Blended with Pain: Notorious Devils (Cash Bar Book 4)

by Hayley Faiman

  I don’t ask him what the deal with her is, honest to fuck, I don’t really care. He wants to fuck crazy, he can fuck crazy. I personally like my sweet good girl, and right now I want my son back, those are the only two things on my mind.

  “He’ll call,” Snake announces. As if he’s summoning the Devil himself, my phone chooses that exact moment to ring.

  I notice the Montana area code, pressing my thumb against the accept on the screen, I growl into the phone. “Where’s my son?”

  Snake sits straight in his seat and the rest of the room grows fucking electric. Every man’s eyes are on me and I wait for the fuck to speak.

  “Cute kid. Blond. Just like you, just like his pretty mama,” he points out, his voice smooth and calm.

  I hold back telling him that he doesn’t want my son. Sadie wasn’t blonde, her daddy was Hispanic. I only know that because she told me once when she was high. Her and Carson have different fathers. Sadie remembered hers from the brief encounters of her childhood before Carson was born.

  “What’s the game, Skull?”

  He hums, sounding far too goddamn smug for his own good. Flipping my laptop open, I lock into my highly illegal program and type in his phone number, waiting for it to ping with his coordinates. I’ll find his ass. “I’m not sure what I want. Your club, your woman, or both.”

  “Not the president, not my club,” I say, my fingers moving swiftly and quietly over the keys of the computer.

  He chuckles. “Don’t care, he’s there with you. I’m not stupid. Snake,” he calls out.

  “Can’t have my club, fucker,” Snake growls.

  “You just couldn’t leave us alone, you had to go poking your nose where it didn’t belong,” Skull growls. “We had it good, you fucked everything, Keys. Fucked it all, and now it’s my turn to fuck you.”

  The searching on the screen stops and a little red blip pinpoints where they are. Got them. I know where they are, and it isn’t far. In fact, I narrow my gaze. They’re in my goddamn house. Lifting my hand, I stop the brothers from saying anything.

  “Fuck me and you’ll feel it until you stop breathing. It won’t be pretty, it’s going to burn, Skull. You sure you want that for you, for your club?” I ask.

  “My club is tucked in nice and safe, you’ll never find them,” he announces.

  I don’t give a fuck if they’re found. I don’t give a fuck about any of the Aryans, their crazy ass shit, Skull, or his crazy ass shit. I care about my boy, my woman, and my club. Nothing else. “Don’t be a pussy, Skull. Don’t hide like a little bitch. Come out and fight me like a man. I’m the one you have a beef with, not my boy, not my woman. Me,” I goad.

  “Well, maybe I will,” he says as if it’s all the same to him. The call ends and I lift my gaze to Snake.

  “Call Crooner and Skinner. Send them to my house, they don’t go in though. They stay out of sight, let’s roll the fuck out,” I growl.

  Snake’s brows furrow. “He’s at your house?”

  I snort. “I said he was mean, I said he followed me here, I didn’t say the fuck was smart.”

  Snake’s lips lift in a smirk. “Let’s roll out, brothers.”

  CARSON

  ROXANNE APPEARS IN MY DOORWAY, her face pale and her eyes wide. “Carson,” she whispers. Then without another word, she throws herself at me and we embrace. “I’ve been a fucking bitch,” she cries.

  Once we break our hug, I look at my friend. Though a few years older than me, she doesn’t look it. “Tell me what is up with you, tell me the truth and take my mind off of all this shit,” I beg.

  “I have schizoaffective disorder,” she admits. “I ran out of meds when we left. That’s a lie,” she whispers. Her eyes meet mine and they’re shining with wetness. “I didn’t bring them. I’d felt so awesome, I stopped taking them and I didn’t even bring them on the trip.”

  “Roxie,” I choke.

  She shakes her head. “I have to check myself in to a hospital. Houston is going to take me. I can’t get stable until I get help. This is my life, Carson. I have to deal with this forever. I’m just sorry that it came out the way it did.”

  Roxanne slips her hand in mine and together we sit in the bed. “You’ll get better and then you can go to beauty school, make babies with Houston, and live happily ever after.”

  She snorts. “No babies, Carson. There is a possibility this is genetic. They don’t know for certain, but I’m not taking any risks. I was sterilized when I was eighteen.”

  My heart breaks, it bleeds for my friend. “I’ll just be the coolest fucking aunt on earth,” she grins.

  I shake my head, lifting my gaze to hers. “You never know what life will bring your way. Maybe Houston will want to adopt,” I smile.

  She gets this faraway look in her eyes and shakes her head as if to rid herself of whatever thoughts have entered her mind. “There’s no future with Houston. He deserves better,” she whispers.

  “Roxie…”

  She holds her hand up and I press my lips together.

  I want to tell her what I’m thinking but she doesn’t want to hear it, at least not yet. Maybe after she’s back to herself, back on her meds she’ll be willing to listen. Right now, she won’t hear anything I say though. She won’t hear that Houston is obviously into her, in a way where he won’t just leave her alone, not even if she pushes. Maybe that’s exactly what she needs, a good man to prove that he’ll stick by her even in her ugliest moments.

  We don’t say anything for what feels like hours. We sit on the edge of the bed, our hands locked and we both stare at the wall in front of us. “Keys will find him, they all will,” Roxanne states.

  “I know,” I breathe.

  Even if I don’t believe it one hundred percent, I have nothing else. So that’s all I have, the belief that Ace will find Axe and make whoever took him, pay, bleed, and burn. My eyes narrow as I think about how whoever took my baby will suffer when my door flies open.

  Roxie and I both turn our heads to see, Hayden, Whitley, Esme, and Ginger standing in the doorway.

  “Okay, you’re coming down to the bar. We’re having cocktails and we set up food that hopefully the men haven’t demolished. You need your sisters around you,” Ginger announces.

  I look down at my oversized clothes, then cringe because I know I must look and smell terrible. “I should shower,” I murmur.

  “You should. You smell like sex,” Roxie announces, wrinkling her nose.

  The women at the door all laugh, which causes my lips to twitch in a smile of my own. Though it is mostly a forced smile, I take it because right now there isn’t much to smile about. “I have some things here if you’d like something to wear,” Ginger offers.

  Though she’s curvier than I am, has way more upstairs and double the booty I have, I nod enthusiastically. She tells me to hold on a minute, then she disappears just as the other women make their way inside of the messy room.

  “Good to know my man isn’t the only messy one,” Whitley states, glancing around.

  I cringe at the state of the disgusting room. Last night, I was too busy to give a shit about cleaning. In the light of day, I realize that it’s one step above inhabitable.

  “You go get dressed, take a nice long shower. We got your back,” Whitley’s soft voice says.

  Lifting my gaze to her, I nod. Normally, I wouldn’t allow the help, normally I would do everything on my own. Today, I don’t mind. Today, I accept the help. Today, I’m just trying to breathe and put one foot in front of the other. I’ll worry about other shit later, today I just need to survive.

  KEYS

  “I HAVEN’T SEEN ANY MOVEMENT,” Crooner announces. “It’s still and dark, quiet. You sure they’re there?” he asks me.

  We’re sitting across from my home, crouched in my neighbor’s bushes, the place that my computer informed me Axe and Skull were located. He could be smarter than I give him credit for, he could technically redirect the signal of his phone, but I honestly don’t think
he’s that talented. I could do it, but I don’t think he could.

  “Let’s storm the fucking place,” Baby suggests from next to me. The hot-headed fucker.

  Snake grunts behind me, but I think about Baby’s suggestion. It ain’t all fuckin’ bad. “Element of surprise,” I murmur. “He thinks we’re sitting around the clubhouse playing with our dicks. He doesn’t know we have his shit figured out.”

  “We don’t know where his club is,” Snake reminds me.

  I shift my eyes over to him. “Skull had Evalyn, how much of a fuck would you give where the other members of his club were?” I ask.

  His jaw clenches and I watch a muscle jump in his cheek. He knows I’m right, he knows he would storm in there and ask questions later, maybe. Most likely, he would just kill everyone in sight.

  “We’re going in,” Snake growls.

  Without another word, we all lift our chins in silent agreement, then, in the broad of daylight we surround my rental house. We break into Carson’s goddamn castle. The front and back door fly open simultaneously and there, in the middle of the room is Skull.

  He lifts his head, his eyes finding mine and he grins. It’s fucking evil. Then, he brings my son to standing from the floor and places the barrel of his gun against Axe’s head. Axe is crying, his big blue eyes meeting mine as huge tears fall down his little cheeks. I try to convey to him that I have this, that it’s all good and he has nothing to worry about as I look at him, but at four, I doubt he’s reading me all that well.

  “Knew you were smart, didn’t think you could find me so fast though. Luckily, I came prepared,” Skull announces.

  “What’s the endgame? The girls, the club, the Aryans, what do you want?” Snake barks. Obviously, not wishing to verbally spar with him.

  Skull tilts his head to the side. “I want it all. I want the money, the bitches, and the devoted followers. Fish had that shit made. Whatever he wanted was handed to him on a platter. I want that.”

  “He also lost his life, you want that too? You can join him in hell anytime you want,” Snake spits.

  “Not going anywhere. I like this quiet little town. I like the bar, the club, and the secluded area. I think I’ll stay,” he shrugs.

  “Over my dead body,” I announce.

  He snorts. “That can be fucking arranged.”

  “Fuck this,” I growl.

  He jerks Axe making a tsking noise. “Remember your brat, Keys,” he sings.

  “So we just standing here staring at one another, for what? Fucking eternity?” Baby asks. “Gotta say, that doesn’t sound appealing. I have a couple whores I’d rather be fucking.”

  Skull’s eyes narrow, and he moves his gun away from Axe but doesn’t remove his grip from my son’s shoulder. “How about I get rid of the urge then, you dumb fuck?” he growls.

  Lifting my own piece, I point it at Skull’s head and pull the trigger. He falls immediately, obviously not anticipating my move. Axe stands stoically. And everyone turns to me.

  “I know he probably had vital information. I also know he wasn’t going to tell us anything,” I announce.

  Walking over to Axe, I pick him up in my arms and pull him into me for a hug. Glancing down over his shoulder at Skull, I cringe. That fuck’s brains are now all over my new flat screen. Carson’s never going to want to come back here knowing this asshole died here. Fuck.

  “You okay, son?” I ask Axe.

  He lifts his head from my neck, his big eyes meeting mine. “I knew you would come and save me,” he smiles. “And you brought all your ninja friends.”

  The men around me chuckle at the innocent words of my boy. “I think your aunt wants to see you, maybe kiss all over you a little bit,” I mutter.

  He scrunches his nose. “She’ll be mushy,” he sighs.

  “Yeah, she will. She loves you, buddy,” I explain.

  He sighs. “Okay, take me to my CarCar.”

  He sounds like he just wants to get it all over with and it makes me smile. He’ll probably be traumatized later, he’ll most likely have nightmares. We’ll have to work through this together, as a family, but I’m glad that as of right now he seems okay. He’s not physically hurt, and this shit that will come, I can deal with.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

  CARSON

  I PACE NERVOUSLY. Snake called and asked the prospects to leave, then informed Ginger that Axe was found, safe and sound. Ace is on his way back, and I’m a mess. I want my boy and I want my man. Wringing my hands together, I look at each of the women who are changing their focus between me and the door, nervously waiting as well. Although they are hiding it a fuck of a lot better than I am.

  The door opens. The sun floods into the bar and I sink to my knees. Ace walks directly over to me, Axe held against his side. I can’t control the flood of tears that fall from my eyes, down my cheeks and onto my borrowed shirt.

  Then, before I can say anything, Axe is thrust into my arms. I wrap him tightly in my embrace, smelling his hair, kissing his cheeks, and crying like a damned disaster. My body jerks with my sobs. I can’t control myself or calm down. I thought that I lost him forever. My baby. Mine.

  Eventually, I calm down enough that Ace can gather us and take us up to his room. Nobody says a word as we walk by. I’m glad for it, otherwise, I might be embarrassed by my dramatic scene. “CarCar, you can put me down.” Axe wriggles as we walk toward the bedroom.

  I sit down, crossing my legs in the middle of the now clean floor. Thanks to Whitley this entire room is so clean that you could eat off of the floor. That woman is magic.

  “No, I can’t,” I admit. “I never want to let you go again.”

  He huffs a puff of air. “You won’t be able to hold me when I ride a bike like my dad. I need to be free to fight ninjas, Auntie.”

  I let out a small laugh from his words. “Okay, but maybe can I hold you for a couple more minutes?” I whisper.

  He’s silent for several moments when he finally speaks, I hear Ace bark out a laugh. “Sure, but no more after this. I’m becoming a man soon you know,” he announces.

  Pulling my head back, I look into his blue eyes. “You are?” I ask, my lips twitching with amusement.

  He nods. “Yeah, thought about it a lot,” he sighs, sounding far too old for his age. “I’m ready to take my place as a man now,” he announces.

  “How about we wait a few years, let your old dad be the man of the house for a while?” Ace asks, crouching down, behind me. I feel his warm palm against my shoulder, he gives me a squeeze.

  Axe frowns, then lifts his gaze from me to Ace. “Okay, but only a couple of years,” he announces.

  “Appreciate that, son,” Ace chuckles.

  Ace sits behind me, his legs coming out and wrapping around my sides. He then wraps his arms around us, cocooning us in his safe embrace. His lips press to the side of my head and I let out a sigh. Within twenty minutes Axe is asleep in my arms.

  “I need to move him to the bed,” Ace murmurs.

  I hum. “I want to stay like this forever, Ace,” I admit, not allowing him to stand.

  “This is our new life, Carson. You, me, him and whoever else we add to our circle. This shit with Skull is done. His group will fade away, the pussies they are. We only have the good things to look forward to, Sweet Pea.”

  “God I hope so,” I breathe.

  LATER THAT NIGHT, after Axe is tucked into bed, we go out in the backyard to attempt to relax from the overboard stress of this day from hell. Ace’s phone rings and he lifts his finger, standing he walks around the side of the house to take the call away from me.

  I’m sure it’s not anything I want to hear, and I have a feeling it’s about earlier today. I really don’t want to know. Not in the slightest. I know everything that I need at this point. Skull is dead, Axe is home safe. End of conversation.

  Although, the house is a little disheveled and the new TV is mysteriously gone. I’m not questioning it, not at all.

  I. Do. Not. Want. To. Know
.

  Sucking in a deep breath, I lift my gaze to the sky. My mind fills with visions of Sadie. I shouldn’t feel guilty for falling in love with Ace. She didn’t really love him. I think maybe in her own way she did, but she wasn’t in love with him. I think she was like Mom, she didn’t really have the capacity to love that way, because she could only live for that next high. That was what consumed her.

  “Thank you, Sadie,” I whisper. “Thank you for giving me Axe. Thank you for bringing Ace into my life. I’ll love them both until the day I die. I’ll live for them, Sadie. I’ll live for you, too,” I rasp. Wiping a tear from beneath my eye, I sigh.

  “You okay, Sweet Pea?” Ace asks, coming back from around the corner.

  I turn my head to him, smiling, I nod.

  “Yeah, I am.”

  The weight of today, the weight of the guilt I’d felt about keeping Ace as my own, somehow feeling as though I was wronging my sister is now gone. I’m finally—free. I’m free of it all. Free of the pain, free of the guilt, free of the heartache. Now, I can finally live.

  “Let’s get to bed,” he grunts.

  Standing, I walk up to him, wrapping my arms around his waist as I rise to my toes and brush my lips across his. “You’ll tell me what that phone call was?” I ask.

  He hums, his lips brushing mine again, his tongue sneaking out to taste me. “Later, Sweet Pea. Let’s go to bed,” he grunts.

  Smiling, I take a step back. He’s going to protect me until the day I die, even if it means it’s just from some phone call. He’ll have my back and that, that is absolutely beautiful. I know that this life of ours is just getting started, and it will have its ups and downs.

  I have a feeling with Ace as my man, the ups will be really freaking up, but the downs will be just as extreme. I’m willing to live that life because I love him. It’s intense, it’s real, and it’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced before.

  Hand-in-hand, we walk toward our bedroom, but not before we make our way toward Axe’s room to check on him. He’s sleeping, his face peaceful and his little body curled into a ball. He looks like the traumatic events from earlier have had zero effect on him. He looks like he does every other night and I send a prayer up to Heaven, to Sadie, that dreams of candy and ninjas fill his mind, instead of fears and Skull.