For Emery

by J. Nathan

  “You okay?”

  I didn’t need to open my eyes to know it was Jordan who’d moved beside me. “I have no idea.”

  His hand slipped into mine. “Whatever you need.”

  I opened my eyes and turned my head so I could see him. “I can’t leave her.”

  His gaze cut to mine. “I know.”

  Tears blurred my vision. “I can’t even begin to imagine what happened in that house.”

  “Em, don’t go there.” He stepped away from the wall to face me, holding my hand and caging me in with his body. “It won’t help anyone.”

  “I hate him, Jordan. He deserves the worst kind of fate.”

  “And he’ll get it. They’ve got the entire police department out looking for him.”

  I scoffed, knowing he was probably already back wherever he’d been living.

  “Don’t. The Emery I knew always looked at the glass half full. Karma will come for him. If not today, soon. I assure you of that.”

  “I left her,” I muttered, my chest tightening around my heart.

  “You followed your dream.”

  “I followed you.”

  His body stiffened and sadness shone in his eyes. “Are we gonna talk about what happened back there?”

  “Do we have to?”

  “Yeah, we do.” He lifted his fingertips to my hairline and brushed my hair back from my face.

  The intimate gesture would’ve sent my heart racing had I not known the truth. He was only trying to make me feel better. About my mom. About me thoroughly embarrassing myself. About him rejecting me.

  “But right now,” he continued, his eyes softening at the corners, “You should get back in there and be there for your mom. She needs you.” He stepped back, giving me space.

  “Yeah.” I slipped my hand free from his and moved away from the wall.

  Jordan disappeared after our hallway encounter, claiming he needed to make some calls since he’d already missed practice back in Alabama. But I wondered if he just didn’t know what to say to me. I didn’t blame him. I wasn’t making a whole lot of sense. One minute I hated what he did to Flip. The next I’m confessing my love for him. It was surprising he hadn’t hopped onto the next plane out of Arizona.

  Maybe he had.

  I spent the majority of the day sitting with my mom—when she wasn’t off having tests done. The nurses kept me abreast of her results. The internal bleeding had ceased, but like the doctor assumed, she suffered three broken ribs and a broken arm. While my mom slept in the late afternoon, I spent time with the detectives in charge of her case. They assured me they’d find Wayne and promised she’d continue to have twenty-four-hour protection. Though, they were unable to tell me what would happen once she was discharged from the hospital.

  “Hope you’re hungry,” Jordan said when he finally returned around dinner time.

  I turned from the chair beside my mom to find him carrying a tray piled high with clear plastic food containers.

  “I wasn’t sure what you might want, so I—”

  “Bought one of everything?” I asked.

  He glanced down at the tray, before holding it out for me to see. “Yup.”

  I grabbed a turkey wrap and soda. “Thank you.”

  “That’s all you want?”

  I nodded.

  He placed the tray down on the small nightstand between the two beds. He dropped down onto the extra bed and ticked his head toward the empty space beside him.

  I looked to my mom who slept soundly, probably due to the extra dose of pain meds added to her drip bag. Jordan grabbed a burger from the tray as I stood and moved to the spot beside him.

  We ate in silence. I was embarrassed and uncomfortable. And, the fact that Jordan hadn’t reacted how I dreamt he would made an already horrific day worse.

  But I couldn’t take it back now. It was out there.

  “Any new information?” he asked.

  I shook my head.

  “So, is the police department gonna keep an open line of communication with you?”

  I nodded as I bit into my wrap. It had been a lot of information to digest.

  My mother’s nurse walked into the room. I could tell something was wrong.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked, bracing myself for more bad news.

  “There was a big accident at the car plant two towns away. The ER has been jammed and now we’re moving patients into rooms.” She lifted her chin toward us. “We need that bed.”

  My body deflated. “Oh.”

  “Honey, I know you want to stay with your mom,” she said. “But there’s a hotel right next door. Why don’t you go get a good night’s sleep, without the monitors beeping. There’s going to be a lot of noise as we get the new patient situated.”

  I glanced to Jordan. He nodded his agreement.

  “Will someone call me if she needs me?” I asked.

  “Of course,” she assured me. “And the police officer is here as well.”

  “I’m going with you. Your mom has security.” Jordan said. “You’ve got me.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  Emery

  Jordan held the keycard to the sensor on the hotel door. Once it clicked, he pushed the door open. I stepped inside the dark room, switching on the light to find a king-sized bed in the center with a mountain of fluffy white pillows. I glanced accusatorially to him.

  He smirked. “There was no way I wasn’t sleeping in the same bed as you.”

  I moved to the bed and lowered myself down onto the edge. “It’s been a long time.”

  “I seriously couldn’t have planned this any better myself,” he said with a smug grin.

  “You mean you didn’t pay off that nurse?”

  He laughed. “I wish I’d thought of that.” He moved to the bed, his smile disappearing as he sat down beside me, the mattress dipping and forcing me into his side. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and held me close.

  “What did your coach say about you missing practice?” I asked.

  He shrugged.

  “Is he gonna bench you Saturday?”

  “He can do whatever he wants.”

  “You need to go back,” I said. “I’ll be fine. The door’s got multiple locks.”

  His eyebrows pinched together in the center. “Do you really think that’s the only reason I’m staying?”

  I shrugged. “You’ve always been good at helping a friend in need.”

  He reached over and gripped my chin, turning my face gently toward his. “Em, you’re more than just a friend to me.”

  I swallowed my nerves. “What am I?”

  His eyes never wavered from mine. “You’re everything good in me.”

  Taken aback by his words—and suddenly very aware of his closeness—I looked away.

  “Don’t go getting shy on me now. I need you looking at me when I say this.”

  My eyes shifted back to his. They stared at me with an intensity I hadn’t seen since he was a kid claiming he’d play football at Alabama.

  “Em.” His hand drifted from my chin to my cheek, cupping it gently. “We’ve been doing this dance for a long time now. And we were just never at the same place. But we’re both here now. You’re finally nineteen. And you just told me you’ve always wanted me—which I’ve gotta tell you, felt fucking amazing.”

  Nervous laughter escaped me.

  “And I think down deep, even when I couldn’t have you, I wanted you too.”

  A ripple the size of a tsunami rolled through my belly as tears filled my eyes.

  “Don’t you dare cry on me right now,” he said. “I want us, Em. I know my timing sucks with everything going on with your mom, but I couldn’t go on letting you think your feelings were one-sided. I’m not entirely sure how this is gonna work, us going from friends to something more, but I want to give it a try.”

  I chewed on my bottom lip, stopping a big dopey grin from spreading across m
y face.

  “Now I need to know one thing.”

  “What?”

  “Have you kissed Flip because—”

  “Jordan? I. Don’t. Want. Flip.”

  He was on me before I could blink, his mouth capturing mine. The same numbness that spread through my lips and down my body four years ago surged through me again. I opened my mouth slightly, and his tongue pushed inside, the kiss reaching all the way down to the tips of my toes. His other hand gripped my other cheek and he held me to him as we devoured each other, neither able to get close enough. Before I knew it, his hands dropped from my cheeks to my hips. Our lips stayed connected as he lifted me and dropped me onto his lap. I straddled him, my hands lifting to the back of his head, my fingers tunneling through his hair and holding him to me.

  He pulled back slightly, his eyes riveting between mine. “Is this what you want?”

  Though my body was a live wire ready to zap everything in a five-mile radius, I shook my head.

  Jordan’s eyes narrowed, questions brewing behind them.

  “You’re what I want,” I said.

  He touched his forehead to mine. “And you’re what I want.”

  I closed my eyes and let his words wash over me like a warm summer breeze. I wanted them to seep into every one of my pores and burrow there where they belonged. Where they always belonged. I opened my eyes to find his trained on mine. “I feel like I’ve been waiting forever for you to realize that.”

  “Sorry it took so long.”

  I pulled back and lifted my fingertips to his cheeks, letting them graze over his skin. Day-old stubble on his jaw tickled the pads on my fingers as they drifted down. “Will you kiss me, Jordan Grady?”

  His lips slid into a knowing smirk as his eyes twinkled with amusement. “Like some day?” he asked, the same way he had the first time I asked the question.

  I shook my head, loving that he remembered.

  He grinned. “Just so we’re on the same page, I plan to kiss you whenever and wherever I want from here on out.”

  I laughed as he buried his mouth in my neck and peppered my collarbone with open-mouthed kisses that sent my eyes crossing. He’d never done that before and the tremors rippling down to my core awoke something inside me. Something I didn’t know I’d been missing. I’d promised myself I’d wait for “The One.” And there wasn’t a doubt in my mind that Jordan Grady was “The One.”

  But...he was right about our timing. It couldn’t have been any worse. And I didn’t want our first time marred by the circumstances that had brought us there together.

  Jordan pulled back and looked me in the eyes. “Where’d you go?”

  “I’m right here.”

  “You’re a terrible liar.”

  “I want this,” I assured him.

  He nodded. “Me too.”

  “But…”

  “But it’s not happening right now,” he said.

  I nodded.

  “Em, do you think I was gonna try to get you naked in a hotel room with your mom across the way in the hospital?”

  I shrugged.

  “Okay, so maybe if you let me, I would’ve,” he snickered. “But, I know our timing sucks. And I know there couldn’t be a worse time for this to be happening. But I really want to kiss the hell out of you right now.”

  I tipped my head back and laughed. It felt so good to laugh when the last couple days had been some of the most trying of my life.

  “And then,” he continued. “I want to sleep next to you all night. Because it’s been too damn long since I held my girl.”

  Butterflies took flight in my belly as I stifled a smile. “Say ‘my girl’ again.”

  He snickered. “My girl.”

  Emotions rushed through me, snagging my breath away. “I like that.”

  “You love that,” he corrected with a grin.

  My fingertips moved back to his cheeks and drifted over them, finally understanding what it felt like to get your biggest wish. “Thanks for being you.”

  He inched closer. “Thanks for making me remember who I am.” He captured my lips with his. This kiss was soft and slow and holding so much more than desire and lust. My body relaxed into him as I let him hold me. Let him pull me closer. Let him want me. Eventually, he pulled away and both our breaths mixed, fast and shallow. “Let’s get you to sleep.”

  A huff of disappointment escaped me. But I knew, regardless of my raging hormones, I needed to sleep and forget everything else for a little while. I climbed off Jordan’s lap and stood, looking down at him.

  He smiled coyly and so much was exchanged in that one smile.

  “I really need to shower.”

  He nodded. “Just know. This is me holding my tongue.”

  My brows dipped. “Why?”

  “Because, there are so many things I’d like to say right now pertaining to you and me in that shower.”

  I snickered. This newfound status change was going to take some getting used to.

  I moved to the bathroom and closed the door behind me. My heart flipped summersaults in my chest as I mentally did a happy dance.

  Jordan Grady called me his girl and meant it.

  Jordan kissed me and meant it.

  Gahhhhhhhh.

  I stepped in front of the mirror and gaped at my flushed cheeks and tussled ponytail. How could I feel so happy after what happened to my mother? Did that make me a horrible person?

  I moved away from the mirror and switched on the shower, peeling off the clothes I’d been wearing since I left Alabama. I tugged my hair free from my elastic and slipped it around my wrist.

  I stepped under the spray of the water and just stood there for a long time, thinking about my mom. And Jordan. And leaving Alabama. I needed to be with my mom. Regardless of her trying to be strong, she needed me. I’d let her down once by not being there. I wouldn’t make that mistake again. I’d transfer to school in Arizona. I could still attain my dream there. I just wouldn’t be doing it with Jordan.

  Once I eventually lathered my skin and hair with the hotel soap and shampoo, the water became cooler. I’d been in there longer than I’d wanted to. I switched off the water and dried off with a soft white towel. Not wanting to put my dirty clothes back on, I wrapped another towel around my body and tied my hair into a knot on top of my head.

  I checked myself in the mirror one more time, noting my pink cheeks thanks to the hot water and “the Jordan effect,” then pulled opened the door.

  Jordan had pulled down the comforter and sheets and sat on the edge of the bed in nothing but his boxers, waiting for me. “I wasn’t sure what side you wanted.”

  I smiled. “What’s with the gentleman act?”

  “You wouldn’t think I was a gentleman if you could hear what I’m thinking right now seeing you in that towel,” he said, a devious glint in his eyes.

  I chuckled as I lifted my chin toward the bed. “You get in first. I’ll take this side.”

  He climbed under the sheets and turned on his side, resting his head in his palm as he watched me climb in.

  I turned on my side away from him. If I was going to get any sleep, I needed to not be looking at him.

  His arms slipped around my waist and he pulled me against his bare chest. I closed my eyes and reveled in the nostalgia washing over me. It had been four years since he held me that way. I’d missed being in his arms, missed it so damn much. His heartbeat reverberated off my back, practically in sync with mine. We lay like that for a long time, both of us undoubtedly having the same thoughts.

  He buried his nose in my hair. “Feels like home.”

  My belly rippled something fierce. “Because it is.”

  And as much as I wanted to stay awake and lose myself in the feel of being in Jordan’s arms again, the security he provided allowed sleep to pull me under and fill my mind with beautiful dreams.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  Grady

  I
awoke to a dark room, the bedside clock reading six a.m. Emery lay in my arms in the same position we’d fallen asleep. It was as if I’d been transported to my childhood bedroom. Only now, she was naked under her towel. I pressed my lips to her bare shoulder, wishing our circumstances were different. We hadn’t discussed the fact that she’d be staying in Arizona, but I knew her. She wouldn’t leave her mom again.

  So, where’d that leave us?

  Bringing it up seemed like a terrible idea. It would only ruin what had happened between us, and there was no way in hell I was gonna be the one to do that.

  I thought about her towel and couldn’t resist. I leaned down and peppered her bare shoulders with soft kisses, her skin satin to my chapped lips.

  “Mmmmm,” she murmured as I created a path to the nape of her neck, tracing my tongue up and down the dip beneath her hairline.

  “Ahhhh,” she breathed.

  I teased her a little more before abandoning that spot and tracing a path of open-mouthed kisses across her back.

  Without warning, she twisted in my arms. “You need to stop.”

  “Why?”

  Her sleepy smile was a welcome vision. “Because it feels so good.”

  I chuckled before dropping kisses all over her face. “If you thought that felt good, wait until we get back to school where I’ll have you all to myself.”

  “If I go back to school.”

  “When you go back to school,” I repeated.

  Time seemed to stall as I could tell she was thinking some serious thoughts. “Promise?”

  “Promise,” I assured her.

  She buried her head against my chest and sighed.

  Never in a million years, when that tiny eight-year-old showed up at my window, had I thought this was how we’d end up. But now that we had, I didn’t want to do a damn thing to ruin it.

  “I have an idea,” I said.

  “What?” she asked, her head beneath my chin.

  “I’ll tell you when I get it all worked out. In the meantime, there’s something I need to tell you.”

  She pulled back so she could see me and I watched her swallow down hard. “What?”

  “I need you to know why I punched Flip.”