Heart of Decadence (Handful of Hearts Book 5)

by Jenna Jaxon

  Now the toad-like little man seemed to be making good on his threat to keep Miss Burrowes’s reputation stained and her unmarriageable. Of course, he’d not tangled with Viscount Ainsley yet; however, that was about to change. As his curricle drew closer, he recognized Lady Chalgrove, alone in Lady Hamilton’s conveyance. Not the most pleasant of women, the lady had not been on the list of close acquaintances to whom he wished to introduce Miss Burrowes. But likely a good ally for Burke’s gossip mongering. Once more into the breach.

  “Good afternoon, Lady Chalgrove. How do you do? I see you are taking advantage of the abundant sunshine.” He offered her his most charming smile, although his cheeks seemed ready to cave in. Turning what he hoped was his sourest gaze on Burke, he gave the man a curt nod. “Burke.”

  “Ainsley.” The man had the audacity to stare at Miss Burrowes with a hunger Nathan did not like at all.

  “Many are doing so this afternoon, my lord.” Lady Chalgrove gave him a nod and a stiff smile. “Those who are accustomed to being here must be enjoying the pleasant day. Although others will try to insert themselves into a Society not meant for them.” She glared at his companion, making it extremely difficult for Nathan not to plant the woman a facer. Not that he’d ever strike a woman, but this one seemed to deserve it most heartily.

  “Well, Society has never been very discerning regarding its members.” Nathan raised his quizzing glass to Mr. Burke, peering at him as though he were some new species of insect. “Else many would have been dropped from its ranks long ago.”

  “Indeed, my lord. I believe you have one such in your curricle this moment,” Burke piped up, his florid face turning beet red.

  “An unfortunate misunderstanding occurred many years ago, as you have been given to understand, Burke. When the truth about that time comes out,” he glared into the carriage to emphasize the point to the lady, “Miss Burrowes will be completely vindicated.”

  “Well, I see the lady has a determined champion in you, Lord Ainsley. She will need such to defend her immoral ways.” Lady Chalgrove pursed her lips and settled back into the seat primly.

  “As I said, a misunderstanding on the part of the ton long ago that we intend to remedy.” He dared not look at Miss Burrowes. A single indication of distress might cause him to act more rashly than would be wise.

  “But what of her more current behavior, my lord?” Burke gave him a knowing smirk.

  “Miss Burrowes’s behavior this Season has been exemplary, sir, as I have reason to know.” Warning bells jangled in Nathan’s mind as he attempted to hang onto his civility with both hands.

  “Surely the tryst you witnessed in Lady Hamilton’s library could not be deemed moral behavior by a pure young woman?” The man’s evil smile widened. “I was just remarking to Lady Chalgrove that I had no idea how depraved Miss Burrowes actually was until the moment she threw herself at me, thinking we were alone.”

  Miss Burrowes gasped behind him, the soft, pain-filled sound snapping his last vestige of self-control. He thrust the ribbons into her hands. “Hold these.”

  The startled swoop of her upraised brows was almost comical. “But—”

  “You’ll be fine. Trust me.” He jumped down from the curricle and walked to the nose of Burke’s horse. “I will ask you to dismount, sir.”

  “Dismount?” The confidence on Burke’s face slipped a notch. “Why would I dismount?”

  “Because I would challenge you face to face, sir. It is the correct procedure when initiating a duel.” He stared unblinking into Burke’s eyes as the blood drained from the man’s face. Ignoring gasps from the ladies in both carriages, Nathan stood as still and immoveable as a rock. “Now get down.”

  Burke pulled back on the reins and the horse jibbed. “Move away, my lord. You’ve spooked him.”

  “Apparently, you can control your horse as little as you can your tongue. Will you accept my challenge, Mr. Burke? Or will you retract your statement about Miss Burrowes? You must choose one or the other, else I will brand you a liar and a coward to all the ton.” Nathan grabbed the bridle and the horse calmed. “You have besmirched a lady’s name and I will have satisfaction of you one way or the other.”

  Mouth working, but no sound emerging, Mr. Burke cut a sharp glance toward Lady Chalgrove, whose eyes seemed ready to pop out of her head. “I…I believe I may have misspoken about the lady, my lord. She… I…I was the one who initiated the embrace you walked in on.” His voice turned from apologetic to peevish. “Because I believed us about to become betrothed.”

  “And now that you are no longer her suitor, you believe you are entitled to spread false rumors about her, perhaps to discourage my suit? Have a care, Mr. Burke.” If Nathan could’ve reached the man to throttle him, he would have done it without any more compunction than squashing a gnat. “I do not discourage so easily and the next time I hear you spreading lies and filth about Miss Burrowes, I will seek you out and we will meet over pistols at dawn. And make no mistake.” His eyes bored into Burke’s. “I am an excellent shot and I will aim to kill.”

  Burke’s face went from red to deathly white and he gasped in breaths as though he’d just made a run for his life.

  Nathan turned on his heel and climbed back into the curricle. Miss Burrowes’s visage had also paled considerably. Well, it was best she learn the resolve of the man she was going to marry. True, she’d not consented to the match. Yet.

  But by the end of the night, he’d make sure there was absolutely no doubt in anyone’s mind they would marry. Especially in the mind of Miss Amelia Burrowes.

  Chapter 7

  “And that is the game, I believe, ladies and gentleman.”

  Amelia could not help smiling as Lord Ainsley laid down his last card, the jack of hearts, thus taking the final trick and winning ten of the thirteen tricks in the hand for them. Their partnership had been most agreeable and profitable as the wagering on each trick had been fierce, especially between Lord Ainsley and his sister. With this last trick, she and his lordship had gained at least two pounds. Nothing to put any one of them in the workhouse, but still an exciting and pleasurable way to pass the evening.

  And the evening had been most pleasant. After the scene in Hyde Park this afternoon, she’d had grave doubts about attending Mrs. Doyle’s party. All she’d wanted to do was hide herself at home and dread the gossip sure to begin again. She’d thought herself so inured to the mean and disrespectful things people said about her that she no longer felt the sting of their unkind words. But this afternoon she’d discovered that it was not true. Both Lady Chalgrove’s and Mr. Burke’s cutting remarks had hurt abominably, but because Lord Ainsley had been there to hear them, rather than from their estimation of her. That she valued his lordship’s opinion of her so much had also greatly alarmed her. He’d hurt her deeply once before. Dare she allow herself to embrace those feelings from so long ago?

  For that reason, along with others, she’d been in two minds about attending tonight. Her mother, however, had insisted, and Amelia was now glad she’d come. As soon as they arrived, she’d been met by Miss Locke and led to a table where Lady Letitia and a Lady Celinda Graham, whom she’d not met before, had been seated. After that introduction, the four of them had played a spirited game of Vingt-Et-Un with much betting and laughter. Afterward, Lord Ainsley had come to escort her to his table and the game of whist they’d just finished.

  No one had been unkind. Mrs. Doyle and her charge, a Miss Amanda Sharpe, had welcomed her and her parents along with Lord Ainsley. She’d heard no whisperings around the room, no one nodding at her or suspicious looks. Either no one knew who she was, which she doubted, or Lord Ainsley’s presence and obvious protection had quashed the gossips for the evening. If only this friendly atmosphere could become her life’s norm, she’d have nothing left to wish for. Except, perhaps, one thing.

  From lowered eyelids, she surreptitiously watched Lord Ainsley gather the cards, chatting with his friend and sister, his quick laughter ringing out
often. He’d said he wanted to marry her, yet she could scarce believe the words. Her heartbeat quickened each time she thought of them. Were they true? Did he actually wish to marry her? All his actions seemed to indicate that he did. After so many years of longing for a normal life, and enduring all the hurt, would she indeed reach her happy ending?

  “Miss Burrowes, would you like a breath of fresh air?” With a bright smile, Lord Ainsley focused his attention directly on her. “I believe we’ve generated too much heat with our brilliant play. We must allow Haversham and my sister to recover their senses before they attempt a rematch.”

  Fresh air meant a stroll on the veranda, out in the darkness where they might do more than simply cool their cheeks. The thought sent a thrill all through her. “I’d love some fresh air, my lord.”

  After placing the cards back in their cunning little box, Lord Ainsley offered her his arm and they sauntered through Mrs. Doyle’s packed rooms to the back of the house and out onto the veranda, dimly lit by the quarter moon.

  The tiny terrace faced a very narrow garden, awash with sweet-smelling, night-blooming jasmine, and bound on both sides by tall fences. A small flight of stairs led to a pathway that headed out into the yard. Lord Ainsley steered them down the stairs and into the garden, stopping once they were secluded underneath the garden’s centerpiece, a large weeping willow.

  The huge tree, whose branches fell in thin, gently swaying arcs, created a curtain around them, effectively shielding them from anyone looking into the garden. He loosed her arm, but kept her hand, turning so he faced her. “I apologize that there is no cherry tree. This is the best I could manage.”

  A frenzied trembling overtook Amelia, from her fingers captured in his strong grasp to her stomach, where a thousand butterflies beat their frantic wings. The darkness revealed little about his face, save the intensity of his stare, trained on her mouth. Was he truly going to—

  He pulled her to him, until she pressed against the rock-hard body she’d remembered in her dreams. Cradling her head in his hands, he lifted it and guided her lips to his. The touch of their velvety softness broke loose something deep inside Amelia. Something she’d thought had died long ago on a pillow sodden with tears. Now it raised its head and flooded her heart with the love and passion born that night in May so many years ago, fiercer now for having lain dormant.

  She seized his head in both hands, pulling him to her, refusing to let go.

  He sought entry with a subtle testing of the seam of her lips and she opened immediately, reveling in the joy of having him in her once more. Their tongues tangled then she slid past his and into his mouth, greedy for him, and wanting more, just as she had before. She’d never believed she’d feel this for him again, not after the disappointment and shame he’d put her through. But what person could refuse a glass of water if they were dying of thirst? Much as she would’ve liked to deny it, no man had ever made her feel such passion, or desire, or love. Not Jonathan, and certainly not Mr. Burke. If Ainsley did not marry her this time, she would as soon die as live.

  Slowly and carefully, he withdrew from her. Unwilling to give him up after such a short time, she nevertheless fought the urge to cling to him. If he was a man of his word, they would have the rest of their lives to dally thus. At last, she raised her gaze to him, fear and longing warring in her heart.

  He cleared his throat and took both her hands. “Miss Burrowes, I know we have not been reacquainted long, and I fear I may be someone to whom you will not wish to give your trust so soon, however, I have at last fulfilled my promise and asked your father leave to court you.” Gazing down at their joined hands, he traced the backs of her knuckles with his thumbs. “I regret I was not allowed to make this declaration ten years ago, but I will make it now with the same ardent desire that you will consent to become my wife.”

  Although her trembling had stopped, her bones seemed suddenly unwilling to support her. He had proposed. He still wanted to marry her, even after all this time and in spite of all the vicious lies spread about her. She swayed a little toward him and he clutched her arms.

  “Here, sit on this bench. No one will see.”

  The little wrought iron bench sat on the grass outside the circle of willow branches. Still, the magic continued, for he was there, holding her hands, looking down at her with a tenderness that brought tears to her eyes.

  “Please do not cry, my dear.” He passed her a linen handkerchief that smelled of sandalwood and his own subtle scent.

  When she’d wiped her eyes, he knelt and grasped her hands again. “Miss Burrowes, will you do me the great honor of becoming my wife?”

  Gathering her courage, Amelia squeezed his hands. “I am truly honored that you have asked me this, my lord, but I there is a question I must ask first.”

  “Ask me what you will, my dear.” His smile encouraged her. “I will have no secrets from you.”

  Heart in her throat, she forced herself to ask, “Are you asking me to marry you from a duty you believe you owe me, or do you truly wish to wed me, ruined reputation and all?”

  He paused then cocked his head, a strange gleam in his eyes. “Will you refuse me if I say I asked you from duty alone?”

  Now it was her turn to hesitate. She’d been almost certain of his regard for her, especially after the persuasion of his kiss. A wave of despair washed over her and she worried her bottom lip. How foolish to hope he still cared for her that way. Could she marry him knowing he did not return her affection?

  “No, my lord, I will not refuse you. You know I must marry and why, and that my feelings have never been considered in the matter. And although I might wish for a different answer from you, mine will remain the same.” She swallowed hard. “For if you wish to marry me for duty’s sake, then I cannot fault your honor and would not refuse an honorable man.” Perhaps, in time, duty might grow into the affection of old.

  “But you did not wait for my answer to your question, Miss Burrowes, before giving your consent.”

  Frowning, she peered at him. “You gave me your answer.”

  “I asked a question. I did not say it was my answer.” He kissed her hands, sending tingled up and down her arms. Between that sensual riot on her skin and his enigmatic words, her head was spinning.

  “So what…is your answer?”

  He turned her hand over and kissed her palm.

  Her whole body went up in flames, heat licking through her veins until she was panting with desire.

  “I have wanted you, Miss Burrowes, and you alone for ten long years.” He kissed the other palm, his tongue searing her flesh, and she whimpered, unable to help herself. “I will confess that after I assumed you had married, I allowed you to slip from my mind.” His kisses now strayed up to the sensitive skin over her wrist. “But I never moved on. Never looked for another woman to marry, even when I knew it was time that I should do so.”

  Those sensual lips found their way to the crook of her elbow and lingered there, sending Amelia’s senses into a frenzy. If he didn’t stop, they might end up making all the gossip true. Still, she didn’t want him to stop.

  “Then when I saw you at Lady Hamilton’s, I knew, deep down. I wanted you and only you for my wife.” He rose, bringing her to her feet as well. “Now I have a question, no two, for you, Miss Burrowes.” Capturing her head once more, he kissed her temple at her hairline, sending shivers down her spine. “When you said yes, was it really because of the safety my title and position will bring you, or do you wish to wed me for me?”

  There was only one way to answer that question. She grasped his neck and pulled his head down to hers, seeking his mouth with an abandon that surprised even her. Moaning until her lips found his, she pressed them together, desperate to show him how much she wanted him, had always wanted him.

  Eagerly, he enfolded her in his arms, drawing her so close she seemed to touch every inch of him. An insistent bulge below his waist strained against her stomach, and desire flared to life within her. Oh, if only t
hey were married now. Why must they wait even longer than they already had? There was the risk, of course. She of all people understood that. But if she would chance further ruin for any man, it would be for him. “My lord?”

  “Yes, Miss Burrowes?” Gravelly and low, his voice rumbled in her ear, his hot breath sending chills through her.

  “I don’t know how to…” Completely at a loss for what to expect, Amelia whispered, “What do we do now?”

  A shudder rippled down his body, as though he’d been doused with cold water, and he stepped away from her, holding her at arm’s length.

  Not at all what she’d expected, or indeed wanted.

  Gasping, Lord Ainsley held up his hand. After a moment, he sighed and his breathing returned to normal. “To answer your question, Miss Burrowes, now we return to Mrs. Doyle’s party and continue to play as though nothing has happened, however difficult that may be. On the way home, however, we will inform your parents we have come to an accord and tomorrow we will announce our betrothal.”

  “Oh.” She’d not expected quite so prosaic a response.

  Even in the darkness, she could see his smile. “Did you think I would have a different plan of action?”

  Heat stung her cheeks. “After that…interlude, I thought you might wish to…”

  “Out here in the garden, Miss Burrowes?” The amusement in his voice was almost palpable. “Neither the time nor the place for an amorous tryst, believe me. You are, however, correct regarding my personal wishes.”

  “Oh.” Her cheeks must be the color of cherries.

  He took her arm and twined it through his. “Let us walk a bit and hope the cool air aids us in our deception. It is not a very long path, but we will keep a very slow pace.” He steered them toward the back of the garden. “May I suggest we wed the day after the last of the banns are read? I know we could procure a special license, but in our case, I think we should continue to woo the ton with very circumspect behavior. They have extraordinarily suspicious minds and if we are married by special license, every lady in town would begin to count to see when our first child should be born.”