Blended with Pain: Notorious Devils (Cash Bar Book 4)

by Hayley Faiman

  KEYS

  MY FIGHT, it’s completely drained. Today was the longest goddamn day of my entire life. I feel like I’ve aged about ten years in the span of ten hours. Once we leave a sleeping Axe’s room, we make our way to our own bedroom. Closing the door behind me, I lock it, then turn around to Carson.

  “Pills,” I grunt.

  She lifts her eyes to meet mine and her mouth parts. Holding out my hand, I lift a brow. I walk as she turns from me and heads toward the bathroom. A few seconds of listening to her rummaging around, I walk behind her into the bathroom.

  “Here,” she says softly, placing the object in my hand.

  I squeeze it, then make my way to the toilet. I empty every single pill from the round plastic and foil packet. Flushing them down, I watch as they disappear.

  Turning around to her, I notice her face is pale and she looks nervous. “Making you mine was the best thing I ever fuckin’ did, Sweet Pea, aside from makin’ Axe. Giving you my baby will be the second best,” I announce.

  Her lips tip in a grin and she shakes her head once. She doesn’t speak, just walks past me from the bathroom and into the bedroom. I watch her go, her sweet ass swaying with each step. She turns around, stripping out of her clothes and then stands there, silently naked, and the most beautiful sight I’ve ever encountered.

  “Carson,” I rasp.

  She holds out her hand, palm up. “I love you, Ace,” she simply states.

  Closing the distance between us, I wrap my hands around her small waist. “Yeah, Sweet Pea. I fuckin’ know,” I grunt, brushing my lips across hers. Leaving them pressed against her mouth so that I can breathe in her breath like the fucking lovesick fool that I am.

  “This life is going to be beautiful, isn’t it?” she exhales.

  I smile against her mouth, my tongue sneaking out to taste her lips before I speak. “Yeah, it’s going to be downright goddamn gorgeous,” I announce.

  “You’ll go to the ends of the earth for me, for Axe, wouldn’t you?” she asks.

  Pulling back slightly, I squeeze her waist. “I’d kill for you, Sweet Pea. I killed for Axe. I would walk through fire for you, both of you. I’ll protect you until my last dying breath, no matter what happens, you will always have me, my love, and my protection around you.”

  She smiles at my words, placing her palms on my chest she slides her hands up and around my neck. “I knew it,” she whispers.

  “You did?”

  She smiles. “Yeah, I knew when I met you all those years ago. I knew you were special, you were good deep down. You were wild, but you were good. I dreamt I could have a man like you. I told Sadie she was so stupid to let you walk away from her, but what I didn’t tell her was that I dreamed you would come back for me. Take me away, and give me all that goodness you had in you. I’m selfish, Ace. So damn selfish, and I find it hard to feel truly guilty about being that way.”

  My lips crash against hers, pulling her closer to me, feeling her softness pressing against my body. When I break the kiss, I brush my lips across her cheek until I get to her ear.

  “You are not selfish, you’re goddamn perfect, Carson. Perfect for me. I always wanted you too, Sweet Pea. Never wanted to infect you with my life, but fuck, you never left my mind. Not once.”

  We don’t say anything else.

  Nothing else needs to be said.

  She will be my wife soon.

  She’ll be carrying my child soon.

  Our lives are ready to begin.

  EPILOGUE

  FOUR MONTHS LATER

  KEYS

  I WATCH her from across the room. Gorgeous. She’s breathtaking, as always. My diamond catches the sunlight as she brings her hand to rest on the small swell of her belly. Most people wouldn’t even notice she’s pregnant. I know her body, every fucking square inch of it. I knew before she did. I could taste it when I ate her cunt, see it when I looked at her tits, then when her belly began to round, I brought home a test for her.

  Lifting my beer to my lips, I take a pull as a shadow falls in beside me. “Married, knocked up, branded, and claimed. Never thought you’d be where you are, brother,” Snake murmurs next to me.

  I frown, thinking of his words. He didn’t really know me when I came here. Not well enough to make this kind of statement. Turning my head, I look over at him and wait for him to speak.

  “I was wrong about her,” he admits. “I made an assumption that she was like her sister. She’s the exact opposite. Happy for you, brother. Glad to have you in my club, glad to have her as an Old Lady, too.”

  He doesn’t stick around long enough for me to reply. It’s good. I may say something I shouldn’t. He doesn’t know what he thinks Carson has been through, the shit I’ve learned about her over the past four months. He doesn’t have a single goddamn clue of the hell my woman has survived.

  Taking a step forward, I am halted when Axe appears in front of me. Dipping my chin, I look down at my boy. Five. He’s five now and starting school in less than a year. It’s still unbelievable to me that this is my life, that he is my life.

  “Can I go play with those kids?” he asks, hooking his thumb behind him.

  Lifting my gaze behind him, I notice all the other club member’s little ones playing in a sandbox. A couple are climbing a nearby tree and I grin. “Stay with them, don’t get out of our sight, yeah?” I mumble.

  “Thanks, Dad,” he calls as he turns around and runs as quickly as he can to the group of kids.

  I don’t know why he thought he had to ask me, maybe because this is his birthday party, maybe because that’s just how my woman’s raised him. Probably a mixture of both. My feet move again, taking me toward Carson. As soon as she’s within reaching distance, I place my hand on her small belly and brush my lips across my name on her neck.

  “Ace,” she breathes. I want nothing more than to slip my hand lower and see if that breathy whisper comes with the wet cunt I think it does.

  My tongue peeks out and I taste her neck before I straighten and pull her back against my chest. She turns her head, her lips skimming my jaw. “This is the most perfect birthday party ever,” she exhales.

  I don’t tell her to wait until later. The real celebration will be tonight, in our bed. It wouldn’t be appropriate anyway, especially since this is Axe’s birthday, or at least that’s what she’d tell me.

  Hours pass. I watch the kids play, fuck up a piñata, then get loaded up in Gracie’s car and hauled off to a sleepover. Lea is a goddamn saint. Granted we pay her a fuck ton, still. After Axe was taken, it took her a long time to even think about watching the kids again, but four months later she’s slowly but surely coming back to herself. However, now she has a couple girlfriends from school stay with her, and four prospects instead of just three, every goddamn time.

  Carson turns around once the car is out of sight, her palms resting on my chest and her head tipped back. Dipping my chin, I look into her fucking beautiful eyes, eyes that are full of desire. Fuck. Without a word, I wrap my hand around her wrist and pull her behind me, toward my room—our room.

  She doesn’t stay behind me, she wriggles from my grasp and I watch as she hurries ahead of me. I slow down my gait, happy to watch her, ecstatic that she’s so goddamn eager. Though she usually is, especially at home but here she’s typically more reserved.

  The door is closed by the time I make it to my room. Pushing it open, I slip inside, locking it behind me before I look up to find her. When I see her, my breath hitches. She still has the power to do that to me, even after four months. I don’t know when this feeling will go away, but fuck, I hope it never does.

  Carson is on her knees in the middle of the bed, her thighs spread wide, and completely fucking naked. “Sweet Pea,” I groan.

  She tilts her head to the side, her long hair falling over her shoulder. It’s loose from her braid, wavy and gorgeous, just like her. Shrugging off my cut, I hang it from the doorknob before I divest myself of the rest of my clothes.

&nbs
p; When I’m completely naked, I bring my gaze back to hers. She’s not looking at my eyes though, her focus is on my cock, and I grow even harder as she licks her lips. Wrapping my hand around my length, I squeeze the head to attempt to relieve the pressure, as I make my way to the edge of the bed.

  Reaching for her, I wrap my hand around the back of her neck, my palm pressing against my name there before I apply pressure. She places her hands on the bed until she’s on all fours and her mouth is right in front of my dick.

  “Fuck my mouth, sweetheart,” she breathes. Her breath fans my dick and I grunt.

  Gripping her hair, I pull her a little closer, holding her body still as she opens wide. My cock moves past her lips, slowly filling her until my balls rest against her chin. Her throat constricts around my dick, something we’ve been working on for over a month. I must say, my student is eager as fuck to learn how to deepthroat.

  Next, she said she wants me in her ass. She’ll get that too after my baby comes into this world, then I’ll own all of her, just as I always should have. Just as it was always meant to be. Letting my head drop back, I slowly ease out of her mouth before I repeat the motion. I fuck her slowly, allowing myself to feel her around me each and every time I painstakingly fill her, just like I’m going to do to her cunt in a few moments.

  When I’m on the verge of blowing my load, I tug her off my dick. Her big eyes look up at me, so fucking beautiful, and trusting. That trust, I’ve earned it, finally. I’m never losing it either, it’s mine forever, a gift I didn’t think she’d give to me.

  “Let me see my marks, Sweet Pea,” I rasp, my voice hoarse.

  She knows what I want. Turning around, she reaches behind her and moves her hair to the side. My eyes focus on the Keys mark that she has at the base of her neck. My cock aches at the sight. Wrapping my hands around her hips, I tug her back, sliding my dick through her sweet center, then press it against her pussy.

  “Ace, sweetheart,” she moans.

  Moving one of my hands, I place it at the small of her back and slowly slide it all the way up her spine until I wrap my fingers around the back of her neck, pinning her to the mattress just the way I like her. I ease myself inside of her, careful not to be too rough in order not to hurt the life of mine growing inside of her.

  Seating myself to the root inside of her welcoming cunt, I groan. “I love you, Sweet Pea,” I grunt. “Love you so goddamn much,” I announce before I pull out of her then sink back inside.

  No other words are said. I fuck her, slow and easy, using every ounce of self-control that I possess. Her body trembles beneath mine as she climbs toward her release. I know she won’t come yet, not until I play with that gorgeous clit that I know must be aching by now.

  Sliding my hand from her hip, toward her clit, I groan when I feel her nub. Circling it, she lets out a moan before I pinch her. Fucking her a little harder, I play her clit, bringing us both closer toward our climax.

  I can feel her cunt flutter around me and then it squeezes and I know she’s lost, completely over the crest and coming. Only then do I allow my balls to drain inside of her, to fill her up with my own release. I gently pull out of her, then lie down next to her, pulling her body against mine, and placing her front against my own.

  Lifting my hand, I move her hair out of her face. She looks up at me, her eyes lost in a dreamy haze. “Love you, Sweet Pea,” I murmur.

  She places her palm on my chest and pushes up. Her tits are close to my face, and I resist the urge to take a nipple between my lips, waiting to see what she’s going to say to me.

  “I’ve never been so happy in all my life,” she breathes.

  Sliding my hand up her back, I tug her face closer to mine, my mouth touching hers. “I didn’t think happiness like this existed,” I admit before I pull her mouth against mine and I kiss my woman, pouring all of my love into this simple act.

  Love.

  I thought it was a joke. Something for fools to falsely believe in, to make themselves feel better about their sorry existences. I was wrong. So goddamn wrong.

  I love Carson. Down to my marrow, to the depth of my soul. I love this woman with everything that I am.

  THREE MONTHS LATER

  CARSON

  “DON’T SAY IT,” I groan.

  Roxanne looks down at my belly, then her eyes zero in on my boobs before they travel up to my face. “Your tits are huge,” she smiles.

  “I said don’t say it,” I snap.

  Her smile widens, and she shakes her head. “I’ve missed you,” she whispers.

  I nod, my eyes welling with tears. If I thought I was a crier before I became pregnant, I was wrong. I cry at commercials on television, or when my shoes don’t fit. Everything makes me cry now.

  “I’ve missed you more than you could know,” I sniffle. “How are you though?”

  She nods, her eyes looking far off into the distance. “I’m good. Ready to come home. I have a better plan now, meds that I don’t hate, and I feel really great.”

  I bite the corner of my lip, wondering if I should mention the gigantic elephant in the room. “Houston?” I blurt.

  I watch as Roxie flinches. She shakes her head. “I’m not ready to talk about that,” she breathes.

  “You have to eventually,” I point out.

  She nods. “I know. I have in group, but with you, with him, I just can’t.”

  I want clarification on that, but I don’t push her. She’s just been released from her group therapy home. She’s just able to attempt to live on her own again. She’s scared. I can see it in her face. Tell with her actions.

  “I got the brochures for cosmetology school. I left them on the trailer’s kitchen counter,” I explain, hoping that I didn’t overstep my boundaries.

  She smiles, nodding, but not committing either way. I drop it. I drop Houston and school. Those are things she’s going to have to deal with on her own, in her own time.

  “Do you know what you’re having?” she asks, reaching out to touch my belly.

  I smile, glancing down at her hand on my stomach, then bring my eyes back up to hers. Except the smile she had, it’s gone. She’s staring at my stomach, a look of pure unadulterated pain on her face. It hits me, like a ton of bricks. She’ll never have this. My heart sinks. Completely falls at the thought.

  “A girl,” I whisper.

  Roxie shakes her head, the sad heart-wrenching look disappearing off of her face when she does. Her eyes meet mine and she smiles widely. “Oh no, Keys is in deep shit. You know that girl is going to be gorgeous, just like her mama,” she winks.

  I slide my arm around her shoulders and pull her against my side for a hug. “I love you, Roxie. I’m glad you’re back, and that you’re okay. I’ve missed you.”

  I hear her sniffle, but I don’t look at her, she’d hate that. She leans her head on my shoulder and lets out a deep sigh.

  “I missed you too, Carson. I missed Axe, and even if I’ll never tell him to his face, I missed the hell out of Houston.”

  We stay like that, pressed against one another for too long. Longer than we should. It doesn’t matter though, I would stay like this forever if this is what my friend needed. I love her. She’s back, and she’s healthy. That’s all that matters, the other stuff, it will fall into place, eventually. I hope anyway.

  Something catches the corner of my eye, and I turn my head. It’s Ace. He’s watching us from a distance, leaning against the driver’s side of my SUV. “Go home to him, to your family,” Roxanne breathes.

  Taking a step from her, my arms fall from her body. “When do you need us to pack you up and bring you home?” I ask.

  Her sad eyes meet mine and I shake my head. “I’m not going back. I’m going to stay here,” she states.

  “Roxie,” I exhale as tears fill my eyes.

  “It’s better this way. He needs to move on. I need to move on. He can’t have the life he wants with me there.”

  “You know he wants you, that’s all,” I point
out.

  She smirks. “I know. He can’t have me.”

  Without another word, she turns and walks away from me. Without giving me an opportunity to fight for her, for Houston, for our family. She’s part of us, part of our weird crazy family. We need her. Turning around, I walk back to the SUV. Ace grunts as soon as I’m close enough for him to see my face.

  “She ain’t comin’ home,” he guesses. I shake my head, tears falling freely now from my eyes.

  He moves, bringing his cell to his ears. “Your girl is making a mistake. Bring her home, brother.” He shoves his phone into his pocket and I look up at him, my mouth hanging open slightly.

  “Ace,” I exhale.

  He shakes his head. “She belongs with us. Houston wants all that crazy in his bed. He won’t let her walk away without a fight.”

  Placing my hands on his chest, I slide my palms up and around his neck. He lowers his head, his lips touching my own. “I love you so damn much, sweetheart,” I breathe.

  He chuckles, his tongue snaking out to taste me. “Show me on the way home,” he chuckles.

  Taking a step back, I bite the corner of my lip before I walk around to my side of the SUV. Climbing inside, I buckle up. He chuckles as he does the same, he starts the engine, his eyes turning to find my own.

  “Take me home, maybe take a detour?” I ask, pressing my thighs together.

  He laughs. “Fuck, Sweet Pea, you got it,” he winks.

  I love this man. Every part of him, even the asshole. I love him. I love Keys and Ace, both for completely different reasons but I do love them both. I can’t wait to see what the world has waiting for us.

  I’ve never been so excited in my entire life.

  SPECIAL THANKS

  I want to thank all of my readers, always. You babes are seriously so fantastic. I appreciate every single one of you!!!

  I always say a special thank you to my husband, my best friend, and the man who supports me in every single one of my dreams. He is simply—amazing.