we not know?”
“We were all focused on Kao,” Noah mutters.
I shut my eyes against the truth. I lost my shit, and our friends scurried to help me. I left Fallon vulnerable.
Fuck, I’m such a weak sack of shit.
“We need to get her through this,” Hunter states the obvious.
“Yeah, definitely,” Jase says. “Then again, I think Kao’s the only one who can help her.” My head snaps up, and I look at Jase. “You broke her, so you need to fucking fix her.” I can hear the bitter bite in his voice.
I can’t argue with the truth.
Nodding, I say, “I wish I knew what to do.”
“You fucking man up. When she pushes you away, you fight harder to stay by her side. When she lashes out at you, you fucking take it,” Jase says.
Like he did with Mila.
“And I don’t want to hear shit about you just being friends with her. We all fucking know you love her,” Jase adds.
I begin to get up, but then he snaps, “Not tonight. Give her time to calm down first.”
“Also,” Hunter adds, “I think Hana will kick your ass if you go near Fallon now.”
Jase lets out a tired chuckle. “Who knew Hana could get so angry?”
“Right?” Hunter lets out a sigh. “Fuck, I feel like shit. Fallon has always been there for all of us.”
“Yeah, we fucked up badly,” Jase mutters.
Me, most of all.
Tonight was one hell of an eye-opener. Fuck waiting for my vision to return completely. Fuck everything but Fallon.
She’s all that matters now, and I can only pray I’m not too late.
I’m up at the crack of dawn, and after getting dressed, I slowly make my way down the hallway. When I walk into the kitchen and I see Fallon preparing a cup of coffee, I pause.
All I want to do is wrap her up in my arms and kiss everything better, but I know it won’t be that easy.
First things first.
I move closer, and Fallon turns toward me. The second she sees me, she drops the full cup of coffee in the sink and darts around the other side of the table. I move as quickly as I can to my left and block her way to the hallway.
I can feel the tension coming off her, and not wanting a repeat of last night, I say, “Remember what I said about us being just friends?”
“Yeah, it’s kind of hard to forget,” she bites the words out.
“I lied.” I wish I could make the past four weeks disappear.
Fallon shakes her head. “I don’t need your pity.” She darts past me, and I almost go after her, but when I see Hana waiting at the end of the hall for Fallon, I rethink myself.
Fuck, this
is going to be so much harder than I thought it would be.
Fallon believed the lie I spewed, but she won’t spare a minute for the truth, and it’s so unlike her. Just another sign telling me how much she’s hurting.
I make three cups of coffee, and praying I don’t spill half of it, I carry two cups to Fallon’s room. “Hana,” I call by the closed door.
When she opens, I hold the two cups out to her. “I know it’s a shitty peace offering, but…”
“It’s a start,” Hana sasses me. “Keep making us coffee until you graduate, and we can talk again.”
I let out a chuckle. “Deal.” When she takes the coffee from me, I add, “Tell her I meant what I said.”
“Just give her time,” Hana whispers.
I nod and take a step backward. “She can have all the time she needs, but I’m done running away.”
“That’s good to hear. I really didn’t want to beat you up,” Hana admits, and it draws another chuckle from me.
“I’m glad she has you,” I say before I walk back to the kitchen to have my own coffee.
Chapter 14
FALLON
I tried to cover the scarring as much as I could, but the more foundation I put on, the worse it looked. Feeling hopeless, I wrap a scarf around my neck to keep my hair in place because I’ll die if I have to suffer through a repeat of last night. I hardly slept, too worried about starting classes today.
My thoughts are also filled with what Kao said earlier in the kitchen.
He lied?
Ha.
I still remember clearly how he shot me down and said we’re nothing more than friends. I’m filled with guilt for the part I played in our accident, and nothing he says will make me forget that he also blames me. Rightly so, as well.
I let out an exhausted sigh. It’s only eight in the morning, and I’m already tired and emotionally drained.
‘I lied.’
Kao’s words echo through me again, but then I see the look on his face when he saw the scars. The shock and horror.
Defiant Heir Page 10
