The Provost

by John Galt

  As soon as it was understood among the commonality that the French weredetermined to subdue and make a conquest of Britain, as they had done ofall the rest of Europe, holding the noses of every continental king andpotentate to the grindstone, there was a prodigious stir and motion inall the hearts and pulses of Scotland, and no where in a more vehementdegree than in Gudetown. But, for some reason or an other which I couldnever dive into the bottom of, there was a slackness or backwardness onthe part of government in sending instructions to the magistrates to stepforward; in so much that the people grew terrified that they would beconquered, without having even an opportunity to defend, as their fathersdid of old, the hallowed things of their native land; and, under thesense of this alarm, they knotted themselves together, and actually drewout proposals and resolutions of service of their own accord; by whichmeans they kept the power of choosing their officers in their own hands,and so gave many of the big-wigs of the town a tacit intimation that theywere not likely to have the command.

  While things were in this process, the government had come to its senses;and some steps and measures were taken to organize volunteer corpsthroughout the nation. Taking heart from them, other corps were proposedon the part of the gentry, in which they were themselves to have thecommand; and seeing that the numbers were to be limited, they had a wishand interest to keep back the real volunteer offers, and to get their ownaccepted in their stead. A suspicion of this sort getting vent, anoutcry of discontent thereat arose against them; and to the consternationof the magistrates, the young lads, who had at the first come so brisklyforward, called a meeting of their body, and, requesting the magistratesto be present, demanded to know what steps had been taken with theiroffer of service; and, if transmitted to government, what answer had beenreceived.

  This was a new era in public affairs; and no little amazement and angerwas expressed by some of the town-council, that any set of persons shoulddare to question and interfere with the magistrates. But I saw it wouldnever do to take the bull by the horns in that manner at such a time; soI commenced with Bailie Sprose, my lord being at the time provost, andearnestly beseeched him to attend the meeting with me, and to give a mildanswer to any questions that might be put; and this was the morenecessary, as there was some good reason to believe, that, in point offact, the offer of service had been kept back.

  We accordingly went to the meeting, where Mr Sprose, at my suggestion,stated, that we had received no answer; and that we could not explain howthe delay had arisen. This, however, did not pacify the volunteers; butthey appointed certain of their own number, a committee, to attend to thebusiness, and to communicate with the secretary of state direct;intimating, that the members of the committee were those whom theyintended to elect for their officers. This was a decisive step, and tookthe business entirely out of the hands of the magistrates; so, after themeeting, both Mr Sprose and myself agreed, that no time should be lost incommunicating to the lord-lieutenant what had taken place.

  Our letter, and the volunteers' letter, went by the same post; and onreceiving ours, the lord-lieutenant had immediately some conference withthe secretary of state, who, falling into the views of his lordship, inpreferring the offers of the corps proposed by the gentry, sent thevolunteers word in reply, that their services, on the terms they hadproposed, which were of the least possible expense to government, couldnot be accepted.

  It was hoped that this answer would have ended the matter; but there werecertain propugnacious spirits in the volunteers' committee; and theyurged and persuaded the others to come into resolutions, to the effectthat, having made early offers of service, on terms less objectionable inevery point than those of many offers subsequently made and accepted,unless their offer was accepted, they would consider themselves as havingthe authority of his majesty's government to believe and to represent,that there was, in truth, no reason to apprehend that the enemy meditatedany invasion and these resolutions they sent off to London forthwith,before the magistrates had time to hear or to remonstrate against the useof such novel language from our burgh to his majesty's ministers.

  We, however, heard something; and I wrote my lord, to inform him that thevolunteers had renewed their offer, (for so we understood theirrepresentation was;) and he, from what he had heard before from thesecretary of state, not expecting the effect it would have, answered me,that their offer could not be accepted. But to our astonishment, by thesame post, the volunteers found themselves accepted, and the gentlementhey recommended for their officers gazetted; the which, as I tellfrankly, was an admonition to me, that the peremptory will of authoritywas no longer sufficient for the rule of mankind; and, therefore, Isquared my after conduct more by a deference to public opinion, than byany laid down maxims and principles of my own; the consequence of whichwas, that my influence still continued to grow and gather strength in thecommunity, and I was enabled to accomplish many things that mypredecessors would have thought it was almost beyond the compass of manto undertake.

  CHAPTER XXIX--CAPTAIN ARMOUR

  In the course of these notandums, I have, here and there, touched ondivers matters that did not actually pertain to my own magisterial life,further than as showing the temper and spirit in which different thingswere brought to a bearing; and, in the same way, I will now again stepaside from the regular course of public affairs, to record an occurrencewhich, at the time, excited no small wonderment and sympathy, and inwhich it was confessed by many that I performed a very judicious part.The event here spoken of, was the quartering in the town, after theremoval of that well-behaved regiment, the Argyle fencibles, the mainpart of another, the name and number of which I do not now recollect; butit was an English corps, and, like the other troops of that nation, wasnot then brought into the sobriety of discipline to which the wholeBritish army has since been reduced, by the paternal perseverance of hisRoyal Highness the Duke of York; so that, after the douce and respectfulHighlanders, we sorely felt the consequences of the outstropolous andgalravitching Englishers, who thought it no disgrace to fill themselvesas fou as pipers, and fight in the streets, and march to the church onthe Lord's day with their band of music. However, after the firstSunday, upon a remonstrance on the immorality of such irreligiousbravery, Colonel Cavendish, the commandant, silenced the musicians.

  Among the officers, there was one Captain Armour, an extraordinar welldemeaned, handsome man, who was very shy of accepting any civility fromthe town gentry, and kept himself aloof from all our ploys andentertainments, in such a manner, that the rest of the officers talked ofhim, marvelling at the cause, for it was not his wont in other places.

  One Sabbath, during the remembering prayer, Mr Pittle put up a few wordsfor criminals under sentence of death, there being two at the time in theAyr jail, at the which petition I happened to look at Captain Armour,who, with the lave of the officers, were within the magistrates' loft,and I thought he had, at the moment, a likeness to poor Jeanie Gaisling,that was executed for the murder of her bastard bairn.

  This notion at the time disturbed me very much, and one thought afteranother so came into my head, that I could pay no attention to Mr Pittle,who certainly was but a cauldrife preacher, and never more so than onthat day. In short, I was haunted with the fancy, that Captain Armourwas no other than the misfortunate lassie's poor brother, who had in sopathetical a manner attended her and the magistrates to the scaffold;and, what was very strange, I was not the only one in the kirk whothought the same thing; for the resemblance, while Mr Pittle was praying,had been observed by many; and it was the subject of discourse in my shopon the Monday following, when the whole history of that most sorrowfulconcern was again brought to mind. But, without dwelling at large on theparticularities, I need only mention, that it began to be publiclyjealoused that he was indeed the identical lad, which moved every body;for he was a very good and gallant officer, having risen by his ownmerits, and was likewise much beloved in the regiment. Nevertheless,though his sister's sin was no fault of his, and could not impair theworth of
his well-earned character, yet some of the thoughtless youngensigns began to draw off from him, and he was visited, in a manner, withthe disgrace of an excommunication.

  Being, however, a sensible man, he bore it for a while patiently, may behoping that the suspicion would wear away; but my lord, with all hisretinue, coming from London to the castle for the summer, invited theofficers one day to dine with him and the countess, when the fact wasestablished by a very simple accident.

  Captain Armour, in going up the stairs, and along the crooked oldpassages of the castle, happened to notice that the colonel, who was inthe van, turned to the wrong hand, and called to him to take the otherway, which circumstance convinced all present that he was domesticallyfamiliar with the labyrinths of the building; and the consequence was,that, during dinner, not one of the officers spoke to him, some fromembarrassment and others from pride.

  The earl perceiving their demeanour, enquired of the colonel, when theyhad returned from the table to the drawing-room, as to the cause of sucha visible alienation, and Colonel Cavendish, who was much of thegentleman, explaining it, expressing his grief that so unpleasant adiscovery had been made to the prejudice of so worthy a man, my lord wasobserved to stand some time in a thoughtful posture, after which he wentand spoke in a whisper to the countess, who advised him, as her ladyshipin the sequel told me herself, to send for me, as a wary and prudent man.Accordingly a servant was secretly dispatched express to the town on thaterrand; my lord and my lady insisting on the officers staying to spendthe evening with them, which was an unusual civility at the _pro forma_dinners at the castle.

  When I arrived, the earl took me into his private library, and we hadsome serious conversation about the captain's sister; and, when I hadrelated the circumstantialities of her end to him, he sent for thecaptain, and with great tenderness, and a manner most kind and gracious,told him what he had noticed in the conduct of the officers, offering hismediation to appease any difference, if it was a thing that could bedone.

  While my lord was speaking, the captain preserved a steady and unmovedcountenance: no one could have imagined that he was listening to anything but some grave generality of discourse; but when the earl offeredto mediate, his breast swelled, and his face grew like his coat, and Isaw his eyes fill with water as he turned round, to hide the grief thatcould not be stifled. The passion of shame, however, lasted but for amoment. In less time than I am in writing these heads, he was againhimself, and with a modest fortitude that was exceedingly comely, heacknowledged who he was, adding, that he feared his blameless disgraceentailed effects which he could not hope to remove, and therefore it washis intention to resign his commission. The earl, however, requestedthat he would do nothing rashly, and that he should first allow him totry what could be done to convince his brother officers that it wasunworthy of them to act towards him in the way they did. His lordshipthen led us to the drawing-room, on entering which, he said aloud to thecountess in a manner that could not be misunderstood, "In Captain ArmourI have discovered an old acquaintance, who by his own merits, and undercircumstances that would have sunk any man less conscious of his ownpurity and worth, has raised himself, from having once been my servant,to a rank that makes me happy to receive him as my guest."

  I need not add, that this benevolence of his lordship was followed with amost bountiful alteration towards the captain from all present, in somuch that, before the regiment was removed from the town, we had thesatisfaction of seeing him at divers of the town-ploys, where he receivedevery civility.

  CHAPTER XXX--THE TRADES' BALL

  At the conclusion of my second provostry, or rather, as I think, after itwas over, an accident happened in the town that might have led to nolittle trouble and contention but for the way and manner that I managedthe same. My friend and neighbour, Mr Kilsyth, an ettling man, who hadbeen wonderful prosperous in the spirit line, having been taken on for abailie, by virtue of some able handling on the part of Deacon Kenitweel,proposed and propounded, that there should be a ball and supper for thetrades; and to testify his sense of the honour that he owed to all thecrafts, especially the wrights, whereof Mr Kenitweel was then deacon, hepromised to send in both wine, rum, and brandy, from his cellar, for thecompany. I did not much approve of the project, for divers reasons; theprincipal of which was, because my daughters were grown into youngladies, and I was, thank God, in a circumstance to entitle them to holdtheir heads something above the trades. However, I could not positivelyrefuse my compliance, especially as Mrs Pawkie was requested by BailieKilsyth, and those who took an active part in furtherance of the ploy, tobe the lady directress of the occasion. And, out of an honour and homageto myself, I was likewise entreated to preside at the head of the table,over the supper that was to ensue after the dancing.

  In its own nature, there was surely nothing of an objectionableprinciple, in a "trades' ball;" but we had several young men of thegentle sort about the town, blythe and rattling lads, who were welcomeboth to high and low, and to whom the project seemed worthy of aridicule. It would, as I said at the time, have been just as well tohave made it really a trades' ball, without any adulteration of thegentry; but the hempies alluded to jouked themselves in upon us, andobligated the managers to invite them; and an ill return they made forthis discretion and civility, as I have to relate.

  On the nightset for the occasion, the company met in the assembly-room,in the New-inns, where we had bespoke a light genteel supper, and hadM'Lachlan, the fiddler, over from Ayr, for the purpose. Nothing could bebetter while the dancing lasted; the whole concern wore an appearance ofthe greatest genteelity. But when supper was announced, and the companyadjourned to partake of it, judge of the universal consternation that wasvisible in every countenance, when, instead of the light tarts, and nicejellies and sillybobs that were expected, we beheld a long table, with arow down the middle of rounds of beef, large cold veal-pies on pewterplates like tea-trays, cold boiled turkeys, and beef and bacon hams, and,for ornament in the middle, a perfect stack of celery.

  The instant I entered the supper-room, I saw there had been a plot: poorBailie Kilsyth, who had all the night been in triumph and glory, was fora season speechless; and when at last he came to himself, he was like tohave been the death of the landlord on the spot; while I could remark,with the tail of my eye, that secret looks of a queer satisfaction wereexchanged among the beaux before mentioned. This observe, when I madeit, led me to go up to the bailie as he was storming at the bribed andcorrupt innkeeper, and to say to him, that if he would leave the matterto me, I would settle it to the content of all present; which he,slackening the grip he had taken of the landlord by the throat, instantlyconceded. Whereupon, I went back to the head of the table, and saidaloud, "that the cold collection had been provided by some secretfriends, and although it was not just what the directors could havewished, yet it would be as well to bring to mind the old proverb, whichinstructs us no to be particular about the mouth of a gi'en horse." ButI added, "before partaking thereof, wel'll hae in our bill frae thelandlord, and settle it,"--and it was called accordingly. I coulddiscern, that this was a turn that the conspirators did not look for. It,however, put the company a thought into spirits, and they made the besto't. But, while they were busy at the table, I took a canny opportunityof saying, under the rose to one of the gentlemen, "that I saw throughthe joke, and could relish it just as well as the plotters; but as thething was so plainly felt as an insult by the generality of the company,the less that was said about it the better; and that if the whole bill,including the cost of Bailie Kilsyth's wine and spirits, was defrayed, Iwould make no enquiries, and the authors might never be known." Thisadmonishment was not lost, for by-and-by, I saw the gentleman confabbingtogether; and the next morning, through the post, I received a twenty-pound note in a nameless letter, requesting the amount of it to be placedagainst the expense of the ball. I was overly well satisfied with thisto say a great deal of what I thought, but I took a quiet step to thebank, where, expressing some doubt of the g
oodness of the note, I wasinformed it was perfectly good, and had been that very day issued fromthe bank to one of the gentlemen, whom, even at this day, it would not beprudent to expose to danger by naming.

  Upon a consultation with the other gentlemen, who had the management ofthe ball, it was agreed, that we should say nothing of the gift of twentypounds, but distribute it in the winter to needful families, which wasdone; for we feared that the authors of the derision would be found out,and that ill-blood might be bred in the town.

  CHAPTER XXXI--THE BAILIE'S HEAD

  But although in the main I was considered by the events and transactionsalready rehearsed, a prudent and sagacious man, yet I was not free fromthe consequences of envy. To be sure, they were not manifested in anyvery intolerant spirit, and in so far they caused me rather molestationof mind than actual suffering; but still they kithed in evil, and therebymarred the full satisfactory fruition of my labours and devices. Amongother of the outbreakings alluded to that not a little vexed me, was onethat I will relate, and just in order here to show the animus of men'sminds towards me.

  We had in the town a clever lad, with a geni of a mechanical turn, whomade punch-bowls of leather, and legs for cripples of the same commodity,that were lighter and easier to wear than either legs of cork or timber.His name was Geordie Sooplejoint, a modest, douce, and well-behaved youngman--caring for little else but the perfecting of his art. I had heardof his talent, and was curious to converse with him; so I spoke to BailiePirlet, who had taken him by the hand, to bring him and his leather punch-bowl, and some of his curious legs and arms, to let me see them; thewhich the bailie did, and it happened that while they were with me, incame Mr Thomas M'Queerie, a dry neighbour at a joke.