She glanced over her shoulder and realized that sometime during the service, Fernando had entered and taken a seat in the back. He’d probably not wanted to disturb anyone by coming up front to sit with them. But at least he was here.
After church, Leah went to get the boys from the Sunday school classroom, and Nicole hurried over to where she’d seen Fernando sitting. He was gone. Since she didn’t see him in the crowd of people that had gathered afterward, she went outside to see if she could get a better view. His truck was no longer parked in its spot.
“Hey, Nicole,” Miranda Gray, one of the women from Bible study, greeted her warmly. “Some of the people in the singles group are going out for lunch to discuss the sermon and what it means to trust in the Lord while being single. We’d love it if you could join us.”
Was there a polite way to say that she was trusting in the Lord to keep her single after her humiliating almost trip down the aisle? But then she remembered her recent conversations with Erin and Fernando. That mistake had been all about her trusting in herself and doing what she wanted without consulting the Lord.
Did God have someone for her?
Fernando instantly came to mind, which she immediately dismissed as being ridiculous. She’d spent every single day since her failed wedding loathing him. Which wasn’t how she felt about him now. Now, it was more...complicated.
And even if God wanted her to open herself up to the idea of a new relationship, there was still a part of her that feared even making a new friend. Would she get hurt again?
Nicole smiled at Miranda. “It sounds like a lot of fun, but I have things at the ranch I have to do. Maybe another time.”
She hoped her refusal wasn’t too rude. But she wasn’t ready to jump back in to anything, even if it was just hanging out with a bunch of random people from church. She’d already been brave enough in joining the women’s Bible study, but so far, she hadn’t done much to socialize with any of them outside the classroom.
“Sure,” Miranda said. “You guys are really getting that place into shape. I was just driving past the other day, and I noticed you’re working on that old barn of yours. Erin says you’re going to turn it into an event space.”
Even though Nicole knew Miranda was just being friendly, it was hard, trying to have a conversation with someone she wasn’t sure she wanted to get to know. Miranda was probably a very nice person, but...
Janie Roberts, the pastor’s daughter, and another one of the women who often invited her to gatherings, joined them.
“Are you coming to lunch with us?” she asked.
Nicole felt like a jerk for shaking her head. But she’d already opened her heart more this past week than she’d done in over a year, and she wasn’t sure it could bear the weight of doing more.
“I was really hoping you’d come,” Miranda said. “Not only have we all been wanting to get to know you better, but I’d love to hear more about the plans for the barn.”
Janie gave Nicole an understanding look. “We can be overwhelming sometimes, but I promise, everyone is great.”
Could she feel any more like a jerk? They were trying so hard, had been since she’d first started going to church here, yet she couldn’t bring herself to accept their invitations.
“Maybe another time,” Nicole said. “Thanks for asking.”
Not wanting to continue the awkward conversation, Nicole smiled. “I hope you all have a great lunch and a great discussion. I’ll see you around.”
As she turned to leave, Dylan ran up to her. “Look what I made!”
He held up a picture from his Sunday school class, and as he explained it, she reminded herself that she had a wonderful family, and that was all she needed.
When they got back to the ranch, Fernando’s truck was in its usual spot, and he was hard at work on the barn. He’d even had time to change out of his Sunday clothes.
Which meant he’d lied about having errands. There was no way he’d have had time to run any kind of errand, get home, change clothes and be so into the task at hand.
Maybe Nicole was better off not trusting anyone. Sure, it was a white lie, but a lie was a lie, and even the lies people didn’t think would hurt a person ended up being damaging. She should have known better than to trust him.
“How was your errand?” she asked as she walked up on him. Probably stupid to ask him something that would end up making him lie again, but part of her hoped that it would lead to him telling the truth.
Because why would anyone lie about having an errand to run to avoid having to ride with them to church when gas was so expensive?
Fernando hesitated. She squeezed her eyes shut as she tried to block out the image of all the times Brandon had done the same thing when she’d asked where he’d been. He’d been with Adriana and had needed a second to make up a lie. Obviously, Fernando wasn’t cheating on Nicole, but it still didn’t feel good to know he was lying to her.
“I didn’t get the chance to take care of it,” he finally said, looking around. “I needed something from the ranch store, and I forgot to bring measurements.”
It was probably a dumb idea to push the issue, but why was he lying to her?
“What is it? If you give me the information, I can pick it up for you.”
Busted. That was the look on Fernando’s face. How was she supposed to learn to trust people when the first person she’d tried trusting was already lying to her? He didn’t have the best track record, considering he’d already proven in their past that he wasn’t trustworthy.
“I’d rather do it myself,” he said. “But thanks.”
Fernando stood back and gestured at the window opening he’d been working on. “As bad as this old barn looks, I don’t think it will take as much work as you’d anticipated.”
“That’s great news,” Shane said, joining them. “I’ll admit, I was leery of their plan to turn it into an event center, but I know it’s been used for parties and things in the past. Helen used to talk about the dances her family had in here. It’s not so much of a stretch to think we could use it for paid events.”
Even though she was still annoyed at Fernando for lying to her about something so simple, she couldn’t help smiling at Shane’s description. She’d been so young when her father and Helen had divorced, she didn’t remember Helen the way her sisters did. It seemed such a shame that she didn’t have many memories of a woman who’d given them so much.
“Erin found more pictures in the attic,” Nicole said, looking over at Shane. “She brought them over to Ricky’s to see if Ricky could identify anyone in them. Once we get them back, we’re going to make copies to hang in the event center when it’s done, but we thought we’d see if the Colorado Historical Society would like them.”
Shane didn’t look surprised by the information, so Leah must have already told him. “Helen would have been pleased. She used to talk about going through all the old stuff in the attic to see if anything had historical value to the various historical societies in the state. Both her family and Ricky’s were among the first to ranch this area.”
Even though Helen had only been her former stepmother, Nicole felt a sense of pride at being connected to such a long-standing tradition.
“I would love to see the pictures,” Fernando said. “And anything else you have that would give me a sense of what you’re hoping to accomplish. Plus, I love history, so I’d be very interested to see what this old place looked like before.”
Maybe she was being bratty again, and going back to grudge mode, but it was annoying to see how readily Shane had launched into a conversation with Fernando like he was part of their project. She’d just barely thought that maybe she could trust him, but now that she’d caught him in a lie, it only proved he hadn’t really changed. And frankly, she didn’t want to engage any more than she had to with him.
Fernando might have the necessary
skill to train her horse and help with repairs around the ranch, but he’d just very clearly shown that any hope of friendship was totally out of the question.
This was why she wasn’t willing to put herself out there and make new friends or give up her single status. Trust in the Lord, fine. But humans other than her family? Forget about it.
* * *
Fernando couldn’t understand Nicole’s sudden coldness toward him. She’d been blowing hot and cold, but after their discussion the other day about faith, he’d thought they were finally at a place of understanding, if not friendship.
He’d seen how she’d looked for him in the church. She’d probably been expecting him to sit with them. But how could he explain what a big deal it had been for him to go to church at all? He hadn’t wanted to sit with them, then be introduced to their friends and expected to join in, where someone would invariably ask him about his past. He’d end up having to be evasive, which would make him seem shady, and everything would be uncomfortable. It would be worse if he were forced to confess about his past.
Been there, done that, and it had never been successful. Besides, he wasn’t planning on staying around Columbine Springs for long, so it didn’t seem wise to get to know anyone or try to make friends.
As Shane talked about the history of the ranch, Fernando could feel Nicole’s glare intensify.
What had he done wrong?
The boys came running out of the house.
“Mr. Shane! Mom’s ready for us to go to your house,” Dylan said, sounding excited. “She says I was good, so I get to have another riding lesson today.”
Ryan ran over to Shane and gave him a bear hug around the legs. “Me, too,” he said.
Even though it wasn’t an unusual sight, seeing Shane with the boys brought a pang to Fernando’s heart. He’d felt the same way in church, watching all the families interacting with the close friends they’d made there. He might say he was happy enough with his life, but the truth was, it was lonely.
He hadn’t wanted to walk past the fellowship table, brimming with cookies and coffee. Nor had he wanted to slip in and out unnoticed, carefully avoiding the couple waiting to pass out gift bags to new attendees.
But it was easier this way. Because when they found out about his past, none of them would be so eager to see him again. Truth be told, this stopover in Columbine Springs had been a relief for his uncle. His aunt had been afraid to have him hanging around with nothing to do for a month, because people might think Fernando was up to no good.
Shane pulled his cowboy hat off his head and put it on Ryan. “Here you go, cowboy.”
“Hey!” Dylan said, putting his hands on his hips. “It’s my turn to wear the hat.”
He could tell Shane was trying to remember if he’d forgotten whose turn it was or if Dylan was just being difficult. Fernando took off his own hat.
“Want to wear mine for a while?”
Dylan ran to him, grinning. “Thanks!”
As Dylan strutted around proudly, Ryan started to pout. “I want to wear Mr. Nando’s hat!”
“You have my hat,” Shane told him.
“It’s Fer-Nando, not Nando,” Dylan said. “How can you wear his hat if you can’t even say his name?”
The tiny argument caught Fernando off guard with a momentary wave of grief. Adriana used to call him Nando when she was being affectionate. It was strange how these tiny reminders brought pangs to his heart.
“It’s okay,” Fernando told them. “Nando is a nickname for Fernando. My sister used to—”
He shouldn’t have looked over at Nicole as he spoke. Even with the space separating them, the sadness in her eyes was obvious. He’d thought they’d come to a good place with Adriana and his grief, but obviously, his memory of his nickname brought up something else for Nicole.
Leah had come upon them and touched his arm gently. “It’s okay. I’m sure it’s hard, speaking of your loss. I can help Ryan learn to say your name correctly.”
“Don’t,” Fernando said. “I don’t mind. I’m more worried about what set Nicole off this time. I thought we’d finally reached an understanding.”
Nicole had retreated into the horse barn, and Leah followed his gaze. “Give her space,” she said. “Just because she’s finally okay with you doesn’t mean that she’s come to terms with her anger at Adriana.”
Though he nodded, he couldn’t help feeling like there was something more going on. “Do you think she’s offended I didn’t sit with you in church?”
“Maybe,” Leah said. “I know she spent a lot of time looking for you.”
He hadn’t realized what a big deal going to church with them had been for Nicole. “Thanks,” he said. “I didn’t realize she’d wanted me to sit with you all, and we should have clarified what going to church with your family looked like.”
Leah shrugged. “We’re pretty casual. It’s fine if you don’t want to sit with us. I’m sure she was just anxious to try and make you feel welcome in our church.”
The boys ran past them, waving their hats in the air and making horse noises.
“We should probably get going. I promised them riding time at Shane’s. Don’t worry about Nicole. She needs to process whatever is going on in her head, and then she’ll be fine.”
“All right,” Fernando said. “You all have fun. I’m going to finish work on this window.”
He turned back to what he’d been working on, pulling his small notebook out of his pocket. He was sure he’d had the right measurements with him when he’d gone into town this morning, but when he’d gotten into his truck after church and taken a moment to look at his list, he couldn’t find it.
A wasted trip to town. And even more wasted time remeasuring everything. He only had a month here, and he wanted to make the best use of his time.
He glanced over at the horse barn. Should he go try to see what he’d done to upset Nicole? Or should he take Leah’s advice and give her space?
At this point, he was already behind where he’d hoped to get with the work today. Though some people thought it was wrong to work on Sundays because of keeping the Sabbath, for Fernando, the work was the only thing that kept him sane. He’d redo his measurements, finish the prep work he had planned for this area, then go clear his head with Snookie.
Some people said that horses often had the same personality as their owner. In Snookie’s case, he was starting to wonder if maybe that was true. Nicole was a wounded woman, and it was obvious that Snookie had been hurt, too.
Could he find a way to help them both?
Foolishness. He had no business getting involved with Nicole. But it didn’t hurt to pray and ask God to give Nicole what she needed for her healing. In the meantime, he’d do what he could to help the horse who meant so much to her and fix up the barn that the family was counting on for their future. Practical things like that, he could do. The rest, he’d leave up to the Lord.
Chapter Six
The next day, Nicole arrived home from work to find a commotion in her yard. Dylan and Ryan were sobbing in Leah’s arms, and Shane and Fernando appeared to be exchanging angry words.
She jumped out of her car and ran toward them.
“What’s going on?” she asked.
Shane turned to her, anger written all over his face. “I told you not to get that horse. I know we said Fernando could train her, but I’m done being patient. That horse is a danger. She went after the boys again. She bit Dylan.”
Nicole’s stomach hurt. That wasn’t what she wanted at all.
Obviously she’d been selfish in thinking that a horse who needed love was more important than safety.
“Wait just a minute,” Fernando said. “I’ve only been working with her a few days. You can’t expect results overnight. You know that. I know you’re worried about the boys, and I am, too. What were they doing in the barn in the f
irst place?”
She looked over at Leah, who was holding Dylan in her arms. The boys might not have been allowed in the barn, but Snookie still bit him.
“I guess you have a point,” Shane said grudgingly. “I don’t rightly know what happened, but surely you can understand my concern seeing Dylan injured.”
Fernando nodded. “I do. I’m concerned as well. What I’m also concerned with is what behavior was being exhibited around Snookie when she bit him. What was going on to make her want to bite? These factors all make a difference when it comes to knowing what to do. You can get rid of the horse, but that horse is just going to bite someone else.”
Nicole’s stomach clenched. Yes, she was concerned about her nephews’ safety, but that didn’t mean she wanted anyone else to be in danger.
Fernando turned to her. “I think we need to do more investigation. It’s not natural for horses to bite for no reason, and I’d like the chance to find out why.”
Even though this was about a horse, once again Nicole couldn’t help thinking of the situation with Fernando. She’d yelled and accused, but until the other night, she’d never asked for Fernando’s side of the story. She’d assumed it was cut-and-dried that Fernando was obviously not a very good person. Shame on her.
And even though she still felt guilty that Snookie had bitten her nephew, she couldn’t help but feel a small amount of compassion for the horse. Fernando was right. From what she read, horses bit people for a variety of reasons, not all of which were the horse’s fault.
She walked over to where her sister sat on the porch and smiled at Dylan. “What happened, buddy?”
Dylan sniffled. “Your mean horse bit me.”
Nicole nodded and held her arms out to him. “I’m sure that was very scary.”
Dylan nodded as he came to her, and as she wrapped her arms around him, his tears wet her shirt. How did you balance wanting to care for a horse, but also keeping a seven-year-old safe?
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